“You’re leaving?” she says in my ear. I can hear the sadness in her words.
I pull back and look at her. “No, not at all.”
“I thought that was a goodbye hug.”
I pray that it’s not. That it never will be, because my heart is nestling itself inside this family and if something happens and I get pushed from the circle, I don’t know what I’ll do. The more time I spend here, the more attached I become and the more they accept me. I’ve even had a few positive encounters with Frank. I can’t help but wonder, if Logan and I take things too far and it doesn’t work…
I stand and lead Belle from the room. “Let’s see if we can help them get dessert ready.”
When we walk into the kitchen, Lou and Bud are all puffy cheeks and squinty eyes, and she has her hand on his arm. I give her a sidelong glance like a parent catching teens making out. She throws her hands in the air. “Oh heavens, dessert.” She jumps up and sticks her head in the fridge. “I know, I can be a little ditzy…a tad scatterbrained, a forgetful Fran, a—”
“Lou!” I interrupt, reaching for the glass pan she’s pulling out. “It’s okay.”
“Ooh, chocolate.” Belle’s eyes twinkle.
“Not too much,” Bud says and Belle’s beam dims a bit. “It’s late.”
We each have a small piece of Lou’s delicious chocolate pudding creation with Oreo sprinkles on top. As much as I truly enjoy the time with them, I’m getting tired of answering Belle’s endless questions while watching Lou and Bud flirt like I wasn’t there.
“Maybe we ought to head back,” I say as I pick up the pan to put it back in the fridge.
Just then the door pops open with Logan carrying a sleeping Colton over his shoulder. The image makes my uterus vibrate like the needle on the Richter scale. I try to act casual, though I am in his kitchen holding a glass baking pan like a wife waiting on her man. Our gazes catch each other, and his says he’s just as happy to see me as I am him.
“Where’s everyone else?” I ask.
“Dad decided to stay the night in LA with the boys.” He walks through the kitchen toward the hallway. “I need to get this little lump to bed.”
“He have a good time?” Bud asks.
“Most happy I’ve seen him in a long while,” Logan whispers before stepping into the hall.
I give hugs and goodnights to Belle and Bud, and then he takes her off to bed, leaving Lou and I to gather our things. Typically, I’m not here so late but I find myself stalling, not wanting to leave without getting to see Logan one more time.
“Do you want to ask that man candy for a ride home so you can stay?” Lou takes the dish from me and puts it back in the fridge.
“Of course, not. I just…well, I thought you wanted to tell Logan about the lasagna.”
“Mm-hmm.” She nods and gives me a look like she’s calling me out. “Bud knows how to re-heat it. Are you going or staying?”
“Good. You’re still here,” Logan says, returning to the kitchen.
Flutters begin in my stomach and float to my heart. Ever since he told that guy he was my somebody—no matter how undefined that term was—I look at him with stars in my eyes. Something I didn’t want to happen. Then with this whole “perks” thing, I can’t seem to keep my cool around him. And the heat I’ve been feeling is the kind that makes you stupid. I feel like I’ve been bouncing all over the place. One minute pushing up on him and flirty, the next holding back.
Another case in point of my stupidity—my blunder at the gym. It’s rare I let myself get that far without noticing the signs. I’m an independent woman, dealing with a disease that affects my daily life, trying to be responsible and help a family survive after loss, and all I can think about is his lips against my neck while sliding his hand up my thigh.
“Is that so?” Logan shoots me a sultry look.
Clearly, I’ve missed some of the conversation during my internal monologue. “Sorry, what was that again?” I’m looking at Lou because somehow, I don’t trust Logan not to mess with me.
“I was just telling Logan that you’ve been waiting for him.”
“What? No…I was asking you if we should wait because—”
A cocky smirk lifts one corner of Logan’s mouth, stopping me mid-sentence.
“Shut-up,” I tell him even though he didn’t say a word.
“You two obviously need to clear up this confusion so I’m going to go.” Lou picks up her purse and pulls out her keys. “Logan, you can take Mollie home, right?”
“Happy to. And thank you so much for going to all the trouble tonight.” He opens the door for her and gives her a hug.
I’m glaring at her but more out of embarrassment because I’m truly glad to have some time with Logan.
“Are you hungry? I ask when he shuts the door. I try not to look at him but when I head to the fridge, he grabs my wrist.
“Starving.” He pulls me back to him, against the wall that is his chest. His other hand snakes under my arm, coming up to the back of my neck before he leans down to kiss me. It’s hard and greedy and literally takes my breath away. I try to pull my wrist from his grip, but he holds me tighter so I use my other hand to run my fingers through his hair, pulling his mouth harder against mine. Then his lips soften, and he leaves me with a few light kisses before pulling back. “Want to go to my room?”
The question alone causes heat to spark and spread through me. But as much as the offer tempts me, I don’t want to take this too far too fast. Not to mention he lives in a full house with little ones wandering around. “Logan…”
He’s still holding my wrist with one hand and now his other hand has joined it and is playing with my bracelet. “I want to be with you, Mollie. But not here, like this. I just want to spend some time alone with you since you’re here.” Smiling, he dips his head, and I instinctively bring my lips to meet his. I nip their fullness as he strokes my wrist, and I imagine him continuing his exploration as I lie under him.
“Okay,” I whisper but wonder how the hell I’m supposed to stop this when it feels so good to keep going.
I let him lead me to his room, and I feel like I’m in high school, sneaking into my boyfriend’s bedroom. “Wow, nice room, Greg. When do Peter and Bobby get home?”
He gives me fake angry eyes as he plops down onto the bed. “What, not enough purple for you?”
“Yeah, actually.” The décor, if you can call it that, consists of tans and browns. There’s not much in terms of personal items like it used to be a guest room.
“This was my old room but everything got packed away when I left. Since I didn’t know how long I was going to be here, I haven’t done anything with it.” He scoots up and over, leaning his back against the pillows. “You gonna sit? I’ve got Netflix. Wanna chill?”
“Funny.” I crawl up next to him and lean my body into his solid frame as he clicks on a small TV, which rests on the shelf of his bookcase. It’s the most comforting thing I’ve ever felt. I might be able to handle not being naked with him if he’d wrap his arms around me and hold me like this all night. “So why didn’t your dad and brothers come home?”
He gently brushes my hair out of my face. “There was some dirt bike thing tomorrow. Ryder’s way into X games stuff.”
“I thought he was into this whole gladiator thing you’re doing.”
“He is. Pretty much anything adventurous or dangerous, he’s into it.” He pauses and looks thoughtful, maybe even a little sad. “Actually, he used to do a lot more before his mom died.”
“Is that why you agreed to try out for that show?”
“That’s part of it. It means so much to him.”
“And what does it mean to you?”
“It means, I’m doing something besides being a manny.”
I tap his chest with the palm of my hand. “You have to know how important you are to this family.”
“I guess. So anyway, Dad let them beg for a while to stay in a motel and go tomorrow, but I think he said yes
to try and make up for the last few months.”
“I think that’s great. It’ll be nice they have some special time together.”
Logan puts his arm around me, pulls me in closer. “Special time sounds good to me.” He rubs up and down on my arm, his thumb just grazing the side of my breast. He’s barely touched me and fire ignites deep in my center.
Before I can decide it’s a bad idea, I set my hand down on his thick thigh and rub up and down. When I look up into his eyes, I see the heat. The wanting. He kisses me softly and whispers into my mouth. “I want you so bad it hurts.” He presses his parted lips to mine and slips his tongue inside my mouth. Sensual and hot, his mouth devours mine until I’m panting and have to pull away. He snuggles into my neck as I slow my breathing and peppers me with soft kisses. “Damn, you smell good.” His hot breath against my ear sends me spiraling, and I arch my body into him. He slips and arm around my waist and rolls half-way on top of me. “Tell me to stop,” he says, “before I ravage your body.”
Chapter 17
Mollie
Stop? Yes, we should stop.
The only light in the room is coming from the flickering television, which has been muted this whole time.
“Logan,” I respond breathlessly. “Stop…making me so…hot.”
He cups one of my breasts through my shirt.
I clutch his broad shoulders. “Stop…making me want you so badly.”
He runs his hand down the length of my body to my ass and squeezes.
I wrap a leg around his waist, and then…he brushes his lips right into the side of my cheek as if he knows my face so well, he knows the exact spot of my dimple without me smiling. Damn. “Sto— Don’t. Stop.” I’m practically panting and about ready to wrap my other leg around him when I hear a door open in the hall and tiny footsteps.
We freeze. Lock eyes. Wait. Logan gives me the softest kiss on the lips and then mouths, little feet.
“Is the door locked?” I whisper.
“No,” he whisper-laughs.
I give him a mini punch in the arm. A toilet flushes before we hear more footsteps and then silence.
“Should we go to your place?”
The short reprieve has given me a moment of clarity. My body obviously went on autopilot and was ready to fly off into the sunset with Logan. But as much heat as there was between us, I felt something much stronger. I’m not sure either of us is ready to stomp that out with sneaky sex in his family’s home.
“Your delay is disturbing,” he says, rolling off me and staring at the ceiling.
I turn on my side and face him. “Logan…” He turns his head in my direction. “I think it was pretty obvious what I wanted no matter what I’m about to say.”
“No perks?” he says with a purse of his lips.
“Um, if those weren’t perks, we were doing something wrong.”
He turns on his side and leans up on his elbow. “The perks were incredible. I want more. I want it all and I think you do too.”
“All?” I cock my head.
“Not just sex, Mollie. All of you. You’re not a perks kind of woman. You’re too good for that. I want to be all in with you.” He takes my hand, kisses my fingertips, melting my heart in the process. “You in?”
And once again he asks me a simple question with a complicated answer—just like that day in the hospital cafeteria. I sigh because it’s exactly what I want, but there’s still so much between us. So much we should talk about. “I’m scared,” I say honestly.
“About what?”
“Too much. Honestly, I feel safer sticking with the perks.”
He furrows his brow. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
I hesitate because if I bring up his family, he might take it wrong.
“Just tell me,” he prompts. “You’ve done nothing but be there for me, help my family… How can I be upset at you for sharing your feelings?”
I take a deep breath and decide to lay it out on the table. “I’ve always been sort of a loner…”
“’K. Any other confessions to reveal?”
“Stop. I’m serious. This huge family of yours, being a part of it, is all new to me.” I look down at our joined hands. He’s playing with my bracelet again, but I can’t get sidetracked with that right now. One issue at a time. “And you…and your family are all I seem to think about.”
He lifts my chin so I meet his gaze. “That’s a good thing, Mollie.”
“It is good. And bad.”
“It’s only bad if you think I’m going to screw up this good thing you’ve got.” He releases my hand and sits up. “I get the picture now.”
“I don’t think you do. It’s not that I don’t have faith in you.” I sit up beside him. “Maybe I’ll be the one to screw it up. Maybe we’ll find we just aren’t meant for more than friendship. Maybe once we find out more about each other—” I stop myself before my emotional rambling goes off in the wrong direction. “It’s just…really tough for couples to find their way back to friendship when it doesn’t work out. I know this sounds really selfish of me, but honestly, it’s just one layer to the onion. It’s cliché, but it’s complicated and you know it.”
He turns and looks at me, pleading. “So, the odds aren’t great. Haven’t you ever taken a chance? You said yourself this is all new to you. Keep going. See what more life has. Let me—us—be a big part of that.” His words don’t match the defeated look in his eyes. Like he’s given in but letting me know it hurts him.
“Hey, I’m not saying no, Logan.” I run my hand down the side of his face. “I’m just saying that we should take it slow. Spend more time together that is not about the kids. Get to know each other better. Neither of us has willingly shared that much of ourselves.”
He nods but doesn’t say anything.
“Are you up for that?” I ask.
He nods again, takes in a deep breath, and sighs it out. “Yeah, I’m up for whatever gets me you.” He leans in and places a soft kiss on my lips and lingers there. “I want to know everything about you,” he says against my lips. After lingering a moment longer, he pulls away and gets off the bed.
“What are you doing?” I ask.
“Taking off my pants.”
“Um…” As much as that excites me, I’m confused. My wide eyes narrow on him. I move to the edge of the bed and face him while he unbuttons his pants. I’m speechless as I watch his fingers pull down his zipper.
“You want to know me?” I hear him say as he drags his jeans over his hips and down his thick thighs.
“I want to know everything about you,” I answer and force myself to pull my focus from the snug blue boxers that hug his rippled thighs back up to meet his dark brown gaze. Understanding comes over me at the look in his eyes. I scoot and he sits on the edge of the bed next to me.
He slips his shoes off and pulls his jeans all the way off and then removes his shirt, before standing once again.
“You need your shirt off for this?”
“You wanna see the whole package, don’t you? Besides I’m not standing her in a shirt and my underwear. It’s all or nothing.”
I hide a smile but it quickly fades when I see his broad, cut chest rippled with muscles and illuminated by the light of the TV. Muscles I’m pretty sure were there before he was injured but are likely bigger now. He sidesteps until he’s right in front of me, my gaze almost eye level with his chest, and I start to doubt my resolve to take things slowly. I run my hands over the ripples and then down his hips, across his taut thighs, and down to his knees. He’s the sexiest man I’ve ever laid eyes on, and I wouldn’t change a thing about him. He lifts his right leg, placing his prosthetic leg and foot on the bed.
“Touch it,” he says. “Might as well get used to it.”
“So, you…keep it on—during?” I ask hesitantly. I run my hand over his knee and down the length of the prosthesis.
“Whatever floats your boat, baby.”
I know he’s making light of it to mas
k the awkwardness. But it also shows me how much I mean to him if he’s willing to share this part of himself.
Without a word, he reaches down and presses a metal piece that looks like a button and I hear a slight click. He pulls off the apparatus and sets it on the ground. Still standing, balancing, he removes the first layer of material.
“That’s the silicone liner with the pin in the end that goes into a socket in the prosthesis,” I say.
He looks at me and I dip my head in a nod.
“Exactly. I should have realized you don’t need the ‘how to’ part.”
After he sets that piece aside, he removes another material liner. His leg goes down just past his knee by an inch or so. I’ve seen amputated limbs plenty of times in my work so nothing about this fazes me. I place my hand at the end of his leg and gently rub a few times before trailing my hand back up toward his thigh. I lift my gaze back up to his. “Yeah, so?”
Logan leans over and places his hands on my thighs without so much as a hop to steady himself. He presses down with some of his weight but keeps his eyes trained on mine. “I’ve got great balance…with or without it.”
I skate my hands along the corded muscles of his arms, over his shoulders, and to his face. Just touching his close-cropped beard turns me on. “I bet you do.” We share a smile of understanding. “Any other benefits I should know about?”
“I can deadlift more than you weigh so…”
His suggestion brings an image of him holding me with my legs wrapped around his waist. “Nice.” I clasp my hands around his neck and pull him closer, covering his mouth with mine. Our tongues brush against each other, my pulse quickens, and all I want is to feel the weight of his body pressing me into this mattress. I lean back, pulling him with me until we are lying back on the bed.
His lips move to my neck and down to my collarbone. I weave my fingers though his hair, wanting to lead his kisses to every spot that’s calling to him. My whole body is humming for him, and just when I consider throwing in the chastity towel, he turns his head to the side and rests it on my chest. Our bodies move with our breathing, rising and falling deeply together. I caress his head, and he does the same to my hip. I may have tried to make this moment playful, but my eyes blur with tears. I’ve never felt this close to another human being in all my life. I’m speechless but also afraid to ruin it with some lame words. And I’m surely not going to state the obvious and tell him how his leg makes no difference to me. I will show him that in due time.
Building Bridges (Bridges Brothers Book 1) Page 14