by Ann Aguirre
I collapsed.
For a few seconds, I just curled up on my side and waited for the pain to implode me. But it receded, leaving me more or less in one piece, though I shed gold sparks like a lizard molting from its old skin. After a while, I staggered upright to find a small boy staring at me wide-eyed. There was no way to gauge what he’d seen, but adults never believed little kids anyway. So I put my finger slowly to my lips, and he ran off in the opposite direction.
So … I killed Buzzkill twice. The hag too. Screw you, Wedderburn. I beat you. Again. He’d be so pissed when he found out. But I couldn’t savor the triumph. My brain felt like liquid oxygen sloshing around in my skull as I stepped out of the alley.
Recognizing me, Kian stared, taking in my sweaty dishevelment. “You look like shit.”
Which was concrete proof that he wasn’t in love with me. You’re welcome, I thought. But it was also gratifying that he had the confidence to say something like that. Before, he was so skittish and timid that it hurt my heart.
“Rough run. I haven’t worked out in a while.”
He appraised my jeans and sweatshirt with a dubious eye. “Maybe put on exercise clothes first next time?”
“That’s just a gimmick to get your money. Did cavemen wear track pants when they ran after saber-toothed tigers? No, they did not.”
“God, are you doing that Paleo thing? My aunt won’t shut up about it and now there’s no bread in the house. No wonder you’re acting weird. Want to get something to eat?”
How am I supposed to act after killing the thing that meant to murder you?
Mentally, I shrugged. “Okay. Let’s have coffee.”
THE DEATH OF WINTER
“You smell like violence,” Selena said when I got home a few hours later.
Exhaustion overwhelmed me, and my legs went watery. It had been pure hell to hang out with Kian with the claw marks burning on my back. I’d been careful to keep him in front of me to avoid awkward questions, but the pain made it difficult to focus. A text from his uncle finally prompted him to head home, so I wearily did the same.
Now I have to break the bad news to Selena.
“I had to fight the hag.”
“Without me? That’s so mean. You know I wanted a go at her.” She radiated pure petulance, like I’d set out to rob her of a battle.
“There was no time to find you and still save Kian. It’s not like you have a phone.”
She sighed. “True. Maybe I should get one. Are you hurt?”
“Yeah. If you’re feeling sympathetic, you could patch up my back.” The gouges still hadn’t clotted fully, and my T-shirt beneath the hoodie was sticky-crunchy with blood.
“You know I’m not a healer, right?”
“I meant the regular way—iodine, bandages, or whatever’s in the first-aid kit.”
“Oh, sure, that I can do.” She got up and went over to the cupboard that held the supplies. “I can’t wait to tell Big Bro that we took out another of the big chill’s minions.”
“You’re taking credit for this too?”
“Of course. Immortals are starting to avoid me. The rest bring offerings.” She pointed at a pile she’d dumped by the door: statues, ornate and gilded treasure boxes, plus a case of olives and high-quality mineral water. Whoever sent those knows her best. “Nobody’s sure how I’m suddenly so lethal, and it is awesome.”
A half smile was the best I could do. “Glad you’re having fun.”
That makes one of us.
We headed to the bathroom and I stripped out of my layers to reveal my bare back. Gritting my teeth, I managed not to whimper as she dumped something sting-y and astringent on my wounds. Selena sucked in a breath as she leaned closer. I craned my neck and failed to see what had alarmed her. The motion made my wounds feel even worse.
“I don’t want to alarm you…”
“But?” Her bedside manner sucked, and despite her intentions, I was already freaking out a little. What could bother a moon goddess who lived to hunt and kill things?
“You’re not just losing blood,” she said.
“Huh?”
“You’re losing … mass too. Part of your back’s missing. It’s like … I don’t know what it’s like. A bandage will not fix this.”
I angled my body to try to glimpse the problem in the mirror, and there were just slashes of darkness, not injuries as much as tiny dimension rifts. “Do the best you can. I’ll cover the rest with my shirt.”
While she wrapped up, I tried not to worry about how long I had. Patients with a terminal illness never knew, either. The doctors might predict three months, and people hung on much longer than anticipated. Eventually I washed up, careful with the gauze, and crashed for the rest of the day. In the morning, mild astonishment filtered in with the dawn sunlight, surprise that I was still around.
Selena wasn’t, however. I’d gotten used to her disappearances, so I just went about my usual routine of avoiding my own reflection while I got ready to guard-stalk Kian. This time, I stopped cold, shocked by my own face. Pallid skin, deep bruises beneath my eyes, and the expanse of my forehead showed flecks of golden light. I had the look of someone struggling with a fatal illness or maybe radiation poisoning. Right, almost forgot the makeup.
Late now, I rushed out to make my morning rounds. But before I made it ten steps toward the bus stop, I passed through … something. A sliver of ice pierced me, and I fell forever, until I landed hard in a snowdrift. My hands already hurt, and my heartbeat slowed in the extreme chill. The blood in my veins turned sluggish as my eyeballs froze in their sockets. There was nothing I could fight, just the slow death of winter, and only an endless desolation of snow, as far as my locked gaze could see.
Wedderburn’s voice rumbled from all around me. “You are pathetic, less than nothing. How have you blocked my will, vermin?”
Frozen like a statue, I couldn’t reply or even glare. Aegis thrummed on my wrist, but in the heart of this pocket plane, likely similar to the one where Dwyer had brought me when we fought in the other timeline, my sword lacked the strength to free me. So close, I was so close. The winter king prowled into my field of vision, every bit as terrifying as I’d once thought him. He was all insectoid ice, dead eyes, and long, spidery fingers that dragged down my frigid cheek like he’d peel my skin as one would a grape.
“I shall savor this. While your pain cannot possibly offer sufficient recompense…” He circled me with a playful menace, examining me from all angles. “I can break you into pieces first, perhaps carve your face into a new shape.”
Aegis, I thought.
A hot spot formed on my wrist, burning my flesh, and it glowed gold beneath the blue-white ice, but I could only wriggle my wrist, no way to activate it fully. Not enough, not nearly enough. Wedderburn traced the slope of my shoulder, the curve of my hip, and I couldn’t shudder, could only taste the bile in my throat, and then it froze too.
“Losing a nose to frostbite is exquisite agony,” he said.
Stop toying with me.
Now that he had me helpless, the monster meant to torture me. His curved claws drifted closer to my face, flicking back and forth between my staring eyes. “Perhaps I’ll pluck these out, one at a time, or I could have your teeth first. They’d make a lovely necklace.”
Then he gestured, and my mouth thawed. “I’m weary of such a one-sided conversation. If you answer to my satisfaction, I might finish quickly.”
“Screw you,” I said.
Possibly not the wisest decision I ever made.
But before he could retaliate, a brilliant flash of light blinded me. Wedderburn swore in a language so alien it hurt my ears. The pain faded, not a good sign, and sleepiness set in. I recognized this feeling from when I escaped from the Black Watch compound with the Harbinger, only this wasn’t mild hypothermia.
I won’t last long.
“Couldn’t have said it better myself,” Selena called, swinging a leather bag over her head like a bola.
Th
e sack opened, and five searing coals flew out, bright enough to burn like miniature suns. Three of them hit me, and the other two nailed Wedderburn. Between that heat and Aegis, I broke free and dove away—or tried, rather. Numb and clumsy, I flopped in the snow instead. Wedderburn let out a scream of sheer rage. In this eerie landscape, icicles speared the snow in the distance, and an avalanche began, millions of tons of snow hurtling toward us.
Holy shit.
“Move fast,” Selena snapped.
In response, I stumbled to my feet and activated Aegis. It was impossible for me to approximate a battle-ready stance; all my strength went into positioning the blade before me. Human determination can only go so far. Yet she nodded approval and raced across the snow like a lightning strike, slashing and weaving at the winter whatsit until it was all he could do to block her, likely knowing her blade had the power to paralyze.
And that’s all I need.
“How?” he roared at her. “How are you here? This is my domain!”
“I can always aid one of my oath-bound acolytes.” Selena laughed and dodged an ice lance hurled at her head.
Their clash sped past in bursts I could hardly track. Mostly, they showed as blurs and bursts of light, interspersed with Selena’s laughter and Wedderburn’s snarls. Inching closer, I waited for my opening. My feet felt like they were encased in ice. While this might be fun for Selena, I just wanted to survive. The need to hold on until Kian’s birthday defined me now. Icy knives rained down from above, and I slashed at them with Aegis, clumsily, missing most. The move almost put me on the ground, so tempting to just let it happen. The cold would take me—
No.
Disjointed scraps of a Dylan Thomas poem surfaced, lending me strength. Do not go gentle into that good night. Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright …
I whispered, “I will not go gentle.”
“Now!” Selena shouted.
Her dagger lodged in his chest, and he stood frozen, just as he’d done to me. I didn’t trifle with him; I rushed in a graceless stumble and rammed Aegis through his chest. The winter king didn’t die easy. He exploded in a shard of ice and snow, whirling into a blizzard all around us. Snow got in my nose and mouth, stinging, blinding.
Somewhere nearby, Selena shouted in triumph, “Winter is not coming, bitch!”
Footfalls crackled toward me. I cleared my ice-frosted lashes in time to see the pocket world imploding. She latched on to my wrist; her steely grip hurt, and then we flashed out in a beam of light so bright it burned my eyes. The sensation of free fall hurtled my stomach into my throat, and then we hit the ground hard in an alley near the studio.
I shook uncontrollably for a full five minutes while Selena communicated with someone using runes or stones or who the hell knew what. No way could I process all of this; it was still early morning, and the sun shone like a lemon drop overhead. Even the sky seemed surreal somehow, the blue of an Impressionist painting. When I stared at the passersby, I feared their faces might be melting off. The sad part, nobody spared us a glance. I’d gotten it right when I thought before that homeless people were invisible.
When my tongue thawed sufficiently and she finished clacking her stones, I mumbled, “Did you use me as bait again?”
“Not on purpose. I came as fast as I could. But holy shit, who could’ve known he’d set a snare and handle you in person? He hasn’t left his fortress in centuries.”
“What was that, exactly?” I hauled to my feet, aware that the pavement had chunks of dried vomit nearby.
“A trapdoor, kind of, attuned to you. A thousand other people could’ve walked over that patch of ground and nothing would’ve happened.”
“If he could do that, why did he waste so much time sending goons after me?”
“At first, I’m sure he didn’t view you as a real threat. Look at yourself.”
“I’m really not. I’m more of a finishing move.” Which made me a valuable ally, but I didn’t have the strength or stamina to go toe-to-toe like she did.
Selena shot me a dirty look. “Don’t interrupt. As I was saying, that construct requires a serious outlay of power … So does the pocket dimension. That would be like you building a mousetrap out of a nuke. Would that be your first solution to a rodent problem?”
The analogy made me grumpy, but I got her point. “No. Did we actually—”
“Yep,” she said with relish.
Two timelines, one without Winter and the other sans Summer. The balance seemed right, though what I knew of such things could fill a thimble. I was too young and ignorant to have this much power. Rochelle’s words about my sword echoed in my head, and it appeared she was probably right. This is a curse … I was just too thick to realize.
“If you’re up to it, Big Bro would like to see you.” She steadied me as it looked like I might pitch forward.
“I suppose it wouldn’t do to piss him off.”
Selena shook her head. “He’s euphoric at the moment, so this is the right time to pay your respects. Once he levels out, he’ll have questions. Luckily for you, he’ll celebrate for longer than you’ll be around.”
That should’ve cheered me up.
It didn’t.
Dwyer gave us the royal treatment, fetching us in his personal silver town car. We got so many weird looks when we ambled out of the alley looking like twice-baked shit and got into this luxurious beast. I tilted my head back against the buttery leather upholstery and wished I had an appetite because I’d try all the gourmet snacks. It seemed pointless now since it would all taste the same.
“Your bro promised I’d never know you were around, by the way. I feel like we have different definitions of obtrusive.”
“Please,” she said, smirking. “You’d be lost without me.”
Probably. Even carrying her token, I was already silently trickling into oblivion. Closing my eyes, I dozed the rest of the way. When I perked up, I saw that the driver had brought us to the same coffeehouse where we’d met before. The writers and housewives stared longingly at Dwyer, who was all gilded elegance in a dark suit and sunglasses. He rose when we headed toward his seat by the window.
“Welcome,” he said warmly. He greeted Selena by kissing both her cheeks, and then to my astonished discomfort, he did the same to me. His aura washed over me like a hot bath, instantly soothing my chapped skin and mild frostbite.
“Thanks.”
Selena chose a chair, and I fell into the one next to her. Since I just wanted to get this over with and maybe sleep for a week, I let them do the talking. She ordered his henchmen to get her some fizzy water through a series of hand gestures. They paused to ask if I wanted anything, but I shook my head.
“Today, you two are my favorite beings in all creation,” Dwyer said eventually. “Ask for anything, and if it’s in my power, it will be yours.”
“Gimme your—”
“No,” he said.
Selena sulked. “Winter is dead. And you said anything.”
“I’m being magnanimous and benevolent. Stop making me look bad.”
“You’re doing that on your own.”
Okay, maybe they are siblings.
Quietly, I cleared my throat. The bickering stopped.
“My apologies, little one.”
It was amazing that he could still patronize me when I’d delivered the killing blow to his archrival, but whatever. I should scram before I lost my patience with his self-aggrandizement and solar-size ego. Gritting my teeth, I smiled and nodded, pretending this wasn’t a colossal waste of time and my back didn’t feel weird.
There’s a hole in it.
Selena poked me. “Go ahead, don’t be shy. What do you want?”
Maybe …
“I promised someone I’d stick around until June third, but that may prove problematic.”
She did me the favor of explaining how I came from an alternate timeline while conveniently leaving out all the details that would make him want to turn me into bacon. He listened with g
rowing fascination and incredulity until she finished. Dwyer quieted, the wheels clearly turning in his head.
“The weapon…,” he began.
“It goes with her.” Selena half got out of her chair, seeming ready to fight.
The immortal-killing sword won’t be a factor for much longer, so none of your rivals can use me against you.
“So then … what’s your request?” the sun god asked at last.
“Can you fix her?” Selena cut in.
Her dark eyes said she cared—that she wanted me to be okay. I smiled, wishing I could express her how much she’d come to mean to me in such a short time. Without her, I might have died of loneliness, not disintegration.
Dwyer sighed. “I did say anything in my power. Sadly, that’s far beyond my abilities. Wouldn’t you prefer me to thaw a glacier instead?”
“That would flood the world,” Selena snapped.
Oh, man. I hope she keeps him out of trouble after I’m gone.
Since I didn’t expect he could heal me, I suffered no disappointment. So I considered and then made what I hoped was a reasonable request. “Maybe … a token, like the one Selena gave me?” Maybe their combined energies could bind me long enough to keep my promise.
The coward in me fought the urge to set the watch and bolt. I couldn’t—for two reasons. First, I had no idea if going back would heal the damage I’d already suffered, so I might just continue dissolving once I got there. If that was the case, it would be a fitting punishment. Plus, my scientific side wondered if I was too far along in this chemical process for reversal to be possible. Second, that pledge was all that kept me going through some truly desolate moments. I’d be damned if I abandoned it now.
No, I’ll stay. I’ll finish what I started.
The sun god nodded, seeming pensive. “That’s easily done. But it’s such a trivial matter, it hardly seems enough in payment.”
“It is to me,” I said gravely.
In response, he pulled a battered coin from his pocket and offered it to me. “I have carried this for two thousand years. It … means a great deal to me, so I hope you’ll care for it.”
“As long as I can.”