Stef Ann Holm

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Stef Ann Holm Page 5

by Lucy gets Her Life Back


  They had a wood-burning stove situated on cinder blocks, and it looked to be in decent shape. Bud had left firewood inside, as well as a woodpile toppling over at the side of the house. It would come in handy this winter. The floor planks were rough-hewn and, in spots, uneven. She’d have to figure out how to make the sofa not wobble once she brought it in.

  In the bedroom, her girlie vanity appeared out of place beneath the elk head hanging on the wall. She didn’t have a ladder or else she would have taken it down.

  But overall, the house wasn’t as dire as Jason had made it out to be when they were eating lunch today at Opal’s.

  Lucy just hoped and prayed Jason would adjust and fit in. She wanted more than anything for her oldest son to rebuild his life after Gary. She’d had Jason in family counseling with her and Matt, but it hadn’t helped. People only got from counseling what they put in, and Jason had just sat on the chair and didn’t say a whole lot. He was filled with rage. She knew it, she sensed it. She didn’t think he’d do anything stupid, but she knew it stemmed from a deep-rooted hurt.

  And the irony was—she, more than anyone else, understood. Because that’s how she’d felt about Gary’s leaving—but Jason couldn’t see through his own pain to reach out to her.

  Patience, Lucy kept telling herself.

  Patience and love.

  She was here for her boys. She tried to remain upbeat and optimistic, even when she heard the crash outside.

  Wiping her wet hands down the front of her shirt, Lucy ran out the front door.

  Matt stood on the edge of the porch, his hands over his head to ward off something falling.

  “What happened?” She made her way quickly to him.

  He silently pointed.

  The support post lay in the front yard, and the porch above him sloped dangerously low. Yanking him out of the way, she brought him toward the entry.

  Jason filled the screen door, hands on the frame. He had that annoyed look on his face—the one that sometimes reminded her of Gary. She wanted to smack it away, but of course, she refrained.

  With Matt safely tucked next to the cabin, Lucy went into the yard. “Jason, come out here and help me prop the post back up so the porch doesn’t fall down.”

  They managed to get the post shoved back into position and as secure as she could wedge it for now. She’d have to tell Bud about it, or maybe get out her tools and try and fix it herself, since he already knew about it, and the deal was she was getting this place “as is.”

  “What’d you do, you idiot?” Jason barked at his brother.

  “Nuttin’! I just leaned on it looking for my skateboard.”

  “It’s in our crap for a room.”

  “Jason, that’s no way to talk,” Lucy exclaimed, reprimanding him.

  Jason’s hair fell past his T-shirt collar. He glanced at her before stuffing his hands into his pockets, but didn’t apologize.

  “Excuse me?” she said, waiting.

  “Sorry,” he mumbled. Then, as if the hostility of the world were on his shoulders, he blurted in a snappish tone, “But Matt was being a butthead to lean on the porch. This stink-hole place sucks the big one. I hate it here.”

  Inhaling, Lucy counted to three. She knew if she spoke the first thoughts that came to mind, she’d regret it.

  A moment later, and calmer now, she said, “Jason, I’m sorry you don’t like that we moved, but it was for the best, and I’m sure once we get settled in and you meet some friends, you’ll enjoy the change of pace.”

  “No, I won’t. We don’t even have an Internet connection.”

  That was true. The house was wired with an old, three-prong telephone system. Corded phones were anchored in the kitchen, master bedroom and even the bathroom. They weren’t connected. Thank goodness for cell phones. Maybe she’d have to get one for Jason. She’d been meaning to do so in Boise, but then he’d crashed his pickup. The insurance settlement should be in the mail soon, but it wasn’t much, since the truck had been a beater. At least she’d be able to replace the truck with something else, and he could drive Matt to school in the fall when she was working. But she was reluctant to get him a cell phone because that only meant he could tell her he was one place when he was at another. She’d have to have a land-line rule. He’d have to call from the place he was at when he checked in with her.

  “Well, maybe I can see about having the house updated so we can hook up the computer.” She knew that was unlikely, but she wasn’t in the mood to get into it with her son.

  It had been a long day. She was exhausted. The last thing she needed was to end her night with a confrontation.

  But Jason knew just how to push her buttons sometimes, and he didn’t let up.

  “No, you won’t. You’re just saying that so I’ll get off your back.” He picked up a rock in the yard—if you could call the span of gravel and rickety carport a yard—and threw it into the bushes. “You never follow through except when it’s to your advantage.”

  Gritting her teeth, Lucy stood there. When he was little, she would have given him a spanking. Tears burned the backs of her eyelids. When he was little, he would never have talked to her this way. Her sweet baby boy had changed when he hit puberty, and he’d gotten worse, so much worse, after Gary left.

  Damn Gary. Damn him to hell and back for doing this to them, to their sons. The man was an insensitive jerk, a loser with a bimbo for a girlfriend. He never saw his kids, never took them for pizza, or a sleepover, or any of the things a father should do.

  Lucy knew if she stayed here, she’d lose it. She’d snap at her son and things would only get worse. Rather than say another word, she marched into the house, grabbed her purse and keys and went back outside.

  Jason’s attitude put her in a mood that made her fight to stay sane. He was just so angry at the world and he wore her thin at times.

  Matthew followed after her. “Where ya going, Mom?”

  “To the grocery. I’m all out of cleanser.”

  “I wanna come, too.”

  She opened the car door, realizing she’d forgotten her coat and it was cold outside. Not taking the time to go back in and get it, she slid onto the seat. “No, you have to stay here.”

  “I don’t want to. He’s being a brat,” Matt said, talking through the open window.

  “Jason, you go upstairs and unpack those boxes in your room. I want it done by the time I get back. And don’t you go picking on your little brother or else you’ll be sorry.”

  Without a word, Jason stormed into the house. Matt stayed in the yard as she put the car in Reverse. His chin lowered a notch to his chest.

  The tears she’d been forcing back threatened to fall as she watched her youngest son in the rearview mirror. He sat on the steps of the porch and dropped his chin in his hands. She should have taken him with her, but she needed some alone time.

  Guilt assailed her. She had to be there 24/7 for her boys, but there were times when she just couldn’t do it all. She was only one person, and if she didn’t have a moment to herself, she wasn’t any good to any of them.

  When she turned the corner, a thicket of pines blocked her view. The road had a patch of dirt from the river wash, and the front-wheel-drive Passat forged over the rough spot. She wiped her cheek with her fingertips, then switched on the heater.

  If she hadn’t left her cell phone at home, she would have called her mother. Her parents lived in Sun Lakes, Arizona, and visited only during the warm seasons. They hated the cold winters in Idaho.

  When Dad had retired from the telephone company, they’d moved from Boise to Arizona. It about killed Lucy to lose them, and it was the same for her parents, but they’d lived all their lives in Idaho, and now it was their turn to do what they wanted. Lucy didn’t think they’d ever fully moved past the death of her older brother; he’d drowned in an irrigation canal when he was four years old. Idaho was only a sore reminder to Mom and Dad.

  Lucy drove past the High Country Motel, its lot filled with four
-wheel drives. Bud had mentioned that was the place to trade gossip in town. With all those vehicles taking up spots, something good must have happened. For a moment, Lucy was vaguely curious. Then again, anything in a town like this could be made into something big just for the sake of conversation.

  Sutter’s Gourmet Grocery came into view and she circled the block, still getting used to the parking setup. There were some empty spots down the middle of the low-traffic block, but she had to make sure she wasn’t facing the wrong direction.

  Snagging her purse, she crossed her arms over herself to ward off the cold air of dusk. Inside Sutter’s, she was met by the aromas of soups in the deli section. Lentil among them, if she guessed right. She loved this grocery store. It was intimate, quaint and it lacked for nothing. The prices were on the steep side, though. No supersaver chains in Red Duck.

  Near the entrance was the floral area, and the sweet fragrance of roses mingled with the heavenly scents of the soup. A newspaper rack lined the wall, along with the latest paperbacks.

  She’d already been here once today, purchasing a few things for the house: toilet paper, milk and bread. The boys had wanted candy—and she’d given in. A box of Popsicles, cereal, and the cold cuts they’d eaten for dinner tonight.

  Lucy could get lost in this store. She walked the aisles once more, taking in all the products, her mind working on special menus for special occasions. The place had a fabulous import section, from minicorns to oils and olives. The deli made nice appetizers.

  Wandering toward the espresso bar, Lucy checked the glass-fronted bulletin board to make sure her notice was still up. It was. Now if only her phone would ring off the hook. And with calls for her, not Raul Nunez.

  The fact that people would actually call her looking for him, or to ask her if she had his recipe…it made her reconsider the man’s influence in town. He had more than she’d realized. During their meeting, he’d been arrogant, but friendly. In hindsight, maybe too friendly, as if he knew something and she didn’t.

  Shrugging, she found herself gravitating toward the meat case. It was extensive, with a vast array of fresh seafood. Her boys were such picky eaters, they wouldn’t touch a filet of salmon or a halibut steak. They wanted fish sticks.

  Cooking for the three of them, she was limited in what she served. When she was married to Gary, he’d loved her cooking, couldn’t eat enough of it, and she could get real creative at home. The boys grumbled, so oftentimes she’d made them a grilled cheese sandwich on the side.

  She wished she had someone at home who would appreciate her efforts. But as soon as she thought about it, she envisioned a man at the table. Where that thought came from, she couldn’t guess. She hadn’t gone out on a date since her divorce had been finalized. It wasn’t as if she hadn’t been asked. She had. She just hadn’t been ready. Bitterness didn’t go well with a glass of wine or a movie.

  But lately, she’d contemplated going out on a trial run. Nothing daunting, where she’d be stuck for hours. Coffee, maybe. But then Jason got into trouble at school and her idea about dating changed. She had to focus on her son rather than some romance that would probably go nowhere anyway.

  Checking out the help-yourself seafood baskets of mussels and steamer claims, Lucy was lost in thought and didn’t readily hear her name being called.

  “Lucy. It was Lucy, right?”

  Her chin lifted and she stared into Drew Tolman’s face. She took a step back. The man was so tall, he filled her view and then some as she gazed at him.

  When she’d first seen him in Opal’s Diner, his good looks had definitely gotten her attention—until it became quite clear he was a hard-core charmer even though he was taken. That brunette he was with had laid one on him and clearly stamped his mouth as her private territory.

  If it weren’t for the fact she needed Jason to play Little League, Lucy wouldn’t have given Drew another thought. But it was important her son be involved with sports right now, and unfortunately, Drew was the coach.

  Gazing at him, she willed the wayward lustful thoughts out of her head immediately. Although with her standing this close to him, a few snuck back.

  He was gorgeous…simply gorgeous.

  The way his hair was mussed gave him a casual air that suited him. He still wore the sweats and Sunday-worn shirt he’d had on earlier. The ball cap was missing, which attested to the messy hair. But he still looked good. Too good.

  And he knew it in a nonconceited way.

  She’d come across his type before. Jock men who just thought they were too fabulous for words. Every woman under one hundred would throw herself at them if they held their arms open wide. And Lucy was sure this man had held his arms open for quite a few ladies.

  A former professional baseball player. She read magazines and all those tabloids. These guys usually had women in every state.

  What was he doing in Red Duck, Idaho, of all places? She may have wondered, but she wasn’t going to ask him. She didn’t want to get personal with the man.

  “You’re right,” she finally replied. Then she said something so stupid, even she cringed. “You’re Drew and your girlfriend’s name was Jacquie.”

  So much for staying impersonal.

  For a scant second she wondered if he was going to counter her claim about the girlfriend. Call it a woman’s intuition, but suddenly Lucy recognized there was trouble in paradise for that couple.

  Not that it was her business—nor did she care.

  Thankfully, he let the comment pass. “So, how are you liking town so far?”

  “I like it. It’s different than Boise, but a good different. I’ll be glad to get settled in.”

  “Where are you living?”

  She paused, not sure if she should answer that. In Boise, she would have given a cross street as a general response. In Red Duck, when everyone proclaimed to know everyone’s business, chances were that Drew could easily find out.

  “Lost River Road,” she said simply.

  “Nice area.”

  Some of it was. Their teardown was in an offshoot of a ritzy neighborhood a half mile away. Surrounding them was an overgrown horse pasture and rickety farm, with no sidewalks for skateboards. Bud kept a bunch of old Airstream coaches and dusty RVs on the adjacent property. It was surely no white picket fence scene. No wonder the boys were embarrassed. The idea of Drew seeing where she lived wasn’t one she wanted to imagine.

  “Doing some shopping?” he asked.

  He held a handbasket with a thick steak, big russet potato and a bag of spring mix inside. His soft leather, black wallet and key fob were tossed inside. Her hands were empty.

  “Actually, I just needed a break from unpacking. And I wanted to see if my notice was still up.”

  “Notice for what?”

  “I’m a personal chef.”

  His stance changed and he grinned. “I like anything personal.”

  The big flirt. A real player, and not just at bat. Lucy held on to a frown. “It’s nothing like you’re thinking…whatever it was you were thinking.”

  “I only said I like things personal.”

  She opened her mouth to add something, then snapped it shut. If she had banter experience, she would have been more apt to have a fast comeback. As it was, she floundered, but quickly willed herself to regroup. “I cook for people in their homes.”

  “I know what a personal chef is. Raul Nunez cooks for me sometimes.”

  Lucy bit the inside of her lip. Who didn’t Raul cook for?

  “Well, if you know of anyone who’d like my services, it would be great if you could mention my advertisement, which will be in this Wednesday’s newspaper, or the bulletin board here.”

  His posture was casual, his fingers hooked loosely around the basket’s metal handle. “I can do that. What’s your specialty?”

  The way he said it had her questioning his intentions. He was playing around with her now that the shark girlfriend wasn’t next to him! Lucy fought against rolling her eyes.

/>   “I don’t have any one specialty,” she said, not taking his bait if he meant to lead her into any kind of sexual innuendo.

  She was so rusty in this department, she wasn’t sure if she was coming or going. He knew the game and she didn’t have a clue to the rules. She didn’t like this.

  He smiled and her heartbeat snagged. “Maybe I’ll have to tell Raul I’ve hired you.”

  The prospect both excited and dismayed her. She needed the business, but… Working for this man would be a challenge at best. He was way too confident and laidback about his presence. He had to know good and well what effect he had on women. My goodness, she’d seen Opal practically jump out of her panty hose to please him with those biscuits.

 

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