“OH MY GOD!” Beth came again, and this time they all collapsed into the suddenly cool water of the fountain.
Mike’s stomach hurt so bad, he thought he might throw up, and he had to fight for every gasp of air. The woman on top of him had gone motionless, hanging limply off his body. “Beth?” he asked, trying to sit up.
Naia leaned over both of them, a smirk on her face. “Oh, she’s out.” Naia snapped her fingers in front of Beth’s face, nodding in satisfaction. “I used some of that sexual energy to knock her out for a few hours. That’ll give us time to get her home.”
“It seems weird that your magic includes making people fall sleep,” Mike said, swallowing between breaths. His throat suddenly dry, he pulled his cock free of Beth. A large amount of semen leaked out, pooling up between her thighs.
“How do you think I drown people? Much easier to do it that way.” Naia waved her hand gently in circles over Beth’s abdomen. She groaned in her sleep, and Mike watched a giant puddle of cum appear beneath her as every ounce of his spunk was forced out. “And that will keep her from getting pregnant. You came quite a lot, you know. I’m a little jealous.”
“Yeah, good thinking. Birth control wasn’t part of my plan,” Mike admitted, his heart rate finally calming down. He looked over at Tink, who stood scowling at Jenny. “I’m just glad it worked.”
“I am too. A normal person can barely handle that kind of biofeedback-I’m not surprised that Jenny got scared and bailed with her senses extra raw. That was a phenomenal idea, much better than killing the host.” Naia waved a hand, causing the cum to be washed away by fountain water. “Jenny probably did think she was going to die, for real this time.”
“It is called ‘the little death’, after all.” Mike grinned, struggling to stand. He grabbed Beth by the wrist and pulled, but his legs wobbled beneath him. “Hey, Abella, a little help?”
Abella, who had been watching from the back door, walked into the fountain and hefted Beth with ease.
Mike stood with Naia’s help, and climbed carefully over the side of the fountain. Abella set Beth down on the chair they had brought out earlier, then carefully adjusted her dress to cover her up a bit more.
Tink walked up to Mike, Jenny clutched tightly in her hands. “Jenny go back to Vault,” she declared, shaking the doll in Mike’s face. “Jenny in huge trouble.”
“Give me a minute,” Mike replied. “I want to see the Vault for myself.” He stretched, trying to pop a sore spot in his back, when he noticed them. Dark, vine-like growths, all across the edge of the yard, twisting through the bushes. Before they had started, the yard had been clear, but now it was covered in the stuff as far as he could see around the corner of the house.
“Shit.” The Mandragora had returned, searching for a meal. It moved slowly, the vines covered in frost, so Mike felt he wasn’t currently in any danger. Still, he moved a little bit quicker than he had. “C’mon, Tink. Abella, go ahead and bring Beth inside, I’ll figure out what to do with her when I get back.”
Tink nodded, clutching Jenny tightly in both hands like she was going to run away. It made Mike wonder if she even could, the doll appearing to be nothing out of the ordinary. Mike changed into the spare pants he had left by the side of the pool-he had expected to get more than a little wet. After casting a wary eye at the Mandragora, he went into the house, following Tink to the front room and back through the kitchen. She opened a door just past the pantry, revealing a concrete flight of steps, leading down. He followed her into the darkness, squinting when she pulled the string on bulb that swung above an old freezer. The basement was empty-Mike spun around in circles looking for an additional doorway.
“Where is the Vault?” he asked, taking a look behind the freezer, half expecting to find a tunnel there.
“Vault like all special place. Have to know secret.” Tink squatted next to the freezer and pulled out a piece of chalk from beneath it. Mike watched her draw a large rectangle on the concrete wall, complete with a circle for the doorknob. After tossing the chalk back beneath the freezer, Tink knocked three times, waited, then knocked twice.
With a flash of light, the chalk drawing turned into a wooden door. Mike’s mouth hung open when Tink pulled the knob of the magic door, opening it to reveal a large room full of random objects. Long tables and shelves made Mike think of a pawn shop. Keeping a safe distance, he watched Tink stand on a steel stool to set Jenny up on a shelf in the back of the room.
“You stay there,” Tink announced, scowling at the creepy little doll. “Think about what you did.” She scrambled back out and closed the door. After a couple of seconds, it turned into a chalk outline once more.
“How many rooms in the house are like that?” Mike asked.
Tink frowned. “Tink try remember, but fuzzy in head. Remember Vault when see Jenny. But lots.”
Mike sighed. “Yeah, of course.” Shaking his head, he followed Tink back upstairs. It was time to take care of their unexpected guest.
“OW.” BETH’S BATHROOM came into focus, her eyes struggling against the suddenly harsh light. Wincing, she sat up in the bath, one hand immediately on her sore vagina. She struggled to standing, then managed to grab her towel off the rack before wrapping it delicately around her mid-section. Her legs were weak, like she had run a marathon.
Her ankle felt sprained. There was a weird, half memory of running through a cave and twisting it in the back of her mind. She put a hand against her head, wondering why it was pounding so hard. Shuffling out of the bathroom, she accidentally kicked the empty merlot bottle on the floor. Kneeling to pick it up, she dropped it in the trashcan next to the sink, and cried out when it cracked against another empty bottle within, the sound bouncing around her skull like angry ping pong balls.
“Shit.” Had she seriously downed two bottles by herself? Why? She hadn’t done anything remotely blackout drunk since freshman year of college. Rubbing her lower belly (which was oddly sore), she walked out of the bathroom and into the cool, dark apartment.
“Ah, geez.” Shaking her head in disbelief, Beth didn’t know whether to laugh or throw up. Strewn about her home were the majority of her dildos, strapped to the bed, suction cupped to the tile beneath her kitchen counter, the Delightful Dragon suctioned to the floor in the middle of the room. She nearly slipped in the puddle of lube that had formed by the side of her bed next to the overturned bottle.
She pulled a pack of Tylenol out of her nightstand and swallowed four tablets. As best she could tell, she got absolutely hammered and then gang banged herself all over the apartment. She didn’t know if she was horrified that she had taken it so far, or mad that she had no memory of it. Her stomach and leg muscles hurt, making her regret all of the orgasms she couldn’t remember.
Well, there was one. She had been having a weird fantasy—Mike plowing her from behind while a woman with blue-green hair had eaten her out. The whole fantasy was a mess of sound and light, and her vision had gone dark when she came, no doubt stumbling to the bathtub after. She shivered in delight, she sat on the bed, deciding that it was best to clean up the mess tomorrow-she had no desire to do anything else with her evening, and she was obviously hung over. Peeling back the covers of the bed, she glanced up to see her copy of The Hobbit sitting by itself.
The Jenny doll was missing.
Icy fingers crawled up her spine, ran through her hair, down the sides of her neck, and all along her body. There was something about the doll, something she really didn’t like. Looking around the room, she realized that she didn’t see it anywhere, an idea that triggered a suddenly strong sense of paranoia.
Crawling beneath the covers, her only thought on the matter was that it had probably creeped her out while she was drunk and fucking herself. Promising that she would look for it in the morning, she put the matter out of her mind and fell promptly asleep.
MIKE HAD DOZED OFF in his Uber. The driver, a twenty-something wearing a black vest, gently shook him awake. “We’re at your destination
, sir.” The Uber driver held the door for Mike. Mike slid out of the car, his muscles protesting. “I hope you and your daughter have a good night.”
“Thank you,” Mike said, Tink following behind him. The hoodie she had borrowed from Mike was pulled up over her head, covering most of her face. Mike had laid the groundwork when the driver had arrived, explaining that his daughter had just participated in a Youtuber’s video about Lord of the Rings or Dungeons and Dragons, he wasn’t sure, but hey, she made a hundred bucks. The driver had paid no attention to Tink whatsoever-children didn’t get to rate Uber drivers. Watching the man drive away, Mike marveled at how easy it had been to get home, definitely the easiest part of the night.
They had driven Beth home in her car, and it had taken some work to get her into the house. They had to wait until it was fairly late, so Naia had kept Beth in magically-induced sleep for the whole evening. Tink had helped Mike get Beth to her room, and then the two of them had trashed the place, making it look like she had gone on a bender.
Tink was the one who had discovered the briefcase in the closet. Even without her goggles, she had been able to get it open before Mike had finished filling the bath. For whatever reason, Tink took great delight in attaching the dildos to every surface she could find, even asking Mike if they could take one home. She had grumbled at him when he told her no.
Cecilia greeted them at the door, then vanished from sight as they crossed into the home. The whole house felt tired, a spiritual exhaustion that had settled in once Jenny had been trapped back in the doll.
It was a long climb up the stairs. Mike clutched the railing tightly, pulling himself upward. He couldn’t remember the last time he had felt so tired.
Tink was even slower, the little goblin mumbling to herself as they crossed the threshold of the bedroom.
Naia had a warm bath waiting for them. Mike and Tink got in, and they took turns washing each other’s backs while Naia sent jet-like pulses through the water, targeting sore muscles. Gone was any sexual energy, the day having sapped away all of their strength. Mike leaned back in the tub, Naia acting as his pillow, while he waited for Tink to wash her hair.
“Today was too much.” Mike sighed, Naia’s fingers gently massaging his shoulders. “I was feeling better this morning, but I just feel rotten now. I screwed up-someone almost got seriously hurt.”
“You’ll get the hang of this life. All of the Caretakers have.” Warmth seeped into Mike’s weary bones. “You’ve only been here a few days, after all.”
Mike stared at the ceiling. Had it really only been a few days? It felt like weeks already. This house was full of so many mysteries, and he hadn’t even made the effort to explore it yet. His thoughts turned once more to the Mandragora. He needed to stop forgetting to deal with that plant. Lost in thought, he jumped when Tink dragged her claws along the bottom of his foot, tickling him.
“Husband too serious,” she said, then gathered a mouthful of water. She stood up in the bath, striking a sexy pose and spit the water out, fountain-style, hitting Mike in the face. “Now Tink is nymph too,” she announced, grabbing her breasts and playfully squeezing them. “Use water magic, make sexy time for everyone.”
“I don’t think so,” Mike replied, making a scoop with his hands. Placing his thumb on the top, he squeezed, launching a spray of water between his thumbs at the goblin. Tink ducked, but was hit in the face anyway. Laughing, she took a deep breath and vanished beneath the surface of the water, eventually biting Mike's foot.
“Gah!” Mike yanked his foot out of the water, pulling Tink with it. He grabbed her by the horn, splashing water in her face with his free hand as she fought to defend herself. Tink twisted around and bit Mike’s forearm while she kicked water at him. Laughing, Mike tickled Tink’s bare bottom, and she let out a laugh of her own, falling back beneath the waves. Mike tried to pull Tink above the water, but Naia joined the fun, summoning several watery fingers that tickled both of them from underneath. The bathroom filled with laughter and more splashing, Tink and Mike struggling to dunk Naia, who simply disappeared beneath the water’s surface every time they shoved her.
Several minutes later, Mike stepped out of the bath, a large grin on his face. He helped Tink out, then placed a gentle kiss on Naia’s lips before she sank below the water and disappeared from sight. Mike and Tink dried off, then Tink put on her sleep shirt while Mike donned his boxers. Lying down on the bed, Mike let out a sigh when Tink grabbed onto his arm, using it like a giant pillow.
He was going to make screw ups and have rough days. It was a fact of life, everybody had them. However, it mattered more how he spent his time between those awful moments, because that was where he would find those happy, peaceful hours, making memories that would become more precious to him than gold. Lying there in bed, listening to the goblin next to him breathing softly, he couldn’t help but feel a little blessed to be surrounded by such magical creatures.
“You sure do keep my life interesting,” he whispered. Tink gently bit his arm, and he smiled. She shifted her body, scooting up closer to his face. Her hair smelled of lavender, and her skin was soft to the touch. Letting his body relax, he took in the scent of the house itself, allowing its smells to permeate his soul and guide him to sleep.
The world faded away, his body sinking into nothingness while sleep claimed him. Drifting off into the waiting darkness, one more scent tickled his nose, suddenly there and gone, like a match struck and then blown out.
It smelled of sulfur.
Nightmares and Dreamscapes
Mike’s soul floated, hiding just beneath his skin, dreading the moment that his eyes would open, streaming reality in high definition through his very being. It wasn’t that he was afraid to face the morning, but rather that he was afraid of how much pain he would be in upon awakening.
The morning before, his whole being had been in agony. Between fucking Jenny out of Beth and then carrying Beth home, he wondered if his body would decide to be tired or sore instead. How does a body decide how miserable to make its owner anyway? Mike contemplated his day from behind closed eyes, wondering if he could trick Tink into bringing him food to eat while he stayed in bed. She didn’t know how to cook and he was fairly certain the fridge was nearly empty.
Shit. He also needed to feed the Mandragora. He pictured those vines, creeping along the side of the house, searching for fresh meat. With the events of yesterday, it had been forgotten, but it needed to be a priority today. How much meat did a magical plant need? He saw Emily in his mind, tossing a couple of pounds of beef on the lawn. The plant was probably far hungrier after so many months without food. Or maybe it had taken to eating strays that happened onto the lawn?
Ugh. Eyes open, he silently cursed the light that was already crossing the floor of his room. Pushing the blankets away, he saw that Tink had already left. Braced for the worst, he sat up in bed, ready for the inevitable checklist of agonies to pile up.
Except nothing happened. Puzzled, he rolled his shoulders around, tilted his head back and forth, and wiggled his legs. He felt absolutely fine.
“What the fuck?” He wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth. Rising, he got out of bed and walked to the toilet, took a leak, and popped into the bathroom. The huge bath was empty.
“Hey, Naia.” He sat on the edge of the tub, waiting for the faucet to turn on. Strangely, the tub remained silent. “Hello?” he called, leaning in, waiting for her to appear. He sat this way for several minutes, surprised that she didn’t answer. Shaking his head, he figured he would go out to the garden and see what she was up to. He went to put on clothes and was surprised to find they had been put back in his bag. Tink must have cleaned up after him last night.
Walking down the hallway, he was surprised at how quiet the house was. At the top of the stairs, he stopped to stare at the wardrobe at the other end of the hall, its silver handle gleaming, begging to be opened.
“Feed the Mandragora, feed the Mandragora,” he muttered, walking do
wnstairs. In the kitchen, his laptop was on the table, but there was no sign of Tink. After making himself a quick breakfast of Eggos and coffee, he turned his laptop on, then clicked on his web browser.
Nothing happened. Frowning, he tried again, but the program still wouldn’t open. He rebooted his computer, then ate his syrup-soaked Eggos, slammed his coffee and refilled his mug while he waited. His computer screen came back on, but it wouldn’t display anything other than a blue screen.
“What the fuck?” Either it had contracted a massive virus, or was experiencing hardware failure. Swearing to himself, he wondered if Tink had been screwing around on his laptop this morning. “Tink? Hey, Tink!” Wandering from room to room, he saw no sign of the goblin. In fact, everything was in perfect order, the mess from yesterday’s fight all cleaned up as if it hadn’t even happened.
“Strange.” After casting a suspicious glance at the living room, Mike walked out into the garden and stopped in his tracks. Naia’s fountain was caked in dirt and mud again, as if he had never cleaned it out. Running up to the edge, all he could think was that, somehow, the magic had been cut off from her spring again.
“Shit, shit, shit!” He shoved his way into the garage and maneuvered through the boxes to get to the work bench. After grabbing supplies, he ran back outside. “Tink! Abella! Help!”
Kneeling in the fountain, he frantically scrubbed at the caked mud, trying to remember where he had seen the water flowing from. “Naia! Naia, are you in there?”
As he scooped up dirt, he saw the stony figure hidden behind the bushes. “Abella! Abella, come help me!”
Radley's Home for Horny Monsters Page 18