by Maya Banks
“Right now it’s the only way she’s breathing,” the nurse said gently. “If she starts to come around, we can remove it. But we need to find out what she took and how much.”
Jace closed his eyes as tears ran freely down his cheeks.
“Baby, please,” he choked out. “Wake up and talk to me. You have to come back to me, Bethany. I’m lost without you.”
He pressed his forehead to hers and his tears seeped onto her skin.
“Please come back to me. I love you. We can work this out, baby. Just please open your eyes for me. I’m begging you. Don’t leave me. For God’s sake, don’t leave me.”
As he pulled back, her eyelids fluttered sluggishly. He could tell how hard it was for her to even open her eyes. And then he saw the brilliant blue and the constricted, pinpoint pupils. She was clearly disoriented and then panic surged into her eyes.
Joy flooded into Jace and he turned excitedly to tell the nurse, but they were already moving in, monitoring her vitals before taking the tube out. Bethany struggled, panicking and gagging. Jace gripped her hand and squeezed until he was sure he was hurting her.
“Don’t fight it, baby. Just give them a few minutes. It’ll be over soon, I swear it. They had to put a tube in to help you breathe.”
Tears filled her eyes and they widened and then focused on him.
“That’s it, baby. Just focus on me. Look at me and breathe. Just breathe for me,” he said brokenly.
A few minutes later when the tube was gone, Jace had to step back long enough for them to ensure Bethany could breathe on her own. They placed an oxygen cannula in her nostrils to replace the rebreather bag that had accompanied the tube in her chest. And then finally they stepped back to allow Jace access once more.
Bethany struggled to keep her eyes open. He could see the strain it caused her. Several times she blinked sluggishly as if she’d slip back into unconsciousness but he surged forward, demanding that she stay awake and stay with him.
“Jace?” she whispered, her voice nearly gone.
“Yes, baby, I’m here.”
He took her hand and put his face close to her so she could see him and feel him.
She weakly raised one hand, touching his damp cheek where his tears had been and she frowned.
“I don’t understand. What happened?” she whispered.
Confusion was heavy in her eyes and she glanced rapidly around, taking in the hospital environment and all the medical staff in her room.
“Baby, you overdosed,” Jace said gently. “We need to know what you took and how much so they can help you. You have to fight, Bethany. I can’t—won’t—give up on you or us. Whatever happened, we can fix it. I love you. We can get past this, I swear it. It doesn’t matter to me. Whatever happened, why you did it, it doesn’t matter. You’re the only thing that matters.”
Her eyes widened and she struggled against the sluggishness of her lids. Her mouth opened and she tried to speak. She closed her lips and then reached for him, urgent, frantic.
“Jace . . .”
“What, baby? Talk to me. Fight this. Please, for me. For us.”
“I didn’t do it,” she said fiercely. “I didn’t take anything. I wouldn’t. You have to believe me.”
He stared back at her in shock. “Baby, you passed out. You almost died. You have to tell us what happened.”
“I don’t know what happened!”
Her voice rose, hysterical. She became agitated and an alarm went off, causing one of the nurses to rush forward.
“Sir, you need to leave now,” the nurse said briskly. “She’s not getting enough oxygen and her vitals are dropping.”
He was shoved aside as the medical team crowded in. They put a mask over her face, but she fought it and them.
“Jace!”
“I’m here, baby. I’m here!”
“I didn’t do this! Please, you have to believe me,” she sobbed.
Then he was shoved more firmly from the room. Gabe and Ash were there to pull him back the minute he was forced out.
The door was shut firmly in his face and he turned, putting his fist into the wall.
Gabe and Ash grabbed him, subduing him before he could punch the wall again. They forced his back against the wall he’d just punched and Gabe got into his face.
“Cool it, man. You have to keep calm.”
Jace shrugged them off and stalked back to the waiting room, where Kaden still stood.
“Where is Kingston?” Jace snarled.
Kaden’s eyes darkened. “I don’t know. I didn’t give a fuck about him when I saw Bethany on the floor. My sole concern was her. We loaded her into the ambulance and left. He was still at the apartment.”
“You go find him and you bring him here,” Jace roared. “I don’t give a fuck what you have to do. You get him here now.”
“I’m on it. I’ll call Trevor. He was on his way over after I called. I’ll make sure he sits on Kingston until I get there.”
“You do that,” Jace said tersely.
Kaden walked briskly away and Jace turned to see Gabe and Ash standing there, confusion in their eyes.
“What the fuck was that about, man?” Ash queried.
Jace was seething with fury. His fingers curled and uncurled as he tried to gain control of his rage.
“Bethany says she didn’t do it. She didn’t take anything.”
Gabe’s brows furrowed. “You believe her?”
“Hell yes, I believe her!” Jace exploded. “You didn’t see her. When she came to, she was scared and confused as hell. You should have seen her face when I told her she’d overdosed. She got hysterical. Vitals tanked. They shoved me out. But she said she didn’t take anything. Didn’t know what the fuck I was talking about. She asked me what the hell happened.”
“Then what the fuck?” Ash demanded.
Jace’s nostrils flared and he sucked in deep, steadying breaths. He had to get control. He had to be strong for Bethany.
“What it means is that if she didn’t take that shit, then someone gave it to her. And Kingston was the only other person in that apartment.”
chapter forty
Jace paced the floor of the waiting room in agony, not knowing how Bethany was doing. They’d kept him from her room as they worked to rid her system of the drugs she’d ingested. He didn’t know how or why Jack had forced them on her, and he wouldn’t know until the bastard showed up. It would be a miracle if Jace didn’t kill him before he could wrest an explanation from him.
And then the gloves were off. No more would he allow this to go on. He didn’t give a fuck how upset it made Bethany, Jack was gone. Out of her life. If Jack had given her the drugs, Jace would file charges and have him arrested. He could rot in jail for all Jace cared.
Mia had rushed to the hospital the moment Gabe had called her and she kept vigil with the others. She worried incessantly over Jace’s state of mind, but she’d backed off when Gabe had murmured to her to leave her brother alone. He’d sent Gabe a grateful look. The last thing he wanted was to lash out at his sister when she was only trying to help. And he appreciated them all being here. Appreciated their unwavering support, though God only knew he didn’t deserve it after the way he’d treated them all. Especially Ash. But Ash hadn’t moved from the waiting room the entire time. He sat just as worried as the rest, fretting endlessly over Bethany’s condition.
And then Kaden came through the door, shoving Jack in front of him. Kaden held up his hand when Jace would have launched himself forward, and hustled Jack into one of the private family waiting rooms. Jace followed behind, with Ash and Gabe on his heels. They likely wanted to make sure he wasn’t going to commit murder in a public facility.
As soon as the door closed behind them, Jace slammed Jack into the wall and got into his face.
“What the fuck did you do to her, you bastard?”
Jack’s face was twisted with grief. He looked haggard. Completely wrung out. His eyes were bloodshot and he didn’t even att
empt to defend himself.
“What did you give her?” Jace snarled. “She’s in there fighting for her life and we need to know what the fuck she ingested so they can help her.”
“Narcos,” Jack said in a shaky voice. “An entire bottle. I think there were forty or so. I don’t know exactly.”
“I’ll go let them know,” Gabe said in a low voice.
“Why did you give them to her? How the fuck did you give them to her without her knowing? She would have never taken that shit.”
“It wasn’t supposed to be her,” Jack choked out. “Never supposed to be her. She took the wrong cup. It was hot chocolate. She drank the wrong one.”
“What the fuck?” Jace snarled.
“It was supposed to be me,” Jack said in a resigned voice. “I didn’t expect her to show up. She wasn’t supposed to. Had no idea you were having the place watched.”
“What the fuck are you saying? That you were going to commit suicide?”
“Yeah, that’s what I’m saying. I put the pills in the hot chocolate. I was going to leave her a note and then I was going to do it quietly.”
“You stupid fuck. You claim to care about her and you’d put her through that shit? Do you think it wouldn’t have destroyed her if you took the coward’s way out and killed yourself? That is so unbelievably selfish. Did you even stop to think what it would do to her for you to go down like that?”
“Look, I was doing you a favor,” Jack said angrily. “You should be glad that I’m out of the picture.”
“You disgust me,” Jace seethed. “Unbelievable. This isn’t about me. I don’t have to like you, but Bethany loves you and I love her. I want her happy. That’s all I care about. And you dead would not make her happy.”
Pain and regret filled Jack’s eyes. “I didn’t mean for it to happen. You have to know I’d never do anything to hurt her.”
“You fucking offered her drugs before!”
“That was different. She wouldn’t overdose on them. She never did. She only took them when she needed them. I just wanted to make sure she had what she needed.”
“She doesn’t need that shit. Ever,” Jace snapped.
“Is she going to make it?” Jack asked fearfully.
“Jace, man, you need to come,” Gabe said from the door. “She coded, man. They’re trying to get her back now.”
Jace fell to his knees, grief crushing through his heart. “No!” he roared. “No! I can’t lose her! Goddamn it, no!”
Ash looked stricken and pale. Mia was suddenly there, her arms around Jace, but he was numb. Couldn’t feel anything but overwhelming devastation. Jack stumbled back, Kaden shoving him into a nearby chair with a harsh command not to move. Gabe moved forward, his face a mask of regret and sympathy.
“No,” Jace whispered, his voice choking off in a sob.
Then he lurched to his feet, only knowing that he had to get to her. He wouldn’t let her go this way. She had to fight! For her. For him. For the both of them.
He pushed away from Mia’s restraining hold. When he got to the door, both Ash and Gabe tried to hold him back. He threw them forcibly out of his way, desperate to get to Bethany. She couldn’t die. Wouldn’t die alone surrounded by medical staff. Around people who didn’t love her the way he loved her.
He ran toward her room and pushed inside the door, ignoring the urgent commands of the nurses for him to leave.
“Bethany!” he cried, the blood leaving his face when he saw them trying to resuscitate her. “Don’t you give up!” he said fiercely. “Don’t you dare give up, baby. You fight, damn it! You fight!”
His gaze was locked on the tube they’d reinserted into her lungs. The doctor doing chest compressions. The oxygen being pumped into her body. The medication being inserted into her IV line.
But the one thing he focused on to the exclusion of all else was the flat line running across the heart monitor, only jumping with the compressions being performed.
“Don’t leave me,” he said brokenly. “Baby, please don’t leave me.”
“Sir, you have to leave,” one of the nurses said in a low voice filled with sympathy and understanding. “I know you want to be with her, but you have to let us get her back. You’re in the way here.”
“I’m not leaving her alone,” Jace said fiercely. “I need to be with her so she understands. So she knows how much I love her. I won’t let her die alone. I won’t let her die, period!”
“If you want her to live, then get the hell out so we can get her back,” one of the doctors snapped. “That’s what you can do for her. Let us do our jobs.”
“Man, come on, let them work,” Ash said quietly. “They’ll get her back. You have to believe that. Best thing you can do is to get out of their way.”
Both Ash and Gabe grabbed Jace and forcibly pushed him out of the room.
“Bethany!” Jace roared just as the door was closing. “Don’t you fucking give up! I love you, goddamn it. Fight!”
• • •
The tension in the small waiting area was through the roof. Jace sat, head in his hands, his shoulders slumped. He’d replayed every single memory of Bethany in his mind. From the time he’d seen her across the room at Mia’s engagement party. Every smile. Every laugh. Every time they’d made love. When he’d put the choker around her neck the second time. The night she’d been drunk and so damn cute and the way she’d lustily made love to him. And the pain and sorrow in her eyes the night before when he’d hurt her unforgivably.
“Jace.”
He glanced up to see Mia sitting beside him. She wrapped her arms around him and hugged tightly.
“She’ll be okay. She’s strong. She’s defeated insurmountable odds. No way she’ll go down over this.”
Jace crushed her to him, holding on just as tightly. He buried his face in her hair and just held on. He was losing his grip on his sanity. He was slowly breaking. With every minute that passed with no word, he died a little more himself.
“I can’t lose her, Mia. I can’t lose her.”
“You won’t,” Mia said fiercely. “She’s stronger than that, Jace. She’ll make it.”
Jace lifted his head and over Mia’s shoulder, his gaze locked on to Jack, who sat in the corner, face buried in his hands. Anger crushed through him all over again. It took all his restraint not to go over and take him apart with his bare hands. He was furious that Jack could have been so careless with Bethany. It didn’t matter that Jack hadn’t intended to hurt her. It had happened and now he could lose her. If that happened, Jace wouldn’t rest until Jack paid for what he’d done.
“Love you, baby girl,” Jace whispered against Mia’s hair. “Thank you for being here and for believing in Bethany.”
“I love you too, Jace.” Her voice was filled with sorrow. “I love Bethany. She’s perfect for you and you’re perfect for her.”
“Not perfect for her,” he said in a muffled voice. “I’ve done so much wrong, Mia. I’m gutted by all I’ve done wrong with her. If she pulls through this, I just pray she’ll forgive me.”
“Honey, listen to me,” Mia said, pulling away. She put her hand to his face and cupped his jaw. Her eyes were so full of love and understanding. “We all make mistakes. Look at the mistakes Gabe made. I was so furious with him. I was devastated when he pushed me away. I’ve never hurt like that in my life. You know that. You saw me. You and Ash took me away at Thanksgiving and you saw how I was that whole time. But you know what? He made it right. And no matter what he did, it didn’t change the fact that I loved him. I may have been hurt and angry, but it didn’t mean that I didn’t love him. She loves you,” Mia said softly. “And that didn’t change because you hurt her. You’ll get the chance to make it right, Jace. You have to believe that. It’s what she needs right now more than anything. Faith. We have to believe that she’s going to pull through this, and you need to believe in your love.”
“Thank you,” Jace breathed. “You’re right. I know you’re right. She’s going to mak
e it. She’s a fighter. She’s damn sure not a quitter or she would have quit long before now. And I’m going to be right there with her every step of the way. I’m not giving up, just like she won’t give up.”
Mia smiled and then leaned forward to kiss his cheek. “I like you in love, Jace. She’s good for you. I’m glad you’ve found that special someone. You deserve it for all the years you sacrificed to take care of me.”
Jace caught her hand and held it between them, anchoring himself in family and the unconditional love surrounding him. “It was never a sacrifice, Mia. I don’t have any regrets. I was waiting my entire life for her and now I’ve found her. I’m just glad we’re both happy now and have a very bright future to look forward to. Can’t wait for you to give me nieces and nephews to spoil shamelessly. I can’t wait for my own children to do the same with.”
Mia’s smile was breathtaking, lighting up her entire face. “That’s a wonderful thought, isn’t it? Us building families together. One big family.”
“Yeah, it is,” Jace returned softly.
“Mr. Crestwell?”
Jace whirled to see a doctor standing in the doorway.
“You can come back and stay with her now if you like.”
Jace surged to his feet, fearing the answer to his next question. “Is she okay? Did she . . . make it?”
The doctor’s expression was relieved but grim. “We got her back and we managed to get most of the drugs from her system. She’s resting comfortably now. She probably won’t come around for a while, but you can sit with her if you like.”
There was no question. He would stay with her until she woke again and he’d never leave her side.
Before he left, he turned his hard gaze on Kaden and then nodded in Jack’s direction. “You make sure he doesn’t go anywhere. I haven’t yet decided what’s to be done about him.”
“Yes, sir.”
Jace hurried back to Bethany’s room. It was much quieter than before. His breath caught in his throat when he walked through the door and saw her on the bed, lying so pale and still.
He took a seat by her bedside, pulling the chair so he was right next to her head. She looked extremely fragile, like a porcelain doll, so still and quiet. He reached up to tuck a strand of hair away from her cheek and let his fingers trail down her skin.
The only sound was the heart monitor and the steady rhythm of her heart. She still wore a cannula, which fed oxygen into her nostrils. Other than that, she didn’t stir. Her breaths were so light that he leaned forward to reassure himself she was still breathing.
He pressed his lips to her forehead, closing his eyes as he savored the reassuring sound of the heart monitor. She was alive. She was breathing. Her heart beat. It was enough. No matter what happened from here on out, it would always be enough that she was alive and in his life.
“Come back to me, Bethany,” he whispered. “I love you so much.”
chapter forty-one
Bethany’s dreams were tormented. Or maybe she was awake, but she couldn’t seem to make her eyes open. But she’d had the most horrible dream that she’d been in a hospital and Jace had been standing over her, fear blazing in his eyes. And then he’d told her that she’d overdosed. That she’d taken drugs and tried to kill herself!
Her heart hurt. Did he really think she could do something like that? And why couldn’t she seem to wake up so the horrible dream would go away?
She wanted Jace. Wanted him to hold her and to soothe the horrible ache in her chest. To tell her he’d never believe something so terrible of her. But then, he didn’t trust her yet. The other night had taught her as much.