“I don’t know. Because you’re a horrible alpha, maybe? It won’t be long before there are more of us whose minds you can’t touch.”
“It’s because Judah’s gone,” I said. “I’m stronger when he’s here.”
“It’s because you’re not dominant enough,” she said. “And because you weren’t enough to make him bond with you. It’s because something is wrong with you.”
“Look,” I said. “We will get him back, but I don’t know how yet. Let me have a night to rest. We’ll convene the council tomorrow, and we’ll make a plan. We can track his scent until we find him, infiltrate the city if we have to, whatever it takes. I won’t leave him there. You have my word.”
She narrowed her eyes. “Why? Because you love him?”
“Yes, I do.”
“You couldn’t possibly—
“I love him as a brother, as pack,” I said. “As my male alpha. And as my mate, but not… no, I don’t want to compete with you for his affection or love. He wants you, and only you. I want you two to be together. I told him that I did.”
“You said that to trick him into your little snare,” she said. “I don’t believe it for a second. You were planning to get him captured. You were trying to get rid of him.”
“I wasn’t,” I said. “I would never do that.”
“You’re… you’re…” She was crying again, and she couldn’t seem to speak. “I hate you,” she finally managed, her voice crowded with tears. “I hate you so much.” And then she turned and sprinted out of the lodge, leaving me alone.
I buried my face in my hands.
What was I going to do?
* * *
After a while, I got myself together and headed back to my house, which seemed so empty without Judah in it. I even climbed into his bed, because smelling his scent seemed to calm me and make me feel stronger. I was frightened that I was not alpha enough for the pack. I was frightened that Tempest was right and there was something wrong with me.
The safety of the entire pack was on my shoulders now, and I also needed to rescue Judah. I had no idea how I was going to do that.
I was exhausted, and I needed to sleep, but I tossed and turned, all of my cares weighing on me even as I breathed in the scent of Judah on his blanket and pillows. I had to get him back. The pack needed him. I needed him. I couldn’t do this alone.
Finally, I settled into an uneasy sleep, full of awful dreams. I was in the woods, trying to find Judah, but my cloak kept coming undone, and Landon was there. His eyes glowed yellow as he pounced on me, ripping into my skin with his claws and tearing into my flesh with his teeth. I was bleeding out, in so much pain, watching him destroy my body, only to wake up with a start, my heart pounding.
I would get back to sleep again, and the dream would repeat. It was awful.
The final time I woke up, I smelled smoke.
There was noise from outside, people yelling and screaming. I hurried out of bed and ran to the window. Outside, it was chaos. More than one house was on fire. People were running through the streets, screaming, clutching small children in their arms. They were being chased by bloodhounds. The village was overrun with them.
The bloods had followed us back from their headquarters, or maybe tracked us through the woods. If the protective spell hadn’t been weak, it would have kept them out. I felt acutely sad and guilty.
I reached out to make the wolves shift. I managed it with about two-thirds of them, but there was a third of the pack whose minds I couldn’t seem to touch. They had turned against me like Tempest or perhaps I had grown weaker. I didn’t know what was going on.
The shifted wolves could at least fight the bloods.
I ran out of my porch, into flame-lit streets, and now there were wolves and bloods snapping their teeth at each other, circling each other, leaping at each other, their teeth gleaming as they growled.
But even with the whole pack in wolf form, we’d be no match for the bloods.
We needed to retreat.
And that was when I somehow knew—an image in my head from the collective consciousness of the pack. There was another village, a hunting village where the pack sometimes went in the summer. It was further up in the mountains and we could go there for safety. But we mustn’t all go together. I needed to get the wolves broken up and moving in small groups. We needed to scatter, so that we were harder to track. Someone needed to tell this to the human members of the pack. And we all needed to do it now, while the wolves that were fighting the bloods were creating a distraction.
But I couldn’t seem to get into the minds of any of the wolves now. It was as though I’d blown out my capacity by having them shift. Now, I was incapable of doing anything.
I grabbed the first human who ran by me and told them to go to the hunting village. “Spread the word. Go in small groups.”
The man yanked his hand out of mine and continued to run. I wasn’t sure if he would even listen to me.
And then, awful bright pain burst in my midsection.
I looked down, and there were claws sticking out of my belly button and my blood was soaking my shirt.
I didn’t understand, and then I realized that there was a bloodhound behind me, and it had punctured me from behind. Now, it pulled its claws out and I sank to the ground, gurgling in pain and fear.
I had failed everyone.
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
The world was smoky and full of heat and flame. I was lost to it. Everything hurt, and I wanted to sink away from that pain. There was a soft, gray, space of nothing that was calling for me. I was fairly sure it was death, but I didn’t care, because it hurt so bad. I knew that werewolves were very hard to kill in wolf form, but I was in human form, and it wasn’t going to take much to kill me. I could bleed out right here.
Someone grabbed my feet and started to drag me, but I was barely cognizant of that. Everything was so strange and blurry. It was too loud and too hot, and I wanted it to go away. I wanted it all over. The pain, the pain, the pain. It hurt so much.
“Stop,” said a voice.
A familiar voice. Why did I know that voice?
“I don’t think this one is any good,” said the voice. “I think she’s a werewolf.”
“Looks human to me,” said another voice, scratchy and distorted.
“Maybe she shifted,” said the familiar voice again.
Desta!
My sister’s face swam over me. She was standing over me, looking down.
“Honestly, maybe it doesn’t make sense to take any blood slaves at all. If they’re wolves, there’s the risk of bites. No one wants a blood slave that bites.”
“Whatever you say,” said the other voice. My legs were dropped and another figure moved away from me.
Desta looked down at me. “Shift,” she whispered. “Why aren’t you shifting?”
Hmm. That was an interesting question. Why wasn’t I shifting? If I shifted, I could heal this pain…
I did it, letting the change wash through me and over me. In seconds, I was standing on all four legs. I threw back my head and howled, even though the moon wasn’t full.
“Get your people out of here,” Desta said to me, and she walked away, leaving me there.
Now that I was in wolf form, I could think better. And my connection to the pack seemed stronger too. I could make wolves move. I could start sending off a few here and there to go up the mountain. I could move others to attack bloods and allow others to escape. I felt as if I could see through all their eyes, and I knew what was happening in all parts of the village.
I took off running, moving through the streets as quickly as I could.
I moved as many wolves out as possible. I noted that the humans seemed to have left, or run. Hopefully, Desta’s orders had kept anyone from being captured.
As the village emptied while my people retreated, the bloods seemed to be running out of steam. With no one to hunt, they hurled themselves into burning walls to knock them down. The buildings
collapsed in a shower of sparks, and the bloodhounds didn’t seem to notice that they were hurting themselves. One was pinned under a burning piece of wood, but kept snarling and raking his claws, as though he was consumed with destruction, so much so that he didn’t realize he was burning to death.
It must be the rage mode I’d heard about. The bloods turned off and became mindless killing machines.
I didn’t see Desta again, or any other vampires. Once I got all of my wolves out, I left the village too, and I made my way up the mountain with a heavy heart.
I couldn’t believe how quickly things had changed. It seemed unreal.
Just days ago, my biggest problem had been how I could strengthen my bond to Judah without any romantic feelings toward him.
And now, Judah was captured and the village had been destroyed. We had no home, and we were defenseless refugees in the woods. I was the lone alpha, with an entire pack depending on me.
I could not wrap my head around this extreme about-face that had occurred. But somehow, I knew that I had to react against it, even though I couldn’t quite comprehend it. I had to move now and do what I could for my pack. There would be time to sit back and think about it all later.
The morning sun was high in the sky by the time I reached the hunting village. It was spread out amongst the bare winter tree trunks, cabins cut into the hill above me. Some of them were up on stilts, made of logs, others were made from stone and wood. The roofs were covered in a layer of snow, because it was colder this high on the mountain than it had been down in our village. A cold breeze blew through the air, dead leaves and chimney smoke caught up in it.
I could see that this place could be a welcome sight under different circumstances. But now it only seemed desolate and inadequate. A refuge certainly, but only a shadow of our former home. Sadness hung heavy everywhere, along with the chilly morning mist.
I reached out to feel the minds of the pack, and my heart sank. Not all of the wolves were here. I couldn’t tell who was gone exactly, but I could tell that our numbers had been lessened, and I was sick with grief.
I sought out the minds of the council members and I called them to me.
There was no lodge for a meeting here, but there was an outdoor amphitheater, a natural valley cut into the earth where the wolves sometimes gathered. I called them there, and they met me with a cloak that I draped over my shoulders as soon as I shifted.
“I’m sorry,” I said to them.
“It’s not your fault,” Henry said, stepping forward. “It’s Tempest. She’s done this.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
“What do you mean, Tempest has done this?” I said.
“She took off with a big group of the pack,” said Neil, who looked beleaguered and exhausted. “I begged her not to, but she didn’t listen. You all know I was never in favor of this strike against the bloodhounds, but now that it’s done, I think we need to stand together as a pack. She’s blinded by her misguided hatred of you, Camber. She needs to accept that you’re the alpha.”
“Obviously, she hasn’t accepted that if she left,” I said. “Look, what’s our next move? How do we get Judah back?”
Henry shook his head at me. “We’ve got to let Judah go, Camber, as painful as that may be.”
“You can’t seriously expect me to do that,” I said.
“What’s more important is the pack,” said Neil. “We need safety. We can’t stay here. It’s not protected by a protection spell for one thing. For another, these are summer cabins. They aren’t outfitted for the winter. Some do have fireplaces and heat, but many of them don’t have the proper windows or they may not be properly insulated. It’s not a longterm solution.”
“Right,” I said, rubbing my forehead. “And Tempest is out there with others from the pack, and they’re not safe.”
“What I don’t understand,” spoke up Mary, “is why the protection spell didn’t hide us.”
“I think that’s my fault,” I said. “I’ve been told over and over that Judah’s and my bond was tied into that protection spell. And we didn’t have a strong bond.”
“Because of Tempest,” said Henry darkly.
“Probably,” I said. I spread my hands. “Listen, do we know? Does it matter if Judah has a strong bond with his female alpha? Couldn’t he be mated to Tempest and they could have a strong bond, and couldn’t the spell be tied to the two of them instead?”
“Mated to a wolf who’s not an alpha? I don’t think so,” said Neil.
“But it could be possible to tie the spell to a different bond than yours and Judah’s,” said Mary.
“Really?” I turned to her. “So, what? We go back to Vivia and bring Tempest along and tell her we want another spell, but to tie it to Tempest and Judah? Could that work? Or do we need Judah back first?”
“Wait, what are you saying?” said Henry. “Don’t you want to be bonded to Judah? Don’t you want to be the alpha? Because if you’re going to leave us—”
“I’ll always be your alpha,” I said. “I know that I was meant for it. I can feel it in my blood and bones and teeth. But I don’t think I was meant to be Judah’s mate. It’s never felt right. Tempest has done things that have angered me, but she’s dying inside because that’s how much she loves Judah. Tearing them apart is needlessly cruel. If there is a way around it, I want it. And if, at the same time, we can get Tempest back into the fold, then we have to do that. We can’t leave members of the pack behind.”
“Exactly,” said Mary. “Spoken like a true alpha who wants happiness for all the wolves of the pack. Your compassion for Tempest is inspiring.”
“Or idiotic,” said Neil.
“Now, now,” said Henry to Neil. “We oughtn’t speak that way to our alpha.”
“She’s practically a child,” said Neil. “She’s been a werewolf for what? Two months? We are the elders of the community. We have to speak our minds. She counts on us to advise her.”
“I do,” I said. “I take your opinion under advisement, Councilman Neil. But I do feel strongly that there will never be a romantic tie between Judah and me.”
“Perhaps that’s because you were never meant to be his mate,” said Neil. “Perhaps, now, as Henry suggested, you must take another mate. We could probably stay here in the hunting village for three weeks at the most. In that time, we could send word out to other packs. There may be lone alphas out there, and the one you are meant for could be looking for you.”
“Wait, let me get this straight,” I said. “You’re saying that I should mate to another man—a stranger—within three weeks?”
“It may seem extreme, but it’s for the good of the pack,” said Neil.
I shook my head. “But then what happens to Judah?”
“Judah is lost to us,” said Henry. “I know you think you can get him back, but that is foolish.”
Three weeks? To make a commitment to another man that I didn’t know? No, I didn’t want that. My whirlwind courtship with Judah had proved disastrous. I couldn’t do that again. I couldn’t expect that it would possibly go well.
From now on, I was going to trust myself and do what I thought was best. I hadn’t thought it was a good idea to attack the bloods’ headquarters, but I’d let Judah sway me. That hadn’t turned out well. I wasn’t going to let the council sway me.
“I can’t mate away Judah’s pack from him,” I said. “I can’t betray him that way.”
“He would have to understand,” said Neil. “He was captured by vampires. He’s as good as dead.”
“No, he’s not,” I said. “Listen, I may have a way that I can get to him. My sister was at our village last night. She saved me. If I contact her, maybe I can find a way to free Judah.”
Neil and Henry exchanged a look.
“Your tie to the vampires was meant to be an advantage to the pack,” said Henry. “I don’t know. Perhaps it’s all possible.”
“Good,” I said. “Unfortunately, I left in a hurry. I didn’t bring my cell
phone with me when we fled the village. I’d have to go back.”
“We have phones here,” said Neil.
“Yes, but I don’t remember her number,” I said. “Also, I need the number of my friend Sinead. She lives with Vivia, and she can ask if a spell tying into the bond of Judah and Tempest can work. If I shift and run, I can be back here by noon today.”
“You haven’t slept. You haven’t eaten,” said Mary.
“There’s no time to lose,” I said. “And I did get some sleep before the attack on the village.”
“Well, you’ll eat something before you go anywhere,” said Neil.
* * *
After a hearty meal, I shifted immediately and went back to the village. Ewan accompanied me, along with Amber, in case there was any trouble. We had a list of other things that pack members wanted us to retrieve for them. Nothing big, of course. Things we could carry in packs on our backs in wolf form.
We were wary upon arriving, afraid that the place might be under surveillance by the bloodhounds. But when we approached, we didn’t smell anything. Even still, we didn’t want to spend much time there, because we were afraid that they might be coming back. Perhaps they were checking back on the village every hour or so. We couldn’t be sure.
The place was a husk of itself. Many of the buildings had collapsed. Many were still smoking. Most of the fires seemed to have gone out, and the flames hadn’t spread to the surrounding woods, which was a miracle in and of itself. But the place could be rebuilt. I could see the potential there, and I hoped that we would find a way back to our home.
I found my phone and then helped the others collect what we could collect.
As we were about to leave, we heard the sound of a car in the distance. There was a road that led up to the village, but the streets themselves were generally only traveled on by foot. The few cars that the pack owned were parked outside the village.
We hid.
But we watched.
The car pulled up to the entrance to the village and the door was forced open. I was astonished to see Sinead get out of the car.
A Symphony of Howls Page 19