He licked suddenly dry lips. He’d done that. He’d made her wary after so much effort to make her comfortable around him. He took a step into the room, but stopped when her brows drew together in a frown. “What are you doing here?”
He held up the bag full of stuffed animals—the ones he’d won for her at the fair but never had the chance to give her. They’d both forgotten them in the car when he’d dropped her off. “I come bearing presents.”
Well, that was enough to win over the room…but not Addison. She stayed where she was as the kids who’d been huddled around her flocked to his side to see what he’d brought. He was heartened to see that while her gaze remained watchful and wary, she had yet to kick him out or even give him a lecture on what a jerk he’d been the other night.
She seemed to be waiting…withholding judgment.
Another reason she was better than he was—he’d have leapt to anger if someone had rejected him the way he’d done to her. He never had handled hurt all that well, and her maturity made him feel that much more unworthy.
But he could be worthy of her…he would be.
He just needed a second chance.
“I like this one,” a little boy said as he tugged out a stuffed monkey.
“Excellent choice,” he told the kid. “Many rings were tossed to earn that particular monkey.”
The boy’s answering grin was filled with toothless gaps and the sort of pure, genuine happiness that only a small child could experience.
Well, a small child…and Addison.
She’d given him a similar smile when he’d won it. A smile that was artless and filled with joy. His heart clenched in his chest. He wanted more of those smiles. He wanted more nights like that. He wanted more kisses, too, but one thing at a time.
He barely knew her. She barely knew him. What they needed was time to get to know one another. What he wanted was time to make her see what they could have.
He wasn’t even entirely sure himself but for the first time in his life, he knew that he couldn’t just walk away. That had to mean something, right?
Addison finally got out of her seat and walked toward him slowly now that most of the kids had returned to what they were doing. The boy still stood there holding the monkey and Addison stopped at his side and crouched down so she was at eye level. “This is an excellent choice, Thomas.”
She sounded so sincere, so very serious, that he found himself waiting to hear what she had to say with as much fascination as the little boy.
“I like monkeys,” he said quietly, matching her sincerity with a heartfelt earnestness that made his chest tighten all over again.
“I do too,” Addison said. “But do you know what’s so special about this particular monkey?”
Thomas shook his head.
“Deputy Parker here won this monkey in a feat of courage.”
Colton pressed his lips together to keep from laughing, and when the little boy looked up at him for confirmation he managed to match their seriousness with a firm nod.
Addison finally turned her gaze up to meet his and that was when he knew it—he was done for. He was drowning in those bottomless eyes, aching to be even closer…
It might’ve been quick, but try telling that to his heart. His heart which leapt at the sight of her like it couldn’t wait to get closer to her…his sweet, shy, courageous new friend.
Addison turned her gaze to the little boy, and Colton could breathe again. “You know what that means, don’t you?” she asked.
Thomas shook his head.
She held the monkey up again so it was facing the little boy. “It means that whenever this monkey is near, you get an extra dose of courage.”
“But he can’t come into the surgery with me,” he said.
Colton tensed. Surgery? What surgery? But Addison seemed to know. She reached for his hands and soon they were both holding onto the monkey. “Doesn’t matter,” she said. “He just has to be near.”
She sounded so certain, no one could have doubted her. The boy’s eyes widened before he snatched the stuffed animal out of her hands and held it close. “Really?”
But he wasn’t asking her, he’d turned to look at Colton. He nodded. “Absolutely.” He hesitated as Addison watched him. “Actually, this monkey gave me the courage I needed to come here today.”
The boy’s face screwed up. “You needed courage?”
Colton scoffed. “Of course.”
Thomas didn’t look convinced. “But you’re a grown-up and grown-ups don’t get scared.”
Colton widened his eyes. “Who told you that pile of lies?”
Thomas’s mouth twitched up at his reaction, and he saw Addison biting her lip as well.
Colton crouched down so all of them were at the same eye level. “Thomas, everyone gets scared. Everyone.”
“Even you?”
“Especially me.” He could feel Addison’s eyes on him. He had her attention. He kept his gaze fixed on Thomas as he forced himself to be as vulnerable as Addison had been. Her vulnerability was her strength, and she deserved the same in return.
“Do you know that I got so scared a few days ago that I actually ran away?”
Thomas’s eyes grew wide. “You did?”
“I did.”
“What scared you?”
“It wasn’t so much a what as a who.” He swallowed, meeting the little boy’s eyes and trying his hardest to push past the urge to laugh off his fears, to pretend that nothing was wrong. He could lighten the moment with a quick smile and a funny joke. But that would cheapen this moment, and it wouldn’t be fair to either Addison or Thomas.
“Grown-ups are funny sometimes,” he said slowly. “We like to think that we have it all together. That we always know what we’re doing. Sometimes someone comes along and changes that. They knock you off your feet and spin your whole world upside down.”
“Why would they do that?” Thomas asked, his voice breathy and soft. He was watching Colton like he had all the answers.
I wish, kid. I wish.
He could hear Addison’s shallow breathing, felt her gaze tugging at him. Steeling himself for her reaction, he turned to meet that steady gaze. Her lips were parted and her eyes…oh her eyes. He saw a world of possibilities in those eyes.
If he didn’t mess it all up first.
“Why would someone spin your world upside down?” Thomas asked.
Colton drew in a deep breath. “It’s hard to explain, buddy.
Thomas made a face. “Grown-up stuff?”
He laughed and Addison did too. The laughter seemed to ease some of the weighty tension between them. “Yeah, kid. Something like that.”
Thomas nodded, suddenly seeming far older than his years. “What did this person do that was so scary?”
Colton cleared his throat and blurted out the truth. “She got close.”
Addison met his gaze, her eyes widening in surprise.
“And you don’t like people getting close?” Thomas asked.
Colton shifted, his legs starting to cramp from this prolonged squat. He scratched the back of his neck and forced his gaze to meet Addison’s again. “I’m just not used to it. Sometimes new experiences…new feelings…take some time to get used to.”
“Yeah, I get that,” Thomas said.
Addison gave him a small, tremulous smile. “Yeah, I get that too.”
Her voice was so quiet, so soft, but it was the most amazing balm, smoothing over past injuries and age-old scars.
“When people get scared, they often do stupid things.” He turned to Thomas again. “Sometimes people do something really silly like run away.”
Thomas straightened and took a deep breath that had his little chest puffing out with bravery. “I won’t run away.”
Colton clapped him on the shoulder. “Good for you, buddy. You’re tougher than I am.”
14
It was almost absurdly easy to work alongside Colton.
What once might have been nerve wra
cking was now…well, maybe not easy, but enjoyable. Her heart still raced way too fast, but it wasn’t with nerves, but with excitement. Anticipation.
Happiness.
She grinned over at him as he scowled down at the cutout in his hand. She wasn’t sure what exactly he’d been trying to make, but whatever it was, it hadn’t come out to his liking. He sat across from her at the arts and crafts table, looking at home even though his knees were up to his chest as he perched on the too-small seat.
He glanced up and met her gaze, his scowl morphing into a grin that took her breath away.
“What do you think, Ms. Mack?” Colton held up his mangled piece of construction paper and she had to press her lips together to keep from laughing out loud.
The kids were waiting for her to respond so she forced a look of pure innocence. “That was an excellent attempt at a…”
“A sun,” he provided, pointing toward the collage the little girl next to him was working on. All the kids were making posters and decorations to hang on the walls of Lily’s hospital room for her upcoming birthday party.
“Of course, a sun,” she said, laughter making her voice shake. “Well done.”
He shrugged, adopting that cocky air she knew so well…and which she now knew was a total front. Most of the time he just pretended to be egotistical for the sake of a laugh. Other times…well, she didn’t think he lacked in the self-confidence department.
Her heart squeezed as she remembered what he’d said to Thomas earlier. He might be confident, but he had his insecurities just like everyone else, and the fact that he’d owned up to it…
Was it weird that she found that so attractive?
Maybe. But there it was. She wasn’t sure she’d ever seen any guy so vulnerable, let alone an alpha hottie like Colton. It was beyond attractive, it was endearing. It hinted at a depth in him that she’d caught glimpses of during their night together.
Their…date? Could she call it a date? Oh man, she was in trouble. They hadn’t even had a proper date—how could she possibly be feeling so much for him already?
A sudden onset of nerves had her palms growing damp. She wiped them on her jeans and turned her focus to the new boy beside her. He was shy, likely because he was new to the hospital, and that made her want to take him under her wing.
When a nurse arrived to herd the kids back to their rooms, they were left alone so suddenly she forgot to be nervous. He stared at her across the table, and she wondered if he was waiting for her to speak.
If he was, he’d be waiting quite a while. She had no idea what to say.
“Do you think maybe we should get out of here?” he asked, his voice low, smooth, and gravelly. So sexy, and so…at odds with his current position.
“I don’t know,” she said slowly as if truly debating. She eyed him in that tiny chair. “You seem so comfortable, I hate to make you move.”
His lips twitched with amusement. “Honestly, I’m not sure I can move. I’m pretty sure I’ve lost circulation in my lower extremities.”
She laughed as she came to a stand, offering him her hand to help him stand.
He took it and…it was a mistake. Mistake! She should never have touched him if she wanted any hope of maintaining a coherent conversation.
And they did need to talk, that much was obvious.
He seemed to be reading her mind because he let her hand go after he stood, although his touch still lingered long after he released her. Shoving his hands into his pockets, he tilted his head toward the door. “Shall we?”
She nodded, leading the way out. “Do you want—”
“Would you be free—”
They started to speak and then stopped at the same time. Colton gave her a sheepish grin as he held the door for her. “After you.”
She drew in a deep breath. “I was going to see if you wanted to grab a coffee.” Biting the inside of her lip, she marveled at what she’d just done.
She’d asked him out. Her. Addison Reginald had asked out Colton Parker. Pride far outweighed the anxiety that came with uncertainty.
“I’d love that,” he said.
They agreed to meet at Java Lava’s since they’d driven in separate cars and Addison spent the entire drive trying to figure out what to say and rehashing everything he’d already said back at the hospital.
It wasn’t an apology, but it was close. Actually, it was better because she could relate. Hadn’t her first response to any new experience been to run away?
The fact that she’d not only not run but had been the one to instigate that kiss…she sat up straighter behind the wheel, supremely smug by the progress she’d made since venturing out on her own to this new town.
It was that newfound pride that had her walking into the coffee shop with her head held high and her shoulders back, more glad than ever that she’d invested in some new clothes. She didn’t necessarily believe that the clothing made the man—or woman—but they certainly didn’t hurt.
Not to mention, she rather enjoyed the way Colton’s gaze moved over her as she walked to the table he’d claimed. As she sat, he passed her a cup of coffee. “I hope you don’t mind that I ordered for you. Gina said this was what you drank.”
She blinked in surprise as she sank into the seat across from him. “It is, thanks. But…how did you get here so quickly?” She narrowed her eyes. “Deputy Parker, you didn’t go over the speed limit did you?”
His eyes glimmered with mischief. “Break the law? Me?” He scoffed. “Never.”
“Uh huh.”
He puffed his chest out. “Lady, I am the law.”
She laughed as she rolled her eyes. “Oh brother. Whoever thought it would be a good idea to give you a badge?”
He leaned over as if letting her in on a secret. “You know, I’m still trying to figure that out.”
She pretended to study him. “The bad boy lawman, huh? That’s not something you see every day.”
He shrugged. “Yeah well. I don’t love following the rules, but I’ve learned the hard way what breaking the law will do.”
She arched her brows, a silent question.
He nodded toward his sister. “Our dad was in and out of prison most of our lives.”
“Oh, I’m so sorry,” she said.
He shrugged again, as if it were no big deal. “Yeah, well… He taught us both a lesson, I guess.”
Her heart went out to him, but she wasn’t sure what to say…what to do. The number of people who had opened up to her in the past could be counted on with one hand. She reached over and placed a hand over his. “I’d say you turned out pretty great. You must make your mom proud.”
He smiled, and it was more genuine than his usual cocky grin. “Thanks,” he said. “I think I do…” He shifted. “Most of the time.” He gave a funny little grimace. “At least, I hope I do.”
She held her breath as she waited for him to ask about her family, but when he switched the topic to the kids at the hospital she breathed out in relief. The conversation was surprisingly easy as they talked first about her volunteer work, and then about her own experience in hospitals as a kid.
She found herself telling him things she’d never told anyone before—not even Vanessa. All about those scary times in the hospital, and then the often scarier times when she’d try to go back to school and fit in after being gone for an extended period of time. She even told him about her mother’s desertion and their slow but steady attempts to regain some sort of relationship these past few years.
For a guy who always had a quick comeback, he was a surprisingly good listener.
But there was one topic they both avoided as if by some silent agreement. That kiss seemed to hover between them. At least, for her it did. She wanted to address it, but she wasn’t sure how. She couldn’t bring herself to apologize for it, and most of her hurt and anger had faded in the face of his pseudo-apology earlier today.
They’d both finished their coffees and most of the tables around them had cleared out by th
e time a silence fell between them.
Colton shifted, his easy confidence replaced by a nervous energy she felt as well. “Addie, what I said earlier…”
He cleared his throat and she resisted the urge to do the same. She fidgeted with her cup instead, wishing desperately that she had some coffee left because she was suddenly parched.
His gaze lifted and clashed with hers. “We should talk. There’s something I need to say.”
She nodded. “I know. I know we need to talk.” For a woman who never wanted to speak, she was suddenly quite the talker. “That kiss was—”
“Perfect.”
Her eyes widened at the intensity in his voice. Perfect. Yes. Yes, it was. She’d been about to say ‘rash’ because as much as she didn’t regret kissing him, she was realizing now how little she really knew him. More importantly, how little he knew about her.
This conversation they’d just had proved that.
“We’re moving too quickly,” she said, ducking her head as heat crept up her neck. “I moved too quickly.”
His finger under her chin gently nudged her head back up so she was facing him again. “You didn’t move too fast,” he said, his voice low and solemn. “I felt it too. I wanted to kiss you more than you can ever know.”
She forced herself to meet his gaze unflinchingly even though her cheeks still flamed. “But you didn’t.”
He let out a long exhale as he dropped his hand back to the table. “Only because I knew I shouldn’t…not until you knew some things about me.”
She pressed her lips together as she considered that. “What things?”
He opened his mouth, his eyes so serious, so intense…she felt a rush of nerves break out in her belly.
Then he seemed to reconsider what he’d been about to say because his mouth clamped shut again. He licked his lips and took a deep breath. “I just think we should get to know one another better. I need you to know the real me, just like I’d like to know the real you.” He winced. “Does that make sense?”
She watched him thrust his hands into his hair, rocking back in his seat a bit before leaning forward again. She didn’t think she’d ever seen him so off-kilter or so…nervous. But she couldn’t bring herself to reassure him or even ask what he was so afraid of because his words had brought with them a tidal wave of guilt.
Fake Dating the Unsuspecting Heiress Page 12