“Sadly, my water broke at twenty-one weeks, and he didn’t make it.” I look over at my father who groans, and my mother gets up and goes over to him. I get up and walk to my purse by the door. Grabbing my wallet, I walk over to them and take out the picture of me and Gabriel. “This is Gabriel.” I hand my mother the picture, and she holds it for my father, who sobs with his hand over his mouth.
Casey walks over and looks at the picture, and he turns and looks at Jacob. “All alone,” he hisses. “She did that shit all by herself.”
“Cowboy.” Olivia gets up and walks to him, grabbing his hand in hers. He looks at her, and something she says settles him, and he just looks at me.
“That’s not fair,” I say. “I didn’t tell him. I told no one. I couldn’t …” I wipe away the tears. “He was my secret, and he was my everything.”
“Kallie,” Olivia says softly, and Casey now puts his arm around her. “I’m so, so sorry that you had to keep this to yourself.”
I blink away the tears. “It was hard not to tell everyone how beautiful he was.” I smile. “But now I get to share him with you all.” I turn to look at Jacob. “We can share him with you now.”
“I love you,” he says, burying his face in my neck, and I feel his tears on my neck.
“I’m a grandfather,” my father says, looking at my mother, who cries her own tears and wipes his away. “You should have told me.”
“I know,” she says softly, “but it wasn’t my story to tell.”
“I want to put his picture up on the wall,” my mother says. “I want his picture on the wall where he belongs with our family.”
“Right after lunch, we can go into town and get frames.” My father pulls her to him.
“Well,” I say, “this was a bit easier than I thought it would be.”
“We haven’t told my mother yet,” Jacob mumbles, and I look at him. “Might as well get it over with.”
“There is no way she is going to Cristine’s house without me,” my mother practically yells. I look over at her and so does Jacob.
“Charlotte,” my father says, and my mother shakes her head.
“No.” I look at her, and she looks back at me. “You aren’t going to her house. If you want, invite her here.”
“What am I missing?” Jacob says, and I look back at my mother, wondering the same thing.
“Nothing.” My mother tries to pretend that there is nothing, but now Casey speaks up.
“If we are sharing everything, might as well share that, Mom.” He looks at her, and I know he knows. When I look at my father, even he avoids my eyes.
“What is going on?” I ask them, angry.
My mother just looks at Jacob. “I’m sorry,” she says. “When you left, your mother came over here.” She sits down, and all eyes are on her. “She was angry that you were suffering and blamed it all on Kallie.” My leg starts to tremble while she continues the story. “Everything was her fault.” My mother points at me. “Well, I told her that we should let you two work out your own things. She said some not nice things, and I’m not repeating them, but—”
I hear a roar come out of Jacob at the same time I look at my mother. “Tell me.”
“No,” she says, shaking her head.
“I want to know,” I say, and my stomach is already in my throat.
“Kallie,” my mother says softly, “it doesn’t matter now.”
I stand and drop Jacob’s hand from mine. “It matters to me.”
My mother looks at Jacob almost for permission, and he just nods at her. “I want you to know that her words were nothing but her being angry.”
“Mom.” I say her name too loud.
“That Jacob obviously didn’t love you or he would have never strayed.” My mother says the words, and although I thought I was ready for it, it cuts me right through the heart. “That if you kept your house in order, this would never have happened.”
“That fucking—” Casey says. Olivia’s hand snaps out, and she blocks his mouth.
“Excuse me,” I say, looking at the floor, the tears making it difficult to see. “I need to …” Walking toward the stairs, I run up them and barely make it to the bathroom before a foot is shoved in right before I can close the door.
“Oh, no, you don’t,” Jacob says. I don’t say anything because his arms go around me, and I sob in his arms. “She is never going to talk to you like that ever.” I can’t say anything. “I swear, Kallie, she won’t.”
Pushing off from him, I leave him standing there, looking at me, as I close the door. “She isn’t the only one who is going to think that or has thought it,” I say, wiping the tears from my face, “and I know I shouldn’t care, and I know it isn’t the truth.”
“It’s not the truth.” He comes to me. “I’ve loved you my whole life. I’ve loved you when I didn’t know what love was. I wish I could make it all go away. But …”
I raise my head. “I know, and I would never let you put Ethan in that position or take you away from him.”
“Now with regard to my mother, she will never ever say those words again. I promise you that,” he takes me in his arms. “I agree with your mother. I’m going to tell her to come here. No way will you walk.”
“No,” I say loudly, “she will not make me walk with my head down.”
He smiles. “Okay, but I want her to come here. I want her to be the one walking with her head down.”
“Okay, fine,” I say softly. “I didn’t think of it like that, but yeah.”
There is a knock on the door, and we both look over as the door creaks open. “Hey,” Olivia says softly, “so no pressure or anything, but Casey is foaming at the mouth, and I think he said something about fixin’ to and a hill of beans, and I swear I have no idea what he’s saying.”
Laughing now, I look over at her. “It doesn’t amount to a hill of beans?”
“Yes.” She points at me. “That’s the hill of beans.”
“It means it doesn’t amount to anything and is hog wash.”
“That’s what your father said,” Olivia now says, and I hear my mother calling my name.
“If I don’t get some food on the table,” she starts to say, “they are both going to get madder than a wet hen.”
Olivia looks at me. “Beans, hog wash, and now a wet hen.” She shakes her head. “It’s like I’m on another planet.”
“Tell my mother we’ll be right there.” I look at Olivia, who nods and closes the door.
I walk to the sink and wash my face off and then dab it with the towel. “You ready?” Jacob asks, and I look at him. “Let’s get some food in you.”
We walk downstairs and into the kitchen where my mother looks like she spent the night and morning cooking. “I’m so hungry.” I sit in the chair and look over at my father, who just smiles at me, and then look over at Casey, who side-eyes Olivia. “What’s with him?”
“Nothing,” Olivia mumbles, looking over at him. “Let’s eat.”
Chapter Twenty-Three
Jacob
“What time will she be here?” Charlotte asks from behind me, and I look up. I’ve been sitting outside since I called my mother, trying to calm down. I’ve been trying not to lose my shit, to be honest. When I heard what my mother said, I wanted to jump into the truck and go to her house and yell at the top of my lungs.
“She should be here soon,” I say. She smiles at me and walks back into the house, and the door opens again.
“Hey,” Kallie says softly, and I look over at her and smile. Fuck, she makes me so complete. She makes me want to have it all and do it all. “You okay?” She puts her head on my shoulder and wraps her arm around mine.
“You need to calm down.”
“I am calm,” I lie, and she just looks at me. “Okay, fine, I’m raging.” She gives me time to talk. “There is so much.” I shake my head. “I’m not holding back this time.”
“Jacob.” When she whispers my name and leans in to kiss me, we hear the crunch of
“Well,” she says when she gets close to us, “what is this all about?”
“Hi, Mom.” Standing, I wait for Kallie to get up, and I slip my hand into hers.
“Hi, Cristine,” Kallie says, and my mother just nods at her. “We should get out of this heat.”
I wait for her to walk into the house, and I look at my mother, but she avoids my eyes, which makes me even angrier. I wait for her to walk in before me, and I hear shouting right away.
“You can’t use biscuit in that sentence.” I hear Casey say followed by Olivia shouting at him.
“Why not?” We walk into them facing off at each other. “If you are not nice, you get no biscuit.” I hear Kallie burst out laughing, but Olivia doesn’t stop as she walks to Casey with her finger out, pointing at his chest. “You can say hens get wet and beans in a frill, but I can’t use biscuit?”
“Okay, you two,” Charlotte says. “Take this to your house.” She looks at Casey and then looks at Olivia. “Tomorrow, we can go over the list of food that you can use and what you can’t use.”
“Let’s go, cowboy,” Olivia says and walks by him. I’m expecting him to make her walk by him, but he stops her by grabbing her hand.
“There is so much I need to say right now,” Billy says, and I just look at him sitting at the table.
“Well, then …” Charlotte claps her hands. “Would you like some tea?” she asks my mother, but Mom just shakes her head.
“What was all the fuss to get here?” my mother asks, and then she looks at Kallie, who is now holding my hand. “One week in and I see that things are back to normal.” She looks at me. “God knows how long it’s going to last this time,” she mumbles, and I’m about to snap at her, but Kallie starts first.
“The reason we called you here is to tell you firsthand about something.” She looks at me. “There are things that happened when I left and—”
“You mean when you gave up on my son and hightailed it out of town without looking back?” my mother asks.
“Okay, then,” Charlotte says, and Billy gets up with her tone and she looks over at him, “I’ve held my tongue for eight years.” She comes to stand next to Kallie, and she holds her hand. “You were my best friend,” she starts to say, “and when I needed you by my side, all you did was blame Kallie. You never once looked at the whole picture.”
“That’s because your daughter was to blame for all of this!” my mother shouts.
“My daughter carried your grandson by herself!” Charlotte yells out this time, and my mother just looks at her. “That’s right, Cristine, while you went around town telling everyone how happy you were that you were going to have a grandson, I had to hold my daughter’s hand while she buried our grandson. She did that all by herself. Carried the pain and the burden by herself. A piece of her gone forever.” I look over at Charlotte.
“Now I’m sorry that I’m doing this without easing into it, but I’ve had enough of you blaming Kallie for this.” My mother puts her hands to her chest, and Charlotte walks over to the picture that Kallie took out before. “This is Gabriel.” She hands my mother a picture, and she takes it in her shaking hand. “He was born November thirteenth.” She looks over at Kallie who now wipes her own tear away. “And he was beautiful.”
“He looks like Jacob,” Mom says and wipes her tear away.
“Mom, this stops today,” I finally say. “This blaming Kallie stops today.” I hold onto Kallie as I pour it out for her. “I made a mistake, one mistake, and I’ve paid for it. I’ve watched you mourn Dad. I’ve stood by you when Travis hightailed it after Dad died. I’ve stepped into his shoes, and not once have I complained about it. Not once did I ask you for anything.” I take a deep breath. “I’m not asking you. I’m telling you this stops today.” I look over at Kallie, who just stares at me. “If you can’t respect Kallie, then it’s over. I won’t call you, and I won’t come over. You’ll lose another son. Just this time, I’m going to be right in front of your face with my happiness. Mine and Kallie’s because she’s my choice, she’s always been my choice, and she will always be my choice. I will always choose her.”
“Jacob …” my mother starts, and I hold up my hand.
“There are no second chances, Mom, but I was lucky enough to get one, and I’m going to do what I need to do to keep her. I want to make her happy, and I want her to be comfortable to walk anywhere without people pointing and throwing the mistake that I made in her face.” I look at Kallie. “I made a mistake with Savannah, and I broke the trust she had in me. I can’t even begin to think how it would feel for it to happen to me. And if I’m honest”—I shake my head—“I don’t think I could survive it.”
“Jacob.” She says my name and picks up our joined hands and kisses my fingers.
“I want a life with her, and I want to have all the kids she will allow me to have with her. I want to wake up with her and go to bed with her. I want to sit out on my porch when we’re eighty and watch our grandkids run around. I want you in that life also, Mom, but I won’t compromise Kallie to make you happy.”
“You have a son,” my mother says. “You see your child in pain, and you would do whatever you need to do to make him happy. That is what I was trying to do.”
“The things you said about Kallie were horrible,” Charlotte says. She shakes her head. “Never once did I say anything about Jacob. Not one time did I throw anything in your face. I can forgive, but I’m not going to forget. I just can’t.”
“Mom.” Kallie wraps an arm around her.
“No,” she says. “For eight years, you were gone. We didn’t have you for Christmas, we didn’t have you for birthdays, we had nothing. I had to sit down on Christmas Day and have an empty chair, and I couldn’t do or say anything to anyone. I’m not going to do that anymore. I will not let her chase you away.”
“I won’t,” my mother whispers. “I won’t. I’m so sorry, Kallie.” She looks down now. “But you didn’t just run from Jacob, you ran from me, too. You were like a daughter to me, and you just cut me out.” She wipes tears from her eyes. “I lost a daughter that day also, and I know I should have reached out, and I should have done so many things differently, and for that I’m sorry.” She looks at Charlotte. “To both of you.”
“Thank you,” Kallie says. “I wish I could go back eight years, and things would be different, but we all made choices that day, and we all have to live with them.”
“Well, this has been exhausting,” Billy finally says and walks over to the liquor cabinet and takes out his bottle of whiskey. Pouring himself a shot, he drinks it and then pours another. He walks over and takes out more shot glasses and fills them and lifts one. “To Gabriel.”
We all walk over to the table and grab one. I raise my glass. “To my boy Gabriel,” I say and grab Kallie and kiss her. “To our boy.”
Kallie and I sit on the swing outside on her porch, and I look in at my mother and Charlotte talking quietly on the couch as she holds the picture of Gabriel in her hand. “Are you going to go pack a bag?”
“When is Ethan coming back?” she asks.
“Savannah texted me today that she’s staying until Tuesday since Ethan has a school holiday on Monday and Tuesday,” I say, and she looks at me.
“Don’t you work tomorrow?”
“I do,” I say. “And?”
“Well, I guess I could come and then come here when you leave,” she says, and I just look out at the trees.
“Or you could stay at my house.” I look over at her, and she just looks at me.
“I have to work, and all my stuff is here,” she says, “so I will come over tonight, but tomorrow, I’ll come here and work. Then you can pick me up after work, and I can come back to your place.”
I nod my head. “That sounds good. Tuesday night, I want you to meet Ethan.”
“He’s just been away from you for four days, and you’re going to just bring me in?” She turns to look at me.
“Yup,” I say. “I already spoke to him about you. So laying the groundwork has already started.”
“Jacob.” She says my name, and I stand and look down at her.
“Kallie, I’m done wasting fucking time,” I say. “I’m done. Starting tomorrow, I don’t care who knows and who doesn’t that we are together. Actually, starting now, I don’t care. We can go down to Main Street and make out in the middle of the street and give them all something to talk about.”
She rolls her lips, hiding the smile. “So touchy.”
“Yeah. I am. Now go get a bag,” I say and then shake my head. “Fuck it, don’t get a bag. You can wear my shirt to bed.” I pull her up by her hand, and I’m about to put her over my shoulder when she pulls her hand away.
“Hold your horses. I’m going to pack a bag.” She shakes her head. “Don’t be blowin’ up a storm.” I smile now.
“There’s my country girl.” I walk to her. “Pretty as a peach.”
“Hush your mouth and kiss me,” she says, the same thing she used to always say to me when she had enough of what we were talking about.
Chapter Twenty-Four
Kallie
“I’ll pick you up at five,” Jacob says from beside me, my eyes looking out the window. “Kallie.” He calls my name, and I look over at him. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” I say. Looking back out the window, I don’t want to make eye contact with him because he’s going to see right through me. “I’m not feeling well.”
“Really?” he says like he doesn’t believe me, and I wouldn’t either. This morning, I was fine. I woke up with him giving me little kisses on my bare shoulder, my tank top pushed up while he held my breast in his hand. It took a matter of sixty seconds for him to turn me on my back and slide into me. For the past two days, it’s been bliss to wake up with each other every single morning and have dinner with each other. And then just sitting with each other before bed is everything, but, and there was a huge but. “You were fine this morning.”
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