“Let me know when it is,” Henry said. “I’d like to meet the lucky young fellow. And I want to drive them.” June smiled at him. He stroked her hair. “Don’t worry, Bee. I’ll keep an eye on this boy. Who knows? If he hangs around until she’s old enough to date, he may very well be ‘the one.’”
“Ha! You know, I can’t believe we’re even talking about this. Weren’t they just in diapers?”
“They have to grow up sometime.”
“Says the man who bought his daughter a new teddy bear last week.”
“Guilty as charged.” Henry’s blue eyes twinkled in the lamplight. “So, was that it, or is there something else?”
June was silent for a moment. “Do you think I’m doing enough?”
“Enough of what?”
“Just . . . enough. Enough for you. Enough for the kids.”
“I actually think you’re doing too much.”
June frowned. “That’s what everyone keeps telling me. But there’s always more to do. More decisions to make. It doesn’t ever feel like enough. I don’t feel like enough.”
Henry slid his arms around her and pulled her close. “You don’t have to be enough. We don’t need Wonder Woman. We just need you.”
“Henry—”
“Bee, the world doesn’t fall on any one person’s shoulders. All any of us can do is our best, and have faith that the rest will turn out okay.”
“Thank you, Henry. I don’t know that I believe a word of it, but thank you.” She kissed him, and his mustache tickled her lips. “I’ll let you get back to sleep now.” She turned around and shut her lamp off. Then Henry gathered her up in his arms again, and she fell into a deep sleep.
Four
June
“No, Ellie. Just, no.”
“You need this. And I need you to come with me.”
“Neither of those statements are true.”
Ellie sighed. “Look, it will be fun. You need more fun in your life.”
“Not this kind!
“Yes, this kind. You need to get out of your comfort zone and shake things up a little. And I don’t want to walk into that jazzercise class alone!”
June twirled the phone cord anxiously. “I have too much to do. We’re starting code five this morning. Code five! I can’t lose an entire hour, especially not to go make a fool of myself jumping around in a leotard.”
“Please, June! You know I’m always looking for fun ways to exercise. I really want to try this new class out. But it’s all the way in Fairview, and I don’t know any of these people. I would feel so much better having a friend there.”
“No.”
“I’ll make it worth your while. I’ll drive. And I’ll take you out for coffee afterward.”
“Hmmm.” Squeezing into Bunny—Ellie’s pet name for her beloved powder-blue 1978 Peugeot 504—was not a selling point. Coffee, on the other hand . . .
“Coffee and pie,” Ellie said, a pleading tone in her voice. “At that place you like downtown. My treat.”
“Ellie—”
“I will help you clean.”
June stopped fiddling with the cord. “Bathrooms, too?”
“Yes, yes, whatever you need.”
“I don’t have the right clothes.”
“I bought two different outfits. I’ll lend you one.”
June closed her eyes. Ellie had been there for her so much lately. And she didn’t really have to participate if she decided not to. She could just show up and lend her friend moral support.
“Okay, Ellie. But I want two slices of pie. One to take home to Henry.”
“Done.”
“And a turkey sandwich.”
“June!”
“Sandwich, or the deal is off.”
“Fine, yes. A turkey sandwich.”
“Okay, I’ll do it. What time does the class start again?”
“Eleven. I’ll bring the outfit by your house at ten.”
June frowned, knowing that meant ten-twenty at the earliest. But then, what did she care if Ellie was late to her own class?
“All right, fine, see you then.”
“Thank you, thank you!”
June slammed the phone down and crossed her arms.
After a moment, she tilted her head, sure that she heard a faint crying noise. She followed the sound into the living room. Pinky was standing on the windowsill of the side window, howling and scratching frantically at the window pane.
“I’m so sorry, kitty,” she said, as she glared in the direction of Mr. Krantz’s house. Then she sighed and went to give her children cleaning instructions to follow while she was gone.
“Ellie, when you said ‘outfit,’ I assumed you meant something tasteful! I look like a floral Spandex nightmare!”
“June, will you please just cooperate? Dressing up in jazzercise clothes is part of the fun! And I gave you the floral one because you like that sort of thing.”
“But it’s shiny!” She looked at herself in the mirror again. The leotard was full of brightly-colored flowers with sparkly centers, and the tights were a shimmering silver. In some places the fabric hugged her so tightly that she felt exposed, while in others it gaped and bunched, as the whole thing was really made for someone taller, with a larger frame.
“Mine’s shiny, too,” Ellie said. “I think that’s the best part!” She grinned and opened up her long, dark-red embroidered wool coat to show June. Her leotard had thin, metallic rainbow stripes in a chevron pattern, and her tights were a sparkly purple. She wore rainbow leg warmers and a purple sweatband, and her blond curls spilled out of an off-center ponytail on the very top of her head.
“Well!” said June. It was all she could think of to say.
“Isn’t it fabulous? said Ellie. “I only wish I had my Polaroid camera. I can’t believe I forgot it.”
“You’re becoming a nuisance with that thing.”
“It’s a fantastic way to take pictures! No waiting for film to develop, and no crossing your fingers for days and hoping that your shots came out well. I’ve already made six photo albums of the girls, memorializing the school year so far. Polaroid is the future of photography, I’m telling you.”
June tilted her head and looked at Ellie. “You know, you can’t be present in every moment if you’re busy documenting every moment.”
“That’s true.” Ellie said sadly. “But it all goes by so fast. You blink and your kids aren’t babies anymore. I just want to capture a little of it forever, you know?”
“I do know,” said June. “But thankfully, you won’t be capturing this moment.” She yanked fruitlessly at her bunched-up tights. “Are we about ready? You don’t want to show up late and end up the center of attention when everyone stares at you.”
“Yes, that’s true! Let’s go.”
Ellie closed up her coat, and they walked through the house to the front hall closet. June’s goal was to grab her own coat and safely bury herself in it before one of her children saw her. The kids were upstairs tidying their bedrooms, so her plan had a good chance of succeeding. Still, she fretted anxiously as they walked across the open space of the living room.
They made it to the closet. June put her hand on the doorknob, then let herself relax just a little.
“Mom?”
June squeezed her eyes shut and turned around. When she finally pried her eyes open, she found Cynthia gaping at her.
“Yes? What do you want?” June drew her brows together and tried to look scary.
“What are you wearing?” Cynthia let out a short, astonished laugh, clearly unfazed.
“A leotard. What, you’ve never seen one before?”
“Not on you! Mitch! Mitch? Come see this!”
“We really have to go.” June furrowed her brow harder.
“What’s up?” Mitch strolled out of the kitchen, spoon in one hand, a yogurt container in the other.
“I see you two are taking a little break,” said June.
“We got hungry.” Mitch’s
eyes widened as soon as he looked up at her. “No way!” he said.
“Way!” said Cynthia, choking on her laughter.
“We are running late now, thank you very much,” she said. “If you two are done gawking, you can head upstairs and finish organizing your rooms.” She opened the door and pushed Ellie out. “Three pieces of pie, Ellie. Three.”
Ellie couldn’t respond; she was laughing too hard. When she finally got hold of herself, she said, “I can’t believe I forgot my camera.”
The exercise studio wasn’t very big, or very crowded. June was relieved. She was also relieved to see that, while she had expected supermodel-types in tight, revealing outfits, the small group of jazzercise enthusiasts that surrounded her included women of all shapes, sizes, and fitness levels, wearing pretty much the same thing she was, with varying degrees of success.
A tall, slender, impossibly-tan woman with thick, bleach-blond hair and a neon leopard-print leotard stepped to the front of the room. She carried a large boom box, which she set down on a small table in the corner. She slid a tape into the cassette player, then fiddled with some buttons and knobs until Olivia Newton John’s song “Physical” came pouring loudly out of the speakers.
“Welcome, ladies!” she said. “I’m Linda!” She flashed a thousand-watt smile, causing creases to form in her thick blue eyeshadow. “Thank you for joining my first-ever jazzercise class! I know most of you are novices. I’m going to make this session comfortable and easy to follow. But I’m still going to challenge you enough to get you sweating!”
June chewed her lip.
“All right, form two lines!” Linda continued. “That’s it, that’s right. Now stand an arm’s length apart. We don’t want to accidentally clock anyone in the face.”
Everyone began shifting around erratically, and somehow June found herself in the front line. Ellie stood beside her and gave her an excited smile. “This is going to be so much fun!”
June frowned at her.
Linda turned around, and June could see that the backside part of her leotard was just a thin strip of fabric that wedged into places she didn’t really care to think about. She tried to focus instead on the woman’s hands, which were waving in the air.
“All right, first let’s find our rhythm!” Linda said. She began clapping high above her head to the beat of the music. “Okay, now, step to the left. Then right. Then left. Then right. Get those feet going and those derrieres in gear. Move, ladies, move!”
The next forty minutes or so featured a hodge-podge of simple, yet rapidly shifting dance sequences, punctuated with Linda’s exuberant instructions and wacky motivational phrases.
June fell into rhythm quickly, and within a few minutes she was following Linda’s every move with ease. She forgot all about her floral leotard, and Ellie’s pushiness, and Linda’s silly, trilling voice, and just enjoyed feeling loose and free as she moved seamlessly with the music.
She glanced over to see Ellie flailing wildly as she tried to keep up, and staring at her incredulously. June laughed and kept going, not wanting to miss a beat.
When the class was over, everyone applauded.
“Great job, guys! Come back twice a week—you’ll be fit and trim in no time! And let’s give an extra hand to this lady in the flowered leotard. Well done for a first try!”
Everyone clapped and murmured as they turned to June. Her cheeks burned, but she couldn’t keep the smile off her face.
Ellie turned to her, her eyes wide, her face alight with a thousand questions. “How on Earth?” she spat out, as she caught her breath.
June grinned. “I was a dancer.”
“What?”
“Lunch first. Information later.”
Five
Ellie
It was very warm inside the restaurant, but June kept her coat on, clutching at the front like it was a life raft keeping her afloat.
“I studied dance for ten years,” she said, between bites of her turkey sandwich. “I actually danced competitively in my teens and early twenties. In fact, I met Henry at a dance competition.”
Ellie stared at her in amazement. “When you told me you met him at a dance, I assumed you meant a school dance, or a party!”
June smiled wryly. “I may have left some details out.”
“So, was Henry just a spectator? Or was he a dancer, too?”
“He was a dancer, believe it or not. He and his partner won first place that night. My partner and I won second place. I was less than happy. In fact, I was even pretty rude to him. In all fairness, his partner—Janet, I think her name was—was rude to me first. Literally sneered at me and said I might not be very talented, but at least I was “a cute little thing.”
“Yikes.”
“I thought they were a couple, so I assumed he shared her low opinion of me. I had some choice words for them both. But he came up to me later and apologized for her behavior. Said he couldn’t stand her, but her parents were friends of his parents, and they had all insisted they dance together. Then he asked me on a date.”
“And you said yes.”
“Well, he was so pitiful and sweet. And he was an excellent dancer. How could I say no?” June smiled, almost to herself. “And when I got to know him, he was just so much fun, and so full of life. And so absolutely determined to win me over.” She sighed.
“Do you ever dance anymore?”
“No, not really. We did a few competitions and went out to different dance clubs in the city when we were first married. But soon there were kids, and bills, and everything else to worry about. I tried to get Cynthia interested in dance when she was little, but she preferred having her nose in a book. And she wasn’t . . . exactly . . . talented, anyway.” June shrugged. “Two left feet. Heaven knows why.”
“I can’t believe I’m just now hearing all this for the first time,” said Ellie. “Is there anything else you’re keeping from me?”
“Hmmm. I rode horses competitively for a while. I speak a passable amount of French. And I can play the piano, and the flute.”
“No kidding!”
A flicker of sadness crossed June’s face. “Yes. My father adamantly believed that children should be well-rounded, disciplined, and cultured. He also believed that busy children stayed out of trouble. We had to learn two instruments and one foreign language, and choose two competitive disciplines. The boys did archery, and the girls either did gymnastics or dance. We all did horseback riding and show jumping.”
“That’s a lot for a kid to handle.”
June nodded. “He expected us to have excellent grades, too. There was almost no time for relaxing, or fun, or individual pursuits. Family meals were even scheduled, orderly events.”
“Sounds like a nightmare!”
June cocked her head. “It was all we knew. My father meant well. And I’m grateful, because I learned poise, discipline, and determination. It felt great to work hard at something and then win. I’m glad I experienced it.”
Ellie smiled wistfully. June really was a trooper. A soldier at heart. “You never wish things were different?”
“I do sometimes wish I had had more say in what I learned, and more time to pursue things I truly loved doing. I wish I had a more normal childhood, where I chased fireflies and played with friends all summer, instead of training all day, every day. And I wish my father had invested less of himself in our education, and more of himself in being a father.”
“I’m so sorry,” said Ellie.
June shrugged. “What’s done is done. He was a difficult man sometimes, and I do regret the time we lost because of that. When he died, I still felt like I never really knew him. But I did have my mother. She was warm, and funny, and always present. She somehow found time to teach me how to cook, and bake, and garden. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoyed riding. I enjoyed dancing. But once I stopped doing those things, I never looked back with any sense of loss or regret. The things my mother taught me, though . . . those have stayed with me.”
&nb
sp; Ellie nodded. “That makes perfect sense. So, what about piano? I always thought it would be fun to learn to play piano.”
“I hated piano. The endless repetition, the cramped fingers, the mean teachers.”
Ellie laughed. “Okay, then. Scratch that idea.” She looked at her friend thoughtfully, with a new understanding and a little bit of an ache in her heart. “I’m curious . . . what did your father think of Henry?”
June laughed. “Not much. He had a very different type of man in mind for me. He didn’t live to see us get married, but I am sure he wouldn’t have approved. I’m also sure he’d be scandalized if he saw how we were raising our children. I can hear him now. ‘So indulged. So undisciplined.’”
Ellie raised an eyebrow and choked down an incredulous laugh. “June, I hope you know your children are neither of those things.”
June looked away. “No?’ she said softly.
“No. They have love and firm guidance. They’re content. And they adore you. Who could ask for more than that?” June smiled, sniffling. Ellie winked at her. “Just don’t ever make them learn to play piano.”
“No danger there!”
Six
June
Ellie and June pulled up the curb in front of June’s house, and Bunny puttered to a stop.
“Okay, Junie,” Ellie said, with a sad, sympathetic look that made June wish she’d never told her anything about her childhood. “I’ll go home and get changed, and I’ll be back to help you clean like I promised.”
“What about the girls?” June asked.
“They’re at my mom’s today, helping her craft ornaments for her tree. They do it every year. This year she bought a Bedazzler. A deluxe model, no less.”
June smiled and shook her head. Then she unbuckled her seatbelt and opened the creaky car door. “All right, I’ll see what my kids are up to, and get changed myself.” She moved to step out of the car.
Merrily Yours : An 80s Christmas Novella Page 3