by Nick Marsh
As to Colonel Goodenough, no body was ever recovered. It is likely this was blind chance more than anything, as an untended human corpse in the wilderness of southern France could not remain intact for very long. Rumours and reports persisted, however, in the months that followed, of an elderly, lame gentleman, wearing a worn suit and carrying a stout ironwood stick, always travelling northwards, towards the sea, and the top of the world.
Archivist Johannsen.
Horror on the Orient Express
Although I am the writer of The Express Diaries, I am not the author of the story. Credit for this belongs to two different groups of people.
‘Horror on the Orient Express’ is a campaign for the ‘Call of Cthulhu’ roleplaying game – a game of dark existential horror, based upon the works of Jazz-age weird fiction author H.P. Lovecraft. The campaign, published in 1991 by Chaosium, went on to win the Origins awards that year for Best Role Playing Adventure, and quickly became a classic. The fundamental structure of the Express Diaries (the trek across Europe to recover pieces of the Sedefkar Simulacrum) came from the campaign, as well as all of the story’s major antagonists (Fenalik, the Duc d’Essientes, Selim and Mehmet Makryat). I am indebted to those writers who have allowed so many of us to play in their world, as well as giving me permission for this novelisation of their work.
Although it has been since been produced as lavish box sets in French and German, the English language version remains sadly out of print at the time of writing.
The twists of the plot would be incomplete, however, without the characters who battle through it. In 2008, the Bradford Players (a group of roleplayers based in – you may be ahead of me here – Bradford) played through the Horror on the Orient Express with a group of characters with which you may now be familiar: Mrs Violet Davenport, Colonel Neville Goodenough, Professor Alphonse Moretti, Miss Grace Murphy, Mrs Betty Sunderland and Margrave Milos Valinchek. What’s more, they recorded the game, and made it available online, which is where I first encountered it.
For the novel, some changes were necessary to the story, mainly for reasons of brevity, but the omissions were painful to make. I deeply regret, for instance, the readers of the Express Diaries will never understand the heights of medical incompetence of a certain Doctor Winstanley (who only makes a cameo appearance in the novel), nor will they realise the true horror of the phrase ‘Chicken leg face!’. Within these pages, we never even meet Amelia Scott, Max Calibré or the mysterious Mary Dawson. For anyone interested in uncovering these secrets, I would encourage them to head to www.yog-sothoth.com , where all can be revealed.
Horror on the Orient Express Credits
Marion Anderson & Phil Anderson – Belgrade (sadly omitted from the novel)
Bernard Caleo – Milan
Geoff Gillian – Original Outline, Campaign book, London, Constantinople, the Return
Nick Hagger – Paris, Lausanne
L. N. Isinwyll - London
Peter F. Jeffrey – Campaign book
Christian Lehmann – Campaign book
Thomas Ligotti – Zagreb (also omitted from the novel)
Penelope Love - Venice
Mark Morrison – Project, editorial, additional text (Australia)
Russell Waters - Trieste
Richard Watts – Sofia
Lynn Willis – Project design, editorial, additional text (California)
Special thanks to Lynn Willis at Chaosium
Yog-sothoth.com Credits
Paul (of Cthulhu) Maclean - Keeper of Arcane Lore, webmaster, and nicest man in horror
Helen (Mrs of Cthulhu) Maclean – Violet Davenport
Fin Patterson – Colonel Neville Goodenough
Val Robertson – Betty Sunderland (the ‘silver fox’)
Neil Young – Milos Valinchek
Claire Simpson – Grace Murphy
Jim McStravick – Professor Alphonse Moretti
Acknowledgments
Many, many people have helped make The Express Diaries into a reality. Aside from the credits for characters and plot above, I’d like to thank the tireless proofreading and excellent suggestions from Peter Cruise, Brian Lavelle and Viv Dunstan, who all went above and beyond the call of duty for the book.
Further thanks and appreciations must go to Neil Young, Jonathon Gorton and Joe Marsh, who supported and helped me during the long writing process, and remained stoic in the face of my many questions, and to Helen Maclean and Amelia Bliss for further proofreading and suggestions (and can I take the opportunity to say that I’m really sorry about that bit?). Any errors remaining in the text are almost certainly to my own tinkering after their efforts.
I would also like to thank all the funders of our project. There is no question that you couldn’t be reading these words now if it wasn’t for all of them. Thanks, for all your generosity and patience, to: Adam Whitelock, Alan Aldous, Alexander Allan, Allan Beiderman, Amelia Bliss, Andreas Hippe, Andrew John Noble, Andrew McAllister, Andrew Schubert, Andrew Smith, Andy Wells, Anthony Pineda, Arthur Chenin, Ashley Laycock, Ashley Simmons, Barac Wiley, Becky Osiecki, Belinda Kelly, Benjamin Bell, Benjamin Smith, Benjamin Wenham, Bernard Caleo, Björn Carlsson, Brian Courtemanche, Brian Lavelle, Brian Overton, Carol A. Griffin, Cesar Bernal Prat, Charlotte J. Platt, Chase W. Beck, Chris Field, Chris Green, Chris Haythornthwaite, Chris Huning, Chris Huning, Chris Jarocha-Ernst, Christian Lehmann, Christina M. Lanier, Christopher M. Smith, Christopher Miles, Claire Simpson, Colin Thompson, Craig Wallerstein, Dan Kramer, Daniel Ley, Daniel Mills, Dave Corner, Dave Desgagnes, David Corrie, David Goffin, David Kube, David Lai, David Mascari, David Olliff, Dean Engelhardt, Dirk Brandherm, Dominic Escott, Dominik Douville-Bélanger, Drew Craker, Emrys Hopkins, Enrique Lopez, Eric Schurger, Erik de Graaf, Esa Kankaanpää, Frank Eisenhauers, Fred Herman, Gary Lante, Gerall Kahla, Gesine Stanienda, Gilbert Isla, Grant Flesland, Greg Hartman, Gregg Helmberger, Gregory Koch, Gregory Stanyer, H. Reza Peigahi, Hannah Fordham, Heiko Buse, Helene Lemire, Henric Nilsson, Henry Walshaw, Hugh Jesseman, Ian Davidson, Ian Glen, ,Ian Maclean, Ian Plowman, J.J. O'Shaughnessy, Jacob Trewe, Jamas Enright, James Harrison, James Hall, James Haughton, James Kitchen, Jamie Rosen, Janice K. Smith, Jared Obermeyer, Jason Bledsoe, Jason Denen, Jason O'Mara, Jason Thompson, Jason Waskett, Jeff Okamoto, Jennifer Goldman, Jeremy Stuckwisch, Jo Thomas, Joe Collins, Joe Heithaus, Joe Schulte, Joerg Sterner, John Dodd, John F. Rauchert, John Fiala, John Long, John Shimmin, Jon Hancock, Jonathan Gorton, Jonathan Mosedale, Jonathan Powell, Joseph Deleskiewicz, Joshua Kronengold, Kathryn L. Smith, Kathryn Landis, Keith Maddocks, Ken Doyle, Ken Lee, Kenneth J. Cook, Kevin C. Wong, Kim Kuroda, Kirk Dilly, Kolja Dimmek, Lee Carnell, Lisa Johnson, Lothar Tuppan, Marc Bruner, Marcus Morton, Mark Froom, Mark Grehan, Mark Hepworth, Mark Ridley, Markus Georg, Markus Widmer, Martin Oakley, Mateen Greenway, Mathew Pook, Matt Ambrose, Matt Nott, Matthew Carpenter, Matthew Winder, Megan Smith, Michael Bowman, Michael G. Williams, Michael Hulsey, Michael J. Raymond, Michael Lanzinger, Michael Medwick, Michael Pereira, Michael Sauer, Mika Lietzén, Montaigne Bouvart, Neil Poree, Neil Shaw, Neil Young, , Niall Maclean, Nick Edwards, Nick Middleton, Olivier Lefebvre, Patrick Barrett, Patrik Olsson, Paul Bendall, Pedro Bazan Marquez, Pedro Ziviani, Peter Cerda-Pavia, Peter Cruise, Peter Risby, Peter Simpson, Petri Wessman, Philip Bass, Philip Cahiwat, Phillip Harvey, R. Burton West, Rachel Durrant, Ralph Dukes, Ralph Shelton, Ralph Shelton, Randall Padilla, Richard Chilton, Rick Lippiett, Rob Dunning, Robbert Raets, Robert Freeborn, Robin Hampton, Sakari Montonen, Sam Condon, Sean Dunlap, Sean Foster, Sergio Rodriguez Garcia, Shane Mclean, Simon Chandler, Simon Copsey, Simon Ding, Simon Hatch, Simon Mott, Skip Tate, Søren Hagge, Stephen Knott, Stephen Perkins, Stephen Sutton, Steve Dempsey, Steve Hinck, Steve Kellett, Steven V. Turner, Stevie Marsh, Stewart Robertson, Temoore Baber, Thomas Coles, Thomas Dahmen, Thomas Trinder, Tim Welch, Tiziano Malattia, Tolley Illustration, Trevor Chapman, Vivienne Dunstan, Wayne Peters, Wes Brandenburg, Wilfred M. Bisson, William Nourse, William Stowers, Wouter Dhondt, Zack Kline.
Last, but (to coin a cliché) by no means least, I would like to thank Paul Maclean. I can’t begin to list all the effort and work he has put into the Express Diaries himself, and one word seems paltry by comparison – but thankyou, Paul, For Everything.
Nick Marsh, May 2012.
About the Author
Nick has never forgiven his parents for giving him a happy childhood, thus depriving him of the necessary angst and bottled-up rage to become a full-time writer. Not only that, his genetic inheritance has so far thwarted every attempt to grow a beard to make him appear dark and brooding. Four weeks of strenuous effort only result in a near-invisible fluffy covering that even a student would quickly shave off in embarrassment.
Since his late teenage years he is proud that he had managed to maintain his height at a constant five feet ten inches. If only everything in life were that simple. He currently works as a veterinary surgeon in Plymouth, and doesn’t think the job is all that bad really. On his days off he spends his time being cruel to pot plants, drinking cups of tea and, occasionally, writing.
He has been a weird fiction fan his whole life, and can still remember the good old days when going out with mates meant funny-shaped dice and dragon slaying, rather than nightclubs and loud music.
Nick is married (to another vet! It makes for some very boring after dinner conversations) and has three horses, two rescued greyhounds and a psychotic cat that he can’t seem to get rid of.
Visit his blog, ‘Maybe it should happen to a vet’ at http://lordof1.blogspot.com, or his website at www.nick-marsh.co.uk
About the Artist
Eric M. Smith is an illustrator, cartoonist, painter and drawer of fine things. Besides having done may creative pieces for the YSDC website in the past, he also illustrated the cover of Lovecraftian Tales from the Table
Visit Eric’s website at : ericmsmith.com
Innsmouth House Press
Innsmouth House Press is an imprint of Innsmouth House, the commercial tentacle of Yog-Sothoth.com. The Express Diaries marks the first major fiction release from Innsmouth House Press.
For more information visit www.InnsmouthHouse.com / www.yog-sothoth.com
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[1] Colonel Neville Goodenough, Retired. Affectionately known as ‘Never’ by the men under his command.
[2] Miss Grace Murphy, secretary and general assistant to Mrs Sunderland.
[3] Mrs Violet Davenport, niece of Mrs Sunderland and family friend of the Goodenoughs.
[4] There are several references in the diaries to this ‘incident’, but frustratingly none of them specify exactly what it was. The House of Ausperg was a famous auction house based in Vienna, Austria, but what the group’s connection to this organisation was remains unknown.
[5] Walter Davenport, also known as ‘The Marvellous Davenport’ was, at this time, investigating the possibilities of taking his magical stage show to the Far East. The details of the trip, and the eventual fate of the magician, remain a mystery to this day.
[6] The first major conflict of the Boer War.
[7] Professor Alphonse Moretti, Italian lecturer and friend of Mrs Sunderland and Col. Goodenough.
[8] Lillian Goodenough, the colonel’s late wife of thirty-five years. She had passed away from pneumonia some eighteen months before the events in this diary occurred.
[9] The colonel suffered several wounds in his long and distinguished military career, but one in particular seemed to continue to bother him, and is always referred as ‘the Wound’. It is believed this is a leg injury, sustained in the colonel’s first military engagement; a skirmish against Zulu warriors.
[10] It is sometimes difficult to keep track of the Goodenoughs, due to their inordinate fondness for the forename ‘Neville’. These names are used without any indication as to which of the colonel’s three sons or, indeed, five similarly-named grandsons are being referred to. If there are extra clues hidden within the journals to help untangle this confusion, they have been sadly lost in translation.
[11] Bertrand Goodenough, grandson of the colonel, and one of the few male Goodenoughs not to pursue a career in the armed forces. Generally regarded as a ‘black sheep’.
[12] Professor Moretti’s dislike of Smith is probably due to the latter’s close connections with the University of Vienna, Austria. Moretti’s hatred of Austria stems from troubles during Italy’s wars of unification, and was a not-uncommon attitude amongst Italians of the day (although there may have been more personal reasons behind Moretti’s animosity).
[13] Violet often refers to Col. Goodenough as Uncle, although they are not related. It appears to have been a term of affection.
[14] Attempting to follow Professor Moretti’s web of past associations and dealings is an exercise mired in misdirection, obfuscation, and more often than not, failure. It is probably better, ultimately, simply not to know.
[15] A medieval torture device similar to an Iron Maiden – a large, man-shaped statue, which imprisons its victims within.
[16] ‘The Whipping Father’. French legend has it that this malevolent character accompanies St. Nicholas as he tours Europe in early December. He is supposed to carry a whip to use on children who have misbehaved during the year.
[17] Extract from Violet’s diary : ‘The day was long and hard, made all the harder by Uncle Neville insisting that he led the dig, assuring us all that he had long experience from his years in the military. Well, I don’t know what they taught him, but with the cold, his arthritis and his war wound, he was by far the slowest of the lot of us. Fortunately, Grace and I dug as quickly as we could when he stopped for one of his frequent rests. The annoying thing was, when he returned he always expressed surprise at how far he had managed to get, and kept telling us all ‘There you are, you see. The military way is the best way.’
[18]The Compagnie Internationale des wagons-Lits, owner and operator of the Orient Express.
[19] Curious – the salon car (a large, open carriage with a bar, chairs and tables) was, as far as we can research, not added to the Simplon Orient express until after the Second World War, and long after the events described here. However, all the party mention entering and spending time there. We currently have no explanation for this apparent anachronism.
[20] So called because the Simplon Orient Express passes through the Simplon tunnel, underneath the Alps between Switzerland and Italy. The Orient Express follows a more northerly route, through Germany and Romania.
[21] A brand of French cigarette popular at the time.
[22] Colonel Goodenough is never good in his diaries at explaining his surroundings, being a man more interested in people than places. The ‘restaurant’ in question, Le Chat Noir, was apparently a large café, offering good food, good local wine and a convivial atmosphere. It was also unmistakably, and rather fiercely, French, which may be why the colonel has little to say about it.
[23] For reasons that are still not entirely clear, Professor Moretti seems to have a remarkable skill at concealing weapons for a historian.
[24] The Simplon Tunnel (hence the Simplon Orient Express).
[25] Professor Moretti’s journal was found by Violet Davenport in the Salon car of the Orient Express. He had evidently been writing in it immediately prior to his encounter with the Duc d’Essientes.
[26] More can be learned about this man from the novel A Rebours by the French author J K Huysman. This has been, until now, regarded as a work of fiction.
[27] Zaharoff was a near-legendary Turkish arms dealer and also a frequent traveller on board the Orient Express. Compartment Seven was often reserved as ‘Zaharoff’s Car’.
[28] A previous adventure the group had in London. The details are sketchy and still being researched.
[29] The Museum of Antiquities in Cairo is still looking for a ‘Professor A. Martin’ in relation to the disappearance of certain artefacts from the Middle Kingdom, and the ‘vandalising and general abuse by fire of the mummified remains of Queen Nitocris’.
&n
bsp; [30] It is likely the colonel is referring to Grace and Violet here, even though they are both in their thirties and not blood relatives of Col. Goodenough.
[31] Aida tells the story of Radames, a young Egyptian warrior, and his love of an Ethiopian slave girl, Aida, who turns out to be the daughter of the King of Ethiopia, with whom the Egyptians are at war. The aria which Violet describes is sung by Aida when Radames is selected to be commander of the Egyptian forces, and the young princess finds herself torn between her love for her country, her father, and Radames.
[32] Mrs Sunderland had, on occasion in her earlier years, been the unfortunate recipient of accusations of such a crime, and may feel somewhat sensitive regarding the term.