by Bella Andre
"There's nothing I want more than for this to work again, for us to be together again, forever this time. But our physical connection has always been an important part of our love. If you want to go without, I will, but..." He ran his hand up her thigh and pressed his hips to hers. "It'll be torture."
"Of course I don't want to do that!" She bit her lip, and he was hard-pressed not to kiss the now-damp flesh. "I just want to be able to think straight."
He kissed her before saying, "Okay. Think straight."
She playfully pushed him away and he laughed. "You're impossible, and I love it, but..." She managed a serious tone. "I want you to know that I'm going to work on telling you how I feel right when I feel it, instead of bottling it up for so long that it eats me up inside."
"And I want you to know that I'm not going to put work--or anything else--ahead of you."
"What else do you need from me?" she asked him.
"You're perfect just the way you are."
"That's sweet and romantic, but I want real. We're good in bed together. We know that. You make my heart and my mind spin like crazy. But we obviously stink at communicating outside the bedroom. I could have supported your career better. I could have attended more of the social functions with you in New York City instead of begging off because of my own discomfort. I could have met you for lunch and taken the scary subway. And I will do that this time. Well, there's no subway here, but if we return to the city..."
He couldn't resist kissing her again. She was really giving them another chance, and he felt like he was the luckiest man on the planet.
"I missed you on those evenings. But I wanted you to be happy, and I knew you were never happy at those functions." He remembered sitting with his colleagues over dinner, each with their wife or significant other, while he was alone. He'd known then things weren't ideal, but he'd been so wrapped up in getting through each day and proving himself that he'd never slowed down enough to figure out what to do about it. And then it was too late.
"I wish you would have told me then that you missed me, that you needed me there no matter what. If you had, maybe I would have pushed myself harder. I don't know for sure what might have happened had things been different. All I know is that we've got a second chance at a future. And I want us to give it everything we have this time, without letting all of our fears and pride catch us in their grip."
Trent felt like all of his dreams just might come true after all. At least, if he didn't completely screw things up again. Which meant he needed to have the courage to actually communicate with her by asking, "Are you sure you want this? Are you sure you want me? I am one hundred percent in this relationship, but if any part of you isn't, I need you to tell me."
"See?" She was beaming at him as if he'd just said the most wonderful thing in the world. "We're already communicating so much better. We're bridging the gap that we thought our physical love would fill ten years ago." She pressed her lips to his, then said, "Yes, I want this. Yes, I want you. I have never stopped loving you. I'm just scared that as things come up, I'll clam up and you won't notice. Or that I'll stop supporting your work and you'll forget that our relationship needs attention." She reached for his hand and threaded her fingers through his. "It's hard for me to admit this to you, but I'm scared, Trent. Scared to open myself up to you again and end up even more hurt than before."
"I know, sweetheart." He pulled her in close. "I'm scared, too."
"You're never scared."
"That's not true. I just never used to let anyone know I was scared. But I've never been more afraid of anything than I am of losing the only woman I've ever loved for a second time. I'm scared that coming back to the island sends the wrong message to my grandfather or that I've somehow let down my father. I'm scared that even after all these changes, and the ones I'm going to make in the future, I'll still mess things up with us. I've had ten years to try to figure out what makes my life complete, and what I know for sure is that you're the only person, the only thing in this crazy world that makes me feel whole. And the only thing that can truly make me happy is loving you the way you deserve to be loved, every second of every day for the rest of my life."
"Oh, Trent..."
He lowered his lips to hers with a tender kiss, one she returned just as sweetly, before asking, "When do you think we should tell our families that we're trying to make things work again?"
"Actually, I'm going to have breakfast with my parents tomorrow morning, because I don't want them to hear about us from someone else before they hear it from me. If everything does end up working out between us, I'll want you to come with me. But for now I think I should talk to them myself first."
He tried not to clench up at the way she'd said, If everything does end up working out between us. She'd been nothing but honest about needing to build a new foundation beneath them, step by step, one piece at a time. And she was right...even if all he wanted was to get down on one knee right this very second and ask her to be his again forever.
Still, he wanted her to know, "If you end up deciding you'd like me to be there, my day is pretty open. Just call or text, and I'll swing by to say hello to them."
"You have no plans? No resort business to make yourself crazy over? No legal work to bury yourself in?" Disbelief was evident in her tone. "Even I've got tons to take care of between the mural and my gallery."
"Tomorrow's Sunday, and since I've been back on the island, I usually meet up with whatever family members are free to have lunch. I've also been going over to Shelley's cafe to help out with getting it ready for her grand opening in two weeks. I'd like to tell my family we're dating again, if it's okay with you."
Thankfully, she didn't pause before saying, "Of course it's okay with me. And if you need me," she added with a smile, "just let me know."
"I always need you, Reese," he told her as he curled his body around hers the way he always used to. "Always."
Chapter Nineteen
REESE FELT TRENT'S arms tighten around her waist the following morning and smiled. It felt so right to share a bed with Trent again, and their talk last night had done wonders for her nerves. She even felt a little guilty having so much on her plate today when Trent's day was wide open. Wasn't that a shocking change?
She rolled over in his arms, and he kissed her forehead. "Good morning, beautiful. Are you freaking out, or are we okay this morning?"
His hair was tousled from going to bed with it wet from their shower, and he had a light peppering of scruff along his jaw, but it wasn't just his looks that continually tugged at her heart. It was all of him, and the fact that the first thing he wondered about was her state of mind made her even happier.
"I'm so happy you stayed." But she also knew she needed to be completely honest and admit, "And I'm also freaking out a little."
"Only a little?"
She gave him a small smile. "Okay, I might be freaking out a lot, actually. But I'm starting to realize that doesn't mean I have to run from what I'm feeling. It just means there's a lot on the line with us...and I don't want anything to go wrong."
"It won't, Reese. Because we are going to build that great foundation that we need this time."
He sounded so confident, but after their talk last night, she now knew that freaking out didn't necessarily just go one way. She hadn't been the only one scared in New York City; Trent had been scared, too. Not only had she never told him how terrified she was, but she had never thought to ask him if he felt the same way.
"What about you?" she asked him now. "Any second thoughts?"
"Only that I love waking up with you...and that I love you even more this morning than I did last night." He slipped his warm hands onto her waist beneath the hem of her T-shirt. "What time are you meeting your parents?"
"I don't need to leave until eight, so we have a little time." She eased her body over his. "Maybe if we make love now we won't tear each other's clothes off in some inappropriate place later."
"Inappropriate? Your stu
dio is hardly inappropriate."
"The car?" she reminded him, then silenced him with a kiss as she straddled his hips.
She could still hardly believe that Trent was here with her. Not just in her bed, but back in her life again. Every moment with him was so exciting, and at the same time, there was a lazy sensuality to every kiss, every caress, every whisper of need as they loved each other with the morning sun washing over them.
She gasped with pleasure as he sat up, then wrapped her legs around his waist to bring them even closer together. She buried her face in the crook of his neck and he groaned out her name as they moved together. Two lovers rediscovering the joys of waking up in each other's arms and greeting the day with the sweetest pleasure imaginable.
Sweeter than anything else she'd ever known...
*
AN HOUR AND a half later, nerves sizzled in Reese's stomach as she walked through her parents' front door. It had been more than a little nerve-racking to honestly communicate with Trent, but their talk last night and this morning had started to lift at least part of the heavy weight she'd been carrying on her shoulders. Now it was time to be just as up-front with her parents, too.
The house smelled like coffee, sausage, and eggs. It was a comforting, familiar smell that, with the exception of when she'd lived in New York, she'd enjoyed every Sunday of her life.
"Mom? Dad?" She followed the delicious aroma into the kitchen, where she found her mother working on a crossword puzzle.
"Hi." She kissed her cheek.
"Hi, sweetie. Let me get you some coffee." Her mother pushed to her feet.
"I've got it, Mom. Where's Dad?" she asked as she filled her mother's mug and her own.
"He was just called into the volunteer fire department for a last-second drill. They got the fire simulation machine in for the morning and wanted to run the whole crew through it again. You know how much he loves working with the fire crew, but he's really sorry to miss having breakfast with you." Her mother took the cup of coffee from Reese, then said, "Sarah called, and she sent a few new pictures of baby Oliver." Her mother reached for her tablet and swiped through the photos to show Reese, and she was glad for the extra few minutes to gather her thoughts.
"He's just gorgeous, isn't he?"
Reese looked at the pictures of her darling little nephew, her heart tugging as she remembered the sweet baby smell of his skin and how lovely it had been to hold him in her arms. "He's gotten so much bigger since I came back," she said, in awe of his gorgeously pudgy little cheeks.
She'd returned from her sister Sarah's house last week filled with resolve to finally move forward with her life. Reese was twenty-nine years old, and after spending a few weeks caring for little Oliver, she felt the tug of motherhood in the wings.
She wanted the children she hoped to have one day to enjoy the same loving family life that she always had. And now that Trent had moved back to the island, and after all the strides they'd started to make with each other, she suddenly wondered if they might have another shot at forever after all.
Which brought her right back to the news she needed to share with her mother.
She put the tablet on the table. "Mom? I have something I'd like to talk to you about."
When her mother immediately focused her full attention on Reese, just the way she always had when Reese needed to talk, the words she'd been planning to say tangled up on her tongue.
"I... Um..." This was harder than she'd imagined. Because for all that she felt so happy and hopeful whenever she was with Trent, as soon as she left his arms, her worries kept wanting to come flooding back.
"What is it, honey?" her mother asked. "You look a little flushed."
That would be the butterflies in my stomach. Telling her mother about Trent made it real. Maybe she should wait until they had proven to each other that they could make it work this time. But she didn't like the idea of hiding anything from her parents. Not when they'd always supported her no matter what and trusted her to make good decisions. She needed to show them the same trust. Besides, hiding her feelings hadn't worked with Trent all those years ago, had it? Clearly, it was a habit she needed to break.
"Trent and I are...well, we're sort of dating again." When her mother didn't respond right away and Reese couldn't quite read her expression, she asked, "Do you think I'm crazy for seeing him again?"
"I've always liked Trent, and there was no doubt about how much he adored you." Her mother pressed her lips together, as if she were weighing the rest of her answer. "But the important thing, Reese, is how you feel. When you came back from visiting Sarah, you were ready to move on and think about starting a family and finding a man who would be your forever love. Is Trent your forever love?"
"Once upon a time, I was certain he was. And then when everything fell apart, I tried to convince myself he wasn't. But now?" She shook her head. "Is it crazy if I hope he does end up being my forever love?"
"If you ask me, crazy would be letting love slip through your fingers a second time." Her mother put her hand over Reese's. "You never stopped loving him, did you?"
"Never," Reese whispered. "I feel so much for him that at times it's hard to remember why we broke up. But I'm scared. I don't want to get hurt again. And I don't want to hurt him."
"Of course you're scared, and he probably is, too. Honestly, I'd be surprised if you both weren't. Risking everything for love is always brave. But risking everything for love a second time? If you ask me, that's the bravest thing of all."
"Thank you, Mom." She put her arms around her mom and hugged her close. "For always understanding. For not ever judging. And for listening and being here whenever I've needed you. Even though Trent and I are still trying to work things out and nothing is totally certain yet about our future, I didn't want you and Dad to find out that we were dating again from someone else first. Especially since I can't seem to be able to stop myself from kissing him, even if we're in public."
"I feel just the same way about your father," her mother said, "even after all these years. But while lust is easy, lasting love--the kind that carries you through illness and hard times and pulls you through to the other side even stronger than you were before--that takes work."
Reese could hardly believe her conservative mother had used the word lust.
"Now, honey. Don't look at me like I just dropped the F-bomb. I'm a woman. I know all about lust."
"I'm not sure I want to talk about this with you." Reese was only half teasing. "I like thinking about you as my proper mother who doesn't think about that."
"Well, that would make me rather boring, wouldn't it?" Her mother smiled.
"Not that I don't appreciate you being willing to share your thoughts on...that...but there is something else I wanted to ask you about. You and Dad have a perfect marriage. You're always together, and he's always put our family ahead of work and everything else in his life. How did you get to that point?"
"We do have a rather ideal marriage, but it's still a give-and-take. Trust me, we've had our moments. It wasn't always easy for your father to put us first. He missed out on a few promotions, but family was always important to him. To both of us." She paused before admitting, "I might have enjoyed a little more zest and spontaneity. A few unscheduled dinners and impromptu date nights. Marriages should have a little wiggle room, not be so structured. Enjoy the moments as they come."
"Wiggle room," Reese repeated, chewing on the thought.
"For my generation, dinner on the table and reading the newspaper together was what we were brought up with. But your generation is different. More lively. Dinners out are more commonplace. So is getting together with friends, going on outings and changing your destination midway. Those are all wonderful things. I can count on one hand the number of times we've done that. We've lived our lives on trolley car tracks and it's mostly been wonderful. But for you? I think you should allow wiggle room. And not just on the day-to-day things. Because no matter how much you want to get things perfect th
is second time around, you're probably not always going to get things exactly right. A little wiggle room to make mistakes and then fix them would probably help take the pressure off of both of you."
"Thank you, Mom. For everything."
As Reese left and headed for the resort where she was planning to work on the mural for a few hours today, she found herself continuing to think about what her mother had said. Everything Reese and Trent had done together as a couple was spontaneous--except when it came to their marriage. Had she expected too much, too regimented of a life together, with set expectations of when he'd arrive home from work and how their life would play out? And wasn't her mother right that now she was so scared of things going wrong again that she was expecting perfection out of both her and Trent?
Wiggle room. Definitely something worth considering.
Chapter Twenty
TRENT SAT AT a table at the Hideaway with Derek, who had just spent the last ten minutes griping about trying to run his masonry and building business in Boston from the island. When his brother pushed his sleeves up, Trent noticed a bandage by his elbow.
"What did you do this time?" Derek was an adrenaline junkie. The bigger the risk, the more gratifying the thrill. Cuts and bruises came with the territory.
"I had a run-in with a rock when I was hang gliding. But it was nothing. Only seven stitches."
"Did you have Didi stitch it up?" Trent cocked a brow. "She's a hell of a lot better with a needle than the doctor at the local clinic," Derek replied, before saying, "So...you and Reese? You're a thing again?"
Trent had been planning to tell his brother--and the rest of his family--today. But he had a guess who had already planted the seed in his brother's head.
"I take it Sierra mentioned our conversation?" The one where he'd told his sister he wanted Reese back more than he wanted anything else in the entire world.
"Who else?"
Trent laughed, knowing that the only reason his sister had talked to Derek about Trent and Reese was because she was full of hope that the two of them could make things work the second time around. In fact, Sierra was fairly bursting with that hope.
She'd so loved having Reese as a sister-in-law. Clearly, she was ready for them to be sisters again. One day, when his sister finally fell in love, he sure hoped it went smoother for her than it had for him or Quinn. And the guy she fell for better treat her like a princess, or Trent and his brothers would tear the guy apart with their bare hands.