by Jeff Kass
The anger management class I took was helpful in many ways. I feel the instructors were well qualified [sic] for this class and the class size was not too big. I learned several things about how drugs and alcohol contribute to violence, and how to avoid using drugs and alcohol. I felt like the class was focused more on people who had committed violent crimes and people who use drugs and alcohol, rather than being more broad. Nevertheless I still learned what anger is, how to recognize it, and how to deal with it. Violence is expensive, along with anger. Committing violent crimes brings forth fees, bills, and punishment that have very deep affects on that person, not to mention the emotional turmoil it causes . . . I believe the most valuable part of this class was thinking up ideas for ways to control anger and for ways to release stress in a non-violent manner. Things such as writing, taking a walk, talking, lifting weights, listening to different music, and exercising are all good ways to vent anger. We also discussed the positive and negative results of anger and violence . . . I feel that all of the suggestions can all be helpful, but the main part of anger management comes from the individual. If the person does not want to control his/her anger, then it can be a problem. The person must want to control his/her anger and actually want to not be violent or angry. It all starts in the person’s mind. I have learned that thousands of suggestions are worthless if you still believe in violence. I am happy to say that with the help in this class, and several other diversion-related experiences, I do want to try to control my anger.
But Kriegshauser wrote a different conclusion on December 1, 1998 in Eric’s diversion file. “Eric honestly reported that he felt like the class was something of a waste of time. He had heard most of it ect.”
∞
Kriegshauser struck a couple programs from Eric and Dylan’s diversion menu. One was criminal justice class, which is about six hours on a Saturday and costs $60, according to Kriegshauser. In an auditorium, maybe one hundred kids speak with youths from a juvenile detention facility. “They will talk about making more appropriate choices, and they will talk about being less destructive to themselves,” Kriegshauser explained. “It’s basically just kind of think before you act.” Kriegshauser dropped it because “it was more gang-related and just didn’t fit who they [Eric and Dylan] were.”
Kriegshauser also decided Eric did not need the life skills class he had been assigned. “He demonstrated to me that he had life skills under control,” Kriegshauser told the attorneys gathered round him in the deposition. “He was pretty responsible and he was respectful and he thought of consequence of action, generally. He never had a major concern with that stuff. Or at least never showed any. So I put on, instead of that class, an adult legal issues packet, which was a packet intended to get—intended to get him to start thinking about if he continued criminal behavior, what could happen to him once he was an adult, based on the fact he was getting ready to graduate.”
In that exercise, both Eric and Dylan were asked to explain certain crimes and penalties. It seems Columbine was on their minds. Dylan’s example for disorderly conduct was, “Billy Bob sets off a smoke bomb in a library.” For “complicity” he wrote, “Rashib tells Samir how to make a bomb, but only Samir detonates it.”
For accessory to a crime, Eric wrote, “Bobby murders Johny [sic]. Bobby’s older brother, Billy, throws the shotgun used in the murder into a lake . . . ”
For disorderly conduct Eric wrote, “Bob and his AK-47 go downtown and he fires off a few shots while yelling ‘LET’S FIGHT.’”
“It’s about making appropriate choices with friends,” Kriegshauser explained, and Eric thought the course was interesting because he “discovered things that he did not know.”
Sanchez had required Eric to continue his psychological counseling, and Kriegshauser agreed with the move. “I figure the parent must have seen something or something occurred,” he said, and added, “My thought is they are already working on those issues, the family is responsible enough to take care of that on their own. If there’s a problem, right or wrong, my theory is they will let me know if there’s a concern.”
Kriegshauser added, “Nobody in the office in diversion is a mental health professional.”
If the diversion program refers a child for counseling, Kriegshauser said he would maintain contact with the counselor, but not otherwise. Kriegshauser never initiated any contact with Eric’s psychologist, Kevin Albert. Nor did Albert contact him.
But Kriegshauser did speak with Eric about his counseling. “And he [Eric] said he was doing great,” Kriegshauser recalled. “He said he thought the medications were working. He had no continued real temper control problems. He felt real stable. And I said, ‘Well, if you have any problems, let me know, because we want to get you—get whatever needs to be modified if you continue to have problems with that.’”
As of January 19, 1999, three months before Columbine, Eric told Kriegshauser he had one more counseling session left. If Kriegshauser felt the counseling was not going well, he said he would not have let Eric out of diversion.
Eric always maintained a steady mood, Kriegshauser says. He never seemed to be drunk or high, and never started rambling conversations with strangers. He never lost his temper or seemed abnormally irritable. Aside from his complaints about government, Kriegshauser never knew Eric to be violent or express hatred toward any person or group. Eric did not indicate he thought he was better than anyone else. He didn’t seem obsessive compulsive. He didn’t pace, shake, or tremble. He didn’t appear hyperactive or depressed.
Some things never came up in conversation with Eric and Dylan, such as Nazism, bullying, or school authority figures. They never discussed sex, a topic Kriegshauser said he would normally bring up only if it was an issue, such as a teen pregnancy. Kriegshauser did not discuss the break-in with the boys, and they did not talk about their older brothers.
Kriegshauser estimated he met with Eric and Dylan together at least five times, a practice altered since Columbine since one boy can influence the other, the theory goes, and prevent the counselor from getting a proper read on the client. Another five times he met with them separately. Kriegshauser described the interaction between Eric and Dylan as “appropriate.” Once when Kriegshauser “confronted” Dylan over his grades, Eric was there. “And Eric seemed absolutely appropriate in his response to that. Not that he was active in it, but he wasn’t making excuses for Dylan. He wasn’t—he was, like, yes, yes. And Dylan responded very appropriately. He was remorseful when he was around. Their demeanor together was just like it was when they were apart, respectful.”
Kriegshauser did not believe either boy was more open with him when they were alone. “I thought I was getting good information at all times,” he said. Kriegshauser was asked if he thought Dylan was shy. “No, not particularly,” he answered.
Kriegshauser has difficulty pinpointing how much Eric and Dylan each paid in diversion and ledgers in the files are confusing. But Kriegshauser estimates they paid $300 in court fees alone, not including the various programs such as Eric’s anger management. Kriegshauser believes Eric paid for the program himself, something he hopes every juvenile does, “because they are the ones that do something wrong.” But he cannot enforce that philosophy, and parents pay for their children if they want.
John DeCamp, the attorney for injured Columbine student Mark Taylor, whose lawsuit sparked the deposition, briefly chimed in during the session. While questions from the Solvay attorney took up about 140 of the 167 deposition pages, DeCamp took up only eight. After confirming that Eric was “one impressive young man,” DeCamp asked Kriegshauser what may have made him “so to speak, go off the deep end.”
“I have no idea,” Kriegshauser said. “When he left my program, he seemed absolutely appropriate and responsible. I have no idea what made this occur.”
DeCamp asked Kriegshauser if he saw any leader between the two. He didn’t. DeCamp asked about Eric and Dylan’s
love of video games, namely Doom. Kriegshauser said the game came up when he mentioned he was looking for “fun things to do” on his computer, and Eric and Dylan gave him a “Doom Bible.” Kriegshauser said he kept it for a bit, then gave it back because it was inappropriate for him to accept gifts.
DeCamp noted that no one had mentioned the medication Eric switched to after taking Zoloft. Indeed, it seems Luvox was never mentioned during questioning by Luvox attorney Andrew Efaw, which may be exactly what he wanted.
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January 19, 1999. Three months and one day before Columbine. Kriegshauser met with both Eric and Dylan. He also contacted Tom and Sue Klebold because he was concerned about Dylan’s looming D in calculus. But the Klebolds raised another issue. They wanted Kriegshauser to tell Dylan he could get in trouble for any hijinks.
“It’s an interesting conversation,” Kriegshauser elaborated in his deposition.
The Klebolds said it looked like Dylan was “on track” and they were looking at colleges.
“OK. My intention is to early terminate him,” Kriegshauser told the parents. “Do you feel OK with that?’”
“Yes, we feel OK with that,” the Klebolds replied. “By the way, would you mention to him about high school pranks, senior pranks, because we’re concerned he might do something that would mess his chances for college, or something like that, up.”
“OK, sure,” Kriegshauser said. “I’ll talk to him.”
There is no other indication in the deposition as to why the Klebolds thought Dylan might pull a senior prank.
Kriegshauser met the next day with Eric and Dylan together. Kriegshauser said he gave Eric (and we would assume Dylan) some version of the general termination speech. They talked about the paperwork, and Kriegshauser asked their thoughts on the program, good and bad, so he could improve it. “And we talk about make [sic] sure they stay focused,” Kriegshauser said. “You know, they done good to get off diversion and continuing that would be beneficial. And, basically, keeping their eye on the ball.”
Kriegshauser told Dylan “to be very careful about choices in the future especially since he is nearing graduation.” He talked to Eric “about making good choices in the future.”
Kriegshauser did not have the final decision on letting Eric and Dylan terminate early. He had to send the case to a team of three other officers and the program director. As the forwarding officer, he said, he did not have a vote. The others depend on the file for their decision. Kriegshauser also noted that Magistrate DeVita, who had questioned the boys before they entered the program, signed off on the early release.
Kriegshauser “terminated” Eric and Dylan from diversion early on February 3, 1999. On the last day he met with them, he might have learned their nicknames, Vodka and Rebel. “I have a bulletin board in my office,” he said in his deposition. “And when I was out getting their paperwork, they individually took my—one of those plastic pin things you stick up on a thing, and they put out a V and an R. And I said, ‘What’s that? Well, it’s just something to remember us by. Really? What does it mean?’ And I recall them saying, ‘virtual reality.’ But they might have said Vodka and Rebel. Now, I don’t know. But that’s the only time I ever knew about it.”
In terminating Dylan, Kriegshauser wrote a one-page report and noted that Dylan did “a very nice job.” His attitude was “solid and he remained motivated.” The most effective part of the program seemed to be the community service. “He learned a lot from having to give up free time to work for no money.” Dylan struggled with staying motivated in school, but maintained a good G.P.A.
His “prognosis” read: “Good. Dylan is a bright young man who has a great deal of potential. If he is able to tap his potential and become self motivated [sic] he should do well in life.” The report ended with, “He needs to strive to self motivate [sic] himself so he can remain on a positive path. He is intelligent enough to make any dream a reality but he needs to understand hard work is part of it.”
Eric’s “successful early termination” report was equally upbeat. “Eric did a very nice job on Diversion,” Kriegshauser wrote. Eric’s report continued: “PROGNOSIS: Good. Eric is a very bright young man who is likely to succeed in life. He is intelligent enough to achieve lofty goals as long as he stays on task and remains motivated.”
In the deposition, Kriegshauser was asked to elaborate on those comments. “He [Eric] seemed to have some goals,” Kriegshauser replied. “We talked about goals. He seemed to listen. He just seemed like a kid who was going to do pretty darn good.”
Under “Recommendations,” Kriegshauser typed out: “Eric should seek out more education at higher levels. He impressed me as being very articulate and intelligent. These are skills that he should grow and use as frequently as possible.”
In the deposition, Kriegshauser also said of his termination report, “Well, these are funny, because successful terminations nobody ever reads. So this is more talking to the air. But basically, Eric impressed me as a very, very bright kid. And we don’t see an incredible amount of bright kids. Nothing personal to the other kids that aren’t bright or incredibly bright. And it seems to me that when someone comes across as very articulate or intelligent, those people would benefit from striving to push themselves to higher levels.”
Gun Show
In the spring of 1998, Eric and Dylan were entering diversion. But as Dylan wrote in Eric’s yearbook, “the holy April morning of NBK,” was in their sights. “We, the gods, will have so much fun w. NBK!! killing enemies, blowing up stuff, killing cops!!” Dylan added. He made an apparent reference to the van break-in: “My wrath for January’s incident will be godlike. Not to mention our revenge in the commons.’” The commons, or cafeteria, is where they would place 20-pound propane bombs the day of the shootings. It was still one year away, but Dylan’s rage seems to have gelled.
Eric returned the favor. He wrote in Dylan’s yearbook, “God I can’t wait till they die. I can taste the blood now—NBK . . . You know what I hate? MANKIND!!!! . . . kill everything . . . kill everything” Eric wrote “die,” “beat,” and “worthless,” or an ‘X,’ on the photo of almost every student in his yearbook.
∞
In his last summer alive, Dylan quit Blackjack to take a job at Computer Renaissance that would pay over five dollars an hour. His résumé listed a variety of qualifications, including, “Built my personal computer & helped build those of friends & family.” His sole reference was Columbine computer instructor Rich Long.
Eric took a second job at Tortilla Wraps in Littleton, where he worked with Nate Dykeman. His job references included Sue Klebold and Columbine English teacher Jason Webb, a favorite for whom Eric had bought a Christmas present. On the job, Eric appeared both normal and exemplary. He dressed in jeans and tennis shoes, and never lost his temper. He was also “a really good worker and a person who was a nice guy with the customers,” according to manager David Cave.
Another manager recommended a raise for Eric because he was “one of her best employees. He was always on time and worked hard.”
Eric returned to school, like any senior, eager to finish. “I will experience several new subjects, review several old ones, and no doubt learn many new an useful things that will help me in life,” he wrote in an essay titled “Great Senior Expectations.” “In general, I am expecting to learn to express my opinions in a civilized, respectable manner.” But he also noted, “I expect my senior year to be full of surprises.”
In other essays, Eric focused on guns, Hitler, and general mayhem. “How many people can a football stadium hold? Can it hold fifty, sixty thousand? Most stadiums can,” he asked in a comprehensive, well-written, multi-page research paper. “Now, picture a stadium filled, not just seats but the field and all the air above it, with dead men, women, and children. That is just a fraction of the casualties inflicted by the Third Reich. The Third Reich almost completely wiped out the
Jewish population in Europe. Now in our minds, that is utterly inhumane, immoral, and evil, but in the Nazi’s minds, it was perfectly fine to exterminate an entire race.
“Sometimes, twisted Nazi officers would line up prisoners and fire a rifle round into the first just to see how many chests it would go through,” Eric recounted.
Eric calmly notes that “in Nazi Germany all mentally disabled people or people with ‘incurable mental defectives’ were killed.” Months earlier, he had already translated those themes to his diary:
KILL all retards, people w/ brain fuck ups, drug adics, people cant figure out how to use a fucking lighter. Geeeawd! People spend millions of dollars on saving the lives of retards, and why I don’t buy that shit like, “oh he’s my son though!” so the fuck what, he aint normal, kill him. put him out his misery . . . “but he is worth the time, he is human too” no he isnt, if he was then he would swallow a bullet cause he would realize what a fucking waste and burden he was.
Elsewhere, Eric privately laid out his Nazi fascination.
I love the nazis too . . . by the way, I fucking cant get enough of the swastika, the SS and the iron cross. Hitler and his head boys fucked up a few times and it cost them the war, but I love their beliefs and who they were, what they did, and what they wanted.
Eric was also giving his thoughts on Columbine:
someones bound to say “what where they thinking?” when we go NBK or when we were planning it, so this is what I am thinking. “I have a goal to destroy as much as possible so I must not be sidetracked by my feelings of sympathy, mercy, or any of that, so I will force myself to believe that everyone is just another monster from Doom . . . , so it’s either me or them. I have to turn off my feelings.” keep this in mind, I want to burn the world, I want to kill everyone except about 5 people, who I will name later, so if you are reading this you are lucky you escaped my rampage because I wanted to kill you.