by K. C. Crowne
My heart ached, and part of me wanted to stay. Utah State had an art program, and I could get a scholarship there too. But Declan had reminded me, “How many artists do you know that went to a state school? No, you need to go somewhere big, somewhere respected, and in a city where art matters.”
New York was where I needed to be.
Even though it hurt us both, he still pushed me toward my dreams rather than hold me back, and it only made me want to stay by his side even more.
I turned to face him, standing on my tiptoes to kiss him. I was barely five foot three and he was a foot taller than me, but we always made it work.
His lips were softer than I ever imagined lips to be, and when he kissed me, he held my face in his hands. His big, rough hands were so gentle with me, and my insides turned to goo as I thought about those hands touching me in other places.
“I love you, Evelyn,” he said softly.
My heart fluttered and my eyes widened. “You...love me?” I choked.
“I do. I feel like I can finally tell you this now that we don’t have to hide anymore. I love you, and even though we’re going to be thousands of miles apart, I want to make this work.”
“I want that too, Declan,” I said, feeling a little lightheaded. “I love you too.”
He kissed me again, lifting my feet off the ground as if I weighed nothing at all.
The way Declan looked at me, I felt like the most beautiful woman in the world - and I believed it when he said he loved me.
“I’m ready, Declan.”
I had told him this - repeatedly - that I wanted tonight to be the night I gave myself to him, but I wanted to make it extra clear. I wanted him. The bulge in his jeans pressing against me made me think he wanted me too.
I reached for his pants, fumbling for the zipper when he said, “Stop.”
“What? Did I do something wrong?” My cheeks flushed.
“No, not at all. I just have something planned for you,” he said. “Follow me.”
He took my hand and walked me up to the loft in the barn and to a blanket laid out with some fairy lights strung up around the border. He walked over to a radio on the floor and pressed a button. Some cheesy, soft ballad began playing quietly.
“Our first time shouldn’t be on the ground,” he murmured.
“It’s beautiful,” I said with tears in my eyes.
He led me over to the big, plush blanket and sat down beside me, but I wasn’t sitting flat for long. I climbed into his lap, straddling his erection as we kissed. I took his hand and placed it on my breast, and that was all the permission he needed to explore my aching body with his hands.
I had been worried about this moment, worried about taking my shirt off. Would he still find me attractive when he saw all of me?
He lifted my shirt, and I didn’t fight it. I decided to be brave.
He gasped.
“What is it?” I asked fearfully.
“You’re just so beautiful,” he said, resting his forehead against mine. “And I love you so much.”
I kissed him as he removed my bra, though it took a few tries. My breasts fell free into his hands, and that was it. He saw me. All of me.
A sound made me jump.
“What was that?” I asked, looking around the dimly lit barn.
“What was what?” he asked.
Then I heard it again.
“Is that…laughter?” I asked. Before I knew what was happening, light flooded the barn.
“Good job, bro,” Tucker said, walking over to Declan as if to high-five him.
A flash caught my eye as Amy squealed with laughter. “Look at this dumbass! She really thought someone like Declan would want her.”
I jumped off Declan’s lap, tears stinging my eyes as more camera flashes blinded me.
“Evelyn, wait—” Declan grabbed for my hand, but I yanked free, frantically searching for my bra and shirt on the floor while also trying to cover myself.
“How could you?” I yelled.
“I didn’t— I don’t—”
I found my shirt and slipped it on as I rushed for the ladder.
Declan was right behind me, calling out to me. But so were Tucker, Carl, Amy and Jessica, and they had cameras.
“Look at her waddle away!” Amy screeched, laughing. “Waddle, waddle, fatty.”
“These photos, oh my God!” Jessica laughed as I reached the bottom.
I reached the bottom and ran out of the barn.
Declan was right behind me. “Evelyn, I swear I don’t know how they knew.”
I wanted to believe him, I did. But how would they have known to be up there, hiding in the hay bales, if he hadn’t told them?
“I never want to see you again,” I shouted as I walked toward the road.
“Evelyn, please. I didn’t know.”
He didn’t know.
No, he had to have known.
He was in on this the entire time.
This was the long con.
A boy like Declan would never be interested in a girl like me.
“Go to hell,” I said, hurrying away as quickly as I could.
I walked about ten minutes when I saw a car slowing down. Declan was no longer behind me. He wasn’t chasing after me anymore. He had given up.
Just as I had.
I was so done with this town.
The car stopped and I recognized it. Dad’s car. I froze in the darkness, fearing the worst. But when the door opened, I was relieved. I rushed forward, the tears falling from my eyes.
“Matt!” I cried out as I ran into my brother’s arms.
“What’s going on, Evelyn? Declan called me and said to get out here fast but didn’t say why.”
“I don’t want to talk about it. I just want to go home.”
“Okay, sure,” he said, guiding me to the car.
Only a few more days and I was on a flight to New York City. I’d never have to return to Liberty, and after that night, I no longer had a reason to visit.
Chapter 1
Declan
Fifteen Years Later
“Your meeting has been pushed back fifteen to twenty minutes, Mr. Wilde.” Ashley, my assistant, poked her head in my office. “Ezra’s meeting with the client ran a bit late. He’s headed back now.”
“Thanks, Ashley.”
“Oh, and you also got a call from Eli Harvey,” she said. “You were on the phone, so I took a message for you.” Ashley walked over and put a post-it down in front of me.
All it said was, He found her.
My heart thundered in my chest, then my palms grew sweaty.
Ashley stared at me for a moment and then cleared her throat. “I know it’s none of my business, but may I ask, who did he find?”
I’d forgotten she was standing there for a second. Looking up, I said, “An old friend. Someone from high school that I lost touch with years ago, and I’ve regretted it ever since.”
Ashley shot me a knowing grin, but she didn’t say what she was thinking. I was grateful for that. Nor did she ask any more questions.
“I’m calling Eli back now,” I said, giving her the hint that I needed some privacy.
“Oh, right, of course,” she said, ducking out of the office and shutting the door behind her as she left.
I picked up my phone and dialed Eli.
“Hey, man,” he said when he answered the phone.
“So, you found her?” I asked, feeling bad for avoiding small talk or pleasantries, but my mind was on only one thing.
“I did. It was a little challenging because she changed her name and built an entirely new life for herself. Sounds like she didn’t want to be found.”
“Changed her name?” That’s why I couldn’t find her on Facebook or anywhere, for that matter. As far as my search went, there was no sign of Evelyn Palmer after she left Liberty High School. It was like she had disappeared for good; I couldn’t even find records of her at NYU.
Now I knew why.
“Ye
s, she goes by Eva Stone now,” Eli said.
“Eva Stone? Why does that name sound familiar?”
“Because she’s kind of famous, man. Just look her up and you’ll see what I mean.”
I opened my laptop and did exactly that, typing in her name. A flurry of articles and links loaded onto my screen, and I clicked on her Instagram.
“Holy hell… that’s why I couldn’t find her before,” I mused.
She hadn’t disappeared; Evelyn had reinvented herself. From her name to… well, essentially everything.
I scrolled through her posts quickly. “Are you sure this is her?”
“Positive. When I called her assistant and asked for Evelyn Palmer, she was confused at first and said no one ever called her that anymore and correctly assumed I must be an old friend. But she essentially confirmed it for me.”
My mouse hovered over an image of a dark-haired woman with porcelain skin wearing a floor-length red gown that perfectly matched her red lipstick.
Was that my Evelyn?
I clicked on it, enlarging the photo, and even through all the glamour makeup, I recognized those grey eyes and her beautiful smile.
“Declan, you still there, man?”
“I am.” My voice came out, but it didn’t sound like my voice.
“Checking her out online, huh? She’s a beauty. And successful too. Seems she did well for herself after she left Liberty.”
“It seems she has.” I’d always known she was bound for great things. “Good for her.”
“I’ll send you the phone number I have for her, though you’ll have to go through her assistant. Good luck with that.” Eli chuckled and we said our goodbyes. I thanked him for his work.
She was okay. That was all I wanted to know. After that night at my barn, I’d never seen her again. She hadn’t even shown up to graduation, and her brother, my best friend at the time, wouldn’t talk to me. I’d never known what happened to Evelyn, but now I did.
That should have been enough for me, but it wasn’t. I needed to apologize for that night, even after all these years.
Eli texted the phone number, and I stared at it for a long time, the image of Evelyn still on my computer screen.
I remembered the girl with the space buns and the band t-shirts. This woman was definitely the same person but wearing a designer gown. Her hair was sleek and silky, falling to her shoulders. I couldn’t even recall seeing her wear makeup back then, but now she looked like a model.
Thankfully, she hadn’t lost her curves, which were shown off in the form-fitting dress. A perfect hourglass. High schoolers couldn’t appreciate curves like that and often made fun of her, but by grown-up standards, she was a stunner.
And she could have been mine.
That was so long ago, Declan. Who knows what would have happened if you’d stayed together, I reminded myself. She was going off to NYU while I was staying in Utah and going to a state school. Could we have lasted through the distance and everything that came with growing up? Who knew? But it didn’t make the ache in my heart better to think about it. Especially knowing how things really ended.
There was a knock at the door.
“Come in.”
Liam and Clark, my fellow business owners and close friends, walked into the office. Liam plopped down across from me and stared at the screen with a cocked eyebrow.
“Who’s that?” he asked.
Clark sat down, leaning in closer for a better look. He let out a low whistle. “She’s a hottie. I’d remember her if I ran into her.”
“She doesn’t live here,” I said, closing the laptop screen. “She used to, but she left after high school.”
“No way, man… Is that—” Liam’s eyes were large.
“Yeah, it’s Evelyn. After your little stunt, it got me thinking… Maybe I should try to find her. But she’s no longer Evelyn Palmer. She goes by Eva Stone now.”
“Eva Stone? I think one of our clients requested some artwork by her.”
“Yeah, that sounds about right. She’s an artist.”
Liam let out a low whistle. “And to think, I thought that woman I found on Facebook was Evelyn. Had I found the real one, I might have stood a chance at beating you.”
The guys and I had made a bet. Our friend, and Clark’s stepbrother, Mike had a car he was willing to give the last guy who remained single. A Camaro, but not just any Camaro - a car that we’d grown up coveting and wishing for since we were teens. A couple weeks prior, Liam thought he would try to knock me out by finding my high school love, but he’d found the wrong one. He was very wrong, in fact, but it had spurred me to look into finding her after all these years.
“So you decided to find her after Liam’s stunt, huh?” Clark shot me a knowing look. “I knew you would go out fast, Declan.”
“Come on, Eva Stone? I’m sure she’s already with someone, and even if she’s not, she’s a New York socialite. I’m an architect in Liberty, Utah. We aren’t going to end up together, and I’m still in for the car, Clark. I won’t go out that easily.”
Clark shrugged. “We’ll see about that.”
“What did you two want anyway?”
“Ezra just got back, said we’d meet in your office since you have the plans in here and it’ll be easier.”
Another knock on the door and Ezra entered, followed by Mike.
“The whole gang is here,” I said, eager to change the subject.
But Clark wasn’t going to let it go that easily. “Declan is going down. I called it first.”
“What are you talking about?” Ezra asked, pulling a chair over to the desk.
“He’s reconnected with Evelyn. You know the girl he never got over from high school—”
“I got over her.” Even I knew it was a lie, and the way the guys looked at me told me they didn’t really believe it either. “It’s been fifteen years. And I haven’t reconnected, I just found her on Instagram. I haven’t sent her a message or anything.”
As soon as I said it, though, I knew it would be nice to do. I could send her a message, see how she’s doing. Nothing too serious. After all, she was in New York and I was in Utah.
Mike - the person who started the bet – joked, “Well, I’m just impressed you outlasted Liam, so if you go down now, I’d still call it a win.”
“Hey now…” Liam interjected.
“It’s true. No one predicted you would fall so fast,” Clark said. “I’m still disappointed.”
Liam shrugged, but he couldn’t stop himself from smiling. Because he was in love and even though the guys liked to give him crap about it, it was clear he was happy. He’d found his person.
And even though I’d never admit it out loud, part of me was jealous.
But I had done the dating scene long enough to know that I was done. Too many games. It was better if I stayed single and showed them all that I wasn’t the weakest link.
I wouldn’t just beat Liam; I’d beat them all. And I would win that car.
While the focus was on Liam, I pulled out my phone and searched for Eva’s Instagram. While they were bantering about the next person to go down, I typed out the message.
Hey there. Not sure if you remember me, but I just want you to know that I’m so proud of you. Your life looks amazing, and you’ve finally gotten everything you deserve. I’m happy for you and always knew you could do it. I’d love to talk to you and explain what happened that night, and to apologize for everything. If you’d like that. If not, I respect that.
“Alright, can we just get this meeting started?” Ezra asked, tired of the banter. He was always so serious, and I could trust him to call the meeting to order. I slipped my phone into my pocket, trying to push out all thoughts of Evelyn.
After all, she had a new life.
A better life.
And she likely didn’t remember me, or if she did, they weren’t good memories.
It hit me though… She might not check her social media. She might have a person for that.
I looked at the message from Eli and decided to take my chance with her assistant.
“Eva Stone Enterprises, this is Lily speaking.”
“Hi Lily,” I said, speaking softly even though the office door was closed. I had debated with myself over and over about whether I should make this call, but I gave in. I told the guys I wouldn’t reach out to Eva, failing to tell them about the message I sent and keeping this call a secret too. I gathered my courage and took a deep breath before continuing. “I’m an old friend of Evelyn’s— err, I mean Eva’s. We went to high school together, and I was hoping to reconnect.”
“May I get your name, please?’
“Yes, of course. Declan Wilde.”
“And a number where she can contact you?”
I gave her my number.
“Mr. Wilde, I will pass the message on to Ms. Stone, but please understand she’s a busy woman and may not be able to return your call.”
“I understand, but is there any other way I can reach out to her? I also sent a message to her Instagram, but I wasn’t sure if she will get it.”
“I manage her social media and will pass along your message there as well.” Her tone took a more serious turn, and that’s when it hit me that I likely sounded a little bit like a stalker.
I wondered how many other people from her past called and messaged her…probably a lot. She was fairly well-known, and surely a lot of roaches came out of the woodwork to try and connect with her now. I kicked myself for coming off that way.
“I really appreciate that.”
“I’ll pass it along, Mr. Wilde. Thank you for your call.”
I cringed as she hung up. It’s been fifteen years, Declan. Most people don’t care about their high school boyfriends or girlfriends after fifteen years. Evelyn and I had only dated for a couple weeks; she probably felt nothing for me, and I was stupid to even care this much.
But through all these years, the guilt had weighed on me, and I couldn’t live with it any longer.
I needed to apologize.
She deserved that from me.