He accepted.
They moved casually across campus, taking in the sights and sounds of homecoming week. Energy crackled in the air, despite the morning rain and reduced number of visitors. The Bellemont student body was unfazed. The school’s spirit and pride were everywhere, from the banners and pendants to the occasional painted face and chest of a hooting male. Signs had been staked into the ground and erected at crossroads announcing the big game. Only two days away now.
Hopefully the nut terrorizing Gwen didn’t have any grand attack planned to commemorate the fifth anniversary of their first violent encounter. The unexpected thought tightened every muscle in her body and caused her steps to stutter.
“You okay?” Lucas asked, noticing instantly.
“Fine.” They could talk more about the gruesome possibility later. Her newfound bravery was waning, and she hoped some food and caffeine would give her the pick-me-up she needed.
Lucas traced lazy circles against her hand with his thumb as they moved deeper into campus and her timelines became more entangled. Her traitorous body responded immediately, confused and elated. He’d always done that. Made the circles. And they’d always excited her. She’d imagined the gentle caresses as tiny messages shared by only them. A secret code for she was his. And he was hers.
She gave herself a mental shake. That was another time, and these circles meant nothing. They were habit, or muscle memory, at best. Something he did with every woman whose hand he held at worst.
She dared a glance in his direction and found him looking her way. Her cheeks flared, certain he could read her mind.
“It’s strange being on campus together again like this, huh?” he asked, lifting their joined hands slightly and smiling.
Yep. Reading her mind as suspected. “I promised myself I’d never come back here. Now, this is my second trip in three days. I never expected to see you again, and I’m sleeping in your bed.” The heat in her cheeks spread to her neck and chest. “You know what I mean. Everything about this week has been unexpected and weird.”
He turned away with a single nod.
“But it’s nice,” she said. “Being with you again. Not the other stuff.”
“You don’t like my bed,” he asked, a teasing glimmer in his eye.
She smiled. “You know what I mean. Your bed is fine.” A little empty without you in it but... The train of thought brought her mind to a full halt. Did she want him in bed with her? For what?
A parade of images began immediately. Lying with him, beneath the covers. His warm hand stroking hair from her face, his gentle lips pressing kisses to her cheeks, nose and eyelids, whispering sweet promises into her ear as he left a trail of caresses from her earlobe to her collarbone.
She sucked in a breath, feeling her body come alert with the fantasy. It’d been years since she’d considered anything so intimate. She’d avoided the thoughts, afraid they would bring memories of the attack with them. But they hadn’t. Now, on a campus she’d avoided, in broad daylight, a few tiny circles drawn on her hand had kick-started her sex drive? Okay, maybe those long-dormant feelings weren’t exactly a revving engine, but Lucas had definitely turned the key. She knew the fantasies couldn’t lead anywhere. Imagining a man’s touch and receiving it were two very different things. Besides, she had scars. Inside and out. Too many for even someone as wonderful as Lucas Winchester to overlook. And he shouldn’t have to.
He pulled the student center door open for her, then followed her inside. “You’ve gotten very quiet.”
“Just thinking,” she admitted with a smile, unsure how they’d crossed campus so quickly.
He gave her a curious look, but didn’t press the issue.
She longed to hug him for what he was doing to her. For the first time in too long, she was beginning to feel alive. Maybe her fantasies would never be anything more, but they were still major progress in her overall healing, and she appreciated the breakthrough Lucas had brought her more than he would ever know.
They ate bad chow mein from the food court and watched students through nostalgic eyes. Had she and Lucas really been that carefree not so long ago? She’d asked herself the same question on a regular basis since starting over in New Plymouth. Everything about her life there had always felt surreal. She’d assumed it was a side effect from her trauma, that she simply hadn’t engaged with her world in emotional ways. Looking back, however, she wondered if perhaps the carefully created facade had never really fooled her. And maybe somewhere deep down she’d known it couldn’t last. That she’d have to face the ugliness eventually, if she wanted to truly be happy.
And she did.
Lucas ordered two coffees from the cart outside the student center, then passed her a cup. The temperatures were falling, and it was a long way back across campus. They skipped holding hands in favor of cradling their steamy cups against their palms as they moved.
He nudged her with his elbow a few minutes later. “You really think it’s been nice being with me again?”
She smiled against the rim of her cup, pleased she wasn’t the only one thinking about them as they strolled. “I do. I’m glad I came, and I’m glad you became a detective. I don’t know who else I would’ve trusted with my fear, and I can see now it was important I got help. I suppose it all worked out kind of perfectly.” She hoped the man stalking her could see that, and that he blamed himself. He’d kept her isolated and afraid for a long while, but in the end, he’d brought her full circle. Back to the man she’d started out with, on the campus where they’d fallen in love.
A car alarm sounded in the distance, and Gwen jumped. She pressed a palm to her chest and laughed. “Sorry.”
“At least you saved your coffee,” he said, eyeballing the cup in her raised hand. He smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes.
She scanned the world around them. No one paid the alarm any attention, and eventually it stopped. Hopefully, she hadn’t said too much and inadvertently pushed Lucas away.
He set a hand against the small of her back as they walked, and she wasn’t sure why. Did he miss touching her now that they’d stopped holding hands? Did he want to feel more connected to her? Or did he just want to keep her close, like he’d said when suggesting they hold hands?
She wouldn’t know unless she asked, and she wasn’t ready to do that.
They sidestepped a group listening to a speech on global warming, then ducked carefully out of the way as crowd members attempted to snap photos of the speaker.
Lucas smiled over his shoulder as they passed. “You took more photos while we were dating than anyone I’ve ever known. Did you keep any of them?”
“A few.” She turned away to hide her blush. She’d only kept a few if that parameter included hundreds.
His fingers bent and flexed against her back. “Me, too.”
She dared a look at him. “You did?”
“All of them,” he said. “I will find this guy,” he added, changing the subject without warning. “The police forces in two towns are looking for him, watching and waiting for him to act out again. It’s only a matter of time before he does, and he will be caught. That’s a promise.”
Gwen slowed, then stopped. She turned to him on the narrow cobblestone path between seas of green grass and bustling pedestrians. Then she took a step in his direction, and the noisy, windy, bonfire-scented world fell away. “I have never blamed you for what happened to me, Lucas Winchester. Not for a single second. Not then and not now. Do you hear me?”
He averted his eyes, casting his gaze over her head to scan the world around them.
“Hey.” She poked a finger against his middle. “Look at me.”
He glanced back at her before moving his gaze elsewhere.
She curled her fingers into the material of his jacket and hauled him closer, careful not to spill her coffee or his. “You need to believe what I’m saying to y
ou. I don’t blame you,” she repeated, fiercely. “And you need to stop blaming yourself.”
His eyes snapped back to hers, mournful and full of regret. Emotion flickered over his face while he fought to maintain the careful blank expression.
“You said it wasn’t my fault,” she pushed. “Every time I woke up crying, convinced I was attacked because I knew better than to walk alone, even the short distance I was going, you told me it wasn’t my fault. Now I’m telling you,” she said, tugging again on his jacket. “It was never your fault, either.”
* * *
LUCAS STARED INTO the most fierce and most loving eyes he’d ever known. “Okay,” he answered softly, hoping he’d mean it one day. He couldn’t imagine not blaming himself for what had happened to her and all she’d been through, but he could barely think of that now.
Right now, he was captivated. To say he’d missed her would be like saying he’d missed oxygen after being deprived of it for six years. Being with Gwen again was like unearthing the best parts of himself and realizing how much he’d truly missed them. He’d always known she’d taken a piece of him with her when she’d left, but he hadn’t understood how much he’d needed them to feel whole. Standing with her now, in their tiny bubble made for two, her fingers curled into the material of his jacket, her warmth seeping into his long-dormant heart, he took his first real breath in years.
His free hand rose to carefully cup her narrow jaw.
Her eyes widened a moment, and he waited for her to step away or release him, but she leaned closer instead. The toes of their shoes already touching, she nuzzled her cheek against his palm.
Elation exploded inside him, and he ached to be closer still. He craved her kiss. To taste her sweetness, just once. He needed to know the heart-pummeling crush of emotion inside him wasn’t one-sided. That some part of her had missed him, too. But he couldn’t risk overstepping and accidentally pushing her away. Not now, when he still owed her the justice she deserved. He let his forehead fall to meet hers, wishing he knew how to help her heart find its way back to him.
His phone rang, breaking the spell and sending them each back a step.
Gwen looked bashfully away, setting her palm against her jaw, where his hand had been.
“Winchester,” Lucas answered, hoping for good news.
“Hey, little brother,” Derek said, his tone caught somewhere between mischief and regret.
Gwen slipped her hand into the crook of his arm, and they returned to walking. “What’s up?”
“Oh, you know,” he said. “Just swung by campus to check on you. Maybe give you a ride home.”
Lucas frowned. “Give us a ride home?”
Gwen turned to look at him.
And the little lot where they’d left Lucas’s truck came into view.
“Is that Derek?” Gwen asked, following Lucas’s gaze into the distance.
Derek leaned against his Mustang, staring at a pile of broken glass, glinting on the pavement. Campus security guards held back a small crowd, and a uniformed officer snapped pictures of Lucas’s truck.
“What happened?” he asked, towing Gwen forward, then breaking into a jog with her, as they neared the lot.
Derek greeted them, stuffing his phone back into his pocket and waving an open hand toward the mess, like a game show host.
Every one of Lucas’s truck tires had been slashed. The side windows broken. And a brief but pointed message had been carved deep into the shiny black paint.
SHE IS MINE.
Chapter Eighteen
Lucas slid into the back seat of Derek’s Mustang and moved to the center, hanging his arms over the edges of the seats in front of him.
Gwen took the passenger seat and shut the door. “Thanks for the ride, Derek.”
He grinned, then cast a goofy look at Lucas. “I think your girl likes me.”
“I’ve always liked you,” she said, fastening her seat belt with a smile. She cast a regretful look through the window as they trundled past the tow truck hooking up his pickup for a trip to the body shop. “Sorry about your truck, Lucas.”
Lucas grimaced. He was sorry about his truck, too, but more than that, he was infuriated to know he’d been followed again without knowing. Was he really so distracted with Gwen that he couldn’t tell when he was being outright stalked? He was equally frustrated by the fact that there weren’t any security cameras covering the small faculty lot where he’d parked, and that the son of a gun who’d ruined his paint job somehow believed that Gwen belonged to him. Like property. Or a play thing, he thought, recalling his own cat-and-mouse analogy. “Not your fault,” he told Gwen, a little too late by the look on her face. “We know he’s out there. It could be this beautiful Mustang next for all we know.”
Derek frowned. “Watch it.” He stroked her dashboard. “She’ll hear you.”
Gwen turned a bright smile on him. “You talk to your car?”
“Frequently,” he answered. “I like to keep her happy, and you should, too. Since it sounds as if you’re going to need a driver for a few days. Good thing I showed up when I did.”
“Why did you show up?” Lucas asked, refusing to entertain the idea of Derek as his driver for a few days. “And how’d you know where we were?” Even if he’d heard somehow that they were on campus, it was a big place. How had he found the truck in a small faculty lot?
“I track your truck,” Derek said, motoring into traffic outside the campus boundaries. “Your phone, too, but don’t get cranky about it. I track everyone I love. You never know when someone might need help. Like now.” He caught his eye in the rearview and smiled.
“You track my phone,” Lucas repeated, misplaced anger boiling hotter in his chest. “What is wrong with you?”
“I care,” Derek said. “I can’t help it. I’m a caring guy.”
Gwen laughed, and the sound drew both brothers’ attention. She blushed in response. “I think what we want to know,” she said to Derek, “is why you tracked us down. Did something happen? Do you have news?”
“Yes.” Derek grinned. “I just got back from New Plymouth. I stopped by the design firm where you work and spoke with your coworkers.”
“You questioned Gwen’s coworkers?” Lucas asked, frustration mounting high and fast. “Should I even ask how you got them to talk to you? Because impersonating an officer is illegal. You know that, right?”
Derek made a get-serious face in the rearview mirror, then turned back to the road, splitting his attention between traffic and Gwen. “I told them the truth. I’m a friend of Gwen’s from years ago, and I wanted to ask a few questions. Everyone was extremely helpful.”
“I’ll bet,” Gwen moaned. “I’ve never told them anything about my past. They know my folks live in Florida and I live in town. I don’t date and like to jog. That’s about all I was ever willing to share.”
“That would explain the intensity of their interest,” he said. “They loved that we were friends from way back. They’re all big fans of yours. I think your boss wants you to marry me,” he admitted. “She’s got a good eye. I’m not a bad catch.”
Gwen laughed again, and Lucas joined her. Derek wasn’t a bad catch for a woman not looking to catch anyone. Derek was too busy pushing everyone’s boundaries and looking for his next adrenaline rush to settle down, and Lucas couldn’t imagine a point in the future when that might change.
“Go on,” Lucas urged. “Out with it. I swear you are the worst storyteller.”
Derek’s lips curved down at the corners, unhappy about being called the worst at anything, no doubt. “I learned that Gwen’s coworker, Marina, stopped by her place to check on her last night. She said it was a last-minute decision. She’d debated all day because everyone knows Gwen’s a private person, but she wanted to let her know the office staff is thinking of her and wants to help if she needs anything at all.”
&nb
sp; “Derek,” Lucas warned, already at the end of his patience. “What happened when she stopped by?”
“That’s what I came to tell you,” he said, lifting a pointer finger into the air. “She saw a man on the property who said he was upgrading your security system. She thought that was a smart move given your situation, but she didn’t get a name for him or the company.”
Lucas’s pulse picked up. Gwen’s coworker had seen the stalker. Spoken to him.
“I didn’t order any upgrades,” Gwen said. “I already have their most comprehensive system.”
Derek took the next right onto the expressway. “That’s why I came to get you.” He stomped the pedal and launched every horse under the hood into action, catching up with traffic in seconds. “I thought we could all go check it out together.”
* * *
GWEN UNLOCKED THE front door, then stopped the wailing alarm. It plucked at her nerves to silence the system before the door was closed and locked behind her, but two giant Winchesters were currently wedged in the doorway, looking for signs of a previous forced entry.
“No one broke in,” she said, leading them to her office. “My security camera sends alerts when someone opens a door or window.”
She powered up the desktop computer and accessed her account with the security company. “The cameras also record when anyone comes onto the property. We can watch the feeds from here and finally get a look at this guy. If I’m really lucky, he looks right at a camera, and I can get a good headshot for police and local media. When did Marina say she came by?”
Derek shared the details, and Gwen brought up the day and time in question. Then they waited to see Marina’s car slide against the curb. “There she is.”
Lucas shifted over her shoulder, moving in close enough to smell his cologne and feel his warmth. “Did she say the guy was already here when she arrived?” he asked Derek. “I don’t see any other vehicles parked along the street or in the driveway.”
SVU Surveillance Page 14