by Trina M. Lee
Rowen kissed my lips, my cheek, my neck. With slow, even strides he took me to greater heights than I’d ever known before him. Every time we touched, every intimate moment we shared, it did something to me. Something deep and profound, changing me, making me better. Rowen’s light was so much more than an ability. It left a lasting impact on everyone it touched. I felt grateful to be one of them.
“I love you, Spike,” he whispered against my ear. “No matter what happens, remember that.”
I ran a hand up his back, dragging my nails along his spine. “Rowen, you brought me back to life. You showed me that love does exist for me in this fucked up world. I will love you forever.”
So much for not saying it.
Rowen gazed down at me, brow furrowed as if some internal struggle went on inside him too. A groan escaped him. Before I could question it, he grabbed my hips and rolled us over so I was on top.
A flash of light momentarily blinded me as Rowen’s wings unfurled beneath him. They spread out across the bed, two beautiful silver wings so big they almost hung off each side. As I readjusted myself atop him, I reached to glide my hands over the silken feathers. So soft and yet so strong. Glorious.
I set the pace, drawing him inside me. Watching Rowen close his eyes and throw his head back in ecstasy filled me with joy. Being able to take him to that magical place beyond this world was exhilarating.
As each moment passed we fell deeper down the rabbit hole of pleasure. The worries that lived in me went silent, numbed out by the overwhelming sensations as our bodies united as one, moving in tandem.
I couldn’t control the force of our lovemaking. It took over, driving me to the brink of climax though I struggled to hold back, to make it last longer. Once he pushed me past the point of no return, I fought not to come undone.
I leaned down over him, needing to feel more of his body against mine. His skin was hot, a light sheen of sweat covered it. With one hand I clutched a few feathers, marveling at how impossibly soft they were.
Rowen murmured my name. I made a sound that was almost a whimper as it all became too much, too intense, and I crashed over the edge like a wave smashing down on the beach. His body tensed beneath me, and he threw his arms around me, holding tight.
Chest heaving, I rolled off onto the expanse of feathers spread across the bed. Rowen flung a hand out, needing to keep touching. I caught it, slipping my fingers between his. We lay there in silence, enjoying the moment while catching our breath.
After several minutes of afterglow bliss, Rowen turned his head toward me and grinned. “Ready to go again?”
I slapped him playfully and laughed. “You must be in better shape than I am. I think I need some water first.”
“I’ll get it. Want anything else from the kitchen?” Rowen disentangled himself and bounded for the door, bare-ass naked.
“No, thank you. Don’t tell me you guys walk around like that in front of each other,” I said, pulling the edge of the sheet over my nudity. Just in case.
Rowen paused near the door and stretched. His wings disappeared but I could still see them when I tried. “You don’t want to know. Let’s just say that Arrow has no shame, which I’m sure you’ve noticed.”
“And how,” I muttered. I had woken up in Arrow’s bed next to his naked self not so long ago.
“He’s out cold anyway. I’ll be right back.” Rowen darted out the door before I could protest, leaving me to giggle at the sight of his clenched butt cheeks on his way out.
While he was gone I propped myself up in a sitting position against the headboard. I stared at the Midnight Star where it leaned against the wall beside my guitar case. It was the reminder I needed. Bad things were coming down the wire. I could feel it. But could I stand up in the face of it? I had to.
Pondering what the future held right after a steamy session with Rowen probably wasn’t the best idea. I didn’t want to let anything ruin the afterglow I was rocking. Still, I couldn’t shake the sneaking suspicion that things were going to get worse before they got better.
“Here ya go, babe.” Rowen’s reappearance startled me out of my thoughts. He kicked the door shut and pressed a glass of cold water into my hand. Then he stared at me until I’d taken a drink and set it on the night table. “This is for you too.”
I was surprised when he held out a small black velvet bag. “What’s this?”
He slid onto the bed next to me, but he wouldn’t meet my eyes. “Open it.”
Adrenaline hit my system. After the night we’d had, I was amazed my body had any left to spare. With shaky fingers I fumbled with the drawstring holding the bag closed. A ring fell into my palm. The band was white gold with two angel wings that met at the top, lying diagonally beside one another. It was beautiful. I had no words for what I felt staring at the ring in my hand. It took several attempts before my voice would work.
“It’s beautiful, Rowen. But what is it? I mean… Sorry, I don’t know what I mean.” A blush warmed my cheeks.
“It’s a promise.” He stared at the ring as if that were easier than looking at me. He took a long, slow breath with a shudder. “It was my mom’s. Even though I’m adopted, I think she knew more than she ever let on. She sent it to me a few years ago and told me to give it to someone I couldn’t imagine my life without. And that’s you. I wanted you to have it… before everything goes to shit.”
Realization settled in as both my dreams and nightmares came true at once. “You’re going to do something crazy, aren’t you?”
Still he wouldn’t look at me when he said, “I might have to.”
I swallowed hard, nodding as tears welled up in my eyes. “You know I won’t let you give yourself up for me.”
Now he dragged his gaze to mine, as if it took great effort to do so. The pain he didn’t want me to see was heavy in his amber eyes. “I know.”
One single tear escaped me, and I wiped it away before it could get far. “So what are you promising?”
This was not how I wanted to end a night of mayhem and love. But it was fitting I supposed. Maybe I was a fool to think we could have it all. We were born into a battle. Perhaps there was no room for love in war.
“I promise to love you no matter what happens. And when things seem the most bleak, that’s when my love will be the strongest.” Taking the ring from my hand, Rowen slipped it onto my finger. “Let this be a symbol of what you mean to me. Which, in case you can’t tell, is everything.”
The moment that ring slid onto my finger I knew that, whatever Rowen planned to do, it was going to destroy everything we’d created together. All I could do was give a solemn nod.
“I promise that I won’t give up on you, Rowen,” I said, each word more painful than the last. “No matter what stupid ass thing you’re going to do.”
A smile lit up his face, but it didn’t ignite the fire in his gaze. “That’s all I want to hear.”
Rowen leaned in to kiss me. Hooking an arm around me, he lay me down beneath him and proceeded to love me again. His breath on my neck, his whispers and moans in my ear, the way every nerve came alive under his caress: these things I cherished, storing them away for when I needed them most.
It was almost morning when we lay spent in each other’s arms. Rowen curled up behind me, holding me against his chest. I often wondered if he was still there with me once he fell asleep. As a dreamwalker Rowen was able to enter the dreams of others. It was his newest ability. Though he said he had full control of it, I couldn’t help but be curious.
Sleep came against my will. I fought it as long as I could, wanting so desperately to stay awake, to be ready for anything.
When I woke up several hours later naked and alone, I felt disappointed, then alarmed. A quick glance around the bedroom confirmed that Rowen’s clothing was gone. With a brief, wistful glance at the ring on my finger, I rolled out of bed and yanked on some PJ pants and a t-shirt.
Arrow lay still asleep on the couch. One arm and leg hung haphazardly off the side,
and he snored into the pillow we’d crammed beneath his head. It took several nudges and pokes to rouse him.
He blinked up at me, confused at first and then annoyed. “What the hell am I doing here?”
“Get up,” I said, ignoring his question. “Rowen’s gone. And I’m pretty sure he went straight to Dash.”
CHAPTER TWENTY
“Shit!” I hit the end call button on my phone with an angry jab of my thumb. “His phone is going straight to voicemail.”
“Of course it is.” Arrow sounded bored. “He’s not an idiot.”
Rowen had definitely thought this through. He’d taken the keys to both our vehicles, leaving us stranded. I called Tash next, hoping she’d be good for a ride. Jett’s car was drivable but in need of work, and Rubi was likely studying or sleeping. When Tash didn’t answer, my irritation turned into sheer frustration.
“It would be nice if you could act like you give a shit,” I snapped. “You’re part of the reason he’s doing this. Whatever exactly he’s doing.”
Arrow regarded me with a raised brow and an eye roll. A mug of coffee clutched in hand, he watched me rush frantically around the kitchen. “Sure. But you’re the straw that broke the camel’s back.”
That stopped me in my tracks. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means that it may have started with Rowen wanting to protect me, but it was you that drove him over the edge. Once Dash made you a target, it was just a matter of time.” He gestured with his cup toward the bathroom. “Can I grab a shower before you drag me to Dash’s?”
I gaped at him in disbelief. “We do not have time for that. Is your cleanliness really a priority over your brother’s soul?”
Arrow sighed, a heavily dramatized sound for my benefit. “Of course not. But whether you want to agree with me or not, Rowen knows what he’s doing. He’s not the type to make impulsive decisions. Do you at least have a clean shirt I can borrow?”
His confidence in Rowen was admirable, and though Rowen had the freedom to make his own decisions, I had a calling that stated I couldn’t just sit back and do nothing while he handed himself over to the dark.
“Get us a ride to Dash’s house, and I’ll see what I can dig up,” I muttered, stalking into my bedroom with clenched fists. “By the way, I think you owe both Rowen and me for that shit you pulled last night. You’ve clearly lost your damn mind. I’m not sure I can even trust you.”
I hurriedly changed into jeans and a tank top. Because I wasn’t taking any chances, I slung the Midnight Star onto my back in its sheath and grabbed the smaller silver dagger that fit into my boot. I was prepared to use either on anyone who gave me a reason to. Arrow included.
“That wasn’t me, Spike,” Arrow called after me. “Come on, you know that. I’ve had demons fucking around inside my head. I can’t be blamed for that.”
I made a grimace he couldn’t see. Perhaps I couldn’t know what he’d suffered because of Dash. However, after having him threaten my life, twice, I was opting for caution.
After digging through a stack of t-shirts in the back of my closet, I found a Crimson Sin shirt that should fit. With a silent snicker to myself, I decided it would do.
“Why the hell would Dash ever make you try to kill Rowen?” I asked when I rejoined him in the kitchen. “That makes no sense. He wants Rowen alive.”
“Yeah, Dash does. But who’s to say that someone else doesn’t have plans of their own?” He caught the shirt I tossed and scowled at the logo. “Seriously?”
“Take it or leave it.” I shrugged. “I suspect Koda wants to get rid of Rowen. He was there last night. But wouldn’t he want to reunite the triad as well?”
Arrow stripped off the shirt he wore and tossed it over the back of the easy chair in the living room. His pants were slung low, giving me a glimpse of the four leaf clover boxers he wore underneath. “Who knows? Only Koda can answer that question. All I know is I’d never try to kill Rowen without some kind of demon influence.”
“But I’m fair game? Thanks, dude.” My gaze was drawn to the raven on his hip. It was a finely done piece. When he caught me looking, I turned away, embarrassed. “Did you get us a ride yet?”
A sneer crossed his face, and I anticipated a snarky remark. Instead he checked his phone and nodded. “Sam said he’ll be here in fifteen. And for the record, I’ve never wanted to kill you.”
I waited for more, an insult tacked on to the end of that statement. It never came. “Fine,” I said, grabbing my jacket. “Let’s go wait downstairs for him.”
Every moment that passed while waiting for Sam throbbed in agony. I stood in the lobby where it was warm while Arrow smoked outside. I wasn’t sure what we’d be walking into, and though I’d hoped Cinder would’ve dropped in by now, his absence was a reminder that I couldn’t rely on him for everything. It wasn’t unusual for a few days to pass without any sign of him. Angels were busy.
It took seventeen minutes for Sam to arrive. During that time I considered the many awful things that Rowen could be facing while we were stuck here. I followed Arrow to the older Jeep Grand Cherokee in front of the building, surprised when he got in the back and left the front to me.
“Hey, guys,” Sam greeted us. “Everything ok?”
Arrow lit another cigarette and sucked in a lungful before saying, “It’s kind of one of those don’t ask don’t tell deals, Sammy.”
Not content to take such a shady response, Sam caught Arrow’s eye in the rearview mirror. “Does this have anything to do with the shit that went down at The Spirit Room last night?”
“It might. Sorry if I scared you, bud. Haven’t quite been myself lately.” Arrow slumped in his seat and puffed on his smoke, refusing to elaborate further.
Sam glanced at me and I shrugged. Seeing that he wouldn’t get anything out of either of us, he put the Jeep in gear and drove.
With every block that took us closer to the house Dash had overtaken as his own, my heart raced faster. By the time we turned into his neighborhood, my palms were sweaty, and it took great effort to breathe evenly.
“Just let us out here,” Arrow instructed. “Thanks, bro.”
“Thank you, Sam,” I added. “I appreciate this.”
He pulled the Jeep over and stopped, forcing a smile that did nothing to hide his evident worry. “No problem. Feel free to tell Jett how nice a guy I am. And be careful.”
With every step toward the demon’s house, my body tightened until I was so stiff I thought I might just shatter into thousands of pieces. When we rounded the bend and found Rowen’s black Charger on the street outside, I faltered.
“Let me handle this,” Arrow said. He grabbed my arm and dragged me back into motion. “If you go in there like a raging, pissed-off girlfriend, you’ll get us both killed. Or worse.”
I shot him a glower that was wasted on someone so disenchanted. “I’m not going in there like a pissed-off girlfriend. I’m going in there as a white lighter who’s sick of Dash’s manipulative shit.”
Arrow jerked me around to face him. The demon’s house loomed silently over us, a vengeful structure even in the late afternoon light. The sun set earlier in the winter. In less than an hour, Dash would be able to take physical form. However, I still expected him to be there. He could easily manifest by possessing one of his witches, who undoubtedly were inside.
“I can guarantee you that Dash is expecting you to come in there all worked up and emotionally charged. That shit will end you. So take a deep breath, calm the fuck down, and don’t let emotion cloud your logic.”
He marched up to the heavy iron gate and hit a button on the intercom. It crackled a few times before a female voice said, “Yes?”
“Open the fucking gate, Skylar,” Arrow snapped. “I’ll get in anyway, so you might as well let me in.”
There was a moment of silence. With a squeal of metal, the gate swung open, and we stepped onto the property. I froze, expecting the hellhounds that had accosted us the last time we came here for Ro
wen. I had a bad feeling this visit wouldn’t end the same way.
“They’re not out right now,” Arrow said, striding up the front step. “Which means they’re expecting us.” He banged on the door before trying the handle. It was locked.
The door swung open, and Skylar stood in the threshold with a scowl. “I was wondering when you’d show up.” Her ice-blue gaze pierced me. In one blink her eyes were red. Dash’s eyes. It was his voice that came out of her. “Spike, you shouldn’t have bothered.”
“I’ll make that decision for myself.” I drew myself up to my full height, refusing to cower before Dash.
Skylar turned away, her black ponytail swinging. Her gait was smooth but heavy. Dash didn’t have a dainty bone in his body, and it showed when he possessed a woman.
Arrow closed the door and fell into step behind the demon. I followed them both, fighting for calm breaths as I feared what we would find. Where was Rowen?
“We were just having a little chat,” Dash said, rounding the corner to the library. “I suppose you can join us, although I’m sure you’ll wish you hadn’t.”
The library was outstanding, like something right out of a movie. Floor to ceiling, books lined the walls. A quick glance revealed that most of them weren’t in English and most likely were not written by humans. A large throne-like chair sat in front of a blazing hearth. It sat at the head of a semicircle made up of a large table and several smaller chairs. Rowen sat in one of them.
Dash, in Skylar’s body, sauntered up to the throne-like chair and sat down, gesturing for us to take a seat. Arrow took a spot beside his brother. I sat as far from Dash as I could get, which meant sitting next to nobody; I was too emotional to get too close.
“You’re both right in time,” Dash said, his voice so wrong in Skylar’s grinning face. “We were just making a deal.”
“Like hell you are.” Arrow twisted in his chair to stab Rowen with a sharp glare. “What in the fuck are you doing here, bro?”
Rowen leaned forward, propped his elbows on the table, and put a hand to his head. Brow furrowed and chest heaving, he was obviously distressed. Even though Arrow had demanded an answer, Rowen looked at me when he replied, “I’m doing what I have to do. I can’t sit back and do nothing while the two of you face constant danger. Please, try to understand.”