Brighter Shades of Light

by Jaclyn Osborn

  His friends looked at me, and before I could register what exactly was happening, the one named Marcus stood up and jogged over to me.

  “Come sit with us, Dr. Vale,” he said. “Cody can’t stop talking about you and how much he enjoys your class.”

  Behind him, Cody stared at his drink, seeming absolutely mortified. He was the only one at the table not looking over at us.

  “I appreciate the offer, but I believe that would be inappropriate.”

  “He said you’d say that.” Marcus grinned. “Damn, the boy really knows you.”

  I cleared my throat and looked at Vance. “Thank you for tonight. I’m going to head home. It was nice meeting all of you.” I stood from the table and faced Marcus. He was a little taller than me. “Goodnight.”

  Cody and his friends were sitting near the exit, and I had to approach them in order to reach it. Saying nothing to Cody would be rude of me, but stopping and chatting would be inappropriate.

  “Hello, Mr. Miller,” I found myself saying once near his table. “I hope you’re enjoying your evening.”

  With a smile that lit up his handsome face, he said, “I am! Are you leaving already?”

  “Yes.”

  “Come on, Dr. Vale,” Marcus said, gently bumping my arm. “The night’s still young. It’s only ten-thirty.”

  My gaze locked with Cody’s again, and I almost threw all the reasons for keeping my distance aside. Almost.

  “Maybe another time,” I said. Disappointment flashed in Cody’s eyes, and I was curious as to why he felt that way. “Goodnight, Mr. Miller. I’ll see you in class bright and early Monday morning.”

  I left before I could change my mind.

  There were lines one should never cross, even if what waited for them on the other side was a warm light, illuminating the night in a soft glow.

  Chapter 10

  Cody

  “Okay,” Tristen said, pointing at me once Dr. Vale left. “You didn’t say the man was hot.”

  “You think he’s hot?” Marcus asked, snorting. “Didn’t think nerds were your type, T.”

  “They aren’t.” Tristen rolled his eyes. “But I’m not blind. I can see how attractive he is, even if I don’t want to take his clothes off and ride his dick.”

  Keith spewed his beer all over Rachel, and she slapped his arm. “Asshole!”

  “The real question is,” Tristen said, arching a brow at me, “do you want to ride his dick?”

  “I’m not answering that.” I sat back and crossed my arms over my chest.

  “So that’s a yes.” Marcus laughed and tilted his glass back, finishing his drink.

  “Don’t know if you guys noticed it or not,” Rachel chimed in, leaning forward on the table, “but Vale was totally into Cody. Did you see how he looked at him? Those green eyes didn’t leave Miller for even a second.”

  “What?” I couldn’t have heard her right. “No, he isn’t into me. He’s just…I don’t know. He’s that intense to everyone. Not just me. I’m just some guy in his class. Nothing more. He said ‘hi’ to be nice.”

  “Did you know that sometimes when you open your mouth, shit falls out?”

  The guys howled with laughter at Rachel’s remark.

  “You used to be my favorite,” I said to her before huffing in an overly dramatic fashion. “Not anymore. Keith is my new favorite because he’s actually nice.”

  “Hey, don’t bring me into this.” Keith put his hands up, his face red from laughing.

  Since I was the only one not drunk or legally impaired, I was the designated driver and got everyone back to campus safe and sound. We all walked Rachel to her building before heading toward ours. Keith and Marcus disappeared into their room after we took the elevator to our floor, and Tristen walked by my side as we moved down the hall.

  “I needed tonight,” he said, unlocking our door.

  The lamp was on in the living room, so it wasn’t pitch black when we walked in.

  “I think we all did.” I collapsed on the couch and kicked off my shoes. “I needed a pick-me-up after two failed exams.”

  “Wanna talk about it?” Tristen sat in the armchair and tucked his hands beneath his chin, elbows on his legs. He reminded me of a little kid waiting on their mom to make them a snack or something. “I know you’ve never been that great of a test taker, but bombing them isn’t like you.”

  “Just a lot on my mind.”

  “Me, you mean.” He pinned me with a knowing stare. “Ever since that day, you’ve been weird around me. And I’ve heard you scream out in the middle of the night. I’m sorry if I messed you up in the head, too.”

  I didn’t say anything.

  “Don’t worry about me, Cody,” he said, scrubbing his hands over his face. “Really. I’m…I’m figuring out my shit.”

  “Have you made up your mind yet? About…you know.”

  Almost two weeks had passed since his panic attack during the paintball match. He’d been quiet about whether he was going to leave the NROTC program or stay. I’d given him space, but I felt like he was finally ready to talk about it.

  “I think so. It’s scary to think about being in that kind of situation someday—loaded gun in hand and knowing you might have to kill someone. It’s scary to think that you or your best friend could be that someone who dies.” He peered up at me. “But, like you said, it’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make. I want to stay. I want to serve my country. Fight for it. Because if I can’t, how in the hell can I expect you or Marcus or Rachel to do it in my place? I joined the program because I wanted to make a difference and join the good fight. Dying is scary, but not living is even worse.”

  I released the breath I’d been holding and went over to give him a hug.

  “Being scared is normal,” I said, wrapping my arms around him. He held me a bit tighter, burying his face in my neck. “I’d be worried if you weren’t. But that’s all tomorrow’s problem. It’s good to be prepared, yeah, but we still have a while before that’s even on the table for us.”

  “I should get to bed,” Tristen said, standing. He stumbled a bit, and I caught him against my chest. “The room is spinning.”

  “Vodka does that to you.”

  He smirked. “You do that to me.”

  “Huh?”

  “Never mind.” Tristen laughed and walked down the hall, only hitting the walls a little as he searched for his bedroom.

  I checked to make sure he made it okay before brushing my teeth and sliding into bed. As my brain picked that moment to rev up and go ninety-to-nothing, I knew sleep was out of the question. Too much was on my mind.

  October was only days away. The semester was flying by. One day I’d been making a fool out of myself in the professors’ lounge in front of Dr. Vale, and in the blink of an eye, I was sitting in a bar, catching him looking at me all night as he drank beer with the other instructors and ignored the woman pining for his attention.

  When I’d seen the woman with him, it stirred up my jealous side a bit. Okay, more than a bit. I’d wanted the chick thrown out of the bar. But then I noticed him noticing me, saw him looking at me instead her.

  Had Rachel been right?

  Was Dr. Vale into me?

  Up until that point, our conversations had been mostly limited to the course work. But you could be into someone without knowing them well. Hell, I’d pursued guys before based off their looks alone. Sure, they had turned out to be assholes, but it proved my point.

  Attraction was like the spark from a lighter that then turned into a flame.

  Dr. Vale was my spark.

  Was I his?

  Only one way to find out.

  It was past midnight, but if I didn’t do it now, I’d lose my nerve. I hopped out of bed and grabbed my laptop before snuggling back under the covers. School emails were probably monitored, so I wouldn’t say anything that could come back and bite me in the ass. But I was tired of this weird dance between me and Dr. Vale. He didn’t seem like the type of guy to ev
er make a move, so I did it for him.

  Dr. Vale,

  You said in class that if I was interested in any help to let you know. Would it be possible to stop by your office once I’m done with classes on Tuesday for tutoring? Monday, Wednesday, and Fridays are usually swamped, so Tuesday or Thursday would be perfect. If not, I totally understand.

  -Cody Miller

  After hitting send, I opened a new tab on my laptop. If I couldn’t sleep, I might as well watch something. As I was scrolling through Netflix, I got a notification and clicked back to the email tab. He’d responded in less than two minutes. I didn’t know what surprised me more, his quick response or that he was still awake at almost one in the morning.

  Mr. Miller,

  Tutoring on Tuesday would work for me, as well. I’ll be in the lab from 1 to 2:30, so any time after that would be ideal.

  -Dr. Vale

  Yeah, I was crushing on him hard. He seemed like he was made of ice, but I’d gotten glimpses of what I believed was the real him. It was only a matter of hacking away at the ice and finding him beneath it all.

  Dr. Vale,

  That works out great. My last class ends at 2, so I’ll be there at 3. Can’t wait!

  -Cody Miller

  The rest of my weekend was great. I spent Saturday with Rachel as she dragged me to the mall and searched for clothes. I didn’t have money to buy anything, but it was fun spending the time with her. She found a pair of leggings with pumpkins on them and nearly deafened me as she squealed about them. It was cute how she could be so serious and focused during training and then let her girly-girl side show.

  Sunday was mostly a study day. I couldn’t afford to make another bad grade in any of my classes. I wore my emotions on my sleeves, and knowing how upset Tristen had been had affected me more than I should’ve let it.

  But I was ready to get back on track. Starting with tutoring.

  Tuesday afternoon, I left my Amphibious Warfare class—a required naval science course for the NROTC—and walked toward the math and science building to meet Dr. Vale for our session. I’d had butterflies in my stomach the whole time he lectured yesterday morning, much like I did right then as I walked down the hall toward his office.

  Nothing could happen between us. I mean, he was my professor. But I couldn’t ignore the urge to at least try. Some of that came from my time admiring his work, but the majority of it came from me just wanting to know him.

  A man had never had such a hold on me before. I got bored with guys easily because none of them were able to keep me interested longer than a hot hookup or two. Dr. Vale was different. I couldn’t stop thinking about him.

  “Good afternoon!” Professor Johnson, my Calculus Based Physics instructor, greeted me. He was a friendly guy but tried too hard to be best buds with his students. He’d been with Dr. Vale at the bar Friday night and had asked us if we wanted to do shots before he left with his group. Weird.

  “Afternoon.”

  “You on your way to see Seb? Er, I mean, Dr. Vale?”

  “Yes, sir.”

  “Well, don’t let me keep you.” He popped his suspenders and strolled off, stopping another student halfway down the hall to say hi.

  Dr. Vale’s office was at the end of the hall on the left. I passed a water fountain, another teacher’s office, and a sitting area. There was a Coke machine, one for water, and a vending machine filled with chips and candy bars. Then, I was at his closed door, my heart thumping harder.

  It’s only tutoring.

  I really did need the help. A lot of the material I got wrong on the exam was because of lack of focus, but some of it had been confusing, too.

  I didn’t know why I was nervous. It wasn’t like I was going to bust down his door, grab him by his sweater, shove him against his desk, and devour his sexy mouth.

  Fuck, that’d be hot, though.

  Right as I lifted my hand to knock, the door opened. Dr. Vale stood on the other side, looking like he hadn’t had a decent night’s sleep in way too long. Blond hair stuck out around his face, untamed and sexy, and his green eyes pierced me.

  “Good afternoon, Mr. Miller. Come in.”

  I stepped into the room and he closed the door behind me. His office was tidy, filled with books and small knickknacks that looked like they’d come from an antique store. No clutter, though. Everything looked to have a place, carefully positioned instead of just thrown somewhere.

  “Please have a seat.” He motioned to the chair in front of his desk and walked around to sit in his own chair. “Now, what is it you need help with? Entropy? That seemed to be the section you struggled with most on the exam.”

  “Uh, yeah.” My voice was croaky, and I cleared my throat. “I mean, yes. That’s a great place to start.”

  “Very well.” He slid over a notebook and flipped the page before lifting those gorgeous eyes back to me. “Entropy, as a reminder, is the measure of molecular disorder of a system.”

  “So it’s a measure of uncertainty.”

  “Precisely.” He nodded. “It can be calculated using several different equations. Would you like me to go over them?”

  I’d prefer for you to bend me over your desk.

  “Yeah, that’d be a lot of help.”

  He explained the formulas, stopping every so often to make sure I was following, and I was. But I was also following the movement of his lips when he spoke, imagining what they’d feel like on mine.

  Did he kiss softly, easing into it before adding tongue? Or did he kiss hard, grabbing his partner by the nape as he took their breath away, invading their mouth before invading their willing body?

  “You still with me, Mr. Miller?”

  “Huh?” I blinked, and the fantasy of kissing my professor flew away, along with my morals. “Yeah, I’m good. You said the entropy of a solid is less than the entropy of a gas, right? Because with a solid, the particles aren’t free to move around, so the uncertainty is lower.”

  “Mhm.”

  His gaze was unwavering, a seemingly blank expression. I wondered what was going on in that head of his. It was almost as if he was trying to mentally calculate something. Trying to figure me out. Finally, he blinked, and the weight of his stare was lifted.

  “We’ve been at this for an hour,” Dr. Vale said after checking his watch. “Shall we stop for the day and pick it back up on Thursday?”

  I wasn’t ready for the time with him to be over.

  “Yeah, sounds great.” I stood when he did, my head buzzing. He began walking toward the closed door, and my hands shook the closer he got. When he reached it, it would be over. The chance to make a move would go with it. “Um, Dr. Vale?”

  “Yes?” He turned to me, standing not even a foot away. Maybe I was wrong, but I could’ve sworn he stared at my mouth a moment before looking into my eyes. “Is there something else I can do for you, Mr. Miller?”

  Many things, if I’m being honest. Kiss me. Fuck me.

  “Um. I was just. Uh,” I stammered, rubbing the back of my head as my heart beat so hard it was a miracle it didn’t bust through my chest. “Do you want to grab coffee? Like right now?”

  Smooth, Cody. Real smooth.

  “Coffee,” Dr. Vale repeated, emotionless.

  “Yeah?”

  He only stared.

  So, I started blabbing like I always did when I got nervous. “I know you’ll say it’s inappropriate and unprofessional, but I want to repay you for your time and—”

  “Actually, coffee sounds lovely.”

  “Huh?” There I was, about to lay out all the reasons why it wouldn’t be inappropriate. Hell, I’d been ready to draw a damn diagram and make a bullet point list. And he agreed just like that. “Really?”

  “Yes.” Although faint, there was a small smile in the corner of his mouth. “Consider it the start of the interview process.”

  “Interview?” I shoved the thermodynamics textbook back into my backpack and zipped it before slinging it over my shoulder. “For what?�
��

  “I’ve decided to humor the idea of a teacher’s assistant for next semester,” he responded in a cool tone. “Someone to help me grade papers and assist in my lab on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Do you think it’s something you’d be interested in?”

  “For next semester?” I was a little swamped this semester and wanted to verify.

  “Yes.”

  “Then, yeah! I’m interested.” I laughed when something occurred to me. “Wow. Brandon Powel’s gonna be pissed if I get the job and he doesn’t. He’s wanted it since day one.”

  “Oh, don’t misunderstand me, Mr. Miller.” Dr. Vale stepped closer, stopping close enough that I felt the heat come off his body, making mine tingle in response. “There’ll be a very thorough interview process. If chosen, we’ll be spending a lot of time together, so I need to be sure we fit together. For work, that is.”

  I swallowed, unable to look away from his stare.

  There was no mistaking the innuendo in his statement.

  “Guess I better be on my best behavior then,” I said, inwardly cringing at the way my voice squeaked. “Should I change into a suit before we get coffee? Since it’s an interview and all.”

  I was just joking, but I didn’t know if my nerves ruined the effect.

  Dr. Vale’s lips twitched. “What you’re wearing is fine.”

  “Good.” I blew out a breath. “’Cause I don’t own a suit.”

  The smile he’d worked so hard to keep back finally surfaced, and damn if it wasn’t the sexiest thing I’d seen all day.

  He opened the door. “After you.”

  “Thanks.” My stomach fluttered, and I stepped out of his office.

  Attraction. A spark.

  As we walked down the hall, I couldn’t help but feel that maybe the spark was growing into something more.

  Chapter 11

  Sebastian

  Until the moment Cody invited me for coffee, I’d had zero intentions of having a teacher’s assistant. I had meant what I told Brandon about preferring to work alone.

  But I wouldn’t let myself have coffee with a student unless there was a professional reason to do so. Therefore, I panicked after saying yes and lied about wanting a TA. Now, I was put under pressure to keep the lie going. Or to give in and actually have one. Which I didn’t want to do.