by Nicole Fox
Or is she really just that naïve? That ignorant about what’s happening in this town?
Whatever the answer, I know she was followed. I know the bikers are trying to intimidate her, and for reasons I don’t fully understand, I want to show her that I can take care of her.
That she doesn’t need to be scared with me.
Though, if she could remember everything about that night this summer, she’d be running from me right now, too.
“Come on a walk with me,” I say, climbing out of the car and walking around to her side. She clings to the door when I open it, trying to pull it closed. “Lily.”
“Finn,” she says, eyes wide. “Let’s go somewhere else.”
“Why?”
I decide right then that if she tells me the truth, I’ll get in the car and drive away. I won’t push it. If she tells me the truth about the bikers and being afraid, I won’t force her into the woods.
“Because,” she stutters, looking towards the dark park and then back to me. “Because it’s dark, and I’m cold.”
I reach into the back seat and grab a gray hoodie. “Wear this. Come on.”
She grabs the hoodie when I throw it to her, which means she has finally released her death grip on the door. I pull her out of her seat and shut the door, locking it with my fob.
Suddenly, Lily flattens her body against me, her braless breasts pressing against my chest. “Let’s go somewhere else. Somewhere private.”
I grab her hand and pull her towards the trail. She has no idea that she isn’t persuading me, but spurring me on. Now, I want to get to where we’re going even faster.
“I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but we’re alone here. It is private.”
I can feel her hesitation in every step. When we reach the break in the trees where the secluded running and hiking trail starts, her feet practically melt into the ground.
“What’s going on?” I ask, placing a hand on her lower back and pulling her along with me. “You don’t trust me?”
For the first time since we pulled into the lot, Lily smiles. “Of course not. You’re the one who told me not to.”
“And you trusted me enough to believe me when I told you not to trust me.”
She frowns and then shakes her head. “That isn’t how that works.”
“Yeah, but in the time it just took you to puzzle it out, we made it ten more steps in.”
Lily looks around suddenly, like she expects our surroundings to suddenly be horrifying, but they aren’t—just darkness and trees.
I pull out my phone to turn on the flashlight, but Lily grabs my hand and shakes her head. “Don’t. It’s better in the dark. No lights.”
Her fingers wrap around mine in a vise, and I don’t hate it—being the person who protects her. The person she turns to when she is afraid.
When the trail begins to turn, Lily goes rigid. I try to pull her along, but she is resolute this time. She isn’t going to budge.
Her eyes are squeezed closed, and her entire body is clenched, waging a fight I can’t see.
I smooth my hands down her shoulders. “What’s going on? Talk to me.”
Her lips are pressed together so hard they’re white. “It’s this place.”
“What about it?” I know. Of course I know. I wish I didn’t.
“You know,” she says, opening one eye. “You’ve known who I am since I got to Ravenlake. Everyone has. You know what happened here. Why did you bring me here?”
Why did I?
To fuck her, obviously. But I could have fucked her anywhere. We could have stayed in the parking lot of the motel. No one in that seedy place would have even looked twice.
But I didn’t. I brought her here.
Why?
I grip her arms and pull her towards me, cradling her face against my chest. “Because it’s just a place.”
She shudders against me, and I hold her tighter.
“It’s not a monster or anything that will hurt you. It’s just a table in a park next to a trail.”
I can’t be sure, but it seems like her breathing is evening out. Like she is relaxing into me.
After a few minutes, she pulls back and looks at me before looking around.
“I know you’re right,” she says, grabbing a handful of my shirt. “But I’m still not ready to be here.”
I could force her. That is what my dad would want me to do. It would be what’s best for the plan.
I could force her to have sex with me in the place where she was traumatized. She’d be horrified with herself and with me. Maybe with the whole damn town.
If that didn’t send her running, nothing would.
But I can’t bring myself to do it.
Instead, I grab my hoodie from her hands and pull it over her head. She shoves her arms through the sleeves, the cuffs bunching up around her wrists. As soon as it is on, she leans forward and hugs me again.
Her arms are around my waist, her cheek against my chest, and it feels like the most intimate thing I’ve ever done. It feels like I’ve cut myself open and set myself on display for the world to see.
No, just for Lily to see.
Though, it feels dangerously like the same thing to me right now.
34
Lily
Finn texts one evening the next week to tell me I’ll be his date to the fall formal.
I wasn’t sure if something like that would even be important to him—if he and his friends would go at all.
Then, I saw Viktor carry a bouquet and teddy bear into my English class to ask a cheerleader out.
I can’t imagine Finn doing something so elaborate for me, but I found myself holding out hope anyways.
Until I get the text.
You can get ready for the formal at my house. Be there by three.
Technically, he didn’t even ask me, but I figure I wouldn’t be getting ready for a dance at his house if I wasn’t his date. Though, I’ve learned that assuming anything with Finn is a big waste of time. He always proves me wrong.
Like he did when he took me to the trail where “It” happened.
I didn’t know what he had planned, but I could feel panic creeping in on the edges of my vision, fraying the edges of my mental stability.
Then, suddenly, Finn became my rock.
He held me and soothed me and whispered words in my ear that did more for me in one second than months of therapy.
It’s just a place.
It was so unlike anything I’d come to expect from him. Unlike anything he’d ever done before.
I thought maybe we’d reached a turning point in our relationship. Maybe this was actually becoming something. Maybe the only true thing Cora had ever told me was that, for some reason, I was different to Finn—unlike all of the girls he’d been with before.
That delusion slips away when I walk into his house, and he immediately tells me to strip.
“What?” I grip my bag tighter, still wondering if I should run.
Finn grabs my bag from my shoulder and pulls me into his house, closing the door behind me. “Take off your clothes.”
I laugh because I hope he’s kidding. I just got here, and we haven’t really spoken since the night at the park a week ago.
His dark brows rise expectantly. Waiting for me to submit. To obey.
“You’re serious?”
Finn bites his lower lip, slowly pulling it into his mouth before letting it go.
Good God, is it possible for him to do anything without oozing sensuality?
He moves towards me, his eyes the color of tropical waters, and lays a hand on my hip. His fingers push up the hem of my shirt, slipping across my skin, sending tingles through my entire body.
“Have I ever done anything to make you think I’m not serious?”
Helpless to the sway he has over me, I lean into him, my hips brushing against his. “Why?”
Finn’s hand slides over the curve of my body, moving from my waist to my chest and then higher…
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Until he seizes hold of the lock around my neck.
I’ve grown so used to the weight of it against my collarbone that I almost forget I have it on.
Finn tugs on it. “Because you’re mine, remember?”
“Is anyone here?”
He shakes his head. “It’s just you and me. All day.”
I nod, processing. The idea of stripping down in front of Finn makes me nervous, despite the fact he has seen me in much more vulnerable positions. But I’ve been nervous with Finn a lot of times, and it has never been for nothing.
Sexually, it has been amazing.
I’ve opened up in ways I didn’t expect, and I’m starting to understand that there is power in submitting. There is a freedom that can be found in submitting yourself to someone else in this way.
And I like it.
I like being bold with Finn. God knows I’ve spent enough of my life being afraid.
So, meeting his eyes, I step back and lift my arms over my head.
Finn raises a brow, his lips pinching into a bitten-back smile, and carefully pulls my shirt over my head. Then, he tugs on the denim legs of my shorts, peeling them down my legs so I can step out of them.
I think we are done, but as soon as the shorts are gone, he stands up and then spins me around by the shoulders until my back is against his chest. He flicks my bra off with two fingers and gently, finally, slides his fingers down my arms to push the straps away.
Finn’s hands replace my bra, cupping me tenderly. I lay my head back on his shoulder.
I can feel his excitement growing between us, and I roll my hips into him, earning a soft hiss.
But just as soon as I think I know what is happening, Finn’s warmth pulls away from me.
“Take off your panties,” he says while he pulls something from his back pocket.
I do as I’m told. As soon as the lacy material is on the floor, something soft hits me in the chest. I catch it before it falls and realize it’s another pair of panties.
“You bought me underwear?” I ask in surprise.
Finn nods. “Put them on.”
As I slide them on, I realize there is something built into the front. It’s a hard panel stitched between the layers of fabric. I’m about to ask what it is, but the moment the panties are on, there is a buzzing vibration.
I jolt with surprise and press into my center with my hands. “What the—”
They vibrate again, this time longer, harder.
It feels… incredible.
I squirm, confused, but when I look at Finn, he is holding a pink remote in his hand.
And a devilish smile on his face.
Vibrating panties. He bought me vibrating fucking panties.
“Why did you give me—”
My question is lost when the vibration starts up again. As the surprise fades, pleasure begins to replace it. The hum of the vibrator is gentle but relentless.
I step back and grab the back of the couch for support. It has only been a few seconds and my legs are already starting to go weak. Heat is pooling in my belly, hot and pulsing, and I can’t help but roll my hips, my body instinctively searching for the source of the pleasure.
As soon as the vibration stops, I sag against the couch and exhale. “Holy shit.”
“Do you like them?” Finn asks. He walks over and slides his hand between my legs, cupping my suddenly damp center.
I lick my lips and nod. “Yes.”
Amusement sparks in his eyes. He hits the button again.
My body clenches, freezing up from the sudden onslaught of sensation. But before my wits are entirely gone, I wrap my arms around Finn’s neck and press our bodies together.
His eyes go wide, and his mouth tips open, his lips parting in a sigh as the vibration rocks through us both.
I grind against him, arching my back to more fully connect us.
Suddenly, the vibration stops and Finn peels my arms from around his neck. He clears his throat and grabs my bag from the floor.
“Come on. We have a lot to do.”
I also thought we had a lot to do, though the second the vibration started, my list became comprised of different positions in different rooms. The dance is now the furthest thing from my mind.
When we get up to his room, Finn opens my bag and lays out everything I brought with me—my dress, a change of clothes for after the dance, including the hoodie he lent me last weekend, curling iron, my makeup bag, and a pair of high heels.
He holds the strappy black heels up on two fingers, one eyebrow raised.
“What?” I ask.
“I’ve never seen you in anything but your sneakers.”
“I’ve been practicing,” I admit, my face warming with embarrassment. I walked around the heels in the motel room for a few minutes every day to get used to them. Now, I’m a pro.
“Put them on.”
I sit on the edge of his bed, still naked except for the panties, and slip the heels on. My trembling fingers fumble over the buckles around my ankles.
“What now?”
Finn lies back on his bed, one arm curled under his head casually. “Get ready.”
“And you’re just going to lie there and watch?”
His eyes move hungrily over my bare body, and he nods. “Yep.”
And he’s telling the truth about that … mostly.
He lies on the bed, watching as I do my makeup in the vanity that definitely wasn’t in his room the last time I was here, and curl my hair.
But he never forgets about the vibrator.
Right when I’m in the middle of applying mascara, he presses the button, sending me rocketing out of the seat. I fall to the floor on all fours and groan softly as he gets me right up to the peak of coming…
Then turns it off.
I shoot him a glare, but he doesn’t seem to give a shit about that. So I just go back to my makeup, trying not to have a meltdown at the cruel tease.
He does it again in the middle of me curling my hair. That one goes on so long that I have to put the curling iron down and grip the edge of the table to keep from sliding to the floor.
When I chance a look over at him, his face is neutral. But his eyes are dark, pupils blown wide as he watches me squirm.
The sensation of the vibrations isn’t even that amazing.
More than anything, it’s the fact that Finn is in control of the remote.
The fact that he is watching as I cross my legs and open them, seeking out some relief from the punishing pleasure at my center.
The fact that he is in control of that pleasure.
And the thought that, eventually, he’ll do something about it himself.
As I finish my hair and set it with a few spritzes of spray, Finn hits the button again.
This time, I’m somewhat prepared for it, and I just barely flinch.
I do my best to stay standing upright, to keep my thighs from quivering, to keep from gasping as my body clenches tight with impending release.
“Is that not enough for you?” Finn asks, sitting up and swinging his legs over the edge of the bed.
I shrug casually, though my teeth are clenched. “It’s a fine substitute, I guess.”
Suddenly, the vibration increases. I didn’t realize the panties had different settings, but now my entire body is vibrating.
I can’t stop myself from doubling over with a gasp.
When the vibration stops, Finn is smiling.
I cross the room before he can cripple me with another vibration, before I lose my nerve, and wrap my legs around his waist, settling in his lap.
He’s surprised, I can see it in his eyes, but he hides it well. His hands grip my hips as I lean down and kiss him.
Our lips slide off one another at first, the connection sloppy, but soon, his bottom lip is between mine, and I curl my fingers in the dark, silky hair at the base of his neck.
I grind my body over his lap, making it obvious what I want.
Making it clear that I
’m tired of the substitution.
I’m ready for the real thing.
After our interaction in the park, I thought things were changing, but I can tell he is pulling away. The vibrator is a wall he is trying to build between us.
A tantalizing, toe-curling wall, but it isn’t what I want.
I want Finn.
He told me not to. He warned me against wanting him. From the very start, Finn told me that I would beg him to do dirty things for me. Is this what he meant?
Did he know that his kisses and touches would ensnare me, and that he wouldn’t deliver? Is this the punishment that he said would be worse than death?
Because right now, that doesn’t seem so far off.
I’m dying to feel him inside of me. To have the ache between my legs soothed by the ache I know is between his.
Nothing about Ravenlake Prep has made sense to me since the moment I arrived—especially not Finn or the connection between us—but the way our bodies work together has been simple from the start.
Regardless of all of the bullshit games and teasing and denying…
Our chemistry is undeniable.
I slide my hand down his broad shoulders, feeling the corded muscles of his bicep and forearm.
Then, I pluck the remote out of his unsuspecting hand.
This time, when the vibration starts, Finn is the one who jumps in surprise. He groans and leans back, bucking his hips into me.
I ride him over his jeans. I’ve been on the cusp for over an hour. My body is ready, desperate for release.
I want it to happen with him inside of me, but I’m not sure that is an option. It’s T-minus not much time at all until I implode in a gasping, shuddering mess.
I tip my head back, mouth open, and moan as my body climbs. I can hear Finn’s breathing picking up, and his hips are matching mine grind for grind.
His mouth is circling over my breast, taking me into his mouth, and the flick of his tongue is pushing me over the edge.
I squeeze my eyes closed, ready to surrender to the feeling, finally ready for the torture to end.
Seconds—milliseconds—before I shudder to release, Finn grabs my hips and pushes me off from his lap.