“What is it?” she asked with curiosity.
Victor gave a shrug and moved on into the kitchen. Natalia examined the box, blank except for her name written in a handwritten scrawl across the top. Was it a bomb? She wouldn’t put that past Zigic. It would be an easy way to get rid of her, and her family too. She lifted the box very gently and examined it further. There was no postage attached. No address, no cancelled stamps. “Where did you find this?” she called out to her father.
“On the front step!” he shouted back.
“Who is it from?”
“How should I know?!”
Natalia stood carefully and carried the box to the front door. From a peg on the wall, she took her jacket and slid it on, one sleeve at a time, before stepping outside into the cold evening. A light dusting of snow covered the ground and a few more flakes drifted down from above. Natalia moved across the yard and out into the fields, walking a hundred meters before she stopped and gently set the package down. She took a few steps backwards and stared at it for a while. Could it be from Vitaly? No. Not after what he’d said to her. Not after he’d called her a whore. But who else? She came up with no reasonable answers. Perhaps she should shoot it with the rifle, she thought. If it was a bomb, that would blow it to pieces. Natalia looked around at the gathering darkness. Whoever left it could be watching her even now, yet she saw nobody. She would leave the package where it was until the morning. At least that would give her time to think. It could harm no one out here. Natalia walked back to the house.
The sounds of children playing woke Natalia shortly after dawn, shrieks and laughter echoing from the yard outside. She rose and looked through the bedroom window to see her nephews, bundled up in their winter clothes, playing in a deep blanket of freshly fallen snow. Natalia inhaled, reveling in the clean, crisp whiteness of it all. Winter had finally arrived in earnest. She envied the pure joy of the children, who lived completely in the moment. For Natalia there was reason to celebrate as well. She could finally relax, in some measure. The brutality of eastern winters helped wipe out the Germans at Stalingrad. She couldn’t imagine that Goran Zigic would brave one just for her. While the snow cut her family off from the outside world, it also kept that world at bay, at least until the spring. She remembered the package, buried outside in the snow. She would never find it now. Whatever was inside would have to wait. And if it was a bomb after all? The thought was worrisome, but as long as nobody stepped on it…
“What’s going on?” a dreamy-eyed Rita asked from deep under the covers of her bed.
“Get up and see.”
“Oh, tell me,” Rita pleaded.
“Nope,” Natalia smiled. “I’m going to make you get your lazy butt out of bed!”
In a moment Rita was up at the window too. “Snow!! Real snow!”
“Look at you, like a five-year old!” Natalia laughed.
“I’ll beat you outside!” Rita threw on her clothes and shoes as fast as she could and was out the door in a flash.
Natalia took her time, to prove a point as much as anything, but she had to admit that the excitement was contagious. By the time she made it out into the yard, Rita was in the middle of a spirited snowball fight, taking on both of her nephews at once. A well-aimed shot hit Rita square on the forehead.
“Good throw, Constantine!” said Natalia.
“Hey, whose side are you on?” Rita complained.
“You can’t handle a four year old?” said Natalia.
“Let’s get auntie Natalia!” Rita shouted.
“Yes, auntie Natalia!” Constantine replied with a wicked smile.
“You be careful, Constantine! Don’t over-exert yourself!” she said just before Rita and the children hurled a barrage of snow in her direction, the cold flakes hitting Natalia’s hair and face, and sliding down her neck.
“Oh, you asked for it!” Natalia replied with a grin of her own before chasing the children through the yard as they squealed in delight.
“Why won’t you tell us what was in the package?” Rita pleaded as the family sat at the breakfast table eating toast and fried eggs.
“I don’t know what it is.”
“How could you not have opened it?” Rita was incredulous.
“I’ll bet it was from your boyfriend, Vitaly. Begging you to take him back,” said Ivanka with a huff.
“No,” Natalia shot back. “That’s not possible. Besides, if it was from him, I don’t want it.”
“I’ll bet you have a secret admirer,” Rita speculated. “Someone who knows you’re single again and thinks this is his chance.”
“You are all very optimistic,” said Natalia.
“So where is it, then? This mysterious package? And when are you going to open it?!”
“I am afraid that it will have to wait until the spring.”
“What are you talking about?!” Rita was beginning to sound annoyed.
“It’s under the snow.”
“What do you mean under the snow? Where under the snow?”
“Promise me you won’t try to find it!” Natalia snapped.
“Why not?” pleaded Rita.
“Promise me!”
“What if I stumble upon it?”
“I will find it myself, in the spring!” Natalia demanded.
Rita crossed her arms and pouted.
“You better not go digging around out there when I’m gone!” Natalia added.
“Gone?!” Ivanka perked up. “Where are you going?”
Natalia dropped her chin and looked to the floor. She’d been dreading this conversation, but now she’d let it slip.
“You’re not leaving us again?!” Ivanka pressed.
“I’m only moving into town, that’s all.”
“Into town? Why into town? You don’t like it here with your family?”
“I’ve decided to work for Raisa.” Natalia looked up.
“Raisa…?” her mother let this information settle in.
“She needs help in the restaurant and we need the money, you know it’s true. I’ll live in Sonia’s room six days per week. I can come home on Sundays.” What she didn’t tell them was how compelled she felt to get away from the farm, to live and breathe on her own.
“When will you go?” asked Ivanka.
“Today. I can use my skis.” A somberness settled over the room. Moving into town was not far, but with the isolation of winter, she might as well have been traveling to the other side of the world.
When she’d finished packing her things into a large backpack, Natalia brought it out to the living room where the family was gathered, all except for Constantine who was nowhere to be seen. Natalia knew where to look. She walked to a section of paneling below the staircase and rapped three times with her knuckles. “Constantine, I know you are there. Won’t you say goodbye to me?”
“No!” came a gruff answer from within.
“Please?” she beseeched him, but this time there was no response at all. Natalia knelt down and lifted the panel off to find her nephew curled up in a small hiding space within. “I couldn’t go without saying goodbye to my Constantine.”
“I don’t want you to go!” he shouted as tears streamed down his face.
“I won’t be far. I’ll see you every week,” she replied. “Perhaps you can even come to visit me in town. Would you like that?” At this, he bounded from his place and into Natalia’s arms. She turned her head and kissed him gently on the cheek.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Multinovic arrived at the restaurant every Tuesday like clockwork. This was nothing new to Natalia. She’d been seeing him there for years, but now her perspective was different. After his refusal to help her, Natalia felt a rising bitterness each time she saw him. It was better if there were other customers in the place, to help keep her occupied. On this particular night she did what she could to entice the one other couple in the place to stay a little bit longer, for some coffee or dessert. Anything but leave her alone with that man. But when they
asked for the check, there was nothing more she could do.
After the couple had gone, Natalia cleared the table, unable to avoid shooting a glance at Multinovic. He just sat there, glaring at her as though she owed him something. And why? What did he expect? At one point he seemed about to speak, but then thought better of it. Natalia took her tray of dishes back to the kitchen to wait him out. She knew that when he was ready, he’d simply leave the money and go. Then she could clear his table, sweep and mop the floors and head upstairs, done for the day. But ten minutes later, she was surprised to find Multinovic still sitting there, idly smoking a cigarette. He refused to take his eyes off her as she lifted his empty plate and wine glass.
“I’d like it back please,” he said.
Natalia looked at the empty plate in her hands. “But it’s all gone.”
“You know what I’m talking about,” he answered with a condescending tone. “You’re like everyone else in this town. I thought you were different, somehow. Apparently I was wrong.”
“And what does that mean?” Natalia flashed a hint of anger herself.
“At the very least you could show me some measure of kindness. Instead you ignore me, just like all of the others.”
“I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings.” Natalia was taken aback; shocked by fact that he even had feelings at all. Multinovic appeared unnerved by this tacit admission of loneliness. He fidgeted in his seat uneasily. It was almost enough to make her feel sorry for him, but then he sat up straight in his chair with a blank expression. “Good night, then.” He stood to leave, walking toward the door and lifting his coat from a rack on the way. He put on the coat, zipped up the front was gone, through the door and out into the night. Natalia stood where she was, running the exchange through her mind. What kindness could she possibly owe him? The man had hardly said a word to her in weeks. She looked out the window in the direction he had gone, half expecting him to come back to apologize. But no, he wasn’t the type to ask forgiveness. Natalia walked back into the kitchen with the dishes and tried not think of him anymore, but she was unsettled. She washed his plate, glass and utensils and then took the broom and dustpan into the dining room, trying to concentrate on her tasks at hand. When she was finished with her cleaning she turned off the lights and headed up to her room for the night.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Natalia woke with a start and sat bolt upright in Sonia’s bed. He’d wanted something back. Of course it wasn’t his empty pasta plate. It was the package! The package was from Multinovic! She let this realization sink in. He’d tried to help her after all, with some gesture of good will. And how was it received? With stony silence. The guilt settled upon her, but how was she to know? He could have attached a note! Natalia looked to the clock beside the bed and counted the hours until sunrise. She had to find that box. She got up and moved to the window. Outside, moonlight reflected off the snow-covered streets. She was tempted to go right away. Her Nordic skis leaned against the wall in one corner of the room. It was only ten kilometers away, but it was still very cold outside and if she showed up before dawn her family would think she was crazy. No, she would wait. Three more hours. She climbed back in bed and stared at the ceiling, trying to guess what might be waiting inside that brown cardboard box, buried deep beneath the snow.
Natalia felt the sting of exertion in her lungs as she inhaled the cold morning air and blew it out just as quickly, swinging her arms and legs in time while her skis cut new tracks through a thin white crust. She came over a small rise and she saw the farm laid out below, smoke drifting up from the chimneys. The last half a kilometer was all downhill and Natalia picked up speed, coasting all the way until she came to a stop in front of the main house. To one side she saw shovel marks and indentations. Someone was digging here already. Natalia reached down to unlatch her bindings and then bounded up the steps and through the door. Inside, Victor and Rita sat at the table having breakfast. Both were surprised to see her, but it was Natalia who spoke first. “I know you didn’t find it,” she said to Rita straight out.
“No. I didn’t,” Rita admitted.
“You were looking in the wrong place,” said Natalia.
“So where should I look?!”
“Put your warm clothes on and you can help me. You, too, father.”
“Help you with what?” Victor asked.
Ivanka stuck her head out from the kitchen. “What are you doing home?”
“I came for my package.”
“Have you eaten yet?”
“I’ll eat afterwards.”
“No, you’ll have breakfast first. Sit down,” Ivanka commanded.
Natalia knew that she had no choice. She took off her jacket and hung it by the door before taking a seat at the table. Ivanka went back to the kitchen with an air of contentment.
Natalia passed out a ski pole each to her father, mother and sister. She compared their position to that of the house and then drove her own pole into the snow before poking it up and down.
“What if we step on it?” asked Rita.
“Don’t worry about that, just help me look,” Natalia countered.
Her mother and father lasted ten minutes before giving up and heading back inside. It was a fool’s errand as far as they were concerned, trying to find some mysterious gift from an unknown admirer. Rita stuck it out, driven by purpose and the promise of romance. “You know who it’s from, don’t you? You can tell me,” said Rita. “I’ll keep your secret, honest.”
“You’d probably never believe me anyway.”
“Oh, come on!” Rita looked up expectantly.
“Gregor Multinovic,” Natalia admitted.
“Multinovic!” Rita gasped in horror. “The rapist?!”
“He’s not a rapist,” said Natalia with a sigh. “At least I don’t think so.”
“I heard he was a rapist, and a murderer, too. The only reason he’s living here is because he’s hiding. Everyone knows that if they try to turn him in, he’ll kill them.”
“Come on, do you really believe that stuff? It’s all just talk.”
“You actually like him, don’t you?” Rita was still in shock.
“No, I don’t like him…” Natalia stammered. “That’s not what this is about.”
“Then why are you so excited? You like him! You and he…you aren’t???”
“Rita! What kind of question is that?”
“What kind of answer is that?”
“I hardly know the man!”
“It hasn’t stopped him before.” Rita watched her sister’s reaction for clues.
“That’s enough.” Natalia poked along in the snow. “Are you going to help me or not?!”
Rita shrugged. “If you want to date a rapist, that’s your business.”
After some time, Natalia felt her pole strike something unusual, almost as though she’d hit an air pocket, yet not quite. She pulled the pole out and knelt down to look in the hole. All she could see was snow and shadows.
“What is it? What did you find?” Rita exhaled plumes of frost with each excited breath.
“I don’t know.” Natalia dug with her gloved hands until she’d cleared a layer of snow from the top of the cardboard box.
“That’s it! That’s it!” Rita shouted.
“Shhh,” said Natalia. “Keep it down.”
“What for?”
“I don’t know…” Natalia scooped more snow out of the hole. “Let’s see what it is first.” Rita dropped to her knees to help dig until they managed to pull the box up and out. Natalia placed it on the snow and the two of them sat staring.
“Are you going to open it?” Rita couldn’t hide her impatience.
“What if it’s personal?”
“Oh, come on!” Rita complained. “Just open the box!”
Natalia took off a glove and then used one finger to carefully poke a hole in the top. She worked open the brittle, weathered tape from one side to the other and then pulled up one of the flaps.
“W
hat is it?” Rita strained to see. “If it’s chocolates I want some!”
Natalia reached a hand inside and pulled out a note scrawled in a man’s uneven handwriting. “For ammunition, come see me. G.M.” Resting in the bottom of the box was a gun. Natalia lifted it out carefully. A black pistol with a plastic grip and a shiny steel barrel.
“A gun? What kind of present is that? Who gives a girl a gun?! Though at least if he tries to rape you now, you can shoot him!” Rita laughed.
“It’s what I asked for,” Natalia marveled.
“You asked that man for a gun?” Rita looked at her sister in disbelief.
“Maybe it’s best if mother and father don’t know about this. They’re worried enough about me already.”
“Can you blame them?”
Natalia looked slightly perturbed. “Just don’t say anything. We didn’t find the package, all right?”
“Fine, but if I were you, I’d stay as far away from that lunatic as you can.”
“That’s not your business.” Natalia slipped the gun in her jacket pocket and placed the box back in its hole, covering it over with snow.
Chapter Twenty-Five
This time as she approached the dilapidated warehouse, Natalia didn’t hesitate. In her left hand she held a brown paper bag. The other hand she used to knock firmly on the aged wooden door. A small security camera stared down at her from above. Somewhere inside, Gregor Multinovic was watching. After what seemed like a long pause, Natalia heard the lock buzz. She pushed the door; solid and heavy on its hinges. A dim entryway was lit by a single bulb from above. The walls, ceiling and floor were all covered in dust.
It was only once the door closed behind her that Natalia felt pangs of trepidation. The small foyer she found herself in was roughly three meters square. She moved ahead to another door, but when she tried this knob she found that it was locked, leaving her trapped in the dusty little ante chamber. “Hey, this isn’t funny!” she shouted, but then the inner door opened to reveal Multinovic standing before her. He wore a set of blue coveralls, the type one might find on an auto mechanic. His tousled hair was uncombed.
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