“Make sure you stay, I think some of them got hit bad. Do your part.”
“Of course.”
The casualties start lining up. We drag them into the house, the bunker is too far away at this point. Some of the men are dead – there’s three soldiers gone, and two are injured badly. I keep praying, though it’s horrible of me to do this, that I won’t see Baker or White amongst the wounded who are being pulled in from where all the action is hitting hardest.
I push the fear out of my mind as best as I can, and tend to the poor souls in front of me, doing everything possible to keep them alive and keep them calm.
It’s not so long though, before it’s obvious that the battle is going south. We’re severely outnumbered, and my current charge, a young woman caught in the crossfire whilst trying to bring water to the soldiers and her husband, is lying there gasping from her lung injury.
“You have to leave her!” Barnes roars at me. “If you stay, you’ll die!”
“No!” I screech. This woman could be saved. She needs some care, certainly, and not to be violently removed, but I can save her.
“You stay, you die. Your choice.”
I gnash my teeth as he abandons me on the spot, and I see the other soldiers fleeing. I know it’s pointless to have me die here when I can save others, but it hurts to know that I am leaving this young woman to die, after everything she’s done for us.
It hurts, but I leave, because I know that I can’t stay.
My heart shrivels as I leave the unconscious woman behind. Moments later, a grenade flies threw the house, shattering it, and more RPGs fire onto the streets where I’m running. The enemy is everywhere. We’ve been holding out for as long as we can, but it’s still not dawn, and everyone is now squished towards the back of the city, staking the walls and alleyways for their final stand. We’re in danger, for sure.
Desperation steers everyone to greater heights. The fortified position looks like it might be able to hold out, even with grenade fire, but it’s dubious as to how long. I shoulder through the crowd, searching, and I find Alex Baker as he’s reloading his gun. He spots me, a smile flashes over his ruggedly handsome face, and he seizes me in a brief hug.
“Is Jason with you?”
Alex shakes his head sadly. “Unfortunately he isn’t. We got separated when they overrun our last position.”
The information fills me with a sense of foreboding. It’s already horrible that I had to leave that woman to die. I don’t want to lose Alex or Jason as well, not when I’m getting to know them, to like them.
The enemy begins their inexorable advance on our final position, our last stand, and the fire is relentless both sides. It’s just ten soldiers our side with a few civilians, against what looks like dozens of insurgents, far more than we can handle. We have a death grip in the alleyways though, bitterly trading for every inch of ground we lose. I help to drag people who are caught or grazed, barely avoiding the teeth of hell myself, and I admire Alex’s skills. He’s quick, professional, even with the immense pressure of everything around him – just like Barnes.
It’s not enough, though. One bullet sinks into Baker’s leg, not skimming it this time, and he collapses onto the ground as the bullets erupt overhead. Heart in mouth, I dash to him from the man I’m tending, ducking the shots. I reach him and I start tying a bandage around his leg to stop the bleeding after analysing the damage.
Pain sears my side.
I gasp, clapping a hand over the pain, and it comes away soaked in blood. I’m hit. I tighten the bandage around Alex’s leg, then slump against him as I try, feebly, feeling the blood drain out of me, to staunch the worst of it. I see people falling around me. I hear their screams above the booms and the shooting.
It must be over. We can’t possibly survive this. They’re breaching our defenses.
I close my eyes, preparing for the worst, when a new, bone shattering explosion rips the air.
I hold my breath in terror as the insurgents start yelling. More explosions. Engines whining. Boots crunching the dust. English voices barking orders.
The cavalry has arrived.
I stare at towards the rising sun, and sigh. We made it. We held out long enough.
We survived.
Chapter Six
I spend the night being patched up with a bunch of other people. It looks like with the backup, we also have another field hospital team set with them, and the wounded are quickly sorted through, with the worst being given rides to our main hospitals.
My injury isn’t great, but I force myself out of bed as soon as I feel able to walk, to help the medics with their assessment of the injuries. More are being brought to the bunker by the minute, and we need all the hands on deck.
The nurse who helped tend to me is less than approving, but she also sees the stubborn glint in my eyes. I’m not exactly willing to sit back and take it easy when others might be dying before me.
I can’t leave them behind, like I did with that woman. The pain throbs through me, but I do my best to disguise it, knowing if it’s too obvious, the nurse will be chaining me to the bed without parole.
The amount of injuries is staggering. It feels like virtually the whole town got hit, and out of the remaining original platoon, only eight made it until the end, and a few are in critical condition.
Alex hobbles after me at one point, bored restless, and he stops in alarm when he sees me standing over Jason White, who has just been brought in, and there’s two children with him, who are near hysterical.
“Please, please save the nice man,” one child whimpers, their English accented but clear. “He saved us.”
The other child, slightly older, nods. His eyes flicker in emotion, and his voice quavers as he says: “He jumped in the way. He took the bullets. We owe him our lives.”
The boy’s mother and father come in, and they jabber their thanks, bowing to the soldier, offering their prayers that he will make it.
“No,” Alex whispers. He sees the bullet holes in his friend’s back.
Swallowing my own anxiety, I check out the injury, and breathe a sigh of relief. No major arteries penetrated, lungs intact, but he can still go into shock, bleed out, or go with complications if the bullets aren’t removed properly.
I do everything I can, reassuring the distraught Alex Baker that his friend will be okay. I’ll help him. He won’t die on our watch.
He squeezes my hand briefly in thanks as I get on with it, working to make sure he doesn’t lose any more blood, taking out the two lodged bullets without damaging anything further, before disinfecting the wounds and stitching them up.
It takes two hours, and I’m fighting my own pain the whole way, but with a quick blood transfusion from the small supply of blood we have, he’s stabilized.
And I’m slightest woozy from blood loss.
Jason remained unconscious through all my administrations. Alex sees me slipping as I finish up my work, and he grunts as he hobbles me to a bed and tells me in no uncertain terms to not kill myself working for other people.
I barely utter a sentence before I’m out like a light.
Chapter Seven
Fast forward a couple of weeks, later, and we’re being discharged.
The chaos of the battle is over, but we lost some good men, and a lot of innocent civilians died when they didn’t need to.
All of us saw something that night that we would never want to see again. I still see that woman, lying injured, relying on someone like me to help her out. I still see that house being blown up, and it would have taken me with it. I hear the screams, the piteous wails of people, and I know there’s nothing glorious at all about war, nothing at all. It’s horrible and brutal and everyone thinks they’re fighting for the greater good.
Jason and Alex saw one of their comrades have his brains splattered across the dust, they saw a kid who was kicked and beaten to death, and they saw people they had to leave behind, screaming for help, crying their feelings of betrayal.
For Jason, saving those two children was the highlight of the entire night, to know that his body made an effective shield, that those bullets would have slammed into them, but instead, they took him down. His Kevlar vest prevented the worst of the injuries, but some still got through, of course.
We’ve all focused on recovering. We’re being sent back home, as well. All of us sustained injuries that put us out of action for a while. My injuries were worse than expected. I had ruptured intestines, and I needed some extensive surgery to not bleed out. Alex’s bone is shattered from the bullet that went through, and he’s still in splints now. Jason, of course, wasn’t allowed to move from his bed for at least two weeks, and he still needs time to fully recover.
All of us will be getting purple hearts. It’s nice to be acknowledged that way, but it doesn’t take away the fact that we saw and experienced things that no other person should ever endure.
I cannot get over the fact that I had to leave people behind. It doesn’t matter that it was the best decision to make, that I need to be alive to save other people.
It still doesn’t take away the memory that’s burnt into my mind. It doesn’t matter in the end that I made the right call or not. It matters that the poor woman had to even be in that situation at all.
We sit in the hangar of our plane now, waiting to be airlifted back home. During the recovery process, we’ve had plenty of time to think, to talk to one another, and to slowly peel away the onion layers of our time out here, to process what we could do once we get back home.
“I already know what I’ll be doing,” I say, sighing as I rest my back against the cold metal wall, with Alex and Jason on either side of me. “I’ll be continuing my work as a nurse or paramedic. With my credentials, I imagine I have that sorted. But what about you two? What’s your thoughts for the future?”
I reach out to hold both their hands, and I enjoy the warmth of their comforting presence. Truthfully, I imagine a future where somehow, all of us are living together in the same house. However, I know those kind of dreams are usually dashed to the ground. They are silly fancies that we can’t subject ourselves to, because then we lose sight of everything else.
We’ve not had as much time as I would have liked together during our recovering, to progress our talks further than the fact we enjoyed what had happened – and to think of the future. Most of us expected to be working in Algeria for longer, but all of us have suffered injuries and enough chaos to warrant being sent home as heroes.
Not that we feel like heroes. It’s not so cut and dry. We glorify the idea of being heroes, but we’re not. We’re just people in the wrong place at the wrong time, or right place, right time, depending on how you want to look at all. We did everything we could to just not die on the spot, but most of us did succumb to the insurgents by the time reinforcements arrived, despite my best efforts.
Despite everyone’s best efforts.
“I don’t know, honestly,” Jason says, and his expression falls. I squeeze his hand, and he accepts the comfort with a long exhale. “I was the drop out. And I don’t want to go back to my parents. I don’t even know if they can take me back, really. They didn’t have so much love for me. It won’t be a nice reunion.”
“Surely you have an idea of what you want to do, though?” I’m astonished and perhaps ignorant. I’ve always had a clear plan in mind when it comes to my future. I’ve always known I would end up caring for others.
“No. I don’t have the skill sets to do anything. Maybe I could be a drill instructor or something, but I wouldn’t be placing bets for that to happen, you know.”
“I’ll do anything,” Alex cuts in with a grunt. “I’ll work my ass off in a McDonald’s or something, take on any odd jobs I can until I’m on my feet. Thinking of applying for college. I got in, you know, but my family thought it would be better for me to serve. More heroic, I suppose.”
“Neither of you wanted to be here?” I gape at them.
They shake their heads. “Don’t get me wrong,” Jason says. “I’m glad I did come. If I hadn’t, then I wouldn’t know Alex or you. But it wasn’t my first choice.”
I nod, though the revelation still stuns me.
I’m the only one who wanted to be here.
At least, though, none of us regret it.
“I want to stay in contact with you both,” I confess. “I don’t want to lose either of you. Not after what we’ve seen, what we’ve experienced. There’s a whole future waiting for us out there. I’d like it if you were both involved in that future, too.”
Both of them stare at me for such a long time then, that I feel the heat rising to my face. Please, I think. Please don’t leave me.
I can’t explain it precisely, but I’d love to have a Bohemian lifestyle with them. I love how open they are with each other, and how we slot into each other’s lives without much boat rocking going on. We’ve only been together for such a short time, and yet it feels like infinity. Maybe, just maybe, we were meant to meet.
Even if neither of them planned to be in the army, I’m glad I found them.
“To be honest,” Alex says, and I see hesitation upon his rugged face, in his dark eyes. He runs a nervous hand through his blonde hair, and I can see the nervous pulse of his heartbeat in his neck. “I want to keep in contact with you guys. But I’m afraid… of explaining it to other people. Of convincing them that this is what I want and it’s not just some spur of the moment rash decision that will all crumble apart within a few weeks.”
“Then don’t,” Jason says. “Don’t bother explaining. Their opinions don’t matter. We have something good here, the three of us. And, we both owe Jenny here our lives. If she wants me to be in her future, well, I’m sitting up and listening. If she wants all of us together – don’t be an ass. Go for it.”
Jason’s stark admission makes me smile, and Alex eventually allows one to play across his lips as well. Their smiles are beautiful and encouraging, and send me floating.
“Thank you, Jason. I’ll tell you what I’ve been secretly thinking over the weeks, when we’ve been healing and I’ve not been fixated on the people I failed at the town.”
“That wasn’t your fault,” Jason says, but I wave a hand to silence him.
“That doesn’t matter. I’m a nurse, I hate seeing people die. I wouldn’t forgive myself for trying everything in my power to keep someone’s heart beating, their mouths talking. Anyway, what I’ve been secretly thinking is of the idea that all of us can be in a house together. All three of us. And you can both look for jobs to get back on your feet, and I’ll be hauling in my nurse wages to keep us stable. We’ll watch T.V and eat pizza and live together without any fear of what other people might think about us.”
I feel a weight lift in my heart as I confess this. I know dreams don’t always come true, but it’s nice to air them out. Especially to the two main subjects of my dream.
Alex leans forward then to kiss me on the forehead. “You know what? I like this vision.”
“Me, too,” Jason adds with a smirk.
“Just don’t get too randy with one another without having me in on the action on occasion, okay?”
They laugh at that, and already, my heart feels a little lighter.
We talk a little more on the matter, discussing what we’ll be doing when we get back to our homes, how soon we can likely move – what state we might want to live in. The fact we’re sitting here and so candidly discussing this fills me with positivity.
Maybe my dream will come true.
Maybe we can live together, and it will all work out in the end.
Some more soldiers join the hangar, all with wounds that have incapacitated them one way or another. I see three amputees, and one guy who has a bandage covering one of his eyes. He gives us a weary thumb up, and we stop discussing our future plans for the moment, now focusing on the other soldiers.
The plane roars into action a few minutes later, and we’re off. There’s not much of a view in t
his place, but we have each other for company. I notice I’m the only woman in the launch, and Jason and Alex are passively protective of me, directing evil glares to anyone who checks me out for longer than necessary.
I fall asleep during the ride home, hopeful of what the future might bring.
They want to share it with me. It’s not just some wistful fancy. For me, it’s reality. Part of me is still afraid that once we step off into our home states, we’re just going to drop out of each other’s sphere of influence, and we’re never going to talk again.
The other, bigger part knows that I can trust these men. They want to be with me, and I with them.
We can make it work.
Chapter Eight – Three months later
The warfront seems light years away. It can be hard to remember that we have such places of conflict upon our own planet.
The memories might have been too much at some points, if it wasn’t for Baker and White. We did move in together, in the end. We packed up and went to a quiet place, one with beautiful scenery – North Dakota. A small village nearby provides all our basic food needs, and the Canadian border isn’t so far away, meaning we can make day trips into Canada by car. We’ve done so a few times by now, and it’s been glorious.
What’s more glorious is the exclusive access I have with both men. We’ve had more than our fair share of fulfilment, and job wise, it’s been pretty good as well. I’m a nurse in a local hospital an hour’s drive away, and I don’t mind so far making the journey five days a week. Jason and Alex both work as ranch hands on a nearby ranch. The pay isn’t great, but they get fantastic selections of dairy products and food which makes up for a lot of it – plus, rent is pretty cheap in our neck of the woods.
I’m on top of Jason right now, staring into his light blue eyes, marvelling at the way they catch the light, and appreciating the golden flecks that rim the iris. I kiss next to his sclera, and grind my naked body against his, allowing his length to slip into me. My body is always hungry to have him and Alex inside me, though Alex isn’t home yet. I ride him hard and fast, groaning with the effort, drowning in the sweet sensation that ripples through me. He clutches my hips tight, urging me to go faster, and I oblige, as I breathe in the manly scent of him, feel his rough hairs tickle over my chest.
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