by Scott, S. L.
“And night,” she replies with a wink.
Vixen.
As we cruise down Lamar toward downtown, she stares out the window, and a tension that wasn’t there sneaks into the space between us. When I cover her hand with mine, I’m reminded of how small and delicate she is compared to me. Touching her seems to startle her from her thoughts. “Are you okay?” I ask.
“You said your home is where I am, but seeing you here in Austin, I realize your life is here.”
“My family is the only thing keeping me here. I love this city, but Jet’s moving. I’m pretty sure Rivers will go too. Is that what you’re worried about?”
“It’s different here. You’re different here. Even though you’ve had this father thing sprung on you, you’re so at ease in Texas. I’ve always thought you were a laid-back guy, but here you’re not putting on a big show. It seems like you’re more at peace. It’s nice.”
“I used to think this town was my comfort zone, but I’ve come to realize it’s not about the place. It’s about the people. Or in your case, the person. You’re my comfort zone. You make it easy to be me. The lines don’t work on you. The attitude isn’t what catches your eye.” I shrug. Looking away for a moment, I try to find the words I want to say. “I know you like this handsome mug, but when I talk, you actually listen. You care what I have to say when I’ve always had to fight to be heard. As the youngest, I thought the more showy, the better. Not with you. I can be quiet with you, and you’re happy to sit in the silence with me other times. So don’t be fooled just because I don’t have the stress of the tour riding me right now. I’ll be good in LA because I’ll be with you.”
“I worry because I don’t want to change you, and I don’t want you to change for me.”
“If I change, it will be for the better because I like who I am with you. Since I met you, we don’t have to go out and party to have a good time. I like that we exercise together. I like watching you on stage and seeing you when I come off. Movies in and room service have become something I enjoy because I’m doing it with you.” I squeeze her hand to my chest and then kiss her knuckles. “I’m a better version of myself because of you, Nikki.”
“That’s what you do for me.”
She winks and then one side of her mouth slides up. “See? Kismet.”
Sexy know-it-all.
* * *
Standing at the edge of Mt. Bonnell, I look over at Nikki. Her face is as bright as the sunshine. “Why are you smiling so much?”
“I’m happy,” she replies. “I never imagined Texas looked like this. There are trees as far as the eye can see. Look how the sunlight reflects off the river below, and the houses dot the landscape.” Turning back to me, she lifts her sunglasses to the top of her head. “It’s beautiful here.”
“You’re beautiful everywhere.” She appears as relaxed as she’s dressed, wearing a tank top and cutoffs with her sneakers. Happiness looks damn good on her.
When I catch her eyeing me like she likes what she sees, as she so often does, she says, “I like you in shorts. You have nice legs.”
“Damn, woman. Don’t turn me on.” I adjust my package. “There’s only prickly bushes and rocks up here, and I’m not above fucking you in the brush.”
She rolls her eyes but laughs. “So easy. Almost predictable at this point. I think the wind could blow, and you’d get hard and horny.”
“And the problem is?”
Raising her hands in surrender, she laughs even harder. “No problem here.” Draping her arm on my shoulder, she says, “I’m hungry after hiking. Feed me, dear husband.”
I take her hand in mine, and we start back to the truck together. “I will never tire of you calling me that.”
She pulls my hand, yanking me to a standstill. “Good.” She wraps her arms around my neck and raises her chin up. “Because I will never tire of calling you that.”
* * *
The black cowboy hat should have tipped me off to the darkness that’s entered my life. With a large belt buckle, I know he didn’t earn at a rodeo, shining in the sun, Berk leans against the wall next to my door. And here I thought we’d fill up on lunch, then come home to mess around before taking a nap. Fuck him for fucking up my plans. “What do you want?” I walk past him and unlock the door for Nikki, guiding her inside. I won’t give him the honor of her presence.
Worry is already furrowing her brow when I want nothing but for her to be carefree. I reassure her, “I’m fine.”
I push the door closed enough to hide us from sight but left cracked open so she can listen if she’s so inclined. Knowing Nikki, because she loves me, she’ll listen. I cross my arms over my chest and look him straight in the eyes. “There’s no proof you’re my father. A photo means nothing. It’s your word against everything I was ever told, including my mother’s word.”
“I’m glad we can talk man to man without your half brothers here.”
“Fuck you. Don’t come to my house and act like you have more of a claim than they do. They’re my family. You’re nothing to me.”
“I’m your dad.”
“No. You aren’t. My brother was more of a dad to me than any adult ever was. So I’m not buying whatever you’re selling. You can leave and don’t bother coming back.”
“You’re ignoring the obvious.”
“I don’t care what you think is obvious.”
Shifting, his gaze moves to the ground, and he kicks a rock into the grass. “Look, Tulsa, I loved your mother, but I wasn’t in a place to care for her or you.”
“So, you fucked her over and let her work herself to exhaustion raising three kids on her own. You’re a really upstanding guy, you know that?”
“Times were different—”
“Like I said, fuck you.” I turn around to go inside. I refuse to give him a platform to spread his poison.
He grabs me, but as soon as his cigarette-stained fingers touch me, I turn with my fist raised, ready to pummel him. “Tulsa,” Nikki calls from behind me, my name from her sweet lips causing me to pause.
Anger courses through me, but when she touches my back, I get a hold of myself. Berk doesn’t flinch. It’s almost as if he knew we’d end up like this. He says, “We’re more alike than you realize.”
I won’t do it. I won’t align myself with his blood or his anger, his habits, his looks, or his reactions. I’m better than that. Lowering my arm, I shake my head. “We’re nothing alike. Whether you’re my biological father or not, you walked away. My mother worked seven days a week to give your son what he needed. You chose not to be my dad twenty-three years ago, so I don’t need you now, and I sure as fuck don’t want to get to know you. You have no business being here, so kindly fuck off.”
He takes a step back, his gaze remaining hard on mine. “You can curse up a storm, Tulsa Cartwright—”
“Don’t you ever fucking call me that! If you are my father, you had a say regarding my name when I was born. I’m a Crow, whether you like it or not.”
“Fine. You can believe Shep is your dad all you want, but know that I loved Louisa. I just couldn’t be what she wanted back then.”
“She didn’t have the luxury of treating life and love so frivolously.” Taking another step toward the door, I say, “This is the last time we’re going to ever talk, so listen carefully. I’ve heard what you have to say, but it doesn’t matter anymore. Whether you loved my mom or not doesn’t change the fact that you walked away. You left her with kids to raise on her own. So blue eyes and a similar shade of hair color doesn’t make up for your decision not to be my dad.”
Nikki’s hand rubs my shoulder, and I glance back. He says, “You’re angry. I get it, son.”
“I don’t know how to be any clearer than I am, so let me slow it down for you. You. Are. Not. My. Father.”
“All right, I understand that’s how you feel right now. But when you’re ready to move forward with the truth—”
“Let me ask you something. Why do you care? Why now?�
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“I’ve gone twenty-three years thinking about you. If you want full disclosure, I have some health issues—too much smoking. Too much drinkin’ . . . too much livin’ hard. You’re the one regret I have.”
“So you’ll sully my mother’s name by trying to make yourself feel better about all the hell you raised?”
“Your mother was the only woman I ever really loved. If Shep hadn’t gotten to her first—”
“You’re a sick fucker, you know that? I’m not sure if you’re purposely trying to destroy my family or if you’re honestly dumb enough to claim I’m a wrong you’re trying to right. Which is it?”
“I didn’t destroy the family back then. That’s not my intention now—”
“That’s what I’m trying to figure out. What is your intention?”
“To build a relationship. Give it some thought. You have my number.”
“I already lost it. Oops. Now lose my address and never contact me again.”
He holds out another card. When I don’t take it, he sets it on the ground at my feet and then turns to go. I watch him walk away like I need the confirmation that he leaves. When he’s long gone, I go inside, passing Nikki, who steps to the side. I know what she’s doing. “Leave it.”
She reaches down anyway, picks up the card to bring inside, and says, “You might change your mind.”
“I won’t.” I’m still seething from the conversation with Berk, but I refuse to take it out on her, so I choose to take a shower instead and clean the sweat and filth off that the day has laid. “I have you, Jet, Rivers, Hannah, Alfie, and a niece on the way. I’m good for family. Want to go out drinkin’ tonight?”
Leaning against the doorway to the bedroom, she smiles while watching me strip. “Are you going to show me around town, Tulsa Crow?”
That Berk business was easy. Telling him to get the fuck out of my life was the right thing to do. I already feel freer from the burdens he brought. This is good. When I drop my drawers, I say, “I’m going to show you off around town, darlin’, but first, we shower.”
“Is that an invitation?”
“It’s a request.” I smirk. “Now get naked and meet me in there.”
“You drive a hard bargain.”
“I love driving a hard and fast . . . bargain with you.”
She pulls her shirt off over her head and drops her shorts. As much as I love watching my wife get naked, I like having sex with her more. I go into the bathroom and start the shower so the water warms up.
I pull two towels and two washcloths from the cabinet. Nikki comes in with her bag full of beauty stuff, and I test the water. “It’s ready.” Watching her take the hairband out of her hair and letting the blond locks fall over her shoulders never gets old. She’s a goddess. And she’s mine. I’m so fucking lucky.
She steps in, and I follow, watching that fine ass of hers as she moves. Water pours over her head and down her body while I settle behind her, taking her tits in hand and pressing my growing erection against the top of her ass. Leaning down, I kiss her neck. When her head falls back on my shoulder, I whisper, “I want you like this.”
“Like what, babe?”
“From behind.”
Her eyes open, and she appears to mull over my request, then whispers, “Okay.”
Pressing forward between her cheeks a little more, I reach down and touch her silky, wet pussy. “Do you want me here or . . .” I keep contact while sliding two fingers around and up until I come in contact with skin so soft and gently embracing the tip of my finger. Just a little pressure and she clenches, not pushing away, but reacting. “Or here?”
“My body is yours just like yours is mine. How do you want me?”
Her trust is an aphrodisiac. “We have long lives ahead of us and plenty of time to explore. I want to be inside you so much. Bend forward.”
She anchors her hands on the shower wall, and I move several times between those sweet cheeks before angling lower and pressing into her heat. My stomach clenches as I’m engulfed in her heavenly body.
This time, it’s not as gentle and a lot less smooth than yesterday. This time, I make her come while buried inside her. This time, I fight for a release that will set my troubles free. This is everything I need—her and the taste of freedom she brings. For her, I don’t have to be anything but me, and she loves me endlessly.
32
Tulsa
“This is the place I was telling you about.” I want to hold Nikki’s hand, but we’re paying the price for privacy and keeping a little distance. Rivers is walking in front of us because the reality is we can’t honeymoon here. Going out in Austin means we’ll see everyone anyway, so we might as well hang out with him. Rivers is never a problem. His personality may mean he’s generally quiet, but he’s still entertaining, especially with a few shots in him.
The soot-covered brick wall hides the cool vibe inside the bar. When we turn the corner, I see a familiar face sitting on a barstool just outside the door. Rivers is shaking hands with him and asks about the band when Nikki and I walk up. I shake his hand. “Hey, Dean.”
“Tulsa Crow, slummin’ it back on Sixth Street tonight?”
“Like a homing pigeon, I’ll always find my way back.”
He says, “I was telling your brother that you guys should check out the band tonight. Local guys. Used to play with Dave Carson.”
I tense, and by how Rivers stands straighter, he must be thinking the same thing. Rivers asks, “Hunter Hix used to front Dave’s band.”
“Nah, that guy spent a few months in Huntsville. Might still be in jail. His old band kicked him out. They have a new lead singer.”
“Interesting.” The band lineup is listed on the board behind the doorman’s head. “Headliners?”
“No, they’re up next.” Dean checks his phone. “About five minutes.”
“Let me introduce you to Nikki.”
“Hey.” He nods and checks her out.
Turning to her, I smile. “This is Dean. He’s worked this door longer than we’ve been a band.”
“Hi,” she replies.
His eyes narrow on her, and he points. “Nikki Faris, right?”
“Yeah.”
He pops off his chair. “Wow, your band’s amazing. I caught your show two years back at ACL. When’s the album coming out?”
She hates this question but laughs. “Hopefully by the beginning of next year. I’m not really sure. The tour’s taking all our time right now. We’ll be back in the studio after it ends.”
“Man, look at you.”
If I’m not mistaken, he might be blushing. Patting him on the shoulder, I relate. “I get it, dude. I do.”
He asks her, “Speaking of slummin’ it, what are you doing with these two characters? They haven’t driven you nuts on the tour, have they?”
Bumping me with her shoulder, she’s the one who appears to blush this time. “They’re good guys. Amazing musicians.”
We all laugh. Rivers pipes in, “Notice she thinks we’re better musicians than we are good guys?” He gives her shoulder a little squeeze. The friendship between them is nice to see. She’s really becoming part of the family.
When the sound of guitars and drums echo out the front door, Dean says, “Sounds like they’re warming up. Go on in.”
“Thanks. Catch you later, maybe?”
“I’ll come in for a drink.”
Rivers and Nikki head in, but I pull out a hundred and hand it to him. He looks at it like it offends him. “What’s that for? I’m not charging you a cover.”
“You’ve always been good to us, Dean. Scored us gigs back in the early days. It’s not a lot, but you can party on it some night.”
His offense is gone, and an understanding is established. “Thanks.” As he tucks it into his wallet, he says, “Jen’s working tonight,” like I should know why he’s telling me. He laughs because he knows me well. Adding, “She still grumbles about you never calling her.”
“Ah. That Jen
.” I move inside the doorway when some guys walk up. As he starts checking their IDs, I reply, “Thanks for the heads-up.”
“No problem. Good to see you, man.”
“You too.”
Inside, I weave through the crowd and join Nikki and Rivers at the bar. The bartender fills three glasses and doles out our drinks. Raising her shot, Nikki says, “Down the hatch,” and the fun officially begins.
An hour later, the band on stage starts clearing their gear. “Dean’s right. They’re good.”
Rivers says, “I’m going to talk to them.”
With her elbows resting on the bar, Nikki watches him leave, then says, “They are good.” When she angles toward me, her shoe taps mine a few times. “Do you miss it here?”
“Miss being here or playing here?”
“Both.”
“Yes, to both, but I like what I’m doing now more. Everything I wanted has happened.”
She arches her back and presses her chest into me. “Even marriage? I bet you didn’t plan on that.”
“How much?”
“How much what?”
Reaching down, I rub the underside of her ass, away from the view of others. “You said you bet me. How much are you betting?”
“I bet my forever.”
“Guess you lose then.”
Tapping my nose, she says, “I think I won the whole kit and caboodle.”
She’s so damn cute. “What is a kit and caboodle anyway?”
“Tulsa Crow!”
Shit.
Nikki turns around to see Jen standing there with pursed, hot-pink lips, blue-rimmed eyes, bleached blond hair, and a shirt so low-cut we might catch a glimpse of what she’s trying to hide in those skintight jeans.
And then with a smirk on her face, Nikki leans back as if she’s about to watch a fight break out and wants popcorn before the show begins. I whisper, “You think this is funny?”
“I do.”
“Traitor.”
“I think this is part of Rivers warning you about that past catching up.”