Falling For Ryan: Part One

by Tracy Lorraine

  After we say goodbye, I decide to see if I can get my sisters on a group chat. We were always really close growing up and, I hate to admit it, but I miss them being so far away. To my surprise, they both answer my call. Neither came home from university this summer, much to my parents’ disappointment. Abbi has stayed in the flat she shares with her mate and is working with kids at a summer school. Liv has moved out of halls and into a flat with her mates and landed herself a summer job at a local newspaper.

  They don’t have quite the reaction to my bruised face as Mum did, but they’re still concerned. After I finish telling the story again, both of them have soppy looks on their faces as they stare into the camera.

  “What’s wrong with you two?” I ask them, confused.

  “You love her,” they say in unison, smiling dopily at me.

  “Yeah, of course. She’s my best friend,” I say, a bit taken aback.

  We spend the next hour chatting about our lives—that is, until I hear the front door close, signalling Molly’s return. I quickly make my excuses and say my goodbyes to my sisters.

  “Hey,” I say as she rounds the corner into the room, carrying a couple of shopping bags.

  “How are you feeling? Hangover gone now?” she smirks, placing the bags on the counter and pulling out the contents.

  “Yeah, fine now, thanks.” My brows draw together at the sudden tension between us. I feel like I’ve missed something.

  “Good. I bought ingredients for a carbonara, if that’s okay with you?”

  “As long as you’re cooking, Molls, anything is good with me.”

  She laughs and turns to get started. “So, what have you been up to?” she asks over her shoulder.

  “Not much. Been to the gym and just talked with my family.”

  “Oh God,” she groans. “I bet your mum loved the look of your face. Please tell me you didn’t tell her it was because of me? She already hates me.”

  “She doesn’t hate you, Molly.” I’m not sure if that’s a lie or not. “I gave her a diluted version of what happened. She understood.”

  “Yeah, whatever you say, Ry,” she says, shaking her head, “How are Abbi and Liv?”

  “Both good. They’re working hard. I think they’re secretly glad they didn’t go home this summer. I told them they should come visit. I hope that’s okay.”

  “Of course, it is. It’s been ages since I’ve seen them. And unlike your parents, they actually like me.”

  Molly continues with dinner while I set the table and pour us both drinks. I sit down and take a sip just as she’s plating up.

  “Here you go,” she says, placing it in front of me.

  “Smells amazing, as always. Thank you.” Grabbing my knife and fork, I immediately dig in. “So, what have you been doing the last two days?” I ask, curious.

  “Well, after I left you yesterday, I went to the office to get a list together for what I need, then I met Megan for coffee. We ended up spending the whole night chatting.”

  “You spent nearly all day Saturday with her. What the hell did you have to talk about for so long?” Her answer is just to lift her eyebrow at me. I feel my cheeks flush a little, knowing I was their topic of conversation. God, I hope she’s come to the same conclusion as me.

  “Then, this morning, I got up early to ask my old lecturer if he could give me any names for a potential new employee.”

  “Did he have any ideas?”

  “He gave me a number for a guy who graduated last year. Apparently, our styles would complement each other well.”

  “Have you spoken to him?”

  “I rang him as soon as I left campus. I’m meeting him at Cocoa’s in the morning. “

  “That’s great. I hope he’s as good as your lecturer has made him out to be.”

  I watch as Molly nervously shifts in her seat, looking at me then back down again, like she’s building up to saying something.

  “Spit it out, Molls.”

  “I’vegotadateonfridaynight,” she says at such a speed it takes me a few seconds to decipher what she just said. My heart drops and my mouth opens in surprise.

  “What?”

  “Megan has set me up with one of James’ work mates. His name is Adam, and he’s taking me to that new Italian place in town.”

  “That’s good, Molly. You need to try to find your Prince Charming,” I just about manage to get out through gritted teeth.

  Molly chats away to me some more after that little announcement, but I don’t hear any of what she says. I just keep replaying what she said in my head.

  I’vegotadateonfridaynight. I’vegotadateonfridaynight. I’vegotadateonfridaynight.

  Molly

  Ryan makes his excuses after we finish dinner, and he disappears up to his room with disappointment clouding his eyes.

  “Shit,” I whisper to myself. He looked like a little kid who had just had his new puppy taken away from him. I feel awful. I didn’t want to hurt him. I’d convinced myself that he would agree with my decision, but the look on his face has me thinking that wasn’t what he wanted at all.

  After going through everything I want to talk to Jackson about in the morning, I head to bed, although sleep eludes me for hours. All I can see every time I close my eyes is the look on Ryan’s face. I don’t want to be the one who puts it there.

  It feels like I’ve only been asleep for two hours when my alarm clock goes off. “Noooo…” I grumble as I lean over and hit the top of it to shut it up. Dragging my exhausted body to sit up, I wipe the sleep from my eyes before I remember why I’m up so early. I’m meeting my possible first employee. The thought of this gives my body the boost it needs.

  By nine o’clock, I’m in our booth at Cocoa’s, waiting for Jackson to arrive. I gave him a brief description of myself on the phone yesterday, so he finds me easily when he arrives.

  “Molly Carter?” he asks.

  I look up and am at a loss for words. The guy stood before me is stunning. The first thing I notice are his eyes; they’re bright green. His hair is the colour of dark chocolate, hanging long and shaggy around his face. I think it’s probably long enough to tie up. He has strong cheekbones and a square-cut jaw. I pull myself together so I can answer.

  “Yep, that’s me.”

  He sticks his arm out towards me, and I can’t help but let my eyes travel down the length of his forearm, exposed by his rolled-up shirtsleeve. It’s pure muscle with strong veins, packaged in a full sleeve of stunning tattoos. It looks like it could do some serious damage.

  I realise I’m ogling my potential employee, so I quickly stick my own hand out. “Nice to meet you, Jackson. Have a seat. What can I get you to drink?”

  While he gets comfortable, I quickly nip behind the bar and make his coffee. Lilly is working this morning so doesn’t bat an eyelid when I intrude on her.

  “Who’s that? He is seriously hot,” she asks, her eyes roaming over Jackson.

  “I’m interviewing him for a job.”

  “Shit, Molls, you wouldn’t get any work done if he was sat opposite you in the office.”

  “I know, right?”

  Jackson must hear us giggling like schoolgirls, because he looks up and smirks at us.

  “Fuck,” I mutter and make my way back to him with a slightly higher temperature and flushed cheeks.

  “Here you go, Jackson,” I say, passing his espresso over to him.

  “Please, call me Jax. Only my parents call me Jackson. It makes me think I’m in trouble.”

  “Okay, Jax it is. So, do you want to show me what you’ve got?” I nod my head towards his portfolio, but instantly flush when he smiles at me and looks down at it on his lap. “I’m dying to see your designs. I’ve heard great things.”

  “Wow, these are awesome. You’ve got some serious talent, Jax. How don’t you already have a job?” I ask, thumbing through his work.

  “I’ve had a few interviews over the last year, but my style didn’t really suit the companies, I guess,” he ans
wers with a shrug of his shoulders.

  “Well, I hope their loss is my gain.”

  “Are you serious?”

  I look up and give him a wide smile.

  We spend the next hour chatting about the company and the work we’ve done so far, and I explain about Cocoa’s and the office upstairs when he asks why I keep helping myself to coffee. I talk about Hannah, albeit briefly, and I’m thankful Jax doesn’t ask many questions about her. I get the impression that he understands. We talk money, hours, and all the other nitty gritty bits that we need to go through, and generally about ourselves. We’re going to be spending quite a bit of time together, so it’s important that we can get on.

  Eventually, I put our mugs in the dishwasher and take Jax upstairs to see the office and the work I’ve done recently, so he can get a feel for my style.

  “Wow, this place is amazing,” he says, walking around.

  “I know. After meeting you, I’m going shopping for all the equipment we’re going to need.”

  “We?” he asks, his eyebrows raised.

  “Yes, if you’re up for it. Correct me if you don’t agree, but I think we could have a good thing here. Our design styles complement each other’s well, but we have different skills to enable us to do a range of jobs, and we seem to get on well enough. So far, anyway.”

  “I’m really excited about this, Molly. I think we could have something really good.”

  “Fantastic. Well…welcome to Angel Designs, Jax Parker.” I stick my hand out to him and he grabs it, laughing, then pulls me into a tight hug. It reminds me of a Ryan hug with of all the muscle, but Jax is a smaller build. He doesn’t engulf me in quite the same way.

  “So, I don’t want to intrude on your plans, but I’m free for the rest of the day. Do you want company while you kit this place out? I’ve got a mate who works in one of the computer stores. He owes me a favour. Hopefully, he can do us a good deal.”

  “Brilliant. I’ve got a list.” I pull my notebook out of my bag and pass it to him as we head out of the office. “See if you think I’ve missed anything.”

  We have a great afternoon picking everything we need and getting it all set up in the office, ready for us to start work. I went down to Cocoa’s to grab us some lunch that we ate in our new living room. It was weird to think that this was my bedroom for so many years.

  During lunch, Jax tells me all about his girlfriend, Lucy. They’ve only been together a couple of months, but as far as he’s concerned, it was love at first sight. She moved in with him last month. It makes me smile, thinking how at odds his appearance is to his romantic heart.

  The more we get to know each other, the more I’m confident that we’ll get on really well working together. I was pleased when he started talking about his family to find out that, although they own a chain of restaurants across the country, Jax had no intention of working with them. He wanted to do his own thing, like I did. Luckily for him, his family supported his decision wholeheartedly and have been behind him all the way. I got the impression that he couldn’t wait to ring them and tell them about this job.

  Jax has to give two weeks’ notice at the bar he works at, but he’s agreed to come in during the afternoons before he starts his shifts to help me get started here and pick up some of my jobs.

  Once we say our goodbyes, I head home. I can’t wait to tell Ryan about it all, but, to my disappointment, he isn’t at home when I get there. Instead, I ring Susan and tell her everything. I can’t say I was surprised that, by the time I rang, she had already heard about Jax from Lilly.

  “I hear he’s quite the hottie,” she says with a laugh.

  “He’s not bad to look at, and his artwork is stunning. I think we’re going to make a really good team. The office looks fantastic—you should pop up when you’re next at Cocoa’s.”

  “I’m so glad you found someone so soon that you like so much.”

  “Thank you so much for what you’ve done for me. I still can’t quite believe it. It does feel like Hannah is part of it.”

  “You’re more than welcome, angel.” I can hear her start to well up. We chat for a few more minutes, until she has to go and tend to dinner.

  I feel a bit lost for what to do. I was hoping to spend the evening with Ryan, but it doesn’t look like that’s going to be happening. Instead, I grab my sketchpad, settle on the sofa with the TV on, and coming up with some concepts for my next project.

  I awake with a start at three o’clock from a loud banging on the front door. I scramble out of bed to see what’s going on, just as Ryan manages to get his key in the door and comes stumbling through into the hallway. When he sees me, he stops and stares at me. The look he gives me sends a shiver down my spine. I’ve only ever once seen such a cold look in his eyes, and that was Saturday night, right before he punched the guy who pulled me down the street.

  He sways on his feet and stumbles back so he’s leaning against the wall for support.

  “Come on, Ry. Let’s get you up to bed.” I go to grab him around the waist to help him up the stairs, but he pushes me away.

  “I don’t need you, Molly,” he growls coldly. I’m taken aback by his tone. He’s never been anything but nice, so to hear him snap at me is a real shock.

  He turns to face the stairs and starts towards them slowly. “I don’t need you.” He looks totally defeated with his head down and shoulders slumped.

  I stand there, shocked, and watch him climb his way up the stairs. Just as he disappears out of my sight, I feel a single tear run down my cheek. Confusion and hurt engulf me as I stand, staring at the empty space where he just was.

  I eventually make my way back to my room and lie back on my bed, staring at the ceiling, wondering what the hell just happened. Needless to say, I have another restless night’s sleep.

  This pattern with Ryan continues for the next three days. I get up every morning, hoping to see him before I go to the office, but he’s still in bed. Then, when I get home in the evenings, he’s already gone out.

  I’ve texted him a few times but had no response and, when I ring his phone, it goes straight to voicemail.

  By the time I get in from work on Friday night to get ready for my date, I’m surprised to find Ryan sat on the sofa, surrounded by empty beer cans and looking a little worse for wear. I really wish I’d had time to talk to him about what’s going on, but I’ve only got an hour before I need to head out to meet Adam.

  Chapter Twelve

  Ryan

  This week has been shit—total shit. Ever since Molly told me about her date, I’ve been a complete mess, and I can’t seem to sort myself out. The only thing that has helped me forget is alcohol. Luckily for me, my mates from school are back and keen to keep up the party lifestyle from their holiday, so we’ve been out to different bars every night this week. I can’t honestly say I remember much of what’s happened, but it means I also don’t remember thinking or being miserable about Molly.

  Tonight is Molly’s date, and I made the stupid decision to stay home. I wanted to make sure I was here if she needed me, but at some point during the afternoon, the urge to drown everything out was too strong so I hit the beer—again. Now, I’m not going to be much good if her date goes south.

  To say she looked shocked to see me here when she came home would be an understatement. I’ve missed her so much this week, but the thought of spending time with her at the moment makes my chest hurt. I feel like a complete pussy.

  After an amount of time I’m completely unaware of, I hear her coming back up the stairs. When I look up to her, my heart clenches as I see she’s wearing the white dress she had on the evening we went out for dinner in Cornwall and ended up in the sea. A giant lump forms in my throat at the memory.

  “Well, I’m off. Have a good night, Ryan.” The look on her face when she says this is almost as dejected as I feel. She looks at her feet, then turns to walk out. Just before she gets to the door, I find my voice.

  “Molly?”

  “Y
eah?”

  “You look gorgeous. I hope he treats you well.” I even manage to crack a smile for her.

  I must have passed out on the sofa before she got home, because the next thing I know, the room is really bright, and when I open my eyes, Molly’s making a cup of tea in the kitchen.

  “Morning,” she sings cheerfully, making my head hurt.

  I just groan back at her.

  “Ry, you’re not eighteen anymore. Hangovers from week-long binges are going to last much longer than our university days.”

  I groan again, roll off the sofa onto my hands and knees, and crawl out of the room and up to my bedroom, where I collapse on my bed and fall back to sleep.

  By the time I wake up again, it’s the afternoon, and I still feel like death. I drag my arse into the shower in the hope it will wake me up, but it does very little to pull me out of the slump I’ve found myself in.

  I head down to the kitchen, hoping coffee might be more successful. I’m grabbing a mug when a note catches my eye.

  Ry,

  I’ve gone out with Megan and Oscar, then I’m having dinner tonight with Jax at The Fat Dog. Maybe lay off the beer today, huh? I’m worried about you.

  Love and hugs,

  Molly xx

  Red hot anger flows through me and the mug in my hand goes flying and smashes against the far wall of the living room.

  “Who the fuck is Jax?” I growl.

  Leaning back against the kitchen worktop, I shut my eyes and try to calm myself down. Molly swore when she moved in here that she was turning over a new leaf with men, and not using them to make herself feel cared for, but here she is, going out with two different guys on two consecutive nights. She might have ruined me at the moment, but I’m sure as hell not going to let her slip back into her old ways.