It’s something, at least.
Chapter Five
Jara stares at us, her eyes startled whenever Eldan examines her for too long.
“Can you lead me to the place?”
Jara swallows, and nods. Then she gives me a beseeching look. “Can you perhaps… come?”
“Why?” Eldan crouches beside us, since we’re sitting on the floor, having just gotten out of an extended bout of hugging. I don’t remember seeing Jara there, in that place, but I know in her expression she’s seen the things I’ve seen.
“I don’t… I don’t want to see it alone.”
“Sky and earth,” Eldan says. “You people are so melodramatic. It can’t be that terrible, can it?”
Both of us shoot him offended looks.
“I’d like to come if you need it, but there’s the slight problem that people will execute me on sight. I’m too recognizable.”
“That can be solved,” Jara says to me. “Hair dye. A haircut. Little bit of makeup. I don’t think people will look at you twice. They think you're dead, after all. Right?”
Hope explodes in my chest. The thought of getting out the suite infects me, and I struggle to contain my excitement as I say, “I suppose that can work. It’s entirely up to Eldan, though. He likely doesn’t want me to leave.”
I see his eyes drop to my long red hair. “Fine,” he says. “Do what you must. It’s about time my slave got some fresh air.”
I suppress the squeal. The excitement takes me by surprise, because I haven’t dared to hope for so long. I like the new found confidence in Jara’s demeanour as well, though I partly suspect it’s because Eldan has seen the connection we’re making, and is aware I might not take to him kindly if he hurts this woman. She’s already been through enough.
Jara leaves, returning with hair dye, scissors and a bag of makeup. She washes my hair then cuts it to above my shoulders, giving me uneven, short hair. Then, using the dye, she turns it black, which also makes my eyes appear darker. I witness the transformation in the mirror, from a pale faced, red haired woman with a smattering of freckles upon her face to a dark haired, shadowy eyed woman with imperious makeup. I look like a fortune teller, or some kind of rogue, and I admire the effect. I really do seem like someone else, yet there’s me still lurking underneath. Eldan stares rather mournfully at my discarded tresses, now coating the floor in a red rope carpet.
I can’t contain the excitement anymore, and Eldan observes my grinning, exuberant features.
Damn, I think quietly. If he’s still harbouring that vindictive rage inside, it would be so easy to have him call this off now – and I would have lost all my hair and gone through this transformation for nothing.
Well, not quite nothing. It’s nice to have a change of scenery. Even if the scene is your mirror.
He says nothing, though, and eventually, we leave the suite. I hold onto Jara’s hand. The tiny brunette seems to need constant reassurance, and she appears to admires something in my manner.
My heart palpitates in fear the whole time, dreading being discovered, even though I know my disguise is distinctive enough to let me pass. Honestly, it was more my red hair than anything else. Most people here seem to be dark haired, and the few bear shifters I encounter in the street scrape and bow to Eldan, who in his princely attire is quite noticeable.
He gets annoyed and starts looking for short cuts, with Jara leading the way. It's been so long since I've been outside, my memory is rusty, but Jara has walked these streets many times before.
The assault on my senses is glorious. People selling their wares, from fruits to bread to armor, hearing their raucous voices, smelling the warm aroma of yeast and sweet cakes, the soft breeze that carries a little horse dung and grass upon the air, and the constant noise. It makes my skin prickle in delight.
I can't believe I never saw this before. I would have just walked past everything without a second glance, never taken the time to truly observe and feel the world around me.
I think I see two men eyeing us, both with the distinctive blue shade that denotes bear shifters, and then fall into step behind, but we lose them through a narrow alley, and soon it slips my mind.
When we approach the outskirts of the castle town, and walk down a winding path just off the main road, our boots sinking into grass, I see the concern in Eldan's eyes. Does he think we're leading him off into a trap?
When we stand outside the narrow entrance, partially concealed in a thicket of bushes, Eldan stares incredulously, eyes brewing their storms.
“No. My brother wouldn't have had something so secret!”
Jara and I hesitate. I feel Jara trembling beside me, and it makes me want to tremble as well.
“Neither of us have keys,” I say, when I tentatively press my palm against the hard wood entrance.
“No problem,” Eldan growls, and Jara and I instantly leap aside as he morphs into his impressive bear form, black fur coating several tons of murder. With one charge, the bear growls and breaks in the door, his claws leaving permanent scratches upon the outside.
When we walk inside, there's nothing at first. Eldan keeps his bear form, and instantly heads over to the basement, where I'm sure his keen senses can pick up on... on what's down there.
Eldan growls ominously. The door to the basement is big enough for a bear to walk through, and this one is broken in as well.
“I don't think he's going to like what's down there,” I say.
Jara shivers. “How can you stay so calm?” Her dark eyes cloud over in sorrow. “I may be a slave, but this...”
I nod. “I know.” I can smell the stench now. Taking a deep breath, I clutch Jara's palm tight, and walk into the chamber of horrors.
The memories creep back, along with the feelings I've bottled inside. The ones that made me want to give up. The bottom of the basement is huge, more like a cavern. There's no light, but there are braziers that we can illuminate – and when Jara hesitantly lights them up with her matchsticks, with me helping – we stumble over some of the bodies in the process. My skin crawls. The stench is overpowering. I try not to think about it, to look, to register what I'm smelling, and just focus on my side, lighting each brazier.
When we reveal every last object down here, Jara heads to me and holds my hand again, her eyes squeezed firmly shut, the other hand clamped over her nose, restricting her breathing.
Eldan, in his bear form, starts groaning, a low, awful sound that speaks of his horror. I see his huge, shaggy form pacing from side to side, seeing the bodies, emaciated, rotting, all of them ranging from the age of children to women who have long since been disembowelled.
The images come back in force.
Yartusk, grinning as he locks me up in the basement, as my head throbs groggily, my limbs are weak from the drink that's poisoning my veins, dulling my ability to use magic.
The women's moans and screams, as he selects an instrument from his collection, fine and long and sharp, and casually uses it to gut her, declaring that she has served her time, and proven unworthy for a prince. From the same kind of trunk Eldan keeps under his bed, ornate and beautifully carved.
The starving, bone thin girls that make up his sadistic collection.
And...
My heart clamps on itself.
No.
My foot rests against the bones of someone who has expired here. I identify the bracelet sunk between them.
It's getting hard to keep my armor on. I can't... I can't look at this. I can't be reminded.
Yartusk returns to my mind. When he turned to face me, and I attempted to defy him, whilst desperately hoping I'd regain use of my magic soon. His response though, haunts me.
He killed every last one of the people down there, then told me it was my fault for being so insubordinate. For not accepting my fate. I was supposed to be the jewel of his collection, and he wanted to break me harder than the rest.
“They died because of me,” I say eventually, and the Eldan grunts, shift
ing back into his human form, blue eyes horrified. Jara gasps and squeezes my hand tighter.
“No, that's not true. He was... he was doing this for a long time before you came along,” Jara says.
“No. He caught me. He had me chained up.” I point to one of the empty spots on the walls where a set of chains awaits, and I see dead, guilty realization seep into Eldan's eyes. What he did to me at the start was very similar to his brother.
“I had some drug in my system. I guess that's how he caught all the women. The children. I acted... defiant. Angry. Telling him I'd kill him and make sure he never hurt another person again. And he killed everyone in the basement except me. He said it was my fault he lost his temper like that, and he could easily get more replacements.”
I stare down the the bracelet of the woman it once belonged to. “She was next to me. I didn't know her name, but I remember her bracelet.”
My knees give out from under me.
“No,” Eldan whispers. “No. This can't be...” his eyes rest upon a house sigil strewn upon the wall, and scattered items on tables. I know he recognizes them as artefacts belonging to his brother. The horror flares up in his face. “You... you were right. I never knew. I really, he...” Eldan stammers into silence, grief and shock consuming him. He sees the trunk, the symbols of his brother in this place.
“I melted my chains and tried to kill him. My magic returned, after the drug bled out of my system. He ran off once he saw my powers, running for his life. And I didn't want him to escape. I chased him. He was already injured, his leg tendons melted. I caught up. And, well, I guess you know the rest.”
“They said when they found you, you were staring blankly, unresisting, by his body.” Eldan takes a deep breath. The dilemma is clear for him. “I can't show my mother and father this.”
“Maybe n-not,” Jara says, and she's pinching her nose to avoid the worst of the smell, “It might be better to have people think he died as their beloved prince. It will hurt your family to discover such depravity.”
Anger writhes. With the truth being buried, I remain hated. It's a sacrifice of me.
Eldan sees the rage. “I'm sorry, Valerie.” He clenches his hands. “Let's get out of this place.”
We gladly do, and the three of us stand on the narrow path afterwards, numb as to what to say.
Eldan clears his throat, and rests a tentative hand on my shoulder. “I've kept you unfairly. I... I was angry upon losing my brother. I never knew this. I didn't want to believe it.” He sucks at his teeth, blue eyes flashing, before saying, “I'll arrange things so you can go free. You can stay in the kingdom if you desire, since no one will recognize you, but I don't think you'd want to.”
“And my collar?” I hold my chin up.
I see the battle war. He knows after everything he's done to me, if he releases me, there's nothing to stop me burning him to cinders.
Except, I wouldn't.
Because somewhere, I understand why the prince acted the way he did. And despite everything he foisted upon me, he was kind in his own way. Confused, mostly, by my attitude, by my determination to make the most of a shitty situation. And he did listen, in the end.
I managed to store up affection for him. But I will never be a slave like that again.
Taking off my collar means he accepts I was telling the truth. That I am not as evil as he thought.
Jara watches in fascination as Eldan reaches forward, and with a click, the collar slips off. I rub my neck, sighing, instantly feeling the rush of my magic back in my blood.
Yes. “You'll let me go free?”
Eldan nods. His eyes flicker to the hovel where the bodies lie. “I'd like to see you for one more day. Though you have no obligations to me anymore.”
I consider this for a moment. “Okay,” I say. I give him a small smile, glad to have an excuse to not think about the evil. “One more day.”
He smiles back.
We start heading towards the castle, but we don't get very far. Six people step out from the underbrush next to the narrow path. All of them with gleaming blue eyes – including the two I suspected might have been following us earlier.
It doesn't take long for us to know that these six plan to kill the prince's companions and take him prisoner, to ransom him to his family.
“Come with us without a fight, and we'll make it a quick death for your slaves,” the leader says. His face is covered with hair, making it hard to discern his features. The other five companions all shift into bears, from white to brown to black, baring their teeth in menacing manners.
“We've had a really bad day,” Eldan says. He shoots a look to me. I wriggle my fingers, and Jara squeaks, clinging onto me. “So if you don't let us through right now, you won't live to regret it.”
The leader barks a laugh. “You're strong, but you're not that strong...”
I like how he utterly dismisses me as a threat. I smile sweetly at him, now forming up the spell in my mind. The prince shifts into bear form and lunges at the leader, who hastily shifts, though it's not as quick and as skilled as Eldan. The half formed bear has his throat torn out, and he fades back into human form, dead.
The other five snarl and begin to charge.
I hold out my hands, and spew out twin pillars of flame, igniting them all, so five bears now start stumbling and roaring. I don't relent on the flames and turn them hotter, going from orange to blue.
Jara still hugs my waist tightly, though I hear her cries of amazement, and Eldan hesitates upon his charge, the firelight reflected in his blue eyes.
When the last of the five bears burns up and shrinks into human form, Eldan shifts back, and stares at me in shock.
“Remind me never to get on your bad side again.”
I grin. My heart soars at the fact I have access to my magic again. I could grow drunk with the amount of freedom offered. No more cages or chains.
But I don't think I'll be able to dispel the nightmares.
Chapter Six - Valerie
Although I have every reason to leave, I don't go just yet. Now that I'm free, with the door open, I find I want to discover more about Eldan. To help him at least come to terms with the fact that the brother he looked up to was not who he seemed upon the surface.
I know the world is at my feet, though if I'm honest, it gets tiring with the constant wandering, and never having somewhere to settle. I don't think I'll be staying in this castle, not whilst there's the slightest chance I might be identified, despite my change of looks. I've had a few talks with Eldan. Now that he sees me as a person, rather than a demon, he's more nervous to touch me, to do what he did back when he saw me as dirt.
The dumb thing is, I actually miss it. The roughness of it provided a perfect distraction from my memories, from all the bodies I've seen, and for the guilt I feel for inadvertently angering Yartusk enough to slaughter his captives in that twisted basement.
When I was tossed into jail, I fully expected to die, but the long time waiting gave me repeats of that nightmare, of dreading that someone else like Yartusk might come along. Perhaps even wondering if his entire family might be responsible for this, and were covering him up. Suffice to say, Eldan had no clue. Neither does his parents, who I've only glimpsed once or twice, since I avoid the main wings of the castle.
I keep telling myself I'll go soon, but I keep staying one extra night. Eldan makes it easy for me, giving me coin to buy from the markets, a personal driver for out of town trips, and he has even offered to let Jara be my slave if I'm planning to stick around, though I think I prefer to see her as a friend who is a little bit more competent at doing house chores.
I'm given fresh clothes, those of a noblewoman's, which is a high step up from the rags I used to wear. I no longer look like a slave, but like someone dignified and wealthy.
It seems neither of us seem to want to leave one another's sight.
Perhaps because now we all share the same nightmare.
I wake up gasping one night, and Eldan's h
overing over my bed, blue eyes wide in concern as he's shushing and stroking my short black hair. Dimly, I register the small chamber I sleep in, separate from Eldan's, and the sweat Eldan's mopping off my brow, and my frantically beating heart.
“It's okay, it's okay,” he says, trying to soothe me. I swallow air, brain vaguely remembering the nightmare, then I sigh.
“Sorry. I've been having these kind of dreams on and off for a while.”
The bear prince examines the gray ceiling with a dour look upon his face. “I noticed you having nightmares. I'm a light sleeper at best, so when I hear noises, I always go over to check on you.”
It doesn't surprise me. I clutch onto Eldan's arm now for support and comfort. “Just a shame it took you so long to believe. Not that I blame you for wanting to see your brother as someone good.”
His expression droops. “I feel bad for having treated you as I did. You were right all along. But it doesn't matter if you're right. You'll be killed if word gets out on who you are.”
“It's why I need to go,” I say, though my statement is half-hearted.
“Yes,” he murmurs, his blue eyes observing me for a moment.
Testing the waters, delving into the hidden reason why I'm so reluctant to go, but less willing to admit to myself, my hand snakes around his neck and pulls his lips close, so I can touch them with mine.
We've not kissed before. The contact sends electric shivers through us. His musky, wild aroma trickles through my senses, enticing me to him, and my lips continue moving against his with delicacy, taking the time to get to know him through his kindness.
He's patient and adapts to it, and I can tell he's melting into the moment as much as I am. Already, my panties are becoming soaked, and my hands trail along his taut, corded muscles, and the bump of bone in his elbow. His erection becomes noticeable, and I help tease him out of the confines of his pants, letting it spring free. He adjusts so he's on top of me, shoulder muscles rippling as he gently grinds against my body, kissing me in earnest, sometimes diving into my neck. I sigh into the embrace, and undress myself for him, the emotions in my stomach floating, as if I'm drunk on desire.
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