by L. J. Hamlin
“I’m really sorry they were like that. They haven’t tried to get in contact at all over the years?” Jed asks. He still finds it so hard to believe that parents, families, just turn on their children, walk away from them.
“Not that I know of. And I’m on Facebook and stuff. I wouldn’t be hard to find. I don’t think they’re ever going to come looking though.”
“They’re the ones missing out, not you. Because they sound like assholes, and you’re awesome. Just think: you’re famous now. You’re living your dream, and they’re probably still the same douches they were back then,” Jed says, trying to make Donnie feel better.
“I know, logically, that my life is better off without them. They were so controlling. They were never happy with me or the way I was living my life. Not just being bi—they had a problem with everything I did. Leaving gave me the freedom to live on my own terms, but it still sucks, you know, when someone who’s meant to love you just doesn’t.” Donnie looks away as he speaks, and Jed can tell this is hard for him.
Jed kind of understands. Bert was supposed to love him, but as soon as Jed didn’t take his side in a band discussion, that was it, the beginning of the end. Bert had been developing a habit, heavily using cocaine, and it had got to a point where it was affecting his playing. Confronting him as a band hadn’t gone well. They’d asked him to get help; he’d told them to go to hell. He’d walked away from the band, and then less than a week later he’d sold his story about his and Jed’s relationship to the papers. Not exactly the action of someone who loved him.
“It’s sad when people disappoint you,” Jed says softly.
“Yeah, that’s a good way to describe it. I expected better of my family, even though I probably shouldn’t have.” Donnie shrugs and looks back at Jed with those bright blue eyes of his.
“Did you bring pictures along of anyone? I know Penny said she was going to tell you that we all do. It helps when you’re feeling off,” Jed says, wanting to get on to safer ground. He’s pissed off at Donnie’s family, at all the families that do the same thing to their kids, and he doesn’t want to think about Bert’s betrayal.
“Yeah, Penny suggested it, and I did. They’re in my bunk.” Donnie smiles faintly.
“So are mine. Want to compare? You don’t have to if they’re personal,” Jed suggests.
“No, they’re not too personal. Yeah, let’s compare,” Donnie says, standing up. Jed does the same. They both go to their bunks and retrieve their photos, and then they return to the couch.
Jed sits down closer to Donnie, telling himself it’s just because he wants to give Donnie a better view of the photographs in his hand. But really, he likes being close to Donnie. He stirs something up inside of Jed. It’s a little confusing. Jed’s never been so taken by someone so quickly, and Donnie isn’t even trying to get his attention. He just has it.
“You might like this one. It’s me and the band years ago.” Jed holds out the picture. It had been taken at a concert not long after Cherry Lee had joined the band. They’re years younger, and they look so happy.
“That’s awesome. You should tweet that at some point. You guys look great. Your fans would love to see a behind the scenes pic like that,” Donnie says with a smile.
“I’ll share one of mine, if you post one of yours. If there are any of people you can post?” Jed asks.
“There’s this one of me and Kelly. She won’t mind me posting it.” Donnie holds the photo out to Jed, and Jed takes the picture.
He’s seen pictures of Kelly since Donnie joined the band, but he hasn’t met her yet. She’s younger in this photograph, and so is Donnie, and it’s Donnie who really captures his attention.
“So your hair wasn’t always fire engine red? I like the green,” Jed says, staring at the picture. In it, Donnie’s hair is just past his shoulders. He looks happy, his arm hooked around Kelly’s waist, a hoop in his lower lip that’s gone now. Jed glances at Donnie’s mouth. The piercing didn’t leave a scar.
“I liked the green, too. But I think this red is my favorite. I have a thing for hair colors not found in nature.” Donnie grins, tugging lightly on a long strand of bright red, very much unnatural hair.
“How old were you here?” Jed asks, still looking at the photograph. Donnie looks fresh faced, youthful in the photo, like he probably still got carded for beer back then.
“Eighteen. Me and Kelly had just moved into our first apartment.” Donnie smiles faintly.
“You two are really close,” Jed says softly. He’s glad that Donnie had someone at that age, that even though he didn’t have family, he had friends.
“She’s my best friend. Meeting her changed my life. She’s got pink hair now. It was white blonde then. I always worried I’d get a crush on her because she’s such an awesome woman, but luckily I don’t fall for every pretty girl I meet, or I’d be screwed.” Donnie laughs.
They show each other the rest of the pictures. Jed feels a little bad for showing Donnie the pictures of his family, but Donnie doesn’t seem upset by them. He smiles and asks questions. Donnie’s pictures are of his friends, and one large group shot of everyone at the charity he works for. Jed can tell when Donnie talks about it that it’s very important to him.
After they finish going through the photographs, they both take the best picture they can on their phones and post them to Twitter.
“I’m finding it really weird that I have so many people following me on Twitter. I have fans. That’s weird as hell.” Donnie shakes his head.
“But cool, right?” Jed asks. He knows the limelight isn’t for everyone, so he hopes Donnie can handle being in a band that’s so very much in the public eye.
“Very cool. I try and answer a few tweets each day, but I get so many, it’s kind of mind blowing. I don’t really get why they want to listen to what I have to say.” Donnie seems genuinely surprised. It’s kind of cute.
“Of course you have a lot of people wanting to hear what you say. You’re a young, hot, bisexual guitarist. That makes you catnip to girls and boys all over the world. And you’re a sweetheart. People are bound to like you.”
He’s seen some of the attention Donnie’s been getting. It’s mainly been positive, and a lot of it has been teenagers throwing themselves at him. So far on the tour, Jed hasn’t seen Donnie respond really to having women and men throw themselves at his feet. He’s polite, but he’s not taken any of them up on their offers.
“Hot bisexual guitarist? I should get that on a business card,” Donnie jokes, blushing slightly, like maybe he’s not used to being complimented. Which would be a crime. Someone so amazing should be told each and every day how awesome he is.
“I’ll get you some,” Jed says. They keep talking, till Jed feels his eyelids starting to droop, and then he reluctantly heads back to his bunk. Jed isn’t surprised when he dreams of Donnie. He’s not sure what to think about it, but it happens.
Jed finds himself having several late night talks with Donnie over the next week. So when they return to California, he’s disappointed. Tonight they won’t be on the bus. He won’t get to talk with Donnie before bed. Jed will be in his house tonight, and Donnie will be in his apartment.
He tries not to think about it as they go out to sign. He’s crossing the street from where the car left them, as there were too many fans to park on the other side, and now they have to walk to get to the fans, when he hears Donnie yell his name. Jed turns to look—just in time to see the blur of a car and a security guard barreling into him.
He sees the flashes of cameras going off, and then his head hits the sidewalk hard, and all he sees is darkness.
Chapter 5
Donnie is still on the other side of the street when he sees the car. It’s speeding right at Jed. He yells, knowing he has no chance of getting there in time. He yells again, and he’s never been gladder to see a security guard. The guy launches himself at Jed, knocking him out of the path of the car.
The car doesn’t stop. It just kee
ps going. People are screaming; cameras are flashing. Donnie tries to go to Jed, to see if he’s all right, but there’s security everywhere, and they herd the protesting band back into the building they’d come from.
The band is forced into a room to wait, while everything is chaos. Finally, Jamie appears to tell them what is going on.
“Is Jed okay?” Brenton asks.
“He bumped his head on the way down and hurt his leg, so they’re taking him to the hospital to check him out. I’m going to go with him. Obviously, the show is cancelled tonight. Security is going to take you all home,” Jamie explains.
Donnie’s relieved that Jed isn’t seriously hurt, but he’s still worried.
“Did the cops find the car? What the hell was that?” Drew asks.
“They found the car, but no driver. And they think the car was stolen.” Jamie sighs, and for the first time, Donnie can see the strain on her face. She’s worried too, really worried.
Donnie doesn’t even care that she doesn’t like him. In that moment, he wants to hug her. The only reason he doesn’t is because he’s damn sure it would be unwelcomed.
“What’s going on? Was someone really trying to kill him?” Penny’s voice shakes, and Donnie goes to her, puts his arm around her, and pulls her into his side. Penny leans into his hold, and it’s comforting to have her close.
“I don’t know. Maybe it was a joyrider who lost control, someone who’d been drinking. I don’t know. But I’m making sure he has security at the hospital,” Jamie replies.
“If Donnie hadn’t yelled…” Drew says softly.
“I know. This was a close call. I’m going to go. I don’t want Jed to be alone. Stay safe, everyone,” Jamie says, and then she’s off, out of the room. Donnie wishes he could follow her. He wants to see Jed, to make sure he’s okay with his own eyes.
Security leads them all to cars. Donnie hugs Penny goodbye and gets clapped on the back by Drew and then Brenton.
“You did a good job, kid. You probably saved Jed’s life tonight. None of us will forget that,” Brenton says.
“I just got lucky, seeing the car when I did,” Donnie replies. Penny hugs him once more, and Donnie gets in the car.
It still feels weird to be driven places, but Donnie’s glad for it tonight. He doesn’t think he could concentrate on driving right now. They take him home, and a security guard even walks him to his door. Clearly they’re taking no chance that tonight was some sort of strike against the band.
“What’s going on? Why are you home so early?” Kelly asks as Donnie walks inside. She’s on the couch, watching TV.
“You haven’t seen anything on the news or the internet yet?” Donnie asks. He kicks his boots off and goes to sit with Kelly.
“No, what happened?” Kelly asks.
“A car almost hit Jed,” Donnie says, and tells her what happened. He still can’t believe it.
Donnie finds it hard to sleep that night, so Kelly stays with him on the couch, watching TV, checking Twitter to see what people are talking about. Eventually Donnie falls asleep in front of the TV. The next morning, he showers and then is making coffee when he gets a mass text from Jamie to the band saying that Jed is at home. They’d kept him in the hospital overnight for observation, but he’s not badly hurt.
Donnie sends a message asking if it’s okay to come see Jed. Jamie doesn’t say no, but she doesn’t seem thrilled about the idea. Donnie sighs, staring at his cell phone.
“What’s wrong, princess?” Kelly asks, stretching out on the couch.
“I want to visit Jed to see if he’s really okay, but Jamie is staying with him, and I don’t think I’m welcome. I told you, she doesn’t exactly like me,” Donnie says, putting his phone down and adding sugar to his and Kelly’s coffee.
“You saved his life last night. You stopped Jed from being hit by a car. Surely that should have defrosted the ice queen a little.” Kelly frowns.
“I don’t think so. I don’t even know why she doesn’t like me. At first I thought I was being paranoid, but I know I’m not. Jamie doesn’t like me, and she doesn’t want me coming over to Jed’s place,” Donnie says, bringing their coffees over to the couch.
Kelly makes room for him, and Donnie sits down, carefully handing Kelly her cup of coffee and taking a sip of his. Even though it’s too hot, he needs the caffeine.
“So, she doesn’t like you, so what?” Kelly asks.
Donnie groans. “So she’s not just our manager; she’s his ex-wife and best friend. If I piss her off, it could ruin my friendship with Jed and my place in the band. I don’t want to lose that.”
“Well, from what you’ve said, she already doesn’t like you. If she was going to badmouth you to him, she probably already has, and Jed’s still your friend. So I wouldn’t worry about pissing her off,” Kelly says firmly.
“I don’t know.” Donnie isn’t sure. Jamie is a big part of Jed’s life, and she’s been a part of Jed’s life a lot longer than Donnie has.
“Are you really going to let some bitchy manager stop you from going to see your friend? Jed will be happy to see you. I mean, you saved his ass,” Kelly replies. She doesn’t take shit from anybody. She wouldn’t be scared to go over to Jed’s place, even with Jamie there.
But Donnie isn’t good at confrontation. He doesn’t do well with not being liked. He’s a people pleaser. So it’s hard for Donnie, having Jamie dislike him and not knowing why. If they’d fought, he could understand it, but she’s disliked him from the start.
“The last time I saw him, he was almost hit by a car. He was hurt. I keep seeing him on the ground. I want to know that he’s okay, see it with my own eyes. But, damn, I really don’t want to see Jamie.”
“Is she that scary? Come on, I know you’re brave. You can face a slightly pissy woman.” Kelly insists.
“I should go. I’m sure the rest of the band will. It’s not like I’ll be the only person to visit him. It won’t look weird, will it? It won’t make it obvious that I have a crush on him?” Donnie asks.
“No, it’s normal for a friend to visit their hurt friend. No one will suspect anything. Grow some balls, get dressed, and go see Jed,” Kelly says firmly.
“Fine. I’m getting dressed. If I make an ass of myself, I blame you.” Donnie gets up and goes to get dressed.
Once he’s ready, he kisses Kelly goodbye, then heads off to see Jed. He gets there in good time. Jamie doesn’t look pleased to see him when she opens the door, but she lets him in. Jed is in his family room, his foot propped up in front of him, bruising on his forehead.
“Donnie!” At least Jed seems pleased to see him. He goes to get up, and Donnie quickly puts a hand on his shoulder and stops him.
“Don’t get up. Jamie told us you sprained your ankle and you hit your head. You need to rest,” Donnie says firmly.
“You sound like Jamie,” Jed says, settling back as Jamie comes into the room.
“You do need to rest. I’m going to make a phone call, but I’ll be in the other room if you need anything,” Jamie says, and she sounds like she doesn’t trust Donnie alone with Jed or something.
“We’ll be fine. Go make your call. I know you’re fielding a lot of calls from the cancelled show and everything else,” Jed says, waving at his injuries.
“I’ll be right back,” Jamie says, giving Donnie an unreadable look.
“Take a seat,” Jed says, patting his couch.
Donnie sits down next to Jed, but he leaves a gap. He wants to be close to Jed, but he’s been good at holding back the urge. He feels better just being here, seeing Jed alive and relatively well.
“I want to thank you for last night. You saved my life,” Jed says softly.
“I got lucky. I think I heard the car accelerate or something. I looked that way at the right time. It’s the security guard who heard me and rushed to you who saved your life,” Donnie replies.
“I thanked him, too. But it’s thanks to you both that I just have a bump on my head,” Jed says, touc
hing his bruised forehead lightly.
“I’m really glad I saw the car when I did. And I’m glad security was so quick. That was way too close.” Donnie runs a hand through his hair. He still feels a little sick when he thinks of that car racing towards Jed.
“I’m going to tell the whole band, but I want to tell you first. I promised you I wouldn’t ask you to keep this kind of secret again, so I’m just…I’m going to tell you something, and I ask you to wait and let me tell the others, okay? I want to tell people to their faces. This isn’t a text kind of thing,” Jed says.
“You can tell me. I’ll wait. I won’t tell the rest of the band till you do,” Donnie promises.
“The car, they found it. And in the car, there was a note. The same note as before. Just the typed words ‘you will die alone’. There were no prints, no nothing,” Jed explains.
“So it was definitely the same person?” Donnie asks. He feels sick again. Someone tried to kill Jed last night. Someone wants him dead.
“The police believe a stalker may be trying to kill me, yes.” Jed says it like he’s not afraid. Maybe he’s not. Donnie would be, and he’s afraid for Jed.
“What are they going to do about it?” Donnie asks.
“They’re looking into it. And security is going to be tightened. We’re going back on tour in a few days. I won’t cancel,” Jed says firmly.
“Maybe you should get a bodyguard,” Donnie suggests. He knows it would be useless to suggest Jed put off touring till after this stalker has been caught.
“Jamie suggested the same thing. I’m not sure.” Jed sighs.
“I’m sure they can find you someone who won’t get in your way. I just…Last night was really close. You need someone between you and this stalker,” Donnie says. He’s worried about Jed. The idea of anything happening to Jed, it hurts, a twisting pain in Donnie’s gut.