by Quinn Loftis
“I’m not crazy,” Myanin said matter-of-factly.
“Yes you are.” Tenia walked over and held out her arm. “Anyone who tells you differently is straight-up lying to you.”
Myanin placed her hand on the fae’s again and shrugged. “I’m working on myself. I can’t fix everything all at once. Crazy might have to be the last thing I fix.”
Tenia snorted. “Great.” Then they flashed.
When they appeared in the queen’s chambers, Lilly was standing with her back against the wall. It was obvious she’d decided she would not be caught unaware again. Myanin had texted her about thirty minutes ago.
“You’re late,” the queen said as she looked down at the phone in her hand.
A second later, Myanin found herself pushed against the wall with a fae blade pressed against her throat. A small but very powerful fae—Perizada, she presumed—glared at her.
“Peri, you agreed to hear her out,” Lilly said, sounding much too bored for Myanin’s liking. Myanin wasn’t actually afraid of the high fae. Though it was apparent by the woman’s power that she was ancient and actually more powerful than Myanin. Which she found interesting considering Myanin knew she herself was more powerful than Alston. Was Perizada actually more powerful than Alston?
“I’m having second thoughts,” Perizada said as the blade pressed tighter. If Myanin had her throat slit by a fae blade, there would be no healing. She would be well and truly screwed. But then, isn’t it what she deserved?
“Do what you must,” Myanin said, her voice soft as she met the high fae’s eyes. “It is no less than I deserve. And I have made things right with my Creator.” Myanin heard a door open and close, but she didn’t take her eyes off the woman who held the blade. There was a deep rumbling and then what sounded like two males, because the grunts were too deep to be female, struggling.
“Peri, let her go,” a deep guttural voice commanded.
“Just because we’re mates doesn’t mean I agreed to take orders, wolf,” the high fae said as her icy gaze continued to stare into Myanin’s eyes.
“You know me well enough that I would never attempt to give you an order, female. But I’d really rather not have to hurt Gerick,” said the male, presumably Perizada’s mate, who was apparently a wolf.
“Why on earth would you have to hurt Gerick?” the high fae asked, still not moving her blade away.
“Because he is currently attempting to get to you,” the male said.
“Hmm,” Perizada purred. “Interesting.”
Myanin’s brow rose. “More interesting than your blade at my throat?”
“Possibly,” the high fae smirked. “You are only alive because Lilly says we can trust you. The second I have a single doubt about that, your flesh will know the sting of my blade, and it will be the last thing you ever feel.”
Myanin lowered her eyes. “I appreciate the opportunity to prove Queen Lilly correct.” She said the words calmly, but her magic was attempting to crawl from her body. What the ever-loving hell? Myanin’s magic was her own now as the Great Luna had removed all traces of Lyra, for which Myanin was grateful. Why was it behaving so strangely?
Peri’s words helped Myanin refocus on the blade at her throat and not on her magic, which seemed to be acting crazier than her for once. “For Lilly’s sake, I hope you do. It would break her heart if she realized she put her faith in the wrong person and brought a wolf in sheep’s clothing among her people.”
“Interesting choice of words, considering,” Myanin said as she clenched her fist at her sides in an attempt to keep her power from dripping from her fingers. Whoever had entered the room and was wrestling with Peri’s mate, Myanin’s power wanted him. Badly.
Perizada smirked and finally pulled her blade away. “The Great Luna seems to have a sense of humor when passing out mates. She deemed it only fitting that I have a wolf for a mate, considering how much they get on my nerves.”
As she stepped back, an enormous male appeared at her side. “I love you too, mate,” the hulking man said.
“I am Perizada. You may call me Peri, unless there comes a day when you no longer have the right. This is my mate, Lucian.” She motioned to the big werewolf.
Myanin bowed her head to both of them. “I am Myanin. And I understand why you distrust me.”
“Thadrick and I have never really gotten along,” Peri said. “He’s an ass. But he’s become a member of the pack that stands as one against the Order. Hurt one of us, you hurt us all.”
Myanin’s heart squeezed tightly in her chest, but it wasn’t because of pain related to Thadrick, at least not because she had wanted him and didn’t get him. This time there was an ache so deep that it threatened to take her breath because he was a part of a group that genuinely cared about him and what happened to him. They would miss him if he was lost, especially if he died fighting against what the Order stood for. They would celebrate his life even as they mourned his death. Who cared if Myanin or Tenia died? No one in the Order, that was for sure. They were simply tools for the Order to use.
“I am glad he has people who care for him,” Myanin said, as she struggled to keep her voice strong. She wanted them to accept her, to be a part of something good. The djinn also really wanted to know what the hell was up with her power because it felt like a ticking time bomb about to go off inside of her. She didn’t need to appear crazier than she already came across, which, according to Tenia, was pretty freaking crazy.
“Really?” Peri asked. “Because your actions would suggest otherwise.”
“Peri.” Lilly sighed. “Must we really go through all of this again?”
“She has a right to ask,” Myanin said, forcing herself to focus on only Peri. This woman was who she needed to convince. Myanin had to make Peri see she was changed, not by her own strength, but by the Great Luna’s. This time her voice wavered. She felt the sheen of tears that wanted to fall. There was something terrifying about bearing your sins before others, but also freeing, as if you’d been holding your breath, hoping no one would find out. But once you’d confessed, you could suddenly suck in a breath of life-giving air.
“Damn right I do,” Peri snapped. “If you were a Canis lupus and pulled the shit you did, they’d have killed you on sight.”
Myanin nodded as the first tear fell. “And rightfully so.”
“Why shouldn’t I kill you?” Peri’s voice was full of challenge, but she would get none from Myanin.
“I have no reason. And I won’t stop you if you try.” The resolve in her voice might have made it sound like Myanin wanted to die, but she didn’t. She’d accepted that it was most likely her future because her actions had led her to this end. The djinn didn’t know if she could truly be okay with herself, even if others could forgive her. She wasn’t sure if she could ever forgive herself.
Suddenly Tenia stood between Peri and Myanin. She must have flashed because one second she wasn’t there and the next she was. “You’ll have to kill me first, Perizada,” Tenia said, even as she bowed her head. “I’m sorry, but Myanin is my friend.” Her voice wavered a bit as if she was on the verge of tears, though Myanin couldn’t see the fae’s face. “I don’t agree with what she’s done. But she is remorseful, and she wants to make amends for her actions. She’s a little creepy and says weird things, but I’ve known you a long time, Peri, and you are kind of similar. Nobody’s killed you yet.”
“Not for lack of trying,” Lilly muttered.
“Queenie.” Peri’s voice dripped with warning.
There was a long pause. Then Peri spoke again. “It is good to see you, Tenia.” The high fae’s voice was much gentler as she spoke to Tenia. “You look a little worse for wear, but otherwise all right.”
“It is good to see you as well. But I still cannot let you kill Myanin,” Tenia said, her voice firm.
Myanin swallowed as another tear fell. She didn’t deserve Tenia’s loyalty, and yet, the fae was standing up for her. Once upon a time, she’d had friends that cared
for her, but would they have stood up for her the way this fae was, knowing what she knew? “Tenia, it’s all right,” she mumbled.
“No, it’s not.” Tenia shook her head, vehemence in both her action and words. “You’re my friend. The Great Luna has given you a chance to prove yourself. Perizada, powerful though she may be, does not get to challenge the goddess’s decision.”
“As much as it irks me,” Peri said through gritted teeth. “Tenia is right. Stand down, Tenia. I won’t hurt her.”
Tenia didn’t move.
“I give you my word. Unless Myanin does something that proves she isn’t working with us, I will not harm her,” Peri promised.
Myanin tried not to give herself even the slightest bit of hope, but she desired it desperately. She wanted a chance to prove herself. Her hands fisted at her sides, and her nails dug into her palms. Sweat dripped down her back beneath her clothes as she let Peri’s words play on repeat in her mind. “I won’t harm her.” The high fae had every right, as an upholder of the supernatural law, to run her blade across Myanin’s throat. Yet she’d stayed her hand. After several tense minutes, Tenia finally moved to the side. But then Lucian stepped forward, and the fae froze.
He frowned as his eyes narrowed on Tenia. “Why do you smell like Skender?”
“Mother of pearl,” Lilly muttered from behind Peri and Lucian.
Before Tenia could respond, a man, nearly as large as Lucian—though not a wolf, based on yellow eyes with the classic warlock vertical slits up the center—stepped up on the other side of Peri, directly in front of Myanin. If she could have taken a step back, she would have, but there was a wall holding her in place. The intensity of his gaze was enough to make a shiver run down her spine. Her magic lunged so hard that Myanin grunted as it tried to jerk her closer to him. Down girl, Myanin snapped as she felt her body and magic respond to a male in a way it had not in a very long time. She frowned and then considered it again. Had her body and magic ever responded this way to any male, even Thad? The answer was no.
“Gerick?” Peri asked, her voice sounding unsure for the first time since she’d arrived. She glanced from the warlock to Myanin.
So this was the male Lucian had been struggling with, the one he hadn’t wanted to hurt. And this was the reason her magic was reacting so strongly. Actually, now that Myanin considered it, her magic was reacting like a female draheim in heat. Hmm, interesting indeed. Myanin couldn’t pull her stare from his, no matter how uncomfortable it made her feel. The scrutiny in his eyes wasn’t judgmental. Even though it made her want to squirm, it was curious.
The male in question stepped closer until the tips of his shoes were nearly touching the tips of her own. He was taller than her by at least six inches. Myanin didn’t have to tilt her head back to look up at him, but she had to raise her eyes. He was handsome, she couldn’t deny that, even with the strange yellow eyes. His face was chiseled, and his hair was dark and not quite shoulder length. The warlock had full lips and long, dark eyelashes. He could have been considered pretty if he wasn’t so masculine. Gerick leaned even closer, and Myanin wasn’t sure what to do.
Part of her wanted to hide because the shame inside felt like a blaring alarm screaming “murderer” when people looked at her. Another part of her wanted to beg him to never stop looking at her. She wanted to ask him what he saw when he gazed at her. Does he see what I once was? Or what I am now? And the much less shameful part of her, that seemed to be strongly linked to her magic, wanted to rub up against him and ask him if he liked it. She internally groaned. Fantastic, she wasn’t just a creeper, but a horny creeper. As she stared up at Gerick, the ache inside of her deepened. She knew this male was important to her. It wasn’t an emotion she understood, but she would bet her life on it. This warlock, this Gerick, was someone who was going to change her life.
“Mate,” he said, just as she finished her own thought. “You’re my mate.” He seemed confused by the revelation, as if maybe he shouldn’t know it with such certainty. Yet he did. His eyes and mouth showed his resolve. He didn’t back away in horror or shake his head as if he was disappointed. If anything, he gazed at her in awe.
There was a string of curses by multiple voices behind him. All Myanin could do was stand there and blink like a damn idiot. No words would leave her mouth. Hell, she didn’t even know if she was breathing. The word “mate” reverberated off the inside of her skull. It wasn’t possible. There’d never been a mating between a djinn and a warlock. Ever. As in, never ever.
“That’s not possible.” Myanin finally managed to get her mouth to move. Her voice was softer than she’d ever heard it.
“A couple years ago it wasn’t possible for a wolf to mate with a fae,” Peri said from behind Gerick, “and yet, here we are, one big, happy supernatural orgy.”
“Peri,” Lucian growled.
“What?” Peri growled right back. “I’m irritated. You know how I get when I’m irritated.”
“When are you not irritated?” Lilly asked.
“Not now, queenie,” Peri said. “Your general is being tempted to the dark side by djinn cookies. You might want to pay attention.”
“Actually, it’s cotton candy,” Lilly said. “The dark side has apparently traded up from cookies.”
Gerick still stared at Myanin as if she were a mystery, and he wasn’t sure how to solve her. She wasn’t doing much better. In fact, she didn’t know what the hell she was supposed to do. It was becoming a familiar feeling. At one point in her life, she’d known where she stood. She’d known her role. Now, after everything she’d done, after all she’d seen and experienced, she had no clue where she belonged in the world anymore.
“I don’t understand,” Gerick said, his voice deep but gentle.
“Welcome to the ways of the Great Luna,” Peri said.
“I don’t know you, Gerick, but if it makes you feel any better, I just found out that I’m mated to a werewolf who’s loyal to the Order,” Tenia said. “So, it could be worse.”
“I’m not aware if that’s a compliment or not,” Myanin muttered, her eyes fixed on the male in front of her. She wasn’t sure what she thought he would do, but paying attention seemed prudent, considering he, too, seemed utterly fascinated with her. Myanin attempted to convince herself she wasn’t nearly as fascinated by him. But she knew that was a losing battle. Not to mention her magic, which had apparently decided that Gerick was her new favorite flavor of cotton candy, was trying to get a taste by switching on every nerve ending in Myanin’s body. The air around her seemed electrified, and her magic wanted to follow the currents directly to Gerick’s body. Get a damn grip, female. Myanin mentally chastised her magic. She’d never felt it react this way before.
“Is that why I smell Skender’s scent on you?” Lucian asked Tenia. “It is faint but still there.”
“It was faint because he only touched me twice, and it was brief,” Tenia said. “He’s guarding the door where my young is being held,” she explained. “He swore to me he would protect my son with his life. Can I trust him?” Even with her focus on Gerick, Myanin could hear the desperation in Tenia’s voice.
Lucian didn’t answer right away. As Myanin waited to hear how the wolf would respond, Gerick’s hand lifted and reached toward her face. Call it a knee-jerk reaction, and perhaps an overreaction because the djinn didn’t understand her magic’s response to him, but Myanin slapped his hand away. “No touching,” she said, her voice sharp. To her surprise, instead of being offended, Gerick’s lips turned up in a small, crooked smile that was much too sexy for her liking. She let out a shaky breath and pulled her shoulders back.
He finally took a step back and moved to the side so she could see the rest of the room, but his eyes stayed on her.
“Skender is telling the truth,” Lucian finally answered. “A Canis lupus male does not turn on his true mate. Can you hear his thoughts?”
Tenia nodded. “But I’ve been trying to keep him blocked.”
Lucian chuckled.
“How’s that going for you?”
Tenia glanced at Peri. “Are they all this annoying?”
Peri nodded. “Unfortunately. It doesn’t matter whether they’re on the good team or the bad team, wolves are wolves.”
“His accent was like yours,” Tenia said as she looked back at Lucian.
“He was a member of the Romania pack,” Lucian said.
“Was?” Tenia said, her voice thick with emotion. “No longer?”
Lucian nodded.
The understanding was written on Tenia’s face. “So, he betrayed his pack.”
Lucian grimaced. Something like pain or sympathy appeared in his eyes. “I’m sorry, Tenia. Unfortunately, Skender has made a lot of bad decisions lately.”
“Lately?” Peri coughed. “That’s being generous. He’s been making terrible decisions for the better part of a year. He faked having a true mate for fu—”
“PERI,” Lucian snapped before she could finish her sentence.
Myanin saw the pain in Tenia’s eyes. She walked over to the female who’d been willing to stand between her and a high fae. Myanin bumped Tenia with her shoulder. It was as close to a hug as she could manage. Her magic was acting so weirdly, she almost worried it would try to grope Tenia. She didn’t need groper added to her list of none-too-charming personality traits.
“I’m sorry,” the djinn said gently. What else could she say? “It sucks your mate is a lying mutt who deserves to be castrated” seemed a bit inappropriate at the moment. Not to mention, she was still wrestling with her own inner turmoil. She deserved death, expected death, but wanted life. And now she was being slapped in the face with a warlock mate, who’d screwed her magic up so badly she was ready to quit being a warrior and become a temptress. The solid ground upon which Myanin had built her life was no longer firm. And she was shaking right along with it.
Tenia shrugged, and her shoulders slumped forward. “I never expected to have a mate. Why should I be disappointed? I have lost nothing.” But the fae’s face revealed she didn’t believe a word she was saying.