by Yara Gharios
“We were already thinking about Logan’s offer to join his pack when he asked us to temporarily move in. That’s why we wanted you to make the decision,” Dad tells me.
This is surprising news, and I’m not the only one who thinks so. “What? Really? You were thinking about joining SMP?” Sadie interjects happily. When everybody looks at her in amusement, she retreats and adds, “Sorry.”
“It’s alright, Sadie,” Mom assures her. “You’re a very sweet girl. I’m glad you’re friends with Dylan.”
This nice lady is my mom, I think proudly, smiling.
“Yes, we were,” Dad answers Sadie’s question. “We were going to talk to Dylan about it, and reveal everything to Logan. We trust him, and we thought he would be able to help us protect you, Dyl. I suppose all that’s changed now, though. It’s up to you.”
This does change things. It explains why my parents didn’t say anything when I revealed my secret to the whole pack house, and why they were so willing to accept Logan’s offer to temporarily move to the pack house. I wish they didn’t leave it up to me though; I can’t really make a decision about this right now.
“Can I think about it?” I instead ask.
They both nod and say, “Of course.”
“Take all the time you need,” Dad adds.
“In the meantime, I really need to figure some things out,” I tell them. “I’ve lost myself so much in the last two weeks, and I’m just starting to find myself again.”
“I know something that might help,” Mason interjects, a smile on his face.
Daniel shoots him a suspicious look. The rest of us stare at him curiously, waiting for something to happen. The bastard that he is lets the tension build and messes with us with a long pause.
“Well?” I finally snap.
“Guess who’s coming home? Permanently?” he teases.
I frown. “Who?”
Mom gets it before I do, though, and she gasps. “Oh my God,” she whispers. “You did it?”
“Did what?” Nate asks.
“Yep,” he says smugly.
“Will somebody tell us what’s going on?” Connor asks impatiently.
Mason smiles at him. “Marianna’s coming home.”
Like a sudden burst of energy, I feel revitalized. Mason proposed! I rejoice. Hope finds its way into my closed-up heart, and brings it back to life.
“Aw man!” Daniel groans.
CHAPTER 9
Logan
After weeks of searching, I have nothing to show for my efforts. Everything I’ve been trying to figure out remains a mystery; the list and what it means, the families and what they’re hiding, the kidnappings, and now a murder. It’s all bearing down on me, and I’ve got nothing to make sense of any of them, no progress whatsoever.
Now that I also have Michael to think about and how it all connects to her, I’m doubly frustrated. It’s been a week since I found out her secret, and I’ve been dying to talk to her. But I promised myself to wait until my research leads somewhere first, and so far, I’ve just been hitting dead-end after dead-end.
It has to mean something. Every mystery must lead somewhere important. I’m sure of that, or else I would have stopped looking long ago. It’s also a little personal. Solving these mysteries was supposed to be my first official act as Alpha. I wanted to finish whatever it is that my father started, as some kind of way to prove to myself that I can live up to people’s expectations, being the only son of such a widely respected leader. I suppose it was foolish to think it would be as easy as I’d hoped.
Cade walks in on a hurricane in my office. Naturally, it takes him off guard, as he takes in the piles and piles of discarded papers. Then he sees the look on my face and understands.
“Don’t tell me,” he anticipates. “You got nothing?”
“Not a f*cking thing,” I groan. “There is absolutely nothing to go on anymore.”
I plop down in my chair with a heavy sigh, lean my elbows on my knees and put my head in between my hands. I’m this close to taking the phrase literally and pulling my own hair out. Cade looks like he wants to say something, but then changes his mind.
“What do you need me to do?” he asks. “I’m ready at a moment’s notice.”
I wave one of my hands around dismissively. “There’s nothing we can do at the moment but keep an eye on all the families and hope they either come to their senses and talk to us, or do something out of the ordinary that will give us a new lead.”
“Alright, I’m on it. You want me to start watching them right now?”
“Actually, I need you to stay with the Connollies. Make sure they’re okay and try to reassure them if their start voicing their worries. I know there’s not much to go on, and they probably won’t ask anyway, but if they do, at least let them know I’m looking into it.”
Cade nods easily and starts gathering up some of the discarded papers. “Got it. You want me to watch over Micheal, too?”
“Yeah, please,” I sigh. “I don’t know if she connected the dots yet, but I hope not. She doesn’t need to know until I have a concrete answer.”
He hands me the pile as he goes on. “What are you going to do in the meantime?”
I lay back against my chair and run a hand over my face. The only remaining issue, the one thing I could maybe do something about, is a thorn in my side that I can’t seem to get off. “I have to find Reena. I made some calls but so far it doesn’t look like she went anywhere I know of. Her phone is also off and there hasn’t been any credit card activity, according to our liaison at the police station. I need to send out a search party to try to find her. I think maybe she went looking for her birth mother. That’s the only other place I can think of that she might run to.”
Reena’s past before she was adopted had a profound effect on her. Her mother was a very beautiful but very vain woman. She tried to raise Reena to be in her image, but she was desperate for a father, so she got attached to the men that came and went in her mom’s life, and grew up thinking she wasn’t good enough for any of them to stick around for her. Finally, when Reena was 9, her mom had turned into a bitter and jealous person so she abandoned her at an orphanage. A few years later, Reena was adopted by my uncle Cliff. She was just starting to be happy when–
A hard knock at the door breaks me out of my thoughts. I shake myself back into focus.
“Come in,” I allow.
Jason walks in, or to be more accurate, stomps in angrily. “Why aren’t you doing anything about Michael?”
The question takes me by surprise, because I can only interpret it in one way and Jason is not supposed to know about the list and what’s been happening to the families.
“What are you talking about?” I ask.
“Why is he still here?” Jason demands. “After what he did to my sister, how can you let him keep living here?”
“It’s she and her,” Cade corrects, a little annoyed.
Jason simply waves his hand. “Whatever! Reena ran way because of that *sshole! Why haven’t you kicked him out yet?”
When it becomes clear what this is about, my reaction changes entirely. Whether he is my cousin or not, I am still his alpha. He is heavily mistaken if he thinks he can talk to me like that.
“Reena ran away because she was caught in a lie and felt guilty about it,” I remind him with a warning tone. “And it’s a lie that changes everything for our pack.”
“Michael lied,” he retorts. “What consequences is he facing?”
“She,” I emphasize, “is not in my pack, so it’s not in my authority to reprimand her. She and her family are guests under my protection.”
“A protection you can waive, given the fact that they lied.”
Being challenged, even by my cousin, is never an easy situation. An alpha has to be careful how he handles it, because he has to maintain control, but he also can’t risk losing the respect and compliance of his pack. However right now, I am more angry than anything else, and not just because
of the way he’s talking to me, but also because of what he’s saying.
“They lied to protect their daughter,” I declare commandingly. “It’s their right. As their host, I respect that.”
I take a few steps closer to him and lower my tone so that he knows just how serious I am.
“And as your alpha, I’m gonna need you to watch your tone. Especially when discussing matters that are none of your concern.”
Jason may glower and yell all he wants, but we both know his behavior is nothing but a tantrum, and I will not allow it. In the end, he backs down. Not just because he’s recognized his place, but also because the instinct to follow the order of one’s alpha always wins over.
Like a balloon, he huffs and deflates. “What about my sister? Is that not my concern, either? I have a right to know what you’re doing to find her.”
This, I can let slide, as long as his anger doesn’t get the better of him again and makes him act out of line. I tell him what I’ve done so far and what I plan to do next.
“I’m sending out your father with a search party,” I inform him coldly.
“That’s not enough,” he says. “A search party is too small. You need more people.”
He’s treading dangerous grounds, and I’m back to being annoyed. I stare at him, hard. “I am not sending more of our men and leaving the pack house vulnerable.” This is mainly to protect my pack, but I also don’t want the Connollies to be afraid for Michael’s safety.
“You don’t have to send someone from the pack,” he says. “What about our allies?”
My pack may be the largest in the country, but we do have friends who are part of other, smaller packs. In fact, I have an uncle and some distant relatives in three different ones. My second cousins Jimmy and Aiden are alpha and beta of their pack in New York, while their cousin Albert is part of the Washington pack. I’m also on friendly terms with a lot of other packs in neighboring states. We mostly keep in touch by phone, but every now and then, we will meet up in case one of us needs help. Usually, I reserve this kind of meet-up for emergencies only on my part.
Cade notices my hesitation and chimes in. “That might not be a bad idea.”
I debate this for a moment. I didn’t initially think this situation constituted as an emergency, but perhaps I should contact them. I don’t need to do more than explain to them what happened, then I’ll leave it up to them. If they are willing and able to help, that’s their choice.
“Alright,” I finally agree. “I’ll talk to Jimmy and Aiden first. Cade, get in touch with the New Hampshire packs first, then we’ll see if we need to contact anyone from further away.”
“What about the Redwoods?” he suggests. “They’re closer.”
I shake my head. “That’s the Connollies’ old pack. We can’t contact them without telling Steven, and I don’t want him to know just yet.”
Cade nods understandingly.
“Can I be the one to call uncle Colton?” Jason eagerly interjects.
Colton is my father’s oldest brother. We met him two years ago, at my dad’s funeral. He had moved out of the pack before I was born to start his own family.
“Alright, give him a call,” I agree.
Jason beams with excitement. This behavior isn’t new for him, and I understand why he’s so eager to reconnect with Colton. He and my uncle Cliff don’t always get along so well. Jason idolized our uncle Colton from the moment they shook hands and Colton told him he must be a strong wolf to have a handshake like that. Cliff and Colton also get along okay, though they hadn’t seen each other since Colton moved out. As for my relationship with him, I trust him enough to know he’d want to find his niece.
When Jason hops out of the room to get his phone, my frustration over the unsolved mysteries has been slightly diminished. Nevertheless, there is still a sense of worry in the pit of my stomach, partly for Reena but mostly for Michael. If Reena blabs to wrong people about Michael’s secret, I might be needing to call in that emergency meeting with all of my allies after all. I hope we find her in time and that this doesn’t happen.
CHAPTER 10
Michael
You know those cliché movies that start in someone’s bedroom just as their alarm goes off, and they wake up somehow looking fantastic and with a smile on their face? I really hate those movies. They’re very predictable. Why would anyone be happy about getting out of bed in the morning? I never understood that.
And yet, somehow, when I wake up Monday morning after having talked to my parents two days before, I’m calmer than I’ve been in what feels like a long time, and I can’t keep the smile off my face.
There are some positive things to consider. For one thing, my final exams start today and will be done on Wednesday. On Thursday, Marianna will be coming back for good. And Friday is when I’ll know for sure whether or not I’ll be attending the graduation ceremony held on Saturday.
Above all, making up with my family and my best friends was the best thing that’s happened to me in months. I’m nowhere near being satisfied and happy with my life, especially with the problem of he-who-shall-be-ignored still fresh and real. But I feel like myself again, only with a little more freedom.
The whole house knows I’m a girl, I remind myself.
For once, I consider what this could mean. What would it be like if I allow myself to get out of the room I’m currently occupying and actually go and walk around among them? I definitely wouldn’t have to worry about what I wear or how I sound, not even with what I say. No more censorship, at least not here. If one of them was going to do something to harm me, they would have done so by now. At this point, the worse they could do is kick me out, and that’s not even a bad thing. That would actually be the solution to my Logan dilemma.
Not that I’ve seen him, but I think he’s avoiding me. At the very least, he didn’t look for me once all week. He’s had enough time to process. Now, he’s just being as cowardly as I am.
But not anymore for me.
I’m done holing up anywhere. I’m going to be graduating soon, and I’ll be a legal adult in no time. It’s about damn time I stop feeling sorry for myself over a guy.
That’s why I’m smiling when I get out of bed Monday morning. I’ve decided the night before that I’m not going to run from anyone anymore. If the pack has anything they want to say, they can say it to my face. And if Logan comes anywhere near me, I will chew him out the way I have done thousands of times in my head.
Obviously, I still have to keep up the ‘guy’ façade at school, but it’s only for three more days. After that, I don’t have to see any of these people ever again, and I can finally be myself. Fortunately, in the meantime, I can walk down to the kitchen for breakfast with the rest of the pack, with my head held high. And that’s exactly what I do today.
If there’s anything I envy about those cliché movies, it’s the shift in the middle, when the transformation in looks and demeanor occurs, and the hero or heroine walks in a room full of people with an empowered look on their face. I haven’t had a transformation, and I don’t feel all that empowered, just determined. If anything, when I open the kitchen door, I feel nervous.
The chatter of conversation turns into silence when I walk in. There are about eighteen people gathered around the table on the right. Sadie and her family are all there, as are Cade and his. Aside from Jason, none of Reena’s family members can be found. Logan sits at the head of the table, with the seat next to him empty. My own family is also there, all sitting next to each other on one side of the large table.
They look at me with mixed feelings on their faces: pride and encouragement from those I went out and spent the whole weekend with, curiosity and anticipation from Sadie and Cade’s families, actual hate from Reena’s brother and a composed stare from Logan that stops me in place at the door as I stare back at him defiantly. If he has something to say, I give him the floor to do so. I’ll be glad to reply with as much indifference as he’s treated me since he found out I�
�m girl.
After practicing to do this all week, the pull is very easy to ignore now, especially with my negative feelings towards him churning inside of me and motivating me to fight this hold he has over me. I can’t erase it, but I can damn well pretend it’s not even real and hide just how much it’s still affecting me.
When he notices that my demeanor towards him is completely different than what he probably expected, he blinks with surprise. He’s the first to look away. That small victory is received with conflicting feelings. A small part of me, the pathetically in love with her mate part, scolds me for doing this and yearns to go near him. That part is the reason why I still haven’t shifted in front of him, because I know he will want me then. But the stronger part, the part that’s driving me to give him a taste of his own medicine, is pleased by his reaction, and smiles.
If I’m going to be completely honest with myself, I miss him more than I can express in words. I miss his kindness towards me. The little accidental touches that would be exchanged between us. I even miss our friendship and the simple act of talking to him.
I am very much aware that shifting in front of him will make him see the entire truth and possibly even change his feelings for me. But that’s just it; it would be because of the mating pull, not because he has any shred of affection toward me. I don’t like manipulating anyone’s feelings, and I wouldn’t want this kind of love anyway. If he wants me, he better man up and come tell me so himself without any influence. I deserve at least that.
“Dylan,” someone calls my name.
I snap out of my thoughts and stare at the shocking source sitting between Sadie and Daniel.
“Come sit with us,” Zoey tells me with a smile on her face. “You must be hungry.”
The ice queen has a heart? I think sarcastically.
Then I feel guilty about thinking that way of her when I know what sort of identity crisis she’s going through because of her biological father. Suddenly, I see her in a new and clear light. I’ve known about her situation for a while, but I still formed a negative opinion about her because I didn’t understand her. She’s not the closed up, immature little girl she seems to be on the outside, any more than I am the carefree and docile boy that I was pretending to be up until yesterday.