by S M Mala
‘Annoying the manager,’ she said quietly and smiled towards the woman. ‘And I can’t see Delores, Caroline’s probably gone to combust somewhere, Ethel has taken over the kitchen and Philip?’ Hatty looked around. ‘He’s probably seduced some bell boy.’ Jake started to laugh. ‘And Uncle Freddie better not be up to mischief. And my dog? Where’s Barney?’
‘He’s with dad,’ said Jake, holding his laptop in the air.
‘You’re not going to get a signal,’ she sighed. ‘Go get a lead and plug it in somewhere. This is one of your father’s hotel, there’s bound to be a point.’ Hatty noticed he was staring at her for a moment. ‘What?’
‘Let’s go and sit somewhere comfortable before we have to run for cover,’ he said and pulled her off the stool as she clutched hold of her glass. Eventually, he stuck her at a table in the corner and put his laptop down. ‘I haven’t got a cable.’
‘I thought you’d finished work?’
‘I wanted to write about the feelings and a reaction as the hurricane rips through the island,’ he replied, pouring out a glass for himself.
‘You want a disaster?’ she said, unimpressed by the comment but knowing he was being honest.
‘Mother nature and human beings. What a perfect combination!’
Jake clinked their glasses and took a sip.
‘Do you think it’s irresponsible to get drunk?’ she sweetly asked.
‘Yes.’
‘So let’s do it then?’
She sat smiling at Jake, knowing he was trying to take her mind off the weather conditions. Hatty examined his beautiful face and kissed his cheek.
‘Ya drunk!’ said Ethel, standing at their table, hands on hips making Hatty jump. ‘An’ dat’s cos ya not eat. People tellin’ me my cookin’ best dey ever ‘ad.’
‘Maybe they think it’s their last meal,’ smiled Hatty cheekily, resting her head on Jake’s shoulder, feeling a little light headed.
‘Ya brave when ya high,’ said the old woman scornfully. ‘Me not able bring ya food. Come an’ get it like everyone else.’
‘I’ll get it,’ said Jake, starting to stand up as Hatty pulled him back down.
‘I’ll get it,’ said Hatty standing.
‘Follow da line trew dere, if ya can see straight, mind.’
‘I can see, I can see,’ she said, stumbling a bit.
Jake jumped up, pushed her back down and walked off towards the restaurant.
Hatty admired his bottom and wanted to get frisky after dinner.
‘Me see what on ya mind an’ it nasty,’ said Ethel, sitting down next to her. ‘Champagne?’
‘Second bottle. Want a glass?’
‘If me must.’ Hatty went to the bar, got a glass and came back, pouring her out half a measure.
‘Dat it?’
‘You’ll get drunk.’
‘If me die tomorrow den not ‘ave a full glass?’ she said as Hatty topped it up. ‘What ya not tellin’ me?’
‘What do you mean?’
‘Ya not wid child an’ Master Jake an’ ya kissin’ up for everyone to see. Sumtin goin’ on.’
Ethel sipped the glass and pulled a face before taking a larger sup.
‘We’re very much in love,’ Hatty said quietly. ‘And it’s very real for both of us.’
‘Ya know da boy goin’ away.’
‘I love him Auntie Ethel. Love him with all my heart.’ Hatty involuntarily grabbed her necklace. ‘And he loves me.’
‘‘e give ya dat?’
‘Yes,’ said Hatty, looking sheepishly around. ‘He knew I’d like it.’
‘Dinner is served,’ Jake said arriving with a couple of plates then produced a large cup for Hatty.
‘Me see ‘e know what ya like,’ smiled Ethel, looking at them quizzically. ‘Beautiful necklace Hatty ‘as.’
‘Did you tell her?’ Jake asked and Hatty opened her eyes wider to show she hadn’t.
‘Tell me?’ Ethel narrowed her eyes. ‘She not tell me nuttin.’
‘We’re getting married,’ Jake said quietly. Ethel’s mouth dropped open and her dentures hit her jaw. ‘It’s a secret.’
‘It’s true,’ said Hatty, unable to hide her smile. ‘He’s going to be my husband.’
‘Oh me gawd,’ she said, grasping her chest and Hatty thought she was going to have a heart attack. ‘Delores know?’
‘No way but my Aunt Caroline overheard us talking and she’s really unhappy about it,’ said Jake, shaking his head furiously and Hatty noticed he went scarlet.
‘A year tomorrow,’ sighed Hatty. ‘April 13th.’
‘Me pleased,’ said Ethel smiling happily. ‘But not say anytin’ yet, ya promise?’
‘I promise,’ said Hatty as Ethel kissed her, before pinching her cheek hard. ‘Me baby Hatty, ya growin’ up fast an’ about time.’
After they ate and constantly kissed, much to the annoyance of Ethel who warned them to stop eating each other, Hatty discreetly pulled Jake away. Panic started to set in when people began rallying together. It felt like the building was being slammed by the wind. Hatty saw pieces of wood fly through the sky. She wanted to forget about it all and be with her lover in the only place she knew was silent. Hatty had run around to check the coast was clear as she dragged him in and locked the door.
‘We have to go downstairs,’ he laughed as she pulled him to the side and pushed him onto the lounger.
‘Not for a few minutes.’
Hatty pulled down her dungarees while he put his hands behind his head.
‘You’re not afraid?’
‘Certainly not as I can’t hear anything,’ she said, crawling up him, kissing his face. She wanted to make love to him if only to avoid what was going on around them. He squeezed and caressed her as she gently scratched his back. ‘I love you Jake.’
‘You’re a little drunk,’ he laughed, kissing her and she felt his hand caress her bottom. ‘But you have a smooth arse.’
‘I’m very happy,’ she said, as they heard a massive crash of thunder. Her heart started beating faster when she looked across and saw the lightening. Jake turned her onto her back and she looked up into his eyes. ‘I thought this place was sound proof.’
‘I know what you need to keep your mind off things,’ he said gently.
They kissed again and she felt him fumble between her legs before he pushed himself in when she wasn’t ready.
‘Gently,’ she groaned as he moved a little at a time before they were moving together, staring into each other’s eyes and kissing. ‘I love you.’
She looked at him as they both smiled. Stroking his back, she felt his long hard thrusts into her while he kissed her face. Their lips met and so did their tongues. Lust and love hit her chest as she pulled her legs higher up, groaning as he moaned in ecstasy. Hatty felt so happy, so loved, and didn’t want the feeling to ever stop but he did suddenly. She heard his little growl knowing he’d shot his love inside her.
‘I got too excited,’ he whispered laughing. ‘I think we better be going downstairs for shelter.’
‘I’m safe here.’
They were suddenly startled by banging on the door.
‘They’re probably rounding everyone up,’ she groaned.
The banging got louder. Jake let out a frustrated sigh, buttoned his jeans and went towards the door. Hatty stood and pulled up her dungarees.
‘Aunt Caroline,’ she heard him say.
Hatty held her breath, quickly tidied up her hair and stepped forward.
‘I saw the pair of your come this way,’ his aunt said, her face frozen. ‘I was going to go downstairs but I needed to speak to you now, before things get out of hand.’
‘Nothing’s getting out of hand,’ he said as Caroline glared at Hatty. ‘It’s the hurricane and-.’
‘I think you two have.’
‘Not now. We were just coming-.’
‘You need to read this,’ she said, handing Jake an envelope as Hatty wondered what it was about. ‘I don’t know
what else to do to make you realise you’re making a big mistake by getting involved with her.’
Jake didn’t immediately recognise the handwriting. It was addressed to Caroline.
‘You should read it,’ Caroline gently said, as he glanced at Hatty, shrugged and opened the letter.
It was from his mother.
His eyes followed the words. Suddenly he felt a sharp blow when it dawned on him what the letter was.
It was her suicide note.
He lost his balance for a moment as Hatty tried to support him but he pushed her away. Jake didn’t know what to think.
‘What is it?’ Hatty asked and he realised why Caroline was so fiercely against her.
‘It’s his mother’s suicide note,’ Caroline quietly said. ‘Can you see why I’m not happy? Can you see what your mother asked?’
‘Jake?’ he heard Hatty say again and he felt sick to the stomach, confusion beating through every pore of his body. ‘What does it say?’
‘I can’t,’ he said, his hands shaking as he felt a tremendous crushing on his lungs as he sat down. ‘Why didn’t you ever show me this before?’
‘I never thought I’d ever have a reason to,’ Caroline said, taking a deep breath. ‘This isn’t how I want it to be but she’s my sister and I owe her this much. I owe you too.’
‘Can someone please tell me what’s going on?’ he heard the small voice say and closed his eyes.
‘It says in this letter written by my mother,’ Jake gulped hard. ‘She says ‘if it wasn’t for his whore’s child, everything would be fine. That baby has destroyed my life and god help me, make sure she doesn’t destroy my son’s. Protect him from her, protect Jacob. Don’t let Murray brainwash him into her becoming part of the family. Promise me you will never let that happen ever. If she hadn’t been born then everything would have been perfect. Harriet has destroyed my life.’’
There was a very heavy silence as he realised Hatty was standing perfectly still.
‘If you love your mother or have any love for me, you will stop what’s going on,’ Caroline said. Jake couldn’t look at Hatty for a moment. ‘For the sake of her memory.’
‘That’s unfair,’ he said, not making eye contact with Hatty.
‘I was a baby, I didn’t do anything,’ said Hatty, her voice cracking. ‘I never met his mother and it’s not my fault, it’s not my fault.’
‘You killed his mother in a roundabout way,’ said Caroline gravely.
‘I didn’t,’ Hatty said, starting to cry. ‘Please Jake, tell your aunt I didn’t do anything wrong.’
‘It says here,’ he said, holding the letter in his hands. ‘It says what she thinks, what she wanted me to do.’
‘But it was a long time ago.’
‘It’s my mother’s wishes!’ he said angrily, not at her, but knowing he was being asked to do something he didn’t, in his heart of hearts, want to do.
‘But Jacob, it was a long time ago,’ Hatty said gently, stepping closer. ‘Things have changed and-.’
‘You don’t understand,’ he said, standing up and staring at her, his eyes filling up with tears. ‘You go on about your innocent mother and your loss. What about my loss, what about me honouring my mother’s wishes? Why is she forgotten about and your mother is idolised when she was the one having an affair with my dad? Your mother drove my mother to this and it killed her. Your mother killed my mother, can’t you see?’
‘No,’ she said, shaking her head furiously, as she started to sob. ‘She didn’t intentionally do anything. She was dead Jacob! How could she do that!’
‘Then you did it!’ he snapped. ‘If you weren’t born then maybe she’d be alive.’
‘That’s a horrible thing to say!’
‘But it’s the truth,’ Caroline said quietly, looking at Jake.
‘If I wasn’t born then my mother would be with your father not your mother!’ Hatty angrily replied wiping her tears away. ‘Let’s speak to Murray, let’s see what-.’
‘He’d only twist it,’ Caroline said calmly. ‘Like he always does. Hatty can’t you see what Jake has to do? It’s his mother’s dying wishes and I have to make sure he honours them. I’m sorry Hatty but if you hadn’t been born then everything would be so different. Jake would have seen more of his father, your mother would have been alive, his mother would be alive. There’s so much death around you.’
‘There’s not!’
‘Oh child, there is.’
Hatty started to shake when she heard Caroline say her spiteful words. Her body shook as the fear Jake was going to turn his back on her.
‘Please Jake, please don’t do this. I love you,’ she sobbed, her hands shaking. ‘I never did anything. I didn’t do anything. I was just born. I never hurt your mother.’
‘I need to think,’ he said, getting up.
Hatty realised he wasn’t looking at her.
‘What’s there to think about?’ sobbed Hatty, trying not to cry harder. ‘I love you and you love me, that’s all that matters. Look at me! Your mother would understand if she saw-.
‘Hatty did you hear what I said!’ he screamed at her. She was frightened of him for the first time ever, as her body shook, her head vibrating unable to look away from his piercing angry eyes. ‘I can’t be with you. I have to respect my mother’s wishes!’
‘No!’ she screamed and tried to fling herself at him as he pushed her away. ‘Don’t do this! Caroline, please tell him, please tell him!’
‘What’s the noise?’ Frederick said, walking into the room. ‘We have to go downstairs now, the hurricane’s about to hit.
‘People can forgive people and it doesn’t matter,’ Hatty said, sobbing wildly. ‘Tell him Uncle Freddie what Murray did. Murray accidentally killed my father to protect me when I was a baby. He killed him because he cared and I forgive Murray, I forgive him. Tell him, please.’
She looked pleadingly at Frederick, hoping this would change things as Caroline’s frozen face now looked gravely concerned.
‘That’s not true Hatty,’ said Frederick, looking away before glaring. ‘You shouldn’t make things up like-.’
‘I heard you talking in your office and Murray told me a few days ago why he did it and-.’
‘Hatty don’t lie!’ said Jake, shaking his head. ‘Please don’t do this!’
‘You see Jake, she’s not the person you think she is,’ said Caroline gently.
‘That’s unfair,’ said Frederick sharply, walking up to Hatty. ‘Let me take-.’
‘Don’t touch me!’ Hatty said angry with his betrayal. ‘Why are you lying?’
‘The question is why are you?’ Jake said and looked at her with disgust.
She felt her heart falling to pieces.
‘Jake!’ Hatty screamed, running up to him as Frederick held her arm. ‘Where are you going?’
‘Away,’ he said gently and stood still for a moment, his back taught. ‘Promise me one thing, when this hurricane is over you will never contact me again, you promise?’
‘Jake?’ said Frederick, looking at the pair of them. ‘What happened?’
‘I can’t, I can’t,’ sobbed Hatty, her heart breaking. ‘I can’t do that because I love you and we’re friends. We’re getting married a year tomorrow and-.’
‘It was a mistake,’ he said and Hatty stopped breathing for a moment. ‘A stupid, stupid mistake.’
‘Your mother was upset when she wrote the letter. Can’t we sort it out?’ she said, knowing she couldn’t face losing him.
‘Never ever contact me,’ he said and Hatty heard the sob in his voice. ‘Everything you touch does die, doesn’t it?’ Jake turned to look at her. ‘Your mother and father, my mother, Simon… who’s next?’
‘That’s not a nice thing to say,’ said Frederick getting agitated. ‘It’s not her fault.’
‘Maybe it is,’ she said, collapsing on to the ground in a heap, crying her eyes out. ‘I beg you Jake please don’t leave me, please don’t go. Please don’t do th
is. I can’t live without you, you know I can’t. I love you so much Jake, please don’t punish me like this, please.’
As she looked up he’d walked out.
‘Hatty?’ Frederick said.
‘You lied Uncle Freddie,’ she said, in uncontrollable sobs. ‘You lied!’
‘Let me-.’
‘No,’ she said, feeling sick to her stomach before screaming. ‘No!’
She watched Frederick walk out and sat on her knees crying face down, not sure what to do. The door opened again as her whole body shook.
‘Hatty,’ Jake said and she looked up, then took a deep breath before smiling, knowing he didn’t mean it. ‘I want to ask you for one thing.’
She saw he was crying as she stood up.
‘Anything Jake, I’d do anything for you,’ she gulped, her heart filling with hope.
‘Even if I call you, even if I beg you to see me, you mustn’t,’ he said, wiping his eyes. ‘I don’t want to ever see you again as it’ll make it harder for us both. Promise me Hatty, will you promise me?’
‘No!’ she said, shaking her head from side to side. ‘I can’t promise you that because I love you and I don’t know how I can live without you Jake, I really don’t. Don’t you see? Your aunt doesn’t like me and she’s doing this now, now she knows we’re in love and-.’
‘On Murray’s life? Promise me you’ll never contact me,’ Jake said as he sobbed.
Hatty stood there realising he was telling her it was really over.
She grabbed the necklace around her neck and cried.
‘I- I,’ her breathing was erratic. ‘This is yours and-.’
‘Keep it,’ he said, quickly backing out. ‘It’s yours anyway.’
Hatty’s body was shaking as she looked at him and tears fell from her eyes. All she wanted was to hold him and she didn’t understand why he was turning away.
‘I love you and I’m scared,’ she whispered as he shook his head from side to side, crying and walked away.
She waited for a second letting it all sink in.
Then she put her satchel across her body and ran to see Murray, knowing he’d help her, wanting him to talk to Jake. As she got to the door the nurse was standing outside.