by Meg Xuemei X
As I absorbed the god’s essence, I could feel my tissues and bones knitting back together. I could finally breathe freely.
Deimos’s violet eyes widened in raw, undiluted fear. It was a delicious irony to see him, the god who pumped fear into every mortal’s and immortal’s heart, cower and quake in fear.
“Don’t drain me, please!” he begged, while Phobos sobbed beside him.
“Oh, don’t cry, you big babies,” I said pitilessly. “Your father didn’t want me to figure out where I fit on the food chain, but I just did.”
My hair where they’d torn it from my head grew back, shiner than ever.
My bad eye that hadn’t been able to open now gazed at my mates, radiating violet light.
Deimos sprawled on the ground where our blood mixed and flowed. There was no light or fight left in his eyes. His skin dulled to the color of sour milk.
“No, Deimos,” Phobos cried. “Please, no.”
“I’ve drained him down to the last drop of his life force.” I turned to Alaric. “Will you do me the honor now, my mate?”
“No, please!” Phobos screamed. “Stop!”
I could be crueler than the gods if necessary, and I was showing Phobos just that. We were at war, and the gods had taught me what that meant.
A menacing smile lit Alaric’s face. The demigod raised his flaming blade high. One sweep, and he decapitated Deimos.
I felt the essence of the God of Fear dissipate into nothingness.
Phobos tore his gaze from Deimos’s head to me, his wild, red-rimmed eyes full of pure hate. “You killed him, you bitch,” he said. “You killed my only brother!”
“The world doesn’t need to embrace any more fear, in my humble opinion,” I said.
“That’s revolutionary.” Lorcan blinked, as if waking from an unbelievable dream. “We’ve just discovered a way to kill the second-tier gods. We let Cass drain them first, and then we take their heads.”
“We can try it on Apollo, as well,” Pyrder said positively.
“It might not work on a major god,” Alaric said.
There was one major god in this torture chamber. I swept my gaze to Demeter and caught fear flicking in her gray eyes.
“I won’t touch you or Artemis,” I said. “I never forget a debt. Gods are going to war against Earth and each other, and you’ve chosen our side. On second thought, I think we should wait for Ares and Apollo to return and test it on them. While you four occupy them, I can try to drain them.”
“They’re more powerful than you think,” Demeter said. “And when they summon the other major gods, they’ll all be here in an instant. And you don’t want to face the three original gods yet, not before you’re ready.”
“Fine,” I said, wheeling to Phobos. “Now it’s your turn, sugar doll.”
Phobos wept.
I didn’t feel sorry or pity for him, unlike before. I remembered how he’d beaten me over and over while mocking me, peeled my flesh from my bones, and tore my gown off with the intent to rape me.
My dark fire grabbed him, and his energy flowed into me, filling my well of power and nourishing me.
I was high instantly.
If Phobos could be so delicious, his dad must be a real delicacy. I craved a major god’s pure power. My gaze swept to Demeter again, but I wouldn’t harm her.
My tri-fires—black, blue, and red—twirled around me, licking at my skin. The black fire came from the death god, the blue from Earth, and the red from the Dragon God.
Feeling glorious from feeding off a god, I threw my head back and roared.
The terror and fear essence from the gods had once again triggered something dark and ruthless inside me. Darkness swirled around me like black wind, swallowing all other colors. All beings were my prey, except my mates.
Phobos crumpled on the ground like an empty waterskin, and my eyes glowed with power. I’d drained him within an inch of his life.
“Cass baby, you should stop now,” Reys suggested gently.
“Dulcis!” Lorcan was more forceful with his warning.
All my mates looked alarmed. They remembered my withdrawal when I couldn’t get the energy drink from a god for a couple of weeks.
“I’ll be fine,” I said. “I’ve learned how to channel the gods’ essence. There!”
I spread my arms, my palms facing down, and violet light shot out of me, all the way down to Earth. “The energy I drank from them has repaired me. The rest of their energy can go to Earth and repair the damage to the land their kind caused. Earth and I have an understanding now. It’s my new reservoir.” I grinned at them. “If I need a real pure shot, I’ll take from you four.”
And my face flushed.
Lorcan swept me into his arms before the others could and kissed me.
“What are you exactly, Cassandra Saélihn?” Demeter whispered. “You’re more than a goddess.”
I winked at her. No gods could mutate powers like I did.
“We need to go, and take Phobos with us,” Alaric said roughly.
“Leave Phobos,” Demeter said. “Cass did a number on him. He won’t have a coherent thought for a long time, so he’s our perfect fall guy. You should all go now. Apollo and Ares are on their way back. I’ll stall them.”
Her gray eyes met mine. “I’ll see you again, Cass.”
12
Dazzling sunlight warmed my healed skin.
With my mates around me, the day was beautiful again, the nightmare seemingly left behind and forgotten. But if the gods found us and took me again, the nightmare would just be starting.
I pushed away that dreadful thought. I was with my smoldering-hot mates now. I wouldn’t let such dark things taint our every moment together.
My eyes roved over each of them in hungry appreciation. I’d soon relish them one by one, or perhaps all of them together.
“We need to find the slipstream, mates,” I said.
“Don’t you worry about a thing, Cass baby,” Pyrder said, holding my hand as Lorcan carried me.
The vibrant sun could no longer harm the High Lord of Night since my blood flowed in his veins. He looked young and gorgeous with sunlight painting his dark hair nearly golden and dancing on his lush eyelashes. He still managed his usual air of mystery. That was how he would always roll.
I pressed my palm on his strong chin, and his piercing gray eyes devoured me, tracing every line on my face.
“My dulcis, my fire and light and sun,” he said, his expression softening a notch, yet fury beat within him, akin to the frozen rage that I felt still trapped inside my other mates.
Reys and Pyrder, on either side of me, exuded equal masculine beauty. Their turquoise eyes didn’t leave me, as if they were afraid that if they blinked I’d disappear again. Reys’s turquoise eyes were a shade lighter like the purest ocean glowing in the sunlight. Pyrder’s, however, were the color of a storm-tossed sea in turmoil.
I could look at both of them forever. I could stare at all of my mates forever.
Alaric put two fingers into his mouth and whistled.
A horse’s neigh responded.
A golden stallion with massive wings materialized on the grass ahead of us, an open carriage the size of a house behind him.
My jaw dropped.
“I know,” Amber said behind me. “It’s the chariot of the gods. I’d read about the magical being only in history books, until now. We came with him as well, and the ride was the smoothest ever! I feel like I’m still dreaming. Do you want to punch me to feel better?”
“No, I don’t want to punch you,” I said. “I’d never punch a friend.” I turned to study the stallion in awe again. “He’s magnificent! Why did he even agree to carry you guys here and then carry us back?”
The stallion gave me a nonplused look. “I owed the demigod a debt from a long time ago, and he still remembered and called on it!”
What? The horse talked?
Amber’s eyes went as round as mine. “Blood sky!” she exclaimed.
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br /> “I’m Arion, and you’re the newest goddess,” the stallion said, looking me over. “After this, Alaric and I are even. It took a great deal of work to burden myself with this big carriage! Anyway, I’m among the few who can travel the slipstream.”
This Arion liked to brag and complain.
“You’re awesome, Arion,” Amber praised. She seemed to want to go pat him but was afraid of offending the magical beast.
Alaric leapt onto Arion’s shiny back, lithe and graceful beyond words, and my heart fluttered at sight of his harsh, masculine beauty and strength.
Pyrder got on the carriage and seated himself at the edge. Before Lorcan passed me onto Pyrder, I called, “Wait.”
I wheeled toward the direction of the Amethyst Palace and let my fires out.
I wanted to burn it down, but I didn’t have it in my heart to hurt the servants, including Aurora, even though the god had turned them mindless. Plus, he could easily duplicate whatever I destroyed, and I would just waste my breath and fires.
But still, I wanted to scorch his landscaped lawn, just to further piss him off.
When I was done, Lorcan swept me up effortlessly onto the carriage and placed me on his lap, refusing to let Pyrder take me over. Somehow, he’d gotten Alaric’s cloak and wrapped it around me, even though I told him that I wasn’t cold.
Reys helped Amber onto the carriage and sat across from me with her, but his attention remained on me the entire time. I beamed at him. I believed it a nice, bright smile because my lips were no longer split. My eyelids fluttered healthily, no longer swollen shut.
Reys smiled back, but there was also a well of sadness and rage simmering beneath the relief in his blue eyes. I would wipe away the lingering sorrow and guilt from all of my mates when we got home.
Alaric signaled Arion with pressure from his thighs, and the beast gave a loud sigh and took off. He ran straight in the center of the slipstream, which formed before us amid the clouds.
Amber stretched out her small hand to touch the cloud, and I leaned toward Pyrder, wanting to do the same. Lorcan pulled me back to his chest gently, and Pyrder helped him to settle me on the High Lord’s lap, looking alarmed. Reys also looked concerned as he scanned the clouds around us.
They were afraid that something might be lurking in the cloud. They were terrified of something snatching me away from them again.
Lorcan’s arms around my waist tightened, taking a shuddering breath and holding me as if I might be ripped away from him at any moment.
I wanted to protest that I wasn’t suddenly made of glass, but I understood where they came from, so I didn’t pout.
I gave Alaric and his broad shoulders an envious stare. I wanted to ride with him on Arion’s back, to feel the wild wind and crisp, icy current, but I knew my mates wouldn’t let me. I’d seen the looks in their eyes when they found me strung up by those chains, naked and bloodied.
Lorcan pressed my palm over his chest, and his powerful heart thumped against my skin. “It started beating again, dulcis,” he said. “When you were taken, it stopped, and I was more dead inside than ever. You make it beat; it’ll always beat for you.”
My free hand played with his hair. “You guys all need haircuts and a shave as well,” I said. It was probably my job to keep reminding them of that from now on. “It looks like none of you have slept or eaten. That’s unacceptable. Hygiene is a necessity.”
“We’re sorry,” Reys said. “Do we all smell?”
They still smelled good. Their immortal power probably had something to do with that.
“But you still need to shower,” I said, shaking my head.
“We will bath together when we get home,” Lorcan promised. “We’ll take care of you.”
Amber’s face turned as red as a tomato, and I gave her a puzzled look. My mates didn’t ask her to join our bath.
I smirked at my friend. “I’m mated to all of them, pip. So you need to get used to our adult talk, but don’t use too much imagination.”
Amber rolled her eyes, and then she started sobbing. “I told you to stay away from water with sound.”
“I thought you meant the shower,” I said.
“They tortured you. The brutal gods hurt you,” she cried. “It’s my fault. I should have figured out that it was a waterfall and told your mates not to let you near it.”
She’d seen me beaten to nothing more than a meat pulp, and the horrific, violent sight had rocked her world. But war was brutal, and she’d be with me in the center of the coming conflict. I hoped I could spare my mortal friend, but war had come for all of us.
I’d still try my best to shield her.
“Look, pip, I’m fine,” I said. “I’m here with my mates and you now, and I’m healing. I’m no fucking victim. I broke free and my mates came for me, and we’ll strike back harder than the gods’ collective asses can take. I’m not a victim, but a defender. For what I suffered, for the nightmares I lived through, I’ll make sure others don’t experience the same. My vows stand. I’ll defend those who can’t defend themselves, with my mates at my side. And in order to do that, I need all of you to help me dig out the deeper, latent goddess’s power within me.”
It was the first time I’d acknowledged myself as a goddess.
Amber nodded, blinking back tears, and her hand squeezing mine carefully. “That’s why I was sent to serve you. My life is yours to command.”
I squeezed her hand back while giving my mates a pointed look. “No one should blame themselves for my being taken and beaten. It was meant to happen. If not, I wouldn’t have gotten this.”
I extracted the white eagle feather from under my curly hair.
Reys took the feather from my hand and read the glowing inscription on it: Down the rabbit hole.
He raised an eyebrow, and Amber peeked at the writing.
“Where we can find the tool to kill the major gods,” I whispered. “Let’s talk more when we get home.”
A slice of hope rose in Reys’s eyes. Lorcan clutched me tighter.
We finally had a breakthrough.
My mates would do anything to protect me, and they knew only when we either drove away the gods or destroyed them, would I be safe, would any of us be safe, and would the mortals and immortals have a chance at a free life again.
Pyrder leaned in toward me, nuzzling his nose against my neck, inhaling deep.
His scent of rich spices and forest sun and rain wrapped around me, pumping longing into my soul. Then Lorcan’s scent of ancient wine and pine invaded my senses as well. I drew all of my mates’ scents into my lungs, wanting more.
Reys watched us, his eyes bright with longing and dark with desire. I knew he wanted to join us. His hungry look told me that he wanted more than anything to tear me away from Lorcan and press me against him, but he restrained himself. He was more concerned with my safety just now, as we were still in the sun god’s realm.
“Cass,” Pyrder whispered my name against the hollow of my neck.
I half shut my eyes at the sensation while Pyrder and Lorcan touched me tenderly. They were still convincing themselves that they’d gotten me back.
Then our mating bond swirled to life, as if intense sunlight suddenly flooded in, shining on every corner. It was a beautiful and intoxicating feeling, but I rushed to raise a shield against the light, to filter it so it couldn’t expose the deep shadow and darkness in me.
My mates had gone through enough pain when they had seen me taken away. Their agony was still palpable, despite how they tried to conceal it.
I wouldn’t let them see my internal wound. My pain might just tear theirs open again and break them. The truth was, though I was free from the imprisonment, chains, and torture, though I seemed to have healed while I drank from the two gods, the unspoken pain buried deep in my tissue hadn’t left me.
The pain and horror had become an embedded memory in my bones. I had no idea if all the invisible scars would ever leave me, but what I could do was to hide this burden
from my mates so it wouldn’t hurt them, too.
I wouldn’t drag them down.
“Give, Lorcan,” Pyrder said. “It’s my turn to hold our mate.”
“I haven’t warmed her yet,” Lorcan said.
“She isn’t only yours,” Pyrder said, his voice gaining edge. “I need to hold Cass!”
“You can hold her hand,” Lorcan said.
Pyrder growled. “I thought we had an understanding.”
“Hey,” I called. I didn’t want them to fight over me when they’d just gotten me back.
“Fine, we take turns.” Lorcan conceded with reluctance and passed me to Pyrder. “And then she shall return to my side.”
Pyrder pressed me against himself as if he could never bear to lose me again. I planted a kiss on his eyelid, and his smile grew warmer than the summer sun. I couldn’t kiss him on the lips right now because once I did, I wouldn’t stop. He wouldn’t stop, either, and we were still in the open and vulnerable.
“The first thing you all need to do when we get back is to eat and then take a nap while I bathe,” I said.
“Not a chance,” Pyrder said. “We have forever to eat and sleep. I’ll help bathe you. It’s my favorite thing in the world.”
This time my face flushed, and I didn’t even need to peek at Amber.
“My turn,” Reys said, quiet but demanding, across from us.
Only Alaric remained aloof. He rode the winged horse, the wild wind dancing in his hair, his back stiff. Usually when I was on an outing, he was always the one to pick me up and carry me home.
He hadn’t said much to me since they found me, except when, in misunderstanding, he had accused me of showing sympathy toward the two gods who had tortured me. He hadn’t comforted me like the others. My demigod was shut down, the agony, guilt, and shame close to breaking him, and he carried so much rage in him.
I wouldn’t allow him to break. I wouldn’t let him shut me out. I would get through to him and knock down his walls when we were under a safe roof.