by Lane Hart
“Got that, Tal?” Dad asks.
“Yeah, I’ve got it.”
“I’ll go ahead and order a final scan. Assuming it shows improvement with the brain swelling, I’ll get your release papers ready. But you will need to schedule an appointment with a neurologist back home first thing Monday morning.”
“We will,” my Mom assures him. “Thank you, Dr. Granberg.”
He gives her a smile and a nod. “Take care.”
“What about training?” my dad blurts out before he can leave.
“I would suggest that Sage avoid any and all types of physical exertion for at least the next few days, until he’s able to see a neurologist. There was some brain swelling and bleeding on his scans. The last thing we want is to exacerbate that.”
“Of course,” Dad replies. “Thank you.”
When the doctor leaves, Tal says, “Well, it looks like you’re finally going to get a vacation.”
“That’s fine,” I agree since I don’t exactly feel like getting in the cage or even lifting weights at the moment.
“You must feel bad,” Tal chuckles. “I don’t think you’ve missed a day working out since middle school, not even when you had an allergic reaction to those bee stings that made your face swell up twice its size.”
“I’m allergic to bees?” I ask in surprise.
“We didn’t know that either until about two years ago when you were mowing the grass and hit a yellow jacket nest,” Mom explains.
“Probably because he never went outside except to go to the gym.”
“I go outside to run,” I point out. “And to go to school.”
“Not anymore, genius,” Tal grumbles while rubbing his eyes with his fingers. “We graduated from high school eight years ago. I went to college. You didn’t.”
“Good. I don’t want to go to college,” I say with a shrug.
“Well, you didn’t. Even though you should have,” Tal says.
“Tal, leave your brother alone,” our Dad instructs. “I’ll go make sure they have all the insurance documents they need and see if we can get a neurologist referral.”
“I’ll go with you,” Mom says, leaving me and my brother alone in the room.
“Guess I should get dressed. Could you hand me my clothes…what was your name again?” I ask while pointing to the wardrobe.
Tal’s face goes slack and his color fades.
“I’m joking, jackass! Like I could forget the guy who looks just like me.”
“No, you look just like me,” he argues as he finally gets into motion, pulling my bag of clothes out and dumping them on the bed. “Well, this could be awkward. All you have are your spandex shorts. No socks, no shoes, and no shirt.”
“Shit.”
“I’ll go grab some clothes from your bag in the car,” he says.
“Thanks, man,” I tell him. “And if you see Eden, ask if I can ride home with her.”
“You sure about that?” he says before he walks out the door. “Could be an awkward four-hour drive if you suddenly get your memories back.”
“I’m sure,” I tell him. There’s no one I would rather spend every free minute with than Eden.
Chapter Eight
Eden
“I can’t wait to get home and sleep in my bed tonight,” Sage says. “I wish my parents would let you stay over.”
My fingers tighten on the steering wheel as I focus on the highway in front of me.
Slow and gradual is what his parents said about helping him get his memory back.
“Ah, Sage, you haven’t lived with your parents in years.”
“I haven’t?” he asks, genuinely surprised. “Then…ah, where do I live?”
“You have a house that you share with Tal,” I explain. “I bet that once you’re in your room with your things, you’ll start to remember more.”
“Yeah, hopefully,” he says. “There’s like this gigantic black hole in my head. When I even try to think about what’s inside of it, my head starts throbbing.”
“Then don’t do that!” I tell him. “The doctor said not to try and force things. Take it one day at a time and let the memories come back on their own.”
“Yeah, okay,” Sage agrees. “So, since I don’t live at home with my parents, does that mean you can stay over tonight?”
“Ah, let’s see what Tal thinks first,” I hedge, because it’s Tal’s house too. I don’t want to do anything he’ll be mad about. And since my heart is on the brink of getting too caught up in this memory-challenged Sage, it’s best to let someone else make those decisions for me.
“Why would Tal care?” Sage asks.
“He lives with you,” I say simply rather than try to explain that Tal and I have been hooking up for years. I don’t think Sage needs to know about that right now. He’ll think I betrayed him, when I didn’t.
“Tal won’t care. I bet he has girls over all the time,” he remarks.
“He doesn’t,” I blurt out before thinking. “I mean, he doesn’t have many girls over. He’s…picky.”
“Huh. Tal’s picky?”
“Yep.”
“Guess that explains why he didn’t want to go to prom. But, ah, prom was a long time ago, right?”
“Right.”
“You and I went together?” he asks. “Twice, junior and senior year.”
I nod and swallow around the knot in my throat caused by all those old feelings bubbling up from my chest.
“The night of junior prom was our first time,” Sage states.
“Yes, it was.”
“I was so nervous. But then afterward, it felt so right and easy all the other times.”
“It did,” I agree as I blink away the tears clouding my vision since I’m busy driving. Now is not the time to think about all those sweet times we were together. Times when I thought Sage loved me as much as I loved him and that he always would.
“We went to the beach in August,” Sage says excitedly. “That was after graduation, and I just remembered it!”
“Good, that’s good,” I tell him with a forced smile in his direction. His gaze is fixed straight ahead, but I can tell he’s not seeing the cars in front of us but the past.
“It was just you and me staying in an oceanfront hotel room. Our parents finally caved and let us go on our own since you were getting ready to go off to college. It was the best week of my life…”
“Mine too,” I agree with a genuine smile when I recall those lazy mornings, sleeping in late, wrapped up in Sage’s arms with the balcony door open to let the ocean breeze in. It felt like we were the only two people in the world. I thought…well, I thought it was so perfect and romantic that he was going to ask me to marry him. But he didn’t. Instead, when we came home, Sage broke up with me.
“Shit!” Sage shouts suddenly, and I cringe, thinking he’s remembered that part too. Instead, he says, “That’s all I can remember.”
“You’re making progress. That’s what’s important,” I assure him.
“Yeah, I guess so,” he says, and from the corner of my eye I see him reach up to rub his fingers at his temple before closing his eyes. “Fuck, I’m tired.”
“Take a nap. The doctor’s release paperwork said we don’t need to wake you every hour. I’ll let you know when we’re home.”
“Thanks, baby,” Sage says as he rests his head against the window.
Sage
“Does any of this look familiar?” Tal asks as he shows me around what is apparently our house.
“How long have we lived here?” I ask as I take in the living room furniture and electronics, the kitchen with all of the top-of-the-line stainless steel appliances. It could be anyone’s house, as far as I can tell, but apparently, it’s mine.
“About four years,” my twin answers.
“It’s okay if you don’t remember,” Mom says. “Maybe you should try your bedroom.” She steers me by my shoulders in that direction. “Your furniture from home and all your trophies from even high scho
ol are in there.”
“Okay,” I agree as I step into the dark room and flip on the light.
There are long, heavy, gray curtains that keep out the sunlight, a plain green and gray comforter, a few clothes on the floor – mostly athletic shorts, and then a case full of trophies. “Those I remember,” I tell her as I go over and read some of the dates on the inscriptions. The biggest ones are recent and unfamiliar, but most are ones I got in middle and high school wrestling tournaments. Dad made Tal and I focus on our ground game even back then because he knew we would be naturals like him at sparring.
I then go over to open the closet door and flip on the light. It’s only half full of clothes, but there is a ton of exercise equipment on the floor – heavy dumbbells, jump ropes, boxing gloves, a medicine ball, and there’s a pullup bar attached to the inside of the closet door. Looking at all that shit just makes me dog ass tired.
“I’m gonna take a shower and get cleaned up,” I tell my mom so that she’ll give me some privacy.
“Of course. I’ll be right outside if you need anything,” she says.
“I’m fine, really, other than missing a few memories. You all can stop babying me.”
“It may seem like it’s not much to you, but brain injuries are dangerous, Sage,” she says. “You have to be careful.”
“I will be. All I’m going to do for the next few days is rest.”
“Good. You’ve earned it,” she says with a small smile before she finally leaves.
It takes searching through several drawers in the dresser before I find where I keep my boxer briefs and a pair of pajama pants since I have company in the living room. My fingers hit something small and hard on the far side of the pajama drawer. It’s a velvet box. I pull it out to get a better look and realize it’s a jewelry box. Popping it open, I find a sparkling diamond solitaire inside. It’s not huge, but it’s beautiful and clear, nearly perfect.
Was I planning to propose to Eden? I don’t remember any of that, but I do recall shopping for a ring, spending hours in the store with the jeweler who explained all about the different cuts and shit, looking through tons of loose diamonds to find the one I thought Eden would love. I didn’t have a ton of money saved to spend, but I didn’t think she would want some huge, massive rock on her delicate hand…
That seemed like so long ago. I couldn’t wait to ask her, so did I propose, and Eden said no? Fuck. That sucks to even think. I close the ring box and slide it back under my pajama bottoms in the drawer until more memories come back to me. I don’t think I could handle asking Eden and hearing that she turned me down.
The shower is at least familiar, and the warm spray of the water feels good. I close my eyes and lather up my hair with the same boring shampoo I’ve always used, so the scent has me feeling more alert. The same goes for the body wash.
Once I’m finished, I dry off, running my fingers through my damp hair and putting on my bottoms before returning to the living room. I take my time because I’m hoping my parents will be ready to leave after the long drive back to town. All I want to do is sack out on the sofa with Eden and watch some action movies. And eat. I’m hungry as a motherfucker because the hospital food was disgusting.
“You feel okay after your shower?” Dad asks as if I’m an invalid.
“Yes, Dad. Like I told Mom, I’m fine. You both can go home. You look exhausted,” I say on my way to the kitchen. I open and close most of the cabinets before finally hitting the jackpot in the pantry. Grabbing a bag of potato chips, I snag a soda from the fridge and take them both to the enormous sectional.
When I sink into the leather cushions, I tell Tal, “Sofa is comfy.”
“Yeah. You picked it out,” he informs me from where he’s barely sitting on the far arm. Eden’s standing beside him while my parents sit side by side on the love seat, all of them watching me as I pull open the bag of chips and dig in.
“What?” I ask between bites.
“You don’t usually eat junk food,” Tal says.
“When I’m training?”
“No, like ever,” he says. He nods to the bottle of soda between my legs and chips. “Those are mine.”
“Am I supposed to ask your permission before eating them?” I snap at him.
“No. I just can’t believe you would put that ‘poison’ in your perfect body.”
“I’m on vacation! It’s not like I’ll be fighting for a while if the doc won’t even let me train.”
“Right. You deserve a break,” Mom says. “There will be plenty of time for you to get back into things once you’re healed.”
“You said I had a title fight?” I ask around the crunching.
“That’s right. Welterweight championship title,” Dad replies.
“Cyrus was disqualified for his dirty knee to your head when you were down,” Tal mutters.
“He was disqualified, so I won, right?”
“Ah, well, sort of,” Dad says. “It’s only a matter of time before someone else will challenge you for it since it wasn’t won by a knockout, tap out, or decision.”
“Okay,” I reply.
I refrain from telling him that I may not defend it. Fighting is Linc Abrams’ entire life, always has been and always will be. But really, what’s the point of getting back in the cage? I’ve been working my ass off training and fighting for that one achievement. Now seems like as good a time as any to do something else. Anything else since my head has already taken a major hit. I’m not stupid. Even I know that if I keep getting concussions, the damage to my brain will be worse until I could end up paralyzed or psychotic. I don’t want to be either.
“Dad, take Mom home so you two can get some rest,” I tell them. “Tal and Eden will be here with me, so you don’t have to stick around.”
“If you’re sure,” Dad says.
“I’m absolutely sure. I’ve been waiting my whole life to live on my own,” I say. I don’t want to hurt their feelings, but it feels like I’m finally an adult and free for the first time in my life, since I can’t remember the years before.
Mom comes over and kisses my cheek. “Call us if you need anything,” she says.
“Will do.”
“Take care of your brother,” Dad says to Tal as he gives my shoulder a squeeze on the way to the door.
“I’ll try,” Tal says as he gets up and follows them out.
“And you,” I say to Eden as I pat the empty cushion next to me with my palm. “Get your ass over here, baby. Let’s watch a little television before we crash.”
“Oh. Okay,” Eden agrees.
“You are staying, right?”
“If you want me to and if it’s okay with Tal.” She comes and sits down beside me, sitting upright and proper, which is weird.
“Potato chip?” I throw my arm around her shoulders to pull her closer and offer her the bag. She shakes her head no. “You sure? They’re your favorite.”
Her eyes flash to mine. “You remember that?”
“Of course, I do.”
The front door shuts, and then Tal returns to the living room, towering right above us. He looks pointedly at Eden, who suddenly jumps up, saying, “I’m going to the bathroom, I’ll be right back.”
“Okay,” I agree.
“I’ll make sure there’s toilet paper,” Tal says when he follows her back to my room.
I’m too tired to do it myself, so I’ll let him handle that shit.
Chapter Nine
Eden
“What the hell are you doing?” Tal asks me while shutting us together in Sage’s bathroom.
“Sage wants me to stay tonight,” I explain. “What am I supposed to do?”
“You could say no,” he mutters. When I don’t respond, he says, “But you don’t want to say no, do you? You want to stay here with him and sleep in his bed and pretend like you’re still together. That’s fucking insane, Eden! Sage got his brains scrambled, so he has an excuse. But what’s yours?”
“I-I don’t know,” I resp
ond. I have to lift my hair off my neck because I’m suddenly scorching hot and confused. My heart wants to stay with Sage and keep pretending even though my head knows that’s stupid. Trying to figure out a compromise, I blurt out, “Just let me stay tonight. One night. Nothing will happen, I promise.”
“You know I don’t give a shit if you fuck him,” Tal says, hands propped on his hips.
“I know that.”
“If it were fucking with no feelings involved, I’d tell you to ride ‘em, cowgirl,” he adds, making me fight back a smile. “But you and I both know that it’ll mean something to you and mean nothing to him once he gets his memories back.”
“And what if he doesn’t get them back?” I ask quietly.
“He will, Eden! It’s only a matter of time. At least I hope it’s soon, because I don’t want my brother to end up like Drew Barrymore in “50 First Dates”, waking up every fucking morning and not having a clue what happened the day before!”
“I know. I don’t want that either,” I tell him, throwing my arms around his slender waist to hug him because I know he’s worried sick. I’m surprised at just how lean Tal is under my hands. He feels like a skeleton.
“Have you been eating?” I ask him when I let him go.
“Of course I’ve been eating,” he scoffs.
“Then have you been drinking too much or smoking too much? You’re really thin, Tal.”
“Better than being fat, right?” he jokes as he avoids my gaze and looks in the mirror over the sink to runs his fingers through his dark hair.
“I’m worried about you,” I admit.
“I’m fine,” he says before he turns away, opening the door and walking out.
I shut the door and use the bathroom, then wash my hands before I return to the living room, needing a few minutes alone.
After all these years apart, I never dreamed that Sage and I would get back together. Well, maybe the first year when Tal insisted that his brother would regret his decision and beg me to come back. But eventually he stopped saying that and I realized that, to Sage, fighting would always be the most important thing in his life. I think I even knew it when we were together but was content even though I never came first.