by Rina Kent
I moved my tongue around as he pulled himself out of my mouth then reentered. His vein throbbed underneath my tongue and I pushed down harder on that spot, flinching when he yanked my head closer, pushing deeper until he hit the back of my throat.
I coughed around him, and he eased up, pulling himself out of me and wiping the tears that had spilled due to the coughing fit.
“You okay?”
I peered up at him and nodded.
“Keep looking at me.” He urged my chin up so that I looked at him and pushed his cock back into my mouth.
I kept my eyes on him like he asked, and he picked up his pace. He shoved in and out of me, alternating between jerking me by my hair and thrusting himself into me.
It shouldn’t have been hot, but it was. The look in his eyes. The lust on his face. Knowing he didn’t show this part of himself to others… most others. My clit throbbed and I writhed beneath him again, but for a whole new reason. I tried to move my hand to my clit, but his free hand gripped my wrist as soon as I’d managed to get one arm free.
“No,” he said, so much lust dripping in that one syllable. “Your attention stays on me.”
When my arm went slack he released it, and I laid it back down at my side. My lids grew heavy, but every time I went to close my eyes, his grip in my hair tightened and he shook me. There was so much to feel. He filled my mouth, consuming my senses. To look at him while he did it was almost too much, but I forced my eyes to stay on him anyway.
My thighs clenched and I rubbed my legs together to get some amount of friction to my clit. Soft whines crept up my throat, and Camden broke eye contact. His mouth opened and he lifted his head. “Keep doing that,” he demanded, pumping into me at a faster pace.
I whined more, allowing my eyes to close as I focused on feeling. Smelling. Tasting. Each time he pulled back, a salty taste centered on my tongue. I moaned and licked at his slit, making him pause there and pull my hair to the point of pain. “Jesus fucking Christ.”
He pulled out of my mouth, and before I could open my eyes, his weight lifted from me. My eyes shot open, and I rose onto my elbows, my brows pinching in confusion. He’d moved to my shins. Sweat coated his forehead, and he swiped the back of his hand over it.
“Is something wrong?”
His eyes darted to me and he laughed before reaching to the button on my jeans. “No, I just don’t want to come yet.” He popped the button and yanked them down my hips in one forceful jerk. “It’s your turn.”
He slid my pants the rest of the way off and tossed them to the floor. My legs pressed together, and he pulled them apart, my knees in his hands. His eyes were so dark, so crazed.
“Go slow,” I whispered, grasping his hand that had made its way to my panties.
He flicked his gaze to me and nodded.
I rested my hand on the sheets and leaned my head back before closing my eyes. My muscles were rigid, the cool air in the room suddenly more noticeable. It bit down into my nipples, leaving a sting. The ripping of fabric filled the room, and that same cool air coated my opening, cooling my arousal to make it even more recognizable.
My eyes shot open and I tried to pull my legs together, but Camden’s hands were there to keep them pried apart. Most of my skin was now cold, but my cheeks were on fire.
“Camden.”
“Just relax,” he said, not even looking up at me. His eyes were on my most private area. His fingers dug into my thighs until I was sure they’d leave bruises. “It’ll feel good. I promise.” He shifted so that he was laying down on his stomach, his mouth inches from my throbbing clit. His breaths skated over me, into me. Electricity wracked my body, leaving me squirming.
“You still want this, right?” he asked, glancing up at me.
I swallowed and laid my head back on the pillow. “Yeah, I think so.”
More breath ignited my nerves as he chuckled.
I was a moment away from telling him I changed my mind. A moment from letting the shame flood me, my mother’s voice entering my mind, Sebastian’s disapproval. One moment away from it, when something wet and thick collided with my most sensitive area. He started at the clit, as if he could see it pulsating. His tongue ran over it before dipping lower and running the length of my folds, one side, then the other. He was a dog lapping at the last bits of food in its bowl.
“C-Camden.” My mouth opened in an O, and I fisted the sheets. My back arched and chest heaved to meet his movements. He found his way to my clit again and flicked his tongue over it.
Fuck.
Fuck.
Fuck.
I gasped as he inserted a finger into me, my walls spasming around him. He pumped in and out of me while sucking on my clit. I was faintly aware of my legs trembling, as if his mouth was shattering the rest of my body, sending a shockwave that made it quake.
A minute passed before I realized I’d stopped breathing, and I sawed air in and out of my lungs.
Tension wound tighter, and my hips lifted off the bed, pressing myself into Camden. Harder. Closer. I was at the edge, ready to fly, when he yanked me back and I crashed to the ground.
I opened my eyes and lifted up to see him ripping open a foil packet. He quickly rolled on a condom and scooted up my body. I grunted involuntarily, my face immediately flushing when he laughed. “Soon, babe. I promise.”
He positioned himself at my entrance and bent to kiss me. I tasted myself on his lips and tried to turn my head, but he held me in place.
He prodded against my opening, easy at first, before spearing me with one sharp thrust. Pain ripped up my spine and exploded behind my eyelids. I sucked the air from Camden’s mouth in a gasp and pressed my hands to his chest to shove him off me.
He gripped my hands and pressed them to the bed. His tongue massaged my mouth, but I was no longer a participator in the kiss. I was no longer giving it to him. He was taking it.
He rested inside of me while my walls squeezed violently around him. He was too big. It was too much. He was ripping me apart.
He broke the kiss and wiped the tears that had leaked from my eyes, letting one of my wrists go in the process. “It’ll only hurt for a minute.”
I opened my eyes and narrowed them only a moment before lifting my free hand and connecting it with his cheek. It wasn’t hard enough to leave more than a faint red print, but it was enough to surprise him.
His head whipped to the side, and he swung it back to me with a glare. “What the fuck?”
“I told you to go slow, do you call that slow? Get off of me.”
I yanked my other hand from his grasp and pushed against his chest again, more forceful this time.
“Eden, stop.”
I kept pressing against his chest until he grabbed my arms again and pinned them above my head.
“I said get off of me!”
“Okay!”
The sharp tone of his voice caught me off guard, and I stilled beneath him. His eyes were narrowed, his jawline hard. He was no longer inside me, and my pussy clenched in disapproval. It still wanted this. Only my mind didn’t.
“I’ll get off of you, I’ll take you home and we can pretend none of this happened. Is that what you want?”
Another tear spilled from my eye, but it no longer had to do with pain. There was a dull ache, but now I just felt stupid. My first time was ruined, or according to Camden, it’d never happened.
“No.”
“Then tell me what you want,” he said, releasing my wrists and moving his hands to cradle my face. “Honestly, Eden. I’m having a hard time figuring it out. You liked when I was rough with you before, but you switch off like a light switch. I don’t know what you want me to do.”
“I don’t know either,” I whispered, turning my head to face the window. There was a large tree outside, and I focused on its branches swaying instead of the tension in the room. Had he ruined it, or had I?
He had a point. One minute, all my inhibitions were gone and the next it felt like I was suffocating… e
ven without anything lodged in my mouth.
He started to climb off me, and I grasped his shoulders to stop him. “Wait.”
“For what, Eden? What are we doing here?” He shook his head and rolled off me, planting his feel on the floor. “This isn’t worth it.”
“It’s not worth me?” I scoffed, hoping to successfully hide how much that question drove a knife into my heart.
“That’s not what I meant.”
His back was to me, so I couldn’t read his expression. He sounded cold, like he was closing himself off from me, and I was so confused as to whether I should blame him for it or not.
But I knew what I wanted, and it wasn’t to be angry.
“I don’t want to go home… I’m sorry I slapped you. Can we just. Can we pretend that didn’t happen?”
“I can’t control if it hurts, Eden. That’s just a part of it. It wasn’t intentional.”
“I know,” I said, taking a deep breath so this next part didn’t sound angry. “But you can go slower… right?”
His back lifted in a sigh, and he raked his fingers through his hair. He turned and shifted closer to me, running his palm over my leg. “I’m sorry.”
“Me too.” The corners of my lips perked up, and I placed my hand over his. I pulled him to me so that he situated himself on top of me, the tip of his cock hovering at my entrance.
“So we can pretend that didn’t happen?” I bit my lip as I waited for his response.
His own smile pulled at the corners of his mouth, and he leaned down to kiss me. Sweet. Gentle. Completely opposite to what he’d given me in the past. It was different, but still good, and exactly what I needed in that moment. My chest warmed and that warmth spread to my belly, settling in my core that was already igniting from the feel of Camden so close.
He pushed in, this time slowly. My walls clamped around him, but the pain was more of a bite than an explosion. My face scrunched, and Camden pulled back to look at me, his body stilling. “Keep going?”
“Yeah,” I said, forcing my face to relax. “It’s just a lot.”
“Heard that before.”
Laughter bubbled out of my mouth, but I slapped him on the arm and shook my head. “Don’t say shit like that.”
He smiled and pushed in deeper, leaning in to whisper into my now open mouth. “I’m just playing. You’re the only girl I want… And the only virgin I’ve slept with.”
He paused when he made it all the way in, and then eased out.
“I’m not surprised.” I tilted my head back as a rush of air blew over my lips.
“Oh?”
“Yeah,” I said, fighting the grin pulling my lips. “You’re much more into the… experienced type.”
He laughed and pushed into me again, wiping the smile from my face and replacing it with pursed lips. “You mean old?”
“Tomayto, tomahto” I barely managed the words on a whisper, and I arched my back to meet another thrust. His hip grinded on my clit, and I shifted to add to the friction.
“You’re my type,” he said, giving my hips a more forceful jerk.
My hands lifted to his back, and I dug my nails into skin. “Okay, more,” I panted, meeting another thrust.
He picked up the pace, driving into me with more force each time I shuddered. The pain was a distant memory, forced into the back of my brain by the overwhelming sensations wracking through me in waves. It covered me like a heavy blanket, suffocating me in the best way possible.
Fuck.
Fuck.
Fuck.
“Is this good?” he asked, out of breath and with an amused tone. I laughed and combed my hand through his hair, gripping and pulling him to my mouth.
I tried to mimic the way he kissed me, with brutal passion. He didn’t need my words. Not now. Now he just needed to keep going.
Our tongues swirled, and I moaned into his mouth when he gave an especially vicious thrust.
It was every time now. Every jerk of his hips was almost meant to punish me, but I found myself rewarding him for it with more moans and more tugs on his hair. I was high on power, somehow sure that I was the one controlling the rhythm, even though they were his movements.
He picked up my hips and plowed into me deeper, reaching the point that pain bit each time he shoved all the way in. It mixed with the pleasure, and this time, I welcomed it.
He twisted me tighter and tighter and tighter, until finally, I snapped.
A white light burst behind my eyes, and my mouth opened, letting out a cry that pierced through the cloud of tension in the room. It fell like rain droplets around us.
Camden stilled and collapsed on top of me, and my eyes opened as my muscles relaxed their squeezing. He was still inside me, his once raging hard-on now softening.
“Camden,” I panted, running my fingers through his sweat caked hair.
He rolled off of me and pulled me to his moistened chest. It pressed into my breasts each time his chest expanded.
“What, babe?” he asked, already closing his eyes.
“That was perfect.”
His dimples stood out as he smiled, and he smoothed the hair back from my face.
“Yeah?”
I snuggled into him and closed my eyes. A slimy mess coated my inner thighs, but I was too exhausted to care. My muscles were spent, and my mind was dizzy with whatever chemical this was.
I was seconds away from passing out. I yawned and smiled as Camden’s hand rested on my hip.
“Yeah.”
Chapter Twenty-One
Eden
“Why do we need to eat out here again?”
I nibbled on the salt covering a pretzel as I stared at Camden leaning over the railing of the football stadium stands. He turned back to me and threw his legs on either side of the bleachers below me. He rested his hands behind him and leaned back. “We don’t need to. It’s just nicer out here.”
I turned my gaze up toward the cloudy sky and frowned. “Yeah, such a beautiful day.”
“Do you really want to listen to Hunter and Trey talk about Sooner Saturday? Because I, for one, am tired of it.”
“You’re not excited about Saturday?” I bit into my pretzel and tilted my head while I chewed.
Camden shrugged. “I don’t know, I guess. We’ve already seen the college, though. Not sure what the point is of seeing it again.”
I finished chewing and swallowed before setting the pretzel down and considering the best way to relay what was on my mind. Last time I’d brought up football possibly not being the right path for him, he’d freaked out. I didn’t want a repeat of that, but I also couldn’t say nothing. If he didn’t want it, then what was he even doing it for?
“So what are you going to major in?” I took a swig of Gatorade and wiped my mouth before setting the bottle back on the bench.
“Computer Science.”
“That’s fitting.” I tapped the bottom of the bleachers with my feet and smiled. “Is OU known for their Computer Science program?”
He shrugged. “Hey, so what time do you leave for your Berklee interview again?”
Nice change in subject.
“My plane leaves at noon on Saturday.”
“So you probably aren’t going to make it to the game tomorrow night, huh? Gotta get your beauty sleep and all that.” He winked and grabbed the Gatorade bottle, taking a drink.
“Oh, no, I’ll be there.” I shifted on the bench and picked up another pretzel. “I wouldn’t miss it.”
Camden didn’t say anything, and when I glanced at him, his eyes were pointed up toward the sky. His face was expressionless.
“Do you not want me there?”
Rolling his neck toward me, he plastered on a smile. He sat up straighter and put his hand on my knee, tracing imaginary patterns into the denim. “Of course I do.”
His eyes moved to my knee, and his cheek caved in as he bit it.
The past few days had been incredible. Better than incredible, really. We’d spent every nigh
t talking on the phone until one in the morning, and he’d been waiting for me at my car every day when orchestra let out. He’d walked me to first period every morning, knowing that Sebastian wouldn’t. Sebastian and I were done being friends by the looks of it. He’d ignored all my texts and switched desks in all of our shared classes so that we were no longer sitting together. Tuesday, I’d been relieved when Camden asked if I wanted to eat outside instead of the cafeteria, but now it was Thursday, and it was starting to get suspicious.
He still hadn’t asked me to the homecoming dance. My dress was all picked out, but I was still waiting. Until now, I’d thought maybe it was an understood thing. I mean, his friends knew about him and me. Hunter had been especially nice to me and talked to me as if I belonged. Come to think of it, Hunter was the only friend that acknowledged me at all.
I should just ask Camden about it. I spent all my time being too chickenshit to ask the questions that sat so heavily on my mind, and I needed to stop. He was my boyfriend… sort of. It was weird for me not to know his friends. Right?
I opened my mouth with every intention of spilling my guts, but Camden cut me off before any words came out.
“Do you think I shouldn’t go to OU?”
I blinked a few times and closed my mouth. Several seconds passed before I responded. “Do you want to go to OU?”
He sighed and leaned back again, peering up at the sky. “I don’t know.”
“Have you applied anywhere else?”
I chose my words carefully, knowing this was a touchy subject. But he’d been the one to bring it up this time. How long had he been thinking about this?
“About a month ago, I sent in an application to MIT.” He laughed, and not in a humorous way, and shook his head. “Not that I was serious or anything, but other than there, no, I haven’t applied anywhere else.”
I nodded and blew up my cheeks before silently letting them deflate. “Why weren’t you serious about it?”
“Because I’m a quarterback, Eden. No one would take me seriously.”
“I do.”
He peered over at me, his eyes narrowed.