“I’ll do that,” he said, shaken.
“Do not do anything with it that might annoy the Sorceress. She is phenomenally dangerous when angry. Do you understand?”
“Yeah, I think so. Don’t use her the way Grandpa did.”
“That’s it. Best not to touch it at all. We can wrap it in cloth for you to carry.”
“But she said to animate her again, after I showed you. I said I would.”
His mother winced. “Oh, damn! It’s a trap.”
“A trap?”
“If you don’t touch her, and return her wrapped, the doll may be angry, and will tell the Sorceress that you molested her, and there will be an almost literal hell to pay. But if you animate her again, she’ll seduce you, and that may also annoy her mistress. We’re damned either way.”
“But she seems so nice! And she knows I’m just trying to do the right thing.”
“You always try to do the right thing, Tumble. But sometimes it can be difficult to know what is right.”
“Yeah.”
“All right. Animate her, but don’t use her. Tell her what I said, and hope she is reasonable.”
“Yeah.” He put his hand on the doll’s arm.
Epiphany manifested immediately. “No need to tell me, Tumble. I heard.”
“You’re not mad?”
“I’m not mad. You mother is a good woman. Tell her I said I’d treat you right.”
“Pip says she heard, she’s not mad, and will treat me right,” Tumble relayed.
“You’re talking to her now?”
“Yes. I know you can’t see her, but she’s right here. We’re holding hands.”
“So she can hear me.”
“I can,” Epiphany agreed.
“She can.”
His mother faced where she judged Epiphany to be. “My son’s a good boy. He wants to do what’s right. But he doesn’t always know what’s right. Please, if you have any conscience, let him deliver you safely to the Sorceress, and tell her the truth about what happened here. We didn’t know the old man was keeping the doll. I beg you, as a loving mother.”
“I can’t swear to that,” Epiphany said. “But I can tell you this: neither I nor the Sorceress wishes you or your village any ill. We shall see how it resolves.”
Tumble relayed her words. His mother relaxed only slightly. “Then we shall simply have to hope for the best.”
“Yes.” Epiphany leaned forward and kissed her on the cheek.
“Oh! I felt that!”
“I can make others feel me when I try,” Epiphany agreed. Then she turned to Tumble. “Time for bed, I think.”
“Bed,” he agreed.
His mother winced again, but did not comment.
Tumble returned to his bed under the eaves. They were staying in his grandfather’s house while they shaped it up for sale, and this was where there was room for him. But he hesitated to strip to his underclothing, because of Epiphany’s presence. “Maybe I should let you be the doll, for the night.”
“Oh, no you don’t. I’ve been asleep for so long I want to live a little. I’ll share your bed.”
“But—”
“Your mother’s afraid I’ll seduce you.”
“Yeah.” It would hardly be difficult; her very presence aroused him painfully.
“And that will anger the Sorceress.”
“Yeah.”
“Let me make this clear, Tumble. If you force yourself on me, my mistress will be angry. But if I choose to seduce you, she won’t. She just doesn’t like me to be abused.”
Tumble was sorely tempted, but wary. No girl had ever made such an offer, let alone as ravishingly lovely a one as this. But was it right? He was pretty sure his mother would not think so. “I wish Grandpa could advise me now.”
“You were close to him?”
“Sometimes. At least he taught me three things.”
“Oh? What are they?”
“First, to appreciate beauty wherever I might find it. Second, how to fight off thugs. Third, always to do the right thing. He said the third is where he failed, but with luck I’d be a better man.”
“I think Trevor knew you’d find me.”
“Maybe. I’ll sure try to do what he said.”
Epiphany considered, then brought her face close to his. “Trevor gave you good advice. I will try to let you follow it.”
“That’s nice,” he said uncertainly. “I was afraid you were going to kiss me.”
She laughed. “I am going to kiss you. Then I will leave you alone for the night, except for maintaining our contact so I won’t revert.”
“But if you kiss me, I’ll—” He couldn’t say what, because her very nearness was stirring his emotions phenomenally.
“You’ll sleep. This time. That’s part of my magic.”
“I don’t know. If—”
She kissed him. He felt as if he were floating to the ceiling.
Then it was morning, and he woke refreshed after dreaming endlessly of that kiss. He feared he loved her already. Had she bewitched him?
She seemed to read his thought. “No, Tumble, I merely put you to sleep. Your own nature did the rest. You are a healthy young man with a normal appreciation of the feminine form.”
“I guess you could have, if you’d wanted.”
“Yes, I could have seduced you, and I did want to, but I’m trying to play fair. I’m giving you your chance to deliver me to my mistress. But I can’t guarantee my future behavior.”
“Thanks, I guess.”
She laughed. “We’ll see.”
After breakfast they set off for Bleak Mountain, which was not far, but the path was rugged. It would be a half-day’s walk.
Unfortunately two village toughs were passing by. When they saw Tumble, they cut across to intercept him.
“Oh, darn,” he muttered. “Pip, I’m going to have to let go of you, because I’ll need to deal with these bullies. Otherwise they’ll take you, and you’ll never get home.”
“I can do a little enchantment, enough to mess them up long enough for you to pass.”
“No, thanks, I should handle my own problems, if I can.”
“As you prefer.”
He brought out his handkerchief and took hold of her other arm, then let go of her hand. She reverted to doll form. He held her close to his chest and walked on.
The toughs stood athwart the path, blocking his way. “Hey Tummy Dummy!” one said. “Whatcha got there? You playing with dolls now?”
“I have to return it to the Sorceress.”
They peered closer. “That’s some doll! Looks sexy as hell. Look at those gams! We’ll take it.”
“No.”
“We don’t much like that word, Dummy. We’re asking you nice. Hand it over or we’ll pound you.”
“No.”
The bullies smiled. Now they had a pretext to pound him. One reached for Tumble while the other reached for the doll.
Tumble’s left hand was free. He swing it forward and out, suddenly and hard. The knuckles of his fist cracked into the bully’s face so hard that blood spattered. Then Tumble ducked down and launched his right shoulder into the gut of the other. The air went out of him and he went down, gasping helplessly.
Tumble walked on. After a moment he touched the doll.
Epiphany appeared. “You weren’t fooling about handling thugs!”
“Yes, when I have to. It’s only the one thing, that I have drilled on hundreds of times, so I’m not clumsy.”
“But they’ll be lurking for you when you return, and wary about sucker punches.”
“Yes. But I couldn’t let them take you.”
They moved on. Beyond the village there was a field of wild flowers. Tumble paused to gaze at them admiringly. “They’re so beautiful. I always like them.”
“And Trevor taught you to appreciate beauty.”
“Yes.”
“Tumble, what would you do if you had all power in the world and could do anything at all
?”
“Oh, I have thought about that! I’d help all the villagers in need, except the bullies, and make nice paths lined with flowering trees, and I’d try to perk up Bleak Mountain.”
“Bleak Mountain!”
“I think it’s called that because the Sorceress may be unhappy and doesn’t take much care of it. But maybe if it had some nice trees and rivers and butterflies, it would perk her up.”
“You’d try to make the Sorceress happy?”
“Yes. She’s a person too, even if she is centuries old. If she could look out on a really nice natural scene, she should be happier. Anyone would. Wouldn’t you be happy if the castle were nicer?”
She was thoughtful. “Yes, I suppose I would be.” Then she came up with another question. “Tumble, if you could have any woman in the world you wanted, whom would you choose?”
He laughed. “That’s easy. Just one who honestly loved me. I wouldn’t care about her shape or age or anything. All I want is to love and be loved and have a nice family.”
“That’s so sweet.”
He shrugged. “It doesn’t matter. No girl ever liked me. None ever will.”
“But a smart woman might, if she really got to know you.”
“Maybe. But I’m not holding my breath.”
“Tumble, I’m really getting to like you. I may be only a doll, but I think you’re a very nice man, and I’d truly like to make it with you before we reach the castle.”
“Make what with me?”
She smiled. “I love your naiveté, too. I’m talking about making love. Sex. I’d like to seduce you, at least once. I promise you rapture such as you have never known or even imagined.”
“But if you seduce me, I won’t want to turn you over to the Sorceress. I wouldn’t be able to make myself do the right thing. I’m weak, but at least I know my weakness.”
“Your weakness becomes you, Tumble.”
He shook his head. “I don’t understand that. I only know I mustn’t do it with you. It would—it would violate my honor.”
“That’s true. You would be no better in that respect than your grandfather Trevor was. He was a good man, but he couldn’t resist that particular temptation. But Tumble, maybe I’m worth it. You could keep me the way Trevor did, and park me in a box between times. I’d be a whole lot of fun.”
He was sorely tempted again, but knew it wouldn’t be right. “I have to do the right thing. That is to return you to the Sorceress.”
She made as if to turn down her halter. “Don’t you like me?”
“I like you too much, Pip. I know you’re only a doll, but you’re really pretty and you seem like such a nice person. But I have to do what I have to do.”
“You are so steadfast,” she said sadly.
“What would you want, if you could have anything?”
“Me? I’m only a doll. It’s not my place to want anything.”
“But if you could?”
She glanced sidelong at him. “What do you think I would want?”
“To be alive and free, not needing to cater to any man any more.”
“But Tumble, I like catering to men. It’s my prime entertainment.” She paused, considering. “Still, it’s a fair question and deserves a fair answer. I think I’d like to be valued for more than just one thing, my evocative and obliging body. To—well, as you said, to truly love and be loved. And have a loving family. I’ve never had that.”
“I wish I could give you that.”
She squeezed his hand tenderly. “I wish you could too. You’re the first person who ever asked me about my preferences.”
The path became steep. Tumble was panting by the time they reached the front portcullis of the castle. “I guess this is good-bye,” he said.
“Not yet. This time I’ll do the seductive kiss.”
“But—”
She cut him off with the kiss. His whole body reacted with the power of it. His arms clasped her involuntarily and his desire seemed overwhelming.
But he fought it off. “I wish—oh how I wish!” he gasped. “But I mustn’t. I promised to return you, and I must not break my word.”
She frowned, her anger flaring. “You’re a fool.”
“Yeah,” he agreed miserably.
“Then put me down on the floor inside the castle and let go.”
He stepped through the gate, holding her. “I hope the Sorceress gives you freedom at last, so you can be happy.” His eyes were burning with tears. “I love you, Pip. Even when you’re mad at me.” Then with a superhuman effort he put her down and let go. He felt as if his universe were imploding.
But the doll did not reappear. Epiphany continued to stand there, untouched.
He blinked, trying to clear his vision, but the doll was not there. “I don’t understand.”
“Tumble, it is time for you to know the rest of it,” Epiphany said. “The trial is over. You have succeeded in doing your duty. I am more than satisfied.”
“Why haven’t you changed?”
“Tumble, you said you love me. Would you still love me if I were more than a magic doll?”
The truth was easy. “Yes!”
“Considerably more?”
“Yes. But—”
“I am more. I am the Sorceress.”
He was amazed. “You? But—”
“I assumed the doll form so I could anonymously get to know different men. Between-times, while the doll slept, I handled my regular business, alone. I like you, Tumble. Like you a lot. I believe I will marry you.”
“But I’m not handsome, strong, smart, or rich! I haven’t even finished cleaning out the attic.”
“I can grant you all these things, in abundance.” She smiled briefly. “I’ll even help you with the attic. But here’s the point: What I can’t magically give a man is integrity. You are the first in a century to actually turn in the living doll.” She stepped up to him, taking him by the shoulders, gazing into his eyes. “I know I can trust you, Tumble. You will do the right thing regardless of temptations or threats. That’s what truly counts.”
“But—”
“Tumble, it’s been a long dry spell. I have decades of passion backed up. I never got enough from the doll, though I relished what I did get. I simply had to find the right man. You are that man. Please, come to my bedroom. I promise to do the right thing by you, after. I will always look exactly as I do now, unless you come to prefer a change, and will always do my best to make you happy. I have potency spells galore if you ever need them. Your mother will be pleased to see you gainfully married. We’ll tour the world. We’ll help all your villagers. We’ll have children, a loving family. We’ll make Bleak Mountain beautiful. Anything you want, as I know you won’t abuse it. But right now I just have to make love to you. It’s all right, now that you know me and we have a relationship. I’m on the verge of loving you, in my fashion, and that is an extremely rare and wonderful thing for me.” She brought her lovely face closer. “Please.”
He could not get a handle on his feelings. “But—”
She frowned prettily. “Unless you have a thing against older women?”
“No! I don’t care how old you are. I love you! It’s just so much, so sudden. You were just a doll in the attic. Now you’re—”
“A woman almost in love.”
“Mother would be wary of my taking up with a—a strange woman.”
Her pupils came to resemble the fiery mouths of two volcanoes. “Not half as wary as she would be of an angry Sorceress.”
He was alarmed, knowing her power. “Please don’t hurt my mother!”
She was instantly contrite. The pupils became two placid love pools. “I wouldn’t think of it, dear. I’m just saying that I’m sure she will be reasonable.”
“I—I can’t tell you no. But I don’t know what to do. I have no experience. I’d be clumsy. I don’t want to—to turn you off.”
“Fortunately I have experience also, in quantity. I will guide you.” She took a breath. �
�Tumble, I have proposed marriage to you. Do you accept?”
What could he do? He was overflowing with desire for her, and sex was only part of it. “Yes. If it’s the right thing.”
She smiled. “It’s the right thing, Tumble, and it’s only the beginning.” Then she kissed him, and won him, completely.
Note: I wrote this on request in August 2011 and it was published in March 2012 in Attic Toys. The requirement was simply that the story relate to something found in an attic. I have a huge file of ideas that I summarize and save for when needed, and I delved into this and found this idea of an artifact that needed to be returned to a Sorceress. An item that is more than it seems. It came together nicely, and this is one of my favorite stories of this volume, vying with “Juliet.” I love the way the Sorceress tempts Tumble, and the way he unknowingly wins her by his honesty and appreciation for ordinary things, like maybe flowers for Bleak Mountain. I like the way the pupils of her eyes show her moods, whether volcanoes or love pools. Not that the average reader will notice; some details are simply because I like them.
Caution: religion
19. Religion
I am agnostic, with no belief in the supernatural. When they first told me about how Santa Claus flew through the air and delivered presents to every child on Earth on the same night, I was skeptical: No Way. Then they told me about God, sitting on the edge of a cloud, looking down, pointing to different folk to select which ones would go to Heaven and which to Hell. I was similarly skeptical. That was the beginning of a lifelong disbelief; I never joined any religion. Today I am a Humanist, which I regard not as a religion but as a sensible philosophy of life. But it’s a matter of definition. If you define God to be Truth, Honor, Beauty, Decency, Love, Intelligence, Empathy, and Realism, then you can say I believe. But I see little evidence that religious folk define God in that manner, or even practice the tenets of their own holy books. Rich Christian conservatives do not give all their money to the poor as Jesus recommended; devout Muslims do not practice tolerance; practitioners of the great Asian religions do not eschew war. I am a vegetarian because I don’t like hurting animals; how many religious folk follow the “Thou shalt not kill” commandment, even if it is limited to people? None who support war, abortion, or the death penalty. How could any religion ever justify the horrors of the Inquisition? So I am uncertain whether religion is a net benefit to mankind. I’m not against religion; I have been married to a minister’s daughter 55 years. I am merely in doubt. But I do dislike the way God is put on our currency, in the Pledge of Allegiance, and in legal oaths; these are supposed to be civil, not religious matters.
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