by Ashe Barker
"I'm not talking about God's creatures. I'm telling you what it means to be a vampire."
She covered her ears and buried her face in the pillow. "I will not listen. This is sacrilege."
"No, it's not sacrilege. It's a simple fact. I can prove it to you if I have to."
"No, I do not wish to see those fangs again. Ever."
"Look at me, Jane."
"I will not."
"Jane, look at me," he repeated, though injecting that note of authority into his command this time.
It had the desired effect and she turned her face toward him.
Ged continued. "I suspect you'll have no choice about catching sight of my fangs if we're to spend any length of time together, but for now, how about this for evidence?" He disappeared without warning, to reappear at the foot of the bed.
Jane's head swiveled between the spot she last saw him, and his current position. She scrambled back against the headboard, her hands held out before her as though to ward him off.
"You are a sorcerer, or you are playing cruel tricks on me. This is ungodly..."
"Probably. I'm rather past worrying about that side of things, to be honest." He came to sit back on the bed beside her, though this time she made no move towards him. "Place your palm on your chest. Just there." He pointed to a spot just below her left breast. When she did not move he reached for her hand and pressed it to her body. "What do you feel?"
"I do not understand. What am I supposed to feel?"
"Tell me. Inside your own body, Jane, what do you feel?"
"My heart. It is beating."
He lifted one eyebrow, grinned at her. "Pounding, more like. I can hear it."
"You cannot," she breathed.
"Believe me, I can. We vampires are not exactly hard of hearing, another perk I suppose. Now, give me your hand."
"I will not."
"Do as I say, Jane." His voice had hardened again. It was deliberate, he would have her compliance. Ged held out his hand and waited until she placed hers in it, then he pressed her palm against his own chest. "What do you feel there?"
"I… I am not certain."
"Concentrate. What do you feel, Jane?"
She waited, her brow creasing. She looked up, met his steady azure gaze.
"I feel nothing."
"Check again, yourself, then me. Be sure, Jane."
She obeyed, shifting her palm from side to side on his chest as she sought to locate a heartbeat. At last she raised her eyes to his once more. "Nothing. I can feel no heartbeat."
He nodded. "That's right. I have no heartbeat. I suppose by the usual definitions, human definitions, I am not alive."
"You are a ghost?"
He chuckled. She seemed bent upon grasping at any explanation but the one he offered. "I am flesh and blood, like you. But my body has been altered. I am—different. You've seen some of it—my fangs, the fact that I don't age, the teleporting—"
"The what?"
"Sorry. The disappearing and reappearing somewhere else. It's a handy little trick, saves a fortune in petrol."
"I have no notion what you are talking about."
"No, I know you don't. I apologise." He paused for a few moments, considering how best to proceed. "It's all too much for you to take in. In fact, I think it's time I stopped telling you about myself, and stopped trying to convince you this is the twenty-first century. It's time I started to show you instead. I seem to remember I promised you a shopping trip. Are you up for that?"
"I... do not think—"
"I do. Come on. We're going out."
He grabbed her hand and tugged her from the bed. She still wore his over-sized red T shirt and the smallest pair of jeans he'd been able to find. The makeshift outfit swamped her but Ged thought she looked adorable. And utterly fuckable, though that would have to wait. He loved the way she looked in his clothes but, some stuff of her own wouldn't go amiss. He headed for the bedroom door, towing his reluctant companion behind him.
"Where are you taking me? I do not wish to go anywhere. I prefer to remain here."
"Not happening. You'll love this, I promise." He hoped he was right. What he had in mind would either delight her, or send her into a complete meltdown. He offered up thanks to a God he had not believed in for almost as long as he could remember, for late night shopping malls.
"But, where—?"
"Edinburgh." It was the closest major city to Roseworth, and the Ocean Terminal Shopping Centre overlooking the waterfront was exactly what he needed to demonstrate the wonders of this age. They could browse the shops, choose some things for her. Then they could eat—or she could. They might even take in a movie. He wondered if 3D might be going just a touch too far, at least for her first excursion into the twenty-first century. They had reached the kitchen and he handed her the trainers he'd dug out, again the smallest he could lay his hands on but far too big for her.
"But, Edinburgh is two whole days' ride from here," she protested as she pulled the shoes onto her feet and attempted to secure them with the laces.
Ged crouched to tie the shoes for her. "No, we'll be there in a couple of hours. You'll see. Trust me.” He stood and dropped a quick kiss on her forehead.
Jane gaped at him, astonished.
"What?" Ged was at a loss.
"You never kissed me before. Not even once."
"More fool me," he muttered as he handed her a warm fleece jacket and shepherded her through the door to the outside. "It's bloody freezing out there. Put that on and zip up tight."
Jane just stood still in the open doorway, shivering and peering at the unfamiliar garment. He grinned to himself as he took it back from her, poked her arms into the sleeves and fastened the jacket.
"Come on, my lady. Your carriage awaits."
Chapter Seven
It was a nervous Jane who followed this man who resembled her husband so closely yet was so fundamentally different. He led her across the paved area in front of the castle ruins and over to the new outbuilding she had noticed when she came outside before. The door still stood open, but she could no longer see the interior because night had fully fallen. Ged stepped through the entrance, halted for a moment, then the whole place lit up.
Jane recoiled, horrified.
"It is ablaze!" she cried, seeking to grab Ged and haul him back to safety.
"What?" He returned to her and gave her a quick hug. "I just turned on the lights so that we could see what we were doing. This is the future, remember. We no longer fumble around in the gloom once the sun sets. Didn't you see that before we came out? There are lights on in the house, too."
"I… I did not notice." She peered inquisitively around his shoulder and through the door. "It is just in this building, this light you have created?"
"Yes, but you'll see lights everywhere as we drive."
"As we...?"
"Come on."
Ged marched inside the brightly illuminated structure now and over to a metallic cart of some description. It had wheels, she could clearly recognise those, and as Jane followed Ged she saw it contained seats. Her husband produced a small device from somewhere about his person and pointed it at the cart. She heard a clicking sound, and lights flashed on the front of the conveyance. Ged opened a door in the side and gestured her to enter it.
"I am not sure..."
"Get in, Jane. This is a car. It moves, quite fast as it happens, and will get us to Edinburgh in a fraction of the time you've been accustomed to. It's quite safe, I assure you."
"How can this be safe?"
"Jane, do as I say." Again, that note of command. Jane swallowed hard, then obeyed.
She clambered into the car and settled into the seat he indicated. Ged closed her door then walked around the front and got in on the other side. He leaned across to fasten a wide strap across her chest and waist, effectively securing her into the seat.
"It's the law, " he offered by way of explanation.
Jane remained silent, her fingers twisting togeth
er in her lap. She was terrified. As she sat there, strapped to her seat and trembling, Ged leaned forward and did something. She was uncertain just what he did and too scared to ask him, but the carriage started to emit a low, continuous rumble and vibrated beneath her. Then slowly, it started to move forward.
Jane clutched the solid framework in front of her and clung on. She sat beside her husband not speaking, her body hunched as she peered through the glass in front of her eyes. The conveyance gathered speed and she gasped.
"Would you like me to slow down?" offered Ged. She glanced at him and could tell by his anxious expression that he was wondering if he had done the right thing in bringing her out. Perhaps if she asked him he would agree to return her to the relative safety of Roseworth? She was on the point of suggesting just that when they reached a place where there appeared to be more buildings. And people. These were the first, besides her husband, that she had encountered in this century. She gaped at them as they passed.
"That woman, why is she pushing that cart?"
Ged's reply came easily. "That's a baby buggy, for carrying a small child."
"Oh." Sure enough, as they passed the woman Jane craned her neck and could plainly see the infant seated within the tiny carriage. "The woman is wearing trews, as I am."
"Jeans. But yes, most women wear jeans and trousers as often as not. For warmth, and practicality."
"Is there no difference, then, between male and female clothing in this time?"
"Yes, there is. You'll see that. But the differences are probably not as great as you've been accustomed to. People nowadays, men or women, can pretty much wear what they like."
"There are more carriages, such as this one. I see them everywhere."
"Just wait till we hit the A1," muttered Ged.
"Am I asking too many questions, my lord? You seem irritated." The familiar despondency started to creep up on her. Gerard was always busy, always occupied. He rarely had time to talk but she was buzzing with curiosity.
He turned to glance across at her, offering a smile which was both warm and reassuring. "No, Janey, I'm not irritated and I apologise if I let you think that. I brought you out so that you could start to see something of this time. Ask me anything you want."
Incredulous, Jane opted to take advantage of this unfamiliar but wholly acceptable new trait in her usually dour husband. The next forty minutes were packed with a barrage of questions as she observed the sights and sounds of this bizarre place and time. She quizzed him about the other carriages similar to that which they occupied, the people she saw on the streets, the buildings of all shapes and sizes, many brightly lit, some swathed in darkness. All elicited a stream of comment and queries from her which Ged sought to satisfy. She was at once intrigued, enraptured, curious and fascinated. As they picked up speed she knew she really ought to be afraid, but the carriage moved with such smooth grace, and her husband appeared to be in effortless control. Jane was amazed to find she could actually sit back and relax.
Then it hit her, the realisation that she was actually enjoying herself. She turned to gaze at her husband's profile as he steered their swift conveyance along the seemingly endless smooth track which was edged by lights on both sides. A stream of equally speedy carriages passed them going the other way, and from time to time one would overtake them. She could no longer make out much of her surroundings because it was too dark, and they were moving too fast. But still, this was fun.
"Thank you, " she said.
He smiled at her again, though without looking her way. "You're welcome."
As they reached the outskirts of the city Jane pressed her face against the glass in the window beside her, beyond wonder now at the sights she beheld. Everywhere she looked she saw lights, people, activity. She had visited Edinburgh but once before, when she went there with Richard and Anne. The city had teemed with folk then. It had been fast, noisy but bore no comparison to what she observed now. All around them the streets were busy, bustling, quite crazy.
"We could skirt around the outside to reach the shopping mall, but I'm going to drive you through the centre. You'll be able to see the castle, and you might recognise that. I want you to see the differences though, help you to understand how much has changed."
"I believe I am already starting to properly appreciate that, my lord. Where did you say was our destination?"
"I'm not a lord here, Jane. Just Ged will do. We're going to a shopping mall. I suppose you might call that a market or fair, but this one is much, much bigger than anything you've seen before. There'll be lots of people, but you'll stay close to me and you'll be fine."
"I know that, my lord."
"Janey..." His tone held a warning, though with no hint of threat.
Jane laughed. "I meant Ged. I must try to become accustomed to this new husband of mine."
Ged did not answer that, but Jane was struck by the impact of her artless comment. She did indeed find herself in the company of a man who was her husband but whom she hardly recognised. Even more shocking, despite the fangs and the devilish wizardry, she was starting to think she might like him.
*****
"It is the same. It is just as I remember it." Jane gazed up at the rocky outcrop upon which perched the magnificent and largely intact Edinburgh castle. The ancient fortress, once the seat of power in Scotland, now, she gathered from Ged's explanation more ceremonial in function, stood essentially unchanged. The timelessness of the proud stone structure, surrounded as it now was by a modern city which sprawled at its feet, served to convince her that the old and the new could co-exist. Perhaps, if the castle itself could adapt and survive, maybe she might, also.
Ged stopped their car and invited her to get out. Together they gazed up at the stern façade, and she did not flinch when he draped an arm across her shoulders. "I came here as a boy, and often as a man to parley with the Duke of Albany on behalf of the King."
"I was here on occasion too, with Richard and the Duchess. I wonder if we were in the castle at the same time."
"Perhaps. I don't recall."
"No, I suppose not." Jane's new-found confidence and optimism started to evaporate.
"What does that mean?"
The sharpness of his question threw her. "My lord?"
"You're unhappy. Tell me why."
"I am not unhappy, my lord. I just—"
"We agreed that you'd drop the title. And please don't even think about lying to me. One of the other helpful characteristics of vampires is our ability to detect the thoughts and emotions of humans. Your sadness is coming off you in waves, I can almost taste it. A moment ago you were fine, then something shifted. So I shall ask you again, why are you unhappy? You may choose to tell me, or I shall simply probe deeper and uncover the reasons for myself."
"Probe deeper? What do you mean?"
He turned to her and took her jaw between his palms to tilt her face up. "Look at me, Janey, and don't look away until I'm done."
"Gerard, please..." Despite her trepidation, she could no more tear her eyes from his than she could sprout wings and fly around the castle battlements. Her knees shook as she experienced an odd sensation. Lightheadedness mingled with an acute awareness of emotions she had long sought to bury and to deny. She had suppressed her pain and disillusionment over the years of her marriage as the reality was too hurtful to face, but the whole of it gushed forth now like some well which had been uncapped. She let out a small cry, horrified at the ugliness she sensed. Jealousy, bitterness, resentment, regret, anger—all were there, displayed before her husband like bolts of cloth at a trader's stall.
There was more too, more intimate yet. Disappointment, self-loathing, humiliation and her own helpless need paraded before him, the evidence of the rage she had felt which she had turned back in on herself. Her husband did not desire her, he never had. She knew this, had known it from the very start, but she was powerless to change anything in her situation. So she had watched, silent, aching with her own unmet desires as he took h
is pleasure elsewhere. And she dreaded the day which would surely come when he would set her aside for another wife, one who might be more to his liking and who would give him the heirs he required.
It seemed to Jane that time stood still while he rifled through her most private thoughts, examining the secrets she had concealed for years, the feeble defenses which had served her as well as they might. But at last, he seemed satisfied. He lowered his forehead to hers, allowing her to close her eyes and shut him out again. It was too late though, much too late. He had seen.
"What a fucking mess we made of it, Jane. Well, I did. Will you let me make it right?"
"I do not understand."
"You will. I promise things will be different between us in the future. I was a green lad then, callow and with no knowledge to speak of. But no longer. We have a second chance here. Shall we take it?"
“Green lad? You were not a callow youth, you were a man grown, ten years older than I.”
“I was still a fool.” He paused, appeared to be considering his next words. At last he met her gaze. “In the centuries since we last saw one another I have fucked more women than I can recall—human, vampire, even a couple of witches, though not at the same time.” He gave a wry smile. “I know my limitations.”
“You were ever a man with a wandering eye.”
“I was, this is true. I’ve had many lovers and my tastes are not exactly ordinary. You know this, you saw my play room already. I’ve learned a lot over the centuries, Janey, about women, about myself, about desire and the convoluted nature of lust. I fully accept that the failings of our marriage were mine, not yours. I treated you badly, ignored your needs and wishes, but by the time I fully appreciated what a gem I had, you were gone. You were lost to me. I never expected to see you again, so I moved on.”
“You were unfaithful whilst we were still together. I know you were. I saw, heard… all those little children running around, they looked just like you. And all the while my own babies lay buried in our church yard.”
“I know that, and I’m sorry, for what it’s worth now.” He stopped and swore under his breath, a string of curses as obscene as anything she had ever heard from him.