by Sara Snow
“There you guys are.” We looked around and saw Elinor speed-walking towards us, her hair blowing behind her like a curtain.
“What happened?” I asked before she reached us. I could see the rage blazing in her eyes from a distance.
Cyrus stepped forward, his face morphing into seriousness. “Are you okay?”
She nodded. “I’m fine, but my father won’t be after I kill him.”
“What are you talking about?” I asked.
Elinor let out a deep breath that sounded a little too much like a growl. "He's invited all the wolves in the area to a gathering—here!—so that I can find my mate among the firstborns.” She shivered in rage. “Yet he mentioned nothing about this to me. Nothing! I only found out because Nolan just told me.” She shook her head as she closed her eyes, her voice breaking. “Does he not realize how this looks? It’s like I’m being sold, like . . . like he can’t wait to be rid of me.”
I pulled her into a hug before she broke down, and she clung to me tightly. We stood there for a moment as her breathing slowed. Finally, she gently pulled away.
“I . . . I'm going to head home. I need to talk to him tonight." She bit down on her lip. "I'll see you guys tomorrow."
Cyrus placed his hand on her shoulder. “Do you want us to walk with you?”
She looked up at him and shook her head. “It’s okay. I’ll be okay. Are you doing better?” That was just like Elinor, worrying about others when her life was going to hell.
Cyrus smiled and nodded. “I’m fine.”
She gave us another tight-lipped smile and turned away. My heart was breaking for her. Alpha Grayson did seem to be putting a lot of effort into finding her mate. What was the rush? Once Elinor met her mate, she’d have to leave the pack immediately to begin her transition into Luna.
“I know how she feels, having a life forced on you that you don’t want,” Cyrus said, more to himself than to me as he watched Elinor’s departure.
I sighed and looped my arm through his. “Are you staying at our place? I’m sure Mother would love to see you.”
He looked down at me as the side of his mouth tilted upward with a little smile. “Sure.”
Elinor
From what I understood, arranged marriages were common for witches. Members of two covens would be promised to each other at birth, with the sole purpose of strengthening their magic. I didn’t know the details, but maybe I needed to speak with a witch who’d experienced it to understand how she’d managed to deal with the fact that she had no say in choosing a life partner. Because right now, I was definitely having a hard time with it.
The Goddess made a mate for each werewolf so no wolf would never be lonely. But not all wolves found their mate . . . and they weren’t necessarily lonely or unable to experience true love. In fact, many wolves went through life without a mate. It wasn’t even unheard of to see wolves marry someone who wasn’t their mate.
However, a wolf from a noble family—someone like me—was subjected to an immense amount of pressure to find their true mate because it was believed that when true mates had offspring, the combined genes of two wolves made solely for each other would guarantee strong children to carry on the bloodline. Werewolves were all about strength and power.
Alpha-born females were rare. Born with the strength of an Alpha but forbidden to assume the title, if an Alpha-born female was mated to an Alpha male, they’d be the ultimate power couple. And that was why so many Alphas wanted their sons to be mated to me.
Far from feeling desirable, I felt as if I was being treated like livestock, paraded around like a prized heifer at a fair . . . and I was about to let my father know.
I walked into my father’s office without knocking. “When were you going to tell me? Were you waiting until the night of the party?”
My parents were sitting together on the floor by the window, talking happily. But when I walked in, the smiles on their faces quickly faded.
“We were going to tell you,” my mother insisted.
I laughed humorlessly, shaking my head. “Do you have any idea how I felt hearing it from someone else?” I looked at my father. “Are you really so eager to get rid of me?”
He got up slowly. “What do you mean, Elinor? I don’t want to get rid of you, but you’re of age. It’s time you find your mate.”
“You know, I wonder if you’ll force Jackson to find his mate the way you’re forcing me.”
My father sighed and held his hand out to my mother, helping her to stand. “Elinor, there are so many girls out there who wish they were in your position. You’re a firstborn and female. You have power very few werewolves have—either male or female. As a Luna, you will be able to do so much with your influence. Besides, you know the pressures noble girls are under to find their mates. That is just the way it is.”
"Okay then, Father. How about you let me find my mate on my own? You and every other Alpha were either allowed to find your mates on your own or were lucky enough to find them quickly through arranged meetings. I don't hate visiting other packs as much as I hate this urgency you seem to have for me to be mated. I'm only nineteen years old, Father. I'm still young. Stop broadcasting my availability to everyone as if I'm a prime cattle to be sold!"
I wiped at a tear that escaped. My mother released my father's hand and stepped forward, her eyes misty as well. But I was not in the mood for her pity. I knew she would stand by my father’s decision, no matter what.
“You know, I think you’re pushing this because you know I’ll never give up my dream of becoming a Guard. You hate the idea, and you know I’d succeed at it. That’s what I’d be known for. I’d make a name for myself as something other than Alpha Grayson’s precious female firstborn.” I shook my head as I held his gaze, watching his eyes darken with each word. “Maybe my mate is an Alpha-born, and he’s somewhere out there. Maybe someday I’ll even meet him. But neither of you care about what I want right now. I know there is nothing wrong with being a Luna. I know I'd still have influence. But that's not what I want to do. I want to use the strength I have the way a true Alpha would. You understand what it's like, don’t you, Father? We have so much power, and I hate that you want me to suppress it."
My face was slick with tears at this point, as was my mother’s, but my father had long since turned his back on me.
"You don't know how I'm teased," I said softly. "Right now, I am nothing but a firstborn, but I swear to you, by the time I die, I will be remembered for more than just that."
I turned and walked from the room, my fists clenched so tightly, my nails pierced my skin. I relaxed my hands as I dug deep inside myself and woke my wolf. I walked by a few men and women who’d obviously overheard everything I had said, if their sheepish expressions were anything to go by.
I started shifting, uncaring that my dress was ripping to shreds. All I needed now was the freedom that came from running, from feeling the earth beneath my paws and the wind on my face.
I ran into the woods, my throat burning as I held back my howls of agony.
I won’t live and die like this. I won’t!
7
Elinor
We sat silently as Skye helped me fix my hair. Three days had passed since I’d confronted my father, but my outburst had been a waste of time. The gathering hadn’t been canceled, and the following day, wolves from other packs began arriving for the big night.
To avoid meeting any of them before the gathering, I had to remain at Skye’s house. I felt constantly anxious and on edge, panicked that my mate was sure to be among the wolves who had arrived for the party.
Skye had acted as my eyes and ears during the days I’d been trapped inside. From her reports, there were more than twelve firstborns present—those who would become the Alpha for their packs—and twice as many second- and thirdborns.
Now that the dreaded night had actually arrived, I was thankful for Skye’s company as she helped me to get ready. But I was also grateful for the companionable silence b
etween us, as my thoughts ran rampant.
I was certain she could hear my rapidly beating heart, but I appreciated her lack of conversation. She was very aware of how I was feeling and knew better than to ask me if I was okay when it was obvious I was not.
My mother had picked out a pale green dress that she’d insisted I wear, saying that its color matched my eyes. After a long bath in water infused with lavender, I got dressed.
For my ninth birthday, I was given a gift from The Council—a round decoration that looked like a warrior's shield made of iron. I could see my reflection on the polished surface, so I went over to it and stared at my somewhat contorted reflection. Skye placed the final white blossom in my hair, finishing the crown of flowers. Then she stepped back to admire her handiwork.
I let out a deep breath and turned to face her.
“I don’t know if I can do this.” I closed my eyes as I pinched the bridge of my nose. When I opened them, she had sat down on the bed beside me, wordlessly offering her support. “I’m worried that tonight will change everything. If I find my mate and become a Luna, I will have no way to do what I want with my life. I’ll be committed to my mate, my Alpha, my pack, and what I want out of life will be left behind.”
“That won’t happen.” She pushed a strand of hair that had fallen free and tucked it back into place. “Yes, finding your Alpha will make you feel like your world is complete—at least from what we’ve been told. But Elinor, you won’t change as a person, not really. Look at it this way: You may have to refrain from straddling thieves in the marketplace, but you’ll have something better to straddle at home instead.” She winked at me and giggled.
I couldn’t help laughing at that. This was the reason Skye was my best friend.
Skye continued. “You’ll be in a position to change the way things are for Lunas.”
I thought about that for a moment. "You're right," I murmured after a while.
She grinned. “I know I am. You can implement all the changes you want to see. Because honestly, no one else will.”
That much I knew to be true. It was going to be hard to change years of tradition, but I wouldn’t let another girl go through what I was experiencing if I could help it. As a Luna, I couldn’t work with the Werewolf Guard, but I could make sure another female firstborn was allowed to make her own choices.
I stood up and pinched my cheeks. “If I do meet my mate tonight and I eventually start to change, kick my ass and knock some sense into me. Don’t hold back.”
Skye stood up as well, her rose-red dress hugging her curves. “Trust me, I will.” She grinned, then suddenly, her face fell. “I might meet my mate tonight as well . . .”
I puckered my mouth. "You're right. Do you sometimes wonder what he's out there doing? Whoever he is?"
She nodded as she bit down on her lip. “Sometimes . . . but not often. After all, my mother never met her mate, and she’s doing just fine. I’m in no rush to find him, and she’s not forcing me.”
“I wish my parents were like that,” I whispered as I walked to the window across the room.
The night was a cold one, but it didn’t bother me. If anything, the chilly air was soothing to me. In the distance, I could hear the wolves who now filled the forest, members from my pack, and others. Everyone was talking so loudly, their laughter piercing through the trees.
“Father said he’d send for me once everyone is settled inside.” I shook my head. “I’m not really looking forward to making a dramatic entrance.”
“I don’t know. I kind of like the idea. No matter what happens tonight, this party is for you.”
“I guess that’s one way of looking at it,” I drawled. Then I remembered something. As upset as I had been the other day, I’d still noticed that I had interrupted something the other night when I’d come across Skye and Cyrus talking. “So, what was going on between you and Cyrus the other night? You two seemed very . . . close.”
She looked away. “Close? I don't know what you mean." She glanced back at me and shrugged, but I could see that she was trying not to blush. "He was just in a bad mood like you said, on edge from seeing his mother and father."
I held my hand up. “Wait, did you say his father?”
Someone knocked on the door.
“I’ll tell you later,” she replied under her breath.
My heart started beating like a drum once more. Skye and I shared a look, and then she held her hand out to me. When I slid my hand into hers, she gave it a squeeze.
I didn’t know what I’d do without her. I only wished Cyrus had been able to attend. Although he was considered a member of our pack, Cyrus was aware that his presence at the party could make other pack members nervous. After all, demons didn’t usually attend wolf gatherings.
We stepped outside to find Connor waiting. “You look stunning, ladies. Now let’s get going. Everyone is waiting.”
“No pressure,” I mumbled under my breath as I walked away.
I heard him yelp, no doubt from Skye smacking him. Connor was her cousin, and she had no problem putting him in his place.
In the meantime, I kept walking, lifting my dress so it wouldn't get dirty as we walked to the packhouse. The closer we got, the tighter I held onto my dress, my anxiety rising to epic proportions.
I knew the moment my mate caught a whiff of my scent, it would mean the end of this battle between my parents and me. Wolves found their mates through smell, which was why I had to stay at Skye’s. I’d know my mate the moment I smelled or saw him. From what I’d always been told, when a wolf found her mate, it was as if a void in her soul was suddenly filled, an emptiness she never realized she had.
Once a wolf found her mate, the urge to claim her other half became blinding. Both males and females sometimes went into a frenzy, the males more often than the females. A male werewolf would kill anyone who stood between him and his mate.
No wonder I was so nervous.
We finally got to the packhouse, and Connor vanished, leaving Skye and me to make our way inside.
Holding my head high, I entered the house and made my way to where everyone was. Because of the frequent pack meetings, a large room had been created to fit more than forty people inside. I called on my wolf, needing the added strength and courage to face this evening.
I noticed two men standing just outside the entrance to the room, both wearing pale yellow shirts with a family crest embroidered on their left breast. Their gazes swept over us, and I did a victory dance inwardly—two men down.
If either of these men were my mate, I’d know it, and so would they.
My throat caught for a second as I stepped into the room. Silence washed over the area like a wave, and all eyes turned to Skye and me. I kept my face neutral as I scanned the room of people. Men, women, and children were staring at me as if waiting for . . . something.
A minute ticked by, and then two. Finally, I located my parents . . . and saw the irritation on my father’s face. I inhaled as deeply as possible, trying to find a scent that stood out among all the others.
“Do you sense him?” Skye whispered, and I happily shook my head.
“No.” I turned back to my father, and I could see the disappointment in his eyes. I didn’t know if his disappointment was for me or the situation. Right now, I didn’t care.
He isn’t here. My mate isn’t here.
Elinor
I took a sip of the contents of my cup and watched the performers at the center of the room—a woman and two men reenacting a famous love story from our history. In it, a she-wolf fell in love with a wolf who wasn’t her mate, and when she eventually met her mate, she rejected him. He was so overcome with grief that he challenged the man she loved and killed him. It was a dark, sad story, though these performers altered it to be a satire.
A werewolf rejecting their mate wasn’t common, but it did happen. Losing one’s mate, whether by rejection or death, was like having a vital organ crushed.
While I remained reserved but
watchful, Skye was off being the social butterfly that she was. After realizing I wasn’t mated to any of the men present, my father called for the performers, hoping to lessen the awkwardness that was floating around the room.
I was introduced to a few Alphas and their families and enjoyed chatting with them for the most part. My father was able to mask his disappointment to everyone else, but I could see it in his eyes. It was also crazy that it didn’t feel weird for us to talk and laugh with each other after the argument my father and I’d had. We hadn’t spoken to each other since that night, yet here we were, putting on a show.
It wouldn’t be tasteful to act as if we were at odds with each other . . . but I just didn’t like how fake it made me feel. So, when the opportunity presented itself, I took my drink and moved to the back of the room where I could observe.
“Why are you back here all alone?”
I looked to my right as a man approached me. He was wearing a black leather vest over a white cotton shirt with a low neckline. The smooth dark hairs peeking out from beneath his shirt were the same color as his slicked-back hair. He came to a stop beside me, a warm smile curving his lips. “I’m Mathew Greendale, son of Alpha Vincent from the Silver Pride Pack.”
He placed his hand over his heart and bowed somewhat, and I did the same, entranced by his smile. "Nice to meet you, Mathew. I’m just enjoying watching everyone. It’s nice to see everyone getting along like this.”
He nodded. “You’re right. So many packs here are feuding, but they came together for you.” His lips curved with a grin. “Oh, the power you hold.”
I laughed. “Riiiiiight. You forget, they came at my father’s request, not mine. I think it’s the power he holds.”
“With all due respect to him, they came to see you. You’re seen as a prize among many here.”
I hummed my response and looked around the room. That was exactly what I didn't like. I was not a prize to be won. I could see Mathew still looking at me in my peripheral vision, so I turned back to look at him.