by Donna Jay
“Good.” He ruffled her hair.
“Nonsense. She’ll be married with a home of her own long before then.” Nana Parker picked up her sherry glass then put it back down when she noticed it was empty. “I’d been married, had you, and widowed by the time I was twenty-three.”
And forever a spinster ran through Katie’s mind. She’d heard the tragic story of her grandad being killed on the railways when her dad was just a boy.
Apparently, it was around that time her nana’s hair turned white, and her one and only child became her life’s focus.
Her dad popped the tab on his beer, took a swig, and let out a mighty belch.
“Good heavens, Howard.” Her nana scowled. “Where are your manners?”
“It’s okay, mum, he’s only doing it to wind you up.”
Katie blinked. After all these years she still couldn’t get used to her mother calling her mother-in-law mum. It was just plain weird.
Her dad sat next to her at the table and nudged Katie’s elbow just as she was taking a sip of her drink. “Spill.”
She missed her mouth and wine dribbled down her chin. “Thanks, Dad.”
“You shouldn’t be drinking.”
“Says the boy who arrived home rolling drunk when he was sixteen and spent most of the night throwing up in the outhouse. Don’t think I didn’t know.”
Her dad’s eyes went wide. His mother slowly nodded at him as if to say, ‘that’s right, I wasn’t as blind as you thought, sonny.’
“More sherry, Nana?” Katie asked, enjoying this more relaxed side of her nana.
“Please.” She pushed her glass toward Katie.
When Katie went to stand, she didn’t get far. Her dad tugged on the hem of her shirt until she sat back down.
“You still haven’t told me your good news.”
“Remember the job interview I had last week?”
“Yep.”
“I got the job.”
“That’s fantastic.” He pulled her into a sideways hug, the scent of his deodorant tickling her nostrils. “I’m so proud of you.” He glanced at his mother and then his wife. “We all are.”
Her mum nodded, blinking back tears.
***
As soon as dinner was cleared away, Katie’s mother shooed her out of the kitchen. “Go put your fancy pants on. You promised your nana you’d show her your new clothes and your father’s yet to see you all dressed up.”
Now that the excitement of getting the job had faded, Katie dreaded being on show. She groaned. “Can’t I just bring them out and show her?” She sounded like a whiny brat, but her nana wasn’t one to pull any punches. If she made any snide remarks the tiny bit of self-worth Katie had would crumble at her feet.
“Honey, it’s just us.” Her mum’s eyes were full of love. “You’re a pretty girl, Katie, hold your chin high. Be proud of who you are.”
Swallowing the lump in her throat, Katie nodded. She could do this. She had to do this. As of next week, skirts, blouses, and low heels would be her daily attire.
In her room, she pushed play on her mixed cassette and when Neil Diamond started singing Girl, You’ll Be a Woman Soon the irony wasn’t lost on her.
A memory of her parents swaying together to the song warmed her from the inside out. She could only hope she’d find a love so deep one day.
For the time being, she put the pipe-dream out of her mind and concentrated on the here and now. She had a job, school was a thing of the past, and as Leo had said, being in the workforce would open up a whole new world to her.
After dressing, she sucked in her stomach and like on the day of her interview, held her head high.
Careful not to trip over her own feet—she was still getting the hang of wearing heels—she strolled out of her room, through the kitchen, and into the living room.
“Hot diggity dog. Look at you,” her dad’s exclamation made her blush.
“Doesn’t she look lovely?” Her mum directed the question at her nana.
Feeling awkward when her grandmother didn’t reply right away, Katie curtsied.
Her mum and dad grinned.
Her nana flicked some invisible dust off the broach on her cardigan. “You look lovely, dear.”
Then why do you look like you’re going to choke on your false teeth?
“Thank you, Nana.” Katie returned her tight-lipped smile and exited the room.
When she heard her father’s angry voice, she stopped outside the lounge door. Even though she told herself no good ever came out of eavesdropping, her feet refused to move.
“What was that all about, Mum? You could’ve been more enthusiastic.”
“I didn’t realise how much weight she’s put on until I saw her in a skirt.”
“Oh, come on.” That was her mum’s voice. “She’s not a beanpole like her brother, but she’s hardly obese.” A brief pause. “She looks…healthy.”
“It’s puppy fat,” her dad said.
Ouch. Pain stabbed at Katie’s chest.
The words—chubby, obese, puppy fat—played on a loop, spiralling her lower and lower.
“Have you met her boyfriend?” her nana asked, surprising Katie with the abrupt change of conversation.
“No. And considering how much she’s changed since the day she was late home from the river, if he showed his face around here, I’d kick his…”
“Howard!” her mum’s voice held a warning.
Seeming not to have heard the last part of the conversation, her nana replied with a comment that cut Katie to the core.
“I’m not surprised she hasn’t met anyone. No one loves a fatty.”
Not wanting to hear anymore, Katie kicked off her heels and bolted to the sanctuary of her bedroom. Her nana might dress beautifully, but no amount of pretty clothes could erase the coldness that clung to her like her stupid talcum powder.
Chapter 8
Monday morning, nervous anticipation made Katie bounce her foot up and down as she stared out the bus window. There wasn’t a cloud in the sky and despite the early hour it was already warming up to be a scorcher of a day.
Her mind flicked to the large glass windows blanketing the face of the office. Being a summer person, she looked forward to basking in the heat.
At 7:50 a.m. she rounded the corner to Fitzherbert Ave and was pleased to see a familiar face heading her way.
Smiling, Katie waited for Janet outside the double doors. Other staff members were already inside, setting up displays and putting money in cash registers.
“Hey.” Janet stepped up onto the pavement, dark brown hair bobbing around her shoulders.
“Did you walk, or have you got a car?”
“I caught the bus.” Katie smiled. A car was on the top of her to-buy list once she had an income.
“Okay, well that takes care of that. No need to show you where the staff carpark is just yet. Come on.” She stepped into the store and Katie followed.
To the right of the stairs, Janet pushed open a door to the ladies. The room was spacious with lockers, two toilet stalls, a hand basin and oval mirror.
“If you bring a jacket or umbrella or anything like that, you can store them in here.” Janet pulled a plastic lunch container out of her overstuffed backpack and shoved it into a locker with her name on it.
As tempted as Katie was to ask what was in her pack, she didn’t dare. It was none of her business. Although, standing there clutching nothing but her coin bag, she wondered if perhaps she should’ve grabbed a jacket on the off chance the summer day turned to shit.
They didn’t often get rain in January, but it wasn’t unheard of for the weather to take a turn for the worse.
An older lady bustled into the room, leaving the floral scent of perfume in her wake. Her eyes met Katie’s in the mirror on the wall and she spun on her heel. “You must be the new girl.”
“I am,” Katie said, feeling like she was looking at a replica of her aunty. Bottle-blond hair, blue eye shadow, long lashes, and a smile
that made everyone want to know her.
“Marjorie.” She held out a hand and Katie shook it. “I’m in charge of the wallpaper department.”
She turned back to the mirror, touched up her lipstick and disappeared as fast as she’d appeared.
“That was Marj.”
“So I heard.” Katie chuckled. “Is she always so...”
“Hyper?”
“I was going to say friendly, but I’ll run with that.”
“Wait ‘til you see her in action. She could sell milk to a dairy farmer.”
Once they put their bags in the office, Janet steered Katie through the back of the building
to the staff room. “Fridge.” She pulled the door open and deposited what appeared to be a salad in the plastic container she’d grabbed from her backpack.
“Did you bring any lunch?”
“I didn’t even think to,” Katie admitted, getting her first slap of reality. No more cut lunches made by her mother. No hanging around home with a fridge full of food to help herself to. Although, the latter could be a good thing as it meant no more bingeing either.
The thought buoyed her. She would even take a page out of Janet’s book and make a healthy lunch. With no other options, surely she’d lose a few of the pounds she’d gained.
Back in the office, Janet was in the middle of showing her how to operate the five-line PABX switchboard when the other woman Katie had spotted during her interview breezed into the office. “Hey, sorry I’m late.”
“Again.” Janet grinned.
Ignoring her, the woman looked at Katie. She had a warm smile, short cropped hair, gold hooped earrings, and appeared to be in her late thirties.
“I’m Hillary, and you must be Katie. Welcome to the team.”
“Thanks,” Katie said shyly.
“We call her money bags,” Janet said. “She counts the money and pays the wages. So, if you want to get paid, you have to be nice to her.”
Smiling, Hillary headed into her office.
The morning was a blur of phone calls, being introduced to various staff members as they came and went, needing change for their cash registers or seeking stationery. And a number of other tasks that would fall on her shoulders; typing, franking (stamping) envelopes, collecting and distributing the mail.
Leo kept a low profile, seemingly happy to leave Katie in the capable hands of Janet. “How do you feel?” Janet asked shortly before five.
Other than feeling like a third wheel at times when Janet and Hillary chatted about their personal lives, Katie felt happier than she had in a long time. She hadn’t meant to eavesdrop, but she’d learned Hillary had two teenaged daughters, and Janet who was only a few years older than her was currently single after dumping some douchebag. Her words.
“Brain dead but good,” Katie finally replied.
“That’s what I love about going to the gym,” Janet said. “It wakes me up. Turns the brain off and kicks the body into gear.”
“How long have you been a member?” Katie asked, excited by the prospect of joining.
“Three months.” She gave Katie a proud smile. “I’ve lost half a stone so far.”
Katie did the math. Seven pounds in three months seemed like a reasonable goal. If she could do the same, the weight she’d gained would be a thing of the past within a few months. “How much does it cost?”
Chapter 9
October 1986
The next eight months flew by. Her work colleagues were a great bunch of people, her mind was constantly stimulated, and since joining the gym with Janet, she’d steadily lost weight.
She’d also become the proud owner of her very first car. The payments took a hefty chunk out of her wages, but with little else to spend her money on, it didn’t matter.
“Yoo-hoo.”
Janet’s voice roused Katie from the task of folding invoices and stuffing them into envelopes. When she glanced up, she was met by smiling brown eyes.
“It’s almost ten, your turn to get morning tea.”
Glad for the reprieve, she pushed back from her desk. “Cheese scone for you?”
“Correct.” Janet handed her a dollar.
Katie turned toward Hillary and waited for her to finish counting a pile of money. Once she’d tipped the coins into a bag and written down a figure, Katie approached.
“Your usual?”
“Nope.” Hillary picked up a cloth and wiped the grime off her hands.
Katie shuddered, glad she didn’t have to handle cash that had been in God knew how many hands and goodness knew where.
“I’m feeling naughty. I’ll have a custard square.”
Katie took the money and skedaddled. Menial tasks often fell on her shoulders, and she didn’t care. No matter how insignificant, they made her feel important.
When she stepped outside, the sun was high in the sky. Petrol fumes from the service station across the road lingered in the air.
Like her mood, her step was light as she strolled under shop verandas to the nearby coffee shop.
On the way to the counter, she looked left and right, smiling warmly at the few customers dining in. Once she’d bagged their orders; a scone for Janet, a custard square for Hillary, and a club sandwich for herself, Katie stepped up to the counter.
When nobody immediately appeared, she picked up the brass bell by the cash register and gave it a shake. She rocked on her heels, waiting patiently.
The swinging doors burst open and a young woman rushed toward the counter wiping her hands on her apron. When her head snapped up, Katie’s stomach bottomed out.
Silence descended like an axe. Visions of the woman before her being decapitated skidded through Katie’s mind. Although she felt murderous right then, she forced herself to smile.
She had too much respect for Margaret to cause a scene in her café, and customers didn’t need to bear witness to her wrath.
“Katie?” Cherie’s searched her eyes, her voice barely above a whisper.
“That’s me,” Katie replied, her smile so forced it hurt; physically and mentally. She handed over the bagged food, pleased her hands didn’t shake and betray her inner turmoil.
“Will that be all today?” Cherie asked, her smile so smug it made Katie’s skin crawl.
“Yes, thank you.” Katie opened her clenched fist and the handful of coins she’d been clutching clattered on to the counter.
When Cherie leaned across, Katie resisted the urge to head-butt her.
“Found yourself a man yet?” Cherie’s voice was as smug as her smarmy grin.
Fighting hard not to fall apart, she could not, would not, let Cherie get the upper hand, not again, Katie forced herself to smile.
“I have.” The lie left a sour taste in her mouth. “What are you doing working here? I thought you wanted to be a Dictaphone typist?”
A look of disdain crossed Cherie’s face. “That dream died when Mrs Johnstone stamped failed on my typing exam. What a cow.”
How typical of Cherie to blame her shortfalls on someone else.
At that moment, the manageress, Margaret, came bustling into the shop, tray and oven mitts in hand. Standing in front of the pie warmer, her eyes darted from Katie to Cherie and back again. “You two know each other?”
“Yep, went to school together. Cherie took me under her wing.” Katie held her chin high. “Tell her. You know, how you tried to help me.”
The colour drained from Cherie’s face. Her mouth fell open and snapped shut again.
Someone cleared their throat. A customer?
Looking beyond Katie, Margaret greeted an elderly woman. “Hello, Mrs Jenkins. Two sausage rolls, is it?”
Taking that as her cue to do a disappearing act, Katie waved and spun on her heel. “See ya.”
Once outside, a flashback of the massive dildo hit her so vividly her knees threatened to buckle. Anxious to put as much distance between herself and Cherie as possible, she did a quick march back to work.
Fuck.
How
was she supposed to continue doing the morning tea run? It’d been intoxicating to make Cherie uncomfortable, but she couldn’t bear to face her every Wednesday, let alone be polite.
Back in the home décor store, Katie rushed to the bathroom and splashed water on her face. The last thing she needed was her work colleagues asking why she was flustered.
After taking a second to compose herself outside the office doors, she forced herself to smile and stepped through. “Here you go.”
“About time. We were about to send out a search party.” Janet narrowed her eyes playfully. “Did you have to make the custard yourself?”
No, but life just turned to custard.
Unaware of the trauma Katie had just been through, Hillary strolled out of her office cubicle. “Yeah. What took you so long?”
Shit! Think, Katie, think.
The words ‘I had to use the bathroom’ almost tumbled out before Katie could stop them. She didn’t know how they’d feel about her taking their food into the ladies when she could’ve delivered it beforehand.
Two sets of eyes watched her expectantly.
Thinking on her feet, she told a half-truth. “There’s a new girl serving on the counter. She’s still learning the prices of everything, and she had trouble counting out the change.”
Grinning, Janet held out a hand. “About that. You owe me twelve cents.”
Could this day get any worse? Fuck Cherie and her fuckin’ job.
Heat prickled up Katie’s neck as she lied through her teeth. “I spent the change on a club sandwich. I had it in a bag before I realised I didn’t have enough money.”
Bullshit! You bolted without scooping up the money. Slap that L back on your forehead, loser.
Katie wanted to cry like a baby. One glimpse of Cherie and months of overcoming her fears had flown out the window.
“Don’t sweat it.” Hillary smiled.
Her words made Katie acutely aware of a bead of sweat trickling down her back.
“Go have your sandwich and make a cup of sweet tea, you look a little pale.” Hillary squeezed her shoulder.
Before Katie could say anything, the PABX switchboard lit up with two incoming calls. She flicked up the button to answer line one, and Janet picked up line two on her extension.