by Ruby Vincent
“It’s true,” she insisted. “Val, no one wants to do this. I don’t want this. But you were marked, I didn’t have a choice.”
“Everyone keeps saying that to me, but you do have a choice. You all had a choice, and you chose to turn on me and make my life hell. You were supposed to be my best friend, and you let them into my room.”
“I didn’t have a choice—”
“Stop saying that!”
Sofia pressed her lips together. We gazed at each other from opposite ends of the room. She was the first one to break.
Sofia walked over to the bed and perched herself on the edge. She patted the spot next to her, and the silence was tense as I decided what I was going to do.
“Val, please.”
Despite myself, my feet carried me over to the bed. I sat down. “Is this the part where you give me excuses?” I asked.
“Yes.” Her voice shook. “It is.”
I sighed. “Sofia, I don’t want to hear—”
“You need to hear this.” She shifted around to face me. “Val, you know better than anyone what happens when you’re marked, but you don’t know why.”
I didn’t reply, so she continued.
“A lot of us grew up in this world. We live in the town the Evergreens founded. Our parents and grandparents went to school here. We go to the junior prep school. We’ve all heard the stories, and by the time we get to the academy, we know to be afraid.”
“Afraid?”
She nodded. “The Knights were meant to keep the students in line, but some became problems. Problems that needed to be gotten rid of.”
“So to do that the school devolves into savages? That’s insane.”
“Marks didn’t start that way. At first, they were like eviction notices. You got one and you packed your bags and left. It’s when people refused to leave that things got... bad.”
My head was spinning. “I’m sorry. What? Why couldn’t they just be expelled like a normal school?”
“These aren’t things you could get expelled over, but still reasons enough that they’ll want you gone.”
I nodded slowly. “The Knights.”
“No.”
“No? What do you mean no?”
“The Knights don’t choose who gets marked any more than they choose themselves.” Sofia’s eyes were starting to clear. She was red-faced and shaky, but her tears had slowed. “That’s done by a person or people that no one knows. We only know that he/she/they calls themselves the Black Spades.”
“Excuse me?” I shook my head in disbelief. “Now I know you’re making all of this up. Sofia, that’s ridiculous. There isn’t some secret society running around beneath the nose of the entire school.”
She pinned me with a look that chilled. “There’s also no way four fifteen-year-old boys rule an academy and have even professors bowing at their feet. There’s no way an entire school would turn on their friend because of a playing card.”
I looked away. “Okay, you’ve made your point.”
A hand on my arm drew me back. “Evergreen is like nowhere else. This school churns out world leaders, kings, and king-makers, captains of industry. People would sell their second-born to get their firstborn in, and they do that because Evergreen is, without a doubt, the best, and everything from the professor and diets to the Knights and Spades makes sure we stay that way.”
“You’re being serious,” I whispered. “You really believe these Spades exist.”
“The Spades exist, Val. That’s not even a question. They chose the Knights, and then they chose you to be marked. Do you still have the card?”
I shook my head. “Why?”
“Because it’s their signature. One-of-a-kind cardstock, color-shifting ink, and the joker is dressed in the colors of the school. They can’t be replicated. That’s how you know it’s from them.”
“And no one knows who they are?” I asked, desperation lacing my voice. “Someone has to know. How can this be allowed to go on?”
“It’s been going on for decades, and that’s because no one knows who they are, or even how many.” She lowered her voice even though we were the only ones in the room. “Why do you think people are so afraid? They could be anywhere—anyone—watching you and ready to mark you if you make the wrong move.
“When people tried to ignore the marks, the Spades decided it was on the rest of the school to support the Knights and get them out by any means. It didn’t matter; they couldn’t be allowed to ruin our reputation.”
I lurched to my feet. “And people didn’t fight back? They didn’t say hell no to doing their dirty work. They didn’t think for a minute that bullying and harassment is wrong!”
“Of course, they did, Val. People fought back... and every single one of them regretted it.”
I sank back down. “What happened to them?”
“What didn’t happen? Deep secrets came out, family businesses were put under, futures were sabotaged, and, for one guy, a life was lost.”
In that moment, I knew. As I had the answer all along and was waiting for someone to tell me the question. “Walter McMillian.”
“Wal—” Sofia blinked. “Yes, how did you know?”
“Good guess. Are you telling me the Spades murdered him?”
“I don’t know the whole story. Just the bits my mom would tell me.”
“Your mom?” Goodness, it was like another world. I had stepped into a separate reality when I passed through the gates.
“She said it was like a scary story they liked to tell the freshmen. Walter McMillian: off-the-charts genius but boy from the wrong side of the tracks. Scholarship student and rebel.”
“He was marked?”
“He was friends with a person who was marked.” She gave me a sad smile. “And he was a much better friend than I was because he tried to protect them. The thing was people liked Walter. They liked his friend who got marked and they didn’t know why they were chosen in the first place. So when Walter decided all of this needed to stop and the Spades brought down, people began to listen. He wanted to root out the Spades, end their rule, and change Evergreen forever.”
“So he was killed,” I said through numb lips. “But how can people be sure it was the Spades who...” I trailed off at Sofia’s look.
“They murdered him, Val, and no one has questioned the rule of the Spades since. You were marked, you wouldn’t drop out, and rather than risk the same fate, we’ve all worked to drive you out.” Sniffling, her face crumpled. “And I’m so sorry. I don’t expect you to ever forgive me, but I want you to know it’s over for me—”
I shook my head. “No.”
“Val, I mean it. I’m on your side. I don’t care what happens to me.”
“No, Sofia.” The weight of this situation was settling heavy on me. I felt so many conflicting emotions I couldn’t keep track of them all, but one that stood out in sharp focus was relief. Now, I understood.
I understood why I lost my friends.
I understood why the school turned on me.
I understood how witnessing a fight in the woods had changed my life.
“You may not care what happens, Sof, but I do. I don’t want anyone to come after you the way they have me.”
Her tears were flowing freely now. “How can you do that? Be worried about me after everything I’ve done?”
My eyes slid off her face, growing unfocused as I gazed over her shoulder. “I know what it’s like to be scared, and the awful things it can make you do.” I looked back at her. “If this isn’t a horrible trick—”
She lunged forward and pulled me in for a hug as strangling as the first. “No. No way. I’ll never hurt you again. I missed you so much.”
“I... missed you too.” And then I was hugging her back. We held each other so tight I was sure we’d wake up with bruised ribs in the morning. I didn’t care. I needed Sofia. The pain of her betrayal had been another lash on my soul. It ate away at me until I was forced to numb myself to survive the pa
in. It all disappeared as we spent the night crying, laughing, and talking like we used to.
I didn’t know what the next semester was going to have in store for me, but I could face it with Sofia on my side.
Year one, final semester: bring it on.
Chapter Eleven
“We’ll have a limit for presents this year.”
“You can’t put a limit on presents.” The pan popped and sizzled as I flipped the bacon. The end of the semester had seen me with six As and two Bs. It was a bit strange having my grades posted for the entire class to see, but it did feel good to know I was holding my own among my classmates.
The end of the year also saw me on a bus home to Wakefield. I never thought I would miss our shoebox apartment with its puke-green walls, and single bathroom, but it was paradise compared to bodyguards, bullies, and secret societies.
I stood barefoot in the kitchen over the stove, cooking up breakfast while Adam babbled in his high chair and smeared avocado on his face. We were gearing up for a Christmas decorating marathon. Tree, lights, the whole works. If there was one thing the Moon women loved, it was Christmas, and we weren’t holding back for Adam’s first one.
“The whole point is giving and being generous,” I continued.
“Well, I don’t want you getting too generous, so we’ll have a fifty-dollar spending limit. Deal?”
I sighed. “Okay, deal.”
“Good.” Mom walked up to the sink and rescued a washcloth. She advanced on Adam. “Your first present comes today, it’s awesome, and I didn’t spend a dime.”
“Have you ruined the brag by saying it was free?”
“Nope.”
I laughed. Flicking off the stove, I got busy plating our breakfast. We were sitting down to eat when the doorbell rang. Olivia popped up with a grin. “Right on time. Wait here.”
I shrugged and speared a bit of egg. I overheard Mom opening the door. “Glad you’re here. Come in and make yourself at home.”
“Thank you.” The fork slipped from my fingers. “It’s so nice of you to let me stay.”
I got out of my seat and poked my head into the hall. No, I wasn’t dreaming. Sofia Richards was truly standing in my entranceway. She waved.
“Hi, Val. Surprise.”
Olivia was looking pretty pleased with herself. “Sofia called and said you two made up. She asked what our address was so she could send a present, and I told her to bring herself instead. Isn’t this great, baby?”
“Yeah, it is.” I meant it. Sofia and I patched things up, even though the rest of Evergreen didn’t know. The fact was that I needed my best friend. I had to trust her. I held out my hands and she rushed into my hug.
“Turns out you were right about my parents not wanting me for the holidays,” she said into my ear. “Madame Madeline is off to Spain to visit Dad, and they want alone time after being so long apart. I’d rather spend Christmas with you than in that empty house.”
I squeezed her tight. “I hope you’re still saying that after sleeping in a tiny room with me and an infant.”
She laughed and we went straight to my room to unpack her things.
It was the best Christmas in fifteen years’ worth of Christmases. The three of us stuffed our faces in front of the television watching Christmas movies. Mom took us to Santa’s village where we loaded up on eggnog and got dozens of pictures of a screaming Adam on Santa’s lap. On Christmas Day, we opened presents before having an impromptu dance party to the holiday radio station.
I was bordering on depressed when the sun dawned on January third. The new semester began today. Sofia had left the day before to get ready for school and now Mom was piling me in the car to drop me off to bodyguards, vicious classmates, and ruthless Knights.
As we got closer and closer to Evergreen, I got quieter.
It doesn’t matter what they throw at me, I can survive it. I’ve been through hell worse than anyone can imagine. Nothing will break me.
“Alright, kid.” Olivia pulled up to the gates and killed the engine. There was a long line of sport and luxury cars waiting to unload their own students. The air was filled with shouts and shrieks as friends met up with each other and parents said goodbye. “Have a good time. Call me if you need me.”
“I will.”
I kissed her cheek, told Adam I loved him, and climbed out of the car. I popped the trunk and reached in for my suitcase.
“Let me get that for you.” A hand shot past my vision and closed around my handle.
“Hey!”
Ryder heaved my case out and slammed the trunk. I barely had time to leap out of the way to avoid getting brained. “Ryder, give it back!”
I lunged for the case and he moved quickly. He twisted it out of my reach and caught me around the waist in one smooth move. I was crushed to his chest, nose buried in his blue lapel, as he put his mouth to my ear.
“Uh uh,” he whispered. “We wouldn’t want Mommy Dearest to think something is wrong.”
“Val?” On cue, Olivia spoke up. “Is everything okay?”
“What do we say?” Ryder hissed. His arm tightened.
I clenched my jaw. I hated him. I hated him with every fiber of my being, but Olivia was driving off, and I would be staying here... with him. It was better not to rile the psycho up even more.
“Everything’s cool, Olivia,” I called. “Ryder’s just helping me with my stuff.”
“Alright, love. I’m going to head out. See ya.”
“Bye.”
The car rumbled to life and Mom pulled away from the curb, leaving me with him.
At least there are witnesses.
The moment Olivia’s car disappeared down the hill; I smacked my hands on his chest and shoved. “Get off me, Ryder!”
Winter break had been good for Ryder. His hair was growing in. The inch of new growth didn’t yet match the look of his formerly long raven locks, but it still looked good on him. Everything looked good on him. From the large watch digging painfully in my side to the new silver stud in his ear. It was against the rules for boys to wear earrings, but he wasn’t letting that stop him.
His silver orbs gazed down at me, completely uncaring about my struggling. “You and I need to have a talk about the way things are going to go.”
“You need to let me go,” I shot back, “before you get smacked.”
He smirked. “Biting. Hitting. You’re barely a step above an animal.”
I was reeling my hand back to show him what I thought of that when he abruptly dropped me. “Calm down, Moon. We’re just talking.”
“I don’t have any interest”—I dove for my bag—“in talking to you!”
Ryder stepped to the side and I flew through the space he was standing in. “Shut up. Let’s go.” He took off, forcing me to run to keep up with him.
“You think you’re real smart,” he began, “getting a bodyguard to watch your ass.” Ryder passed through the gates of the school. His long legs strode over the cobblestone path, gliding through the crush of students. “But you don’t think that’s going to stop us. You’re marked, Moon. That’s never going away.”
“I didn’t ask them to assign me a bodyguard. I didn’t need one then or now.” I darted out in front of him and planted myself in his path. “I’m not afraid of you.”
Ryder looked me up and down in a way a farmer checked out a fatted calf to be slaughtered. “No, you’re not. But you should be.”
Folding my arms, I stood my ground. “You think I don’t know why you’re doing this. I heard about the Spades, Walter McMillian, and the history of cowards that went along with this school’s barbaric traditions instead of fighting them.”
Ryder laughed. It was a sound without mirth. “What can you do? Quae sequenda traditio.”
“But I didn’t think you were so pathetic, Ryder.”
The smile melted off his face. “Excuse me?”
“The tough Ryder Shea—running so scared from the Spades that he jumps whenever a card appears in a lo
cker. I understand why everyone else is too pathetic to stand up to them, but I thought you had backbone.” I treated him to the same dissecting look he gave me. “Just one of the many ways you disappoint.”
Ryder’s face could have been chipped from granite for all the expression he showed, the same couldn’t be said for the look in his eyes. I always felt deep down that Ryder wanted to hurt me. That he wanted me broken and bleeding at his feet. This was the same look he gave me when he threw me in the pool. The look in his eyes when he promised to get my mother arrested.
His free hand rose—slowly, unhurriedly—and wrapped around my neck. I swallowed against his palm as cool fingers pressed on my throat.
“This is what you don’t seem to understand, Valentina.” His grip wasn’t tight enough to choke, but a thread of fear wrapped around my spine. I didn’t fight him when he drew me to himself. “I’m not hurting you because you’re marked.” His thumb traced a lazy pattern on my neck, enticing goose bumps to break out on my body. “I’m doing this because I want to. Because there is nothing I enjoy more than seeing you cry.”
My lower lip began to tremble and I bit down on it hard. He wouldn’t see me react.
Ryder bent his head until his face was hovering millimeters from my own. “I’m not afraid of the Spades,” he said, his breath ghosting over my mouth. “They’ve given me everything I’ve ever wanted: to be a Knight and to see you broken.”
“You won’t break me,” I whispered.
“I will,” he replied like he was stating a simple fact. “Marked or not, it was always going to end this way.” Ryder’s silver orbs swept over my face, unease filled me when the look of them began to change. “It’s a shame though. You’ve gotten so beautiful.”
I gasped when the pressure on my neck increased ever so slightly. Fear competed with my shock. Beautiful? What was he saying?
“Ryder,” I croaked. “Let me go.”
He cocked his head. “Do you remember our kiss, Val?”
“No.”
He laughed. “Liar, but that’s okay. Maverick and Ezra tell me that’s another way you’ve gotten better with age.”
A flush crept up my neck. “I said let me go.”