His mom had said they could go car shopping this week and get him a cell phone. Badass! He was getting another truck he could fix up. He couldn’t wait.
They’d packed up everything from the dock, and Drew’s boat was back on the trailer hitch. Everyone stood around in the ramp parking lot, saying, “See you next year,” even though they’d still see each other in town. Funny how this place was like one big family.
At first, Jason hadn’t liked that about Red Duck. But now he though it was neat that people cared about each other. Even that gorilla-hairy guy who talked so much—Lloyd. He’d brought a plastic grocery bag filled with garden tomatoes to the Sunrise just because he had extras. And Opal, she was real nice to Ada, the dog groomer. Spin was funny when she’d sometimes swear. Jacquie was okay, too. She’d been hanging out at the Sunrise a lot. At first, he hadn’t liked her, but he’d seen her with Spin, and Spin was real happy to have the company.
As Drew and some of the dads got talking, Jason went up to Mackenzie, who stood by the Hummer.
“So…hey,” Jason muttered, unable to really think of anything good to say. He wanted to give her a hug goodbye, but there were people around and he was self-conscious.
“Hey,” she replied, smiling back at him.
She had the best smile ever. And he could listen to her talk for hours.
“So what are you gonna do when you get home?”
“I’m going to take a semester off before going to college. Me and my dad are going to take some trips together and get to know each other better.” The pink sunglasses she wore covered her eyes. He wanted to look into them in the worst way. “He wants to take me to California. I’ve never been. We’re going to Disneyland.” Her smile was perfect, just like a chewing gum commercial. “I’m going to college in January. I told him I would. That’s what my momma wanted.”
“What are you going to be?”
“I don’t rightly know yet. Maybe a photographer.”
“You’d be good at it.”
She laughed. “I don’t know about that. I’ve only been messing around with my dad’s camera. It’s fun to doctor the pictures up on the computer.”
Jason looked at his feet, the chunky rubber sandals and his big toes. He felt awkward and clumsy. Lifting his chin, he said, “Well, I liked hanging out with you this summer.”
“I liked it, too. We should call each other sometime.”
“Yeah. I think that would be cool.”
“Or e-mail.”
“We’re getting the Internet. My mom figured out the house can be wired for it.”
Mackenzie slipped her glasses off her nose. She stood barefoot, her feet perfect and toenails painted pink. He tried to put her out of his head because he knew that they probably would stay in touch for a while, then stop.
Sixteen and seventeen might have only been a year apart, but she was out of high school now, while he had two more years of tardy bells and morning announcements. He’d been held back in the first grade for being a slow reader, so he was just a junior.
“Thanks for taking me around. I liked watching you play ball. Too bad you guys didn’t go to the playoffs.” She sounded genuinely sorry.
“It’s okay. I wasn’t really into it that much this year, anyway.”
“I think I’ll get on a college softball team.”
“That’d be good.”
Jason felt as if all his muscles were too tight for his bones. This was effin’ awkward. All of a sudden, he was shy around her and was struggling with what to say. It sucked.
“Well…” She looked over her shoulder at Drew, who was headed toward the Hummer. “It looks like we’re leaving.”
“Yeah.”
“It was nice meeting you, Jason.”
“Yeah.”
“We’ll call. You have my number.”
“Yeah.”
She grinned, then gave him a hug he wasn’t prepared for. Into his ear, she whispered, “I’ll bet all the girls are going to have a mad crush on you.”
Then she pulled back, waved and went around to her side of the SUV.
Jason watched her drive away, and he kept a stupid slap-happy grin on his face.
Oh yeah. She thinks I’m a stud.
He and Mackenzie Taylor weren’t destined to be boy- and girlfriend, but she sure knew how to make a guy feel like he could get any girl he wanted.
The Hailey Airport, small as it was, didn’t allow anyone, not even if your name was Hemingway, to wait with passengers beyond the security checkpoint.
Mackenzie stood next to Drew, her backpack over her shoulder. He felt strangely nervous. Part of him wished she never had to leave; part of him knew that she had a life in Florida.
About a dozen passengers waited to board her outbound flight. He could see her gate through the security area. She had about five minutes left and then she’d have to go through.
“So you’ll call me when you get to Salt Lake to change planes.” His voice sounded unintentionally clipped.
“I said I would. Don’t worry. I know how to change planes all by myself.” Brows raised, she gave him a placating smile, one filled with light teasing that warmed him to the core.
“I know, sugar. I just want to make sure.” Drew shifted his weight from one foot to the other.
Earlier, he’d given her some cash so she’d have plenty of money to buy something to eat in the airport. He’d even bought a Seventeen magazine for her when she was in the ladies’ room. She’d looked at him as if he was silly, but she’d taken it and given him a hug.
“So you’re all set?” he asked.
“All set.” She patted her backpack. “I’ve got the money and the magazine, I have my iPod and my journal inside.”
“You going to write something on the plane?” he asked.
“I don’t know.” Ah don’t know.
“About me?”
She grinned. “Maybe.”
“Well,” he said, not understanding why he was suddenly so self-conscious about letting her go. Maybe a part of him worried she’d never come back. That her trip had been a fluke, a one-time deal. Something not to be repeated. But they’d made plans and he was sure she wanted to head out to Disneyland and do some other things with him.
Just the same…
He reiterated, “So, Disneyland this fall.”
“Count on it.”
“Great. And maybe some camping in the spring. I’ve got a tent. It’s been awhile since I used it, but I have all the gear. We could take the boat up, find a good spot.”
“That would be fun.”
“Cool. Good.”
She laughed. “I’m coming back. I promise.”
He nodded, his throat feeling dry, and he licked his lips. Over the PA speakers, flight attendants made an announcement that Mackenzie’s flight was ready to board.
“I better go.”
“Yeah…”
Smiling, she gazed into his face. “Thanks for everything.”
He gulped, shook his head, his eyes momentarily closing. “No, thank you. Thank you for giving me a chance.”
“Thank you for giving me a chance,” she said, with such grace and warmth, it was all he could do not to crush her in his arms.
“Well…” she said, her smile waning and emotions swimming in her eyes.
Drew reached out, held her firmly, kissed the top of her head, the soft strands of her hair. “You be good, Mackenzie.”
“I will, Daddy.”
Daddy.
The word was like a balm. It soothed old wounds, made him feel as if he were the best thing on the face of the earth.
“Love you.” He spoke into her hair.
“Love you, too.”
They broke apart; he brushed her smooth cheek. “You’re so pretty, sugar. You tell those boys to stay away from you.”
She laughed, a honeyed sound. “I’m not looking for a boyfriend right now.”
“Good.”
Her flight was called once more and she had to head th
rough the security check. She gave him a final hug and he squeezed her firmly, but gently. Backing out of his arms, she waved, walked to the clearance area and put her backpack on the conveyer.
Drew didn’t move until he watched her wave from the doorway to the boarding ramp. And not even then.
He waited until the small plane taxied and left his view. Only then did he turn around and head home, already missing his little girl.
Journal of Mackenzie Taylor Tolman
From the airplane window, I can see the town of Red Duck disappearing like a small speck in the distance, and somewhere on that gray ribbon of road, my dad is in his Hummer, driving to his house.
He’s going to find Momma’s letter on his bed, just where I left it when he wasn’t looking. It was a letter she wrote to me just before she died, saying she thought it would be a good idea if, when the time came, and I said it would be okay, that I took Daddy’s last name.
Momma said I’d had hers for a long time, and she didn’t mind sharing and letting me use Daddy’s once he and I made our peace.
Momma always hoped we would. I wish she could know right now that we worked things out. I think she does know from Heaven.
I left Drew a note saying I’d like to take Tolman as my last name.
I think my dad will say it’s okay. In fact, I know he’ll be happy about it. Me, too.
He’s going be fine and so am I.
Twenty-Six
The last week in September, the annual Little League dinner at Woolly Burgers wasn’t as lively as it had been in past years, since the team hadn’t gone to the play-offs. But the boys still got achievement awards from their parents and coaches. It was just an off season this year and Drew looked forward to the next one. Before this summer, he would have been bummed out about it, taken on some pressure over not producing a better outcome. But he realized it didn’t matter.
There were so many more things to life than baseball.
“Are you heading out?” Drew asked Lucy as she left her boys with Nutter’s parents.
“Yep. Jason and Matt are spending the night with Nutter and I have the house all to myself tonight. I may just have to stand in the middle of the living room and stare at the ceiling.” She laughed.
He smiled at her, liking the way her teeth contrasted with the darker lipstick she wore. She had on a sleeveless, form-fitting white dress with a scoop neck. It looked nice on her. Some of her tan had faded, but she was a strikingly beautiful woman no matter what her skin tone.
She’d pulled half her hair up into a claw; the rest spilled over her shoulders. The rich brown color had brightened from the sun and strands were highlighted a reddish-bronze.
“You just don’t know how noisy your house is until the kids leave. I never get a day off.” She fitted her purse on her shoulder. “I’m always on duty.”
She didn’t say it with bitterness, but rather fondness. And with a hint of anticipation about not being a parent tonight, but a woman who was going to go home and enjoy her surroundings without parental responsibilities.
“Bye, boys,” she called, waving to them.
“See ya, Mom!” Matt was trying to juggle three baseballs at a time. They fell to the floor and then Jason tried.
Lucy went toward the door and Drew followed. “I’ll walk you to your car.”
The outside air was warm and lazy.
“Actually, I came with Sue and Dave. I told her I was going to walk home.” Lucy gazed at the horizon. “It’s so nice out.”
An Indian summer had crept into September, the day filled with a warm breeze. The sunset was heavy with fall colors, the sky aflame with an orange-and-red wash.
The muted golds reflected on Lucy’s face. He remembered what her body felt like next to his, the way her breasts looked in her bikini top. The scent of her perfume hung in the air.
His heart raced as he thought about how she’d feel up tight to him, flesh to flesh. How it would feel to run his hands across her body right now, the smooth cotton of that dress. Her back and waist, then her butt.
She glanced at him, her eyes darkening as if she was having a thought she struggled with. “How’d you get here?”
“I drove. I can drive you home if you want.”
“Okay.”
The drive to Lucy’s house was short, and neither of them said a word. They didn’t have to. He cut the engine, went around to open the SUV door for her. She hopped down and didn’t look at him.
Lucy could feel the soft cotton of her dress move over her skin as she walked to the porch. A delicious sense of anticipation surged through her body. She stopped at the door, turned to say something—then cut herself off.
Drew leaned toward her, brought his face over hers. She felt her backside pressing into the screen door, and that was the last conscious thought she had as Drew’s mouth covered hers.
They kissed, quick yet lingering.
After a minute, she managed to get the lock open and let him inside. She kicked the door closed with her foot, stood a distance away from him and tried to figure out what exactly was going on.
She knew exactly what was going to happen. And she wanted it to. But she just hadn’t known when or where.
“Can I get you anything to drink?” she offered, the words lame even to her own ears.
He made no reply. He just looked at her as if she were the best boat on the dock—something he wanted. Quite badly.
Her face was flushed and she pushed aside a stray lock that had come loose from her hair claw. She threw her shoulders back and forced herself into a calm she didn’t feel.
Anxiousness churned in the pit of her stomach. Her smile wavered a little. She had a hard time concentrating when he looked at her. She hadn’t been with anyone other than her husband for nineteen years. Nobody since her divorce. This was new.
It must have showed.
He pulled her to him and murmured, with his face in her hair. “I can leave.”
“No,” she said, clinging to his shoulders, not wanting to let him go. Her hand slipped into his jeans and she found him straining against the fabric. “Stay….”
He reached under her dress and began to stroke her thighs and then in between her thighs. A moan rose from her throat when his fingertips reached into her panties. It had been a long time since a man touched her intimately, and she arched her back as the feeling rose and rose. She shut her eyes tight and grabbed on to the front of Drew’s shirt.
“Don’t stop,” she whispered.
Her head started to spin; her mind reached places she’d long since forgotten about. She let herself go, riding the feelings that rose. Suddenly, she let out a cry as a burst of pulsing heat pleasured her body.
Her breathing grew jagged; her legs went numb.
Drew scooped her into his arms, carried her down the hall. She pressed herself to him, eyes closed.
He set her on her feet and undid the nylon zipper of her dress. He pulled it over her head. The dress landed on the floor.
She moved her face to he could kiss her cheek, the corner of her mouth. He stroked her bare back and she shivered.
A dozen different thoughts went through her head. She didn’t want to talk about anything, but she had to say something.
“Drew…I haven’t been with anyone since Gary, and when he had the affair, I made sure that I was okay.” That was the best way she could phrase it without coming right out and saying she’d had a panel of STD tests run on her.
“I know what you mean, Lucy.” He brushed her hair from her forehead. “I did the same after me and Jacquie.”
She nodded.
“And when Mackenzie was fourteen, I got a vasectomy.”
That news pulled Lucy slightly out of the moment. “You did?”
“I should have done it years before.” He kissed her neck softly, his mouth warm. “So I’m okay…if you’re okay with everything.”
“I am….” She reached out and undid the buttons on his fly, then helped him shrug out of his jeans. He kicke
d off his shoes. She undid his soft shirt, and the fabric flowed like a teal-blue river onto the floor.
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