“M-My-My boyfriend. He-He’s—” I can’t get the words out past the giant lump in my throat and the panic crushing my chest.
“He’s being looked after by the best. You just need to stay back and give them space to do their job.”
“Is he...is he alive?”
“I don’t know anything right now, darling. I know it’s hard, but you just need to be patient. Those guys are the best, they’ll do everything they can for him, I can promise you that. Would you like me to call anyone for you?”
I think for a moment. The only person I need is in that car. A sob erupts from my throat at the thought of losing him like this.
I shake my head. “Okay. It would be really helpful if you could give me his details to pass on.”
I nod, because moving my head seems to be the only thing I’m capable of right now. “M-Mason Paine. He’s eighteen.” I rattle off my address, phone number and his mom’s name before she runs over to one of the paramedics.
Two other ambulances arrive along with a fire engine, and I sit frozen on the ground as I watch them begin to cut people from cars. It’s the most surreal experience of my life, sitting there waiting to find out if the person I love more than anything in the world is dead or alive.
“Camila, fucking hell,” Amalie’s scream fills the air but I don’t move, I can’t rip my eyes away from what’s happening in front of me. Her body falls down beside me and her arms wrap around my shoulders, but I still don’t move. I vaguely remember texting her with my location, but I did it on autopilot. I have no idea if I even gave her a reason for it. “It’s going to be okay. He’ll be okay.”
“You don’t know that. He could... he could be—”
“No, you need to think positive. He’s going to be fine.”
“But what if he’s not,” I wail, not able to process that thought. “What am I supposed to do then?” She pulls me tighter to her and I soak her shoulder with my tears.
When I eventually pull back, I find Jake looking between the two of us and the wreckage beyond with concern written all over his face. When his eyes don’t come back to us, I can’t help but see what’s caught his attention.
I’m horrified as we watch the firefighters cut the top of Mason’s car away before the paramedics rush in to tend to him.
“Oh my god,” I whimper, my hand covering my mouth as even more tears pour from my eyes.
What will I do without him?
“Where are you going?” Amalie shouts and I manage to drag my eyes away from where Mason is to see Jake talking to the police.
“They’ll be taking him to Rosehill Hospital. Let’s go there so we’re ready for him when he wakes up.” Jake talks to both of us but I refuse to look at him.
“No. No, he needs us here. I need to be here.”
“You can’t do anything right now, Cam. You need to allow them to do their jobs and be ready for what Mason’s going to need from you when he wakes up.” She must see the fear on my face. “He’ll wake up, Cami. He’ll be fine.”
“She’s right. He’s stronger than this.”
I want to scream at them to look at the wreckage in front of us, but I know they’re just trying to keep me calm. They see the devastation, they know how bad this is, they just don’t want to voice it.
“Look.” Jake points over my shoulder. “They’ve got him on a gurney. They’ll be heading to the hospital any minute and they’ll be faster than us. We need to get there now.”
“What about my car?” I look over to where I abandoned it in the middle of the road.
“I’ll go and pull it into the shoulder. You two go and get in the car. Take my cell, call his mom.” He hands it to Amalie and runs toward my car.
Amalie does as she’s told and pulls me along with her. I’m still trying to process his first statement to know what I should be doing right now.
The blue flashing lights illuminate the interior of Amalie’s car. I climb into the back, my nose pressed up against the window as I fight to see him, to see if he’s okay, but they all move too quick. One second they’re running toward the ambulance and the next they’re slamming the door and one of them is jumping in the driver’s seat.
“He’s leaving, we need to go now.”
“Jake’s coming. Try to stay calm, we’ll be there as soon as possible.”
* * *
The second Amalie brings the car to a stop, the three of us take off running. There are two ambulances already out front of the building, one of which had Mason inside it.
“We’re here for Mason Paine, he was just brought in my ambula—”
“Camila,” Nicky cries, and I turn just in time for her to collide with me and wrap her arms around my shoulders.
We hold each other for the longest time. When she eventually releases me, I find myself swept up into my parents’ arms, who are also here waiting.
“Any news?” Amalie asks.
“Nothing. Did they say anything at the scene?” I shake my head, although I have no clue if anyone’s actually addressing me.
Eventually all of us find seats and we begin the long wait to find out if he’s going to survive or if we somehow have to find a way to continue on without him.
When someone eventually walks through the double doors and heads our way, a collective gasp sounds out.
“Family of Mason Paine?” We all stand, and the doctor looks along the line of us. “Immediate family.”
Nicky and I stand forward. I don’t give a fuck what they consider immediate family. I’ll lie through my fucking back teeth if it gets me past those doors and to his side quicker.
Nicky looks to me and takes my hand. “We are.”
“Okay, follow me.”
Just before we disappear through the doors, I look back. Everyone is still on their feet, desperation on their faces. I feel for them but not enough to stop me walking through and hearing firsthand what’s happening.
“Please take a seat.” The doctor gestures into the room and we both shuffle inside and drop on to the edge of the chairs. “Mason has been very lucky—”
I don’t hear any more. Those five words repeat through my mind long after the doctor has finished explaining whatever might be wrong with him, because right now I don’t care about any of that. He’s alive and that’s all that matters. We can work through anything else as long as he’s still here.
I drop my head into my hands and sob tears of relief.
“When can we see him?” I eventually ask when the doctor finishes.
“Not yet, but it won’t be long. Someone will come and get you when he’s ready.”
I nod, although I’m far from happy with the answer. I need to see with my own two eyes that he’s going to be okay.
Silence descends around us after the doctor closes the door to give us some privacy.
“What did he actually say?” I ask Nicky after long minutes when I realize I heard nothing.
“Um… broken ribs, collapsed lung, concussion, b-broken something else… I think.” She breaks down, unable to say any more as her emotions get the better of her. Wrapping my arms around her, I hold her while she shatters. If she thought she had a wakeup call when I gave her a few home truths not so long ago, then this should really open her eyes to what’s happening around her.
“I should go and let the others know he’s going to be okay.”
She nods at me and releases my hands that she was holding for support.
The second I push the doors open, everyone runs at me. At some point they were joined by Ethan, who looks equally as distressed.
“He’s going to be okay.” I go on to explain what I can remember Nicky told me about his injuries.
Amalie and my parents hug me and I fight to keep my tears in. I need to start getting myself together and so I can be strong for him when we’re allowed to see him.
It’s another two hours before Nicky and I are allowed into his room. We follow a nurse down toward him, but my feet stop moving when I get to the door. We’ve already been war
ned that he’s under sedation because of his head injury and that his face has been cut up from the glass that shattered around him. I can’t cope with the images that have been filling my mind, let alone see the real evidence of what this has done to him.
“Camila, are you okay?” Nicky asks, turning to see where I’ve gone.
“I-I don’t know if I can do this,” I admit quietly. Watching the crash and him getting pulled from the car from a distance was one thing. But having to sit next to him while he’s unable to do anything, seeing him so vulnerable… I’m not sure I can hack it.
“Of course you can. Mason needs you right now. He needs you to be strong, he needs you to hold his hand and help him get through this.”
My chin trembles as I picture sitting vigil at his bedside for however long it is until he wakes up. The doctor said they’ll reduce his sedation tomorrow if things are moving in the right direction, but there’s no guarantee he’ll wake up that quickly.
Nicky looks between me and the door behind which her son lies, and I feel like the worst person in the world for keeping her from him.
“It’s okay, you go. I just need to catch my breath.”
“I’m not going in there without you.”
I blow out a breath. I can’t keep her from him.
Sucking in a deep breath, I take a step forward. Her arms wrap around my shoulders and she pushes the door open. She releases me the second we’re in the room and races over to Mason’s side, a sob ripping from her throat.
I’m frozen in the doorway, watching as if this is just one big nightmare and that my boyfriend, the boy I’ve loved since I was old enough to know he made my heart race, isn’t lying in a hospital bed with wires and tubes coming out of him and attached to some really scary machines.
“I know it looks scary, sweetheart, but it’s all okay. It’s just helping him. Mason is still Mason,” a nurse says softly, her eyes full of compassion. “He might be able to hear you if you talk to him. He’d love to know you’re here.”
I nod slowly and take a step toward him. My eyes stare at his sheet covered feet and slowly I make my way up his body. The sheet stops mid chest and then his body is hidden by his hospital gown. His body just looks like he’s sleeping, but then I get to his face. A small cry passes my lips as I take in the cuts, the dried blood, the stitches.
“Oh my god.” Racing toward him, I find his hand and lift it to my lips. I manage to push aside the hospital smell, and when I breathe in, it’s all Mason. He’s here. He’s going to be okay.
Dropping down to the chair behind me that the nurse pushes forward, I keep his hand clutched in mine as I drop my lips to the back, staring at his battered face.
When the doctor came back after his initial visit, the panic of not knowing if he was dead or alive had alleviated and I was able to focus when he repeated Mason’s injuries. He’s broken two ribs which had caused a punctured lung. He has a concussion from his head injury. But other than that, it was just cuts and bruises. He was very, very lucky because with the speed both of the cars were going, it could have been much worse. Hopefully if all is well, he’ll wake up once they reduce his sedation and he could be home in a week. God, I really fucking hope so. We’ve only been here a few hours and I’m already ready to get him out of here.
36
Camila
It’s been two days. Two days since I watched that car plow into the side of Mason’s. Two days since I watched him get cut from the wreckage. Two whole fucking days since I looked into his eyes, since I heard his voice, and I feel like I’m fucking dying. Every breath is a fight to drag in. Every movement is heavy, not that I’ve moved far from his side. People keep bringing me food and trying to force me to eat, but I can’t stomach it.
The doctors said he should wake up once they reduced the meds, but other than a few movements, he’s yet to do so and it’s scaring the shit out of me.
Crazy thoughts keep running through my head like, what if they got it wrong and he’s not okay? What if his concussion is worse than they think and he’s not going to remember anything, not going to remember me? The thoughts have my heart racing and the room around me starting to blur.
Everyone keeps telling me to stay positive. To trust the doctors. But as each hour passes, I find it harder and harder to do so.
“Camila, you really need to come home, baby,” Mom says softly from her spot by the window.
“I’ve already told you that I’m not leaving him.”
“Please, just let us look after you. You need a shower, you need sleep and you need a decent meal inside you.”
“I’m not leaving.” This isn’t the first conversation like this I have had with my parents, and I’m sure it won’t be the last.
“Nicky is here. If anything happens, she’ll call right away, won’t you, Nic?”
“Of course. But your mom’s right, Cam. Mason needs a better version of you than you are right now.”
Something unpleasant stirs in my stomach that I’m not what Mason needs right now. I always want to be what he needs.
With a sigh, I allow my mom to pull me from the chair I’ve turned into my home. I don’t take my eyes from Mason as she gently pulls me toward the door. I don’t want to leave him. If he wakes and I’m not here, I’ll never forgive myself.
The car ride home is in silence. I just stare out of the window, regretting that I allowed them to take me away from him. He needs me there. He needs me by his side.
“How about I run you a bath and then I’ll make your favorite dinner, sound good?”
I don’t respond, because how could anything sound good right now? Selfishly, I don’t even want to hear the words ‘he’s awake,’ because it would mean I’m not there by his side.
I robotically follow her up the stairs and sit on the edge of my bed while I listen to her run the bath. The last thing I want to do is sit in there alone with only the images of the crash and Mason’s broken body filling my mind, but I also don’t have it in me to argue right now either.
She comes back in to tell me it’s ready before pulling some clean clothes out of my closet and some underwear from my drawer. I’m grateful she’s not expecting me to think for myself and thankful to get some fresh clothes. I might not be totally with it right now, but I know I’m still in the same clothes I was wearing Friday night, and they most definitely do not smell good.
She leaves the folded-up clothes on the counter, kisses my forehead and then leaves me to it.
With a sigh, I strip down and climb into the tub. The hot water surrounds me, and where I’d usually enjoy the feeling of the soothing water relaxing me, I feel nothing. I’m numb. It’s like I left a part of myself on that road where I abandoned my car. I fear that without him waking up, I’m never going to find it again.
The silence around me is deafening, and it only makes the questions in my head louder. I’d put music on but have no idea where my phone is—not that I really want to listen to anything.
I allow myself to slide down until I’m fully submerged. I don’t resurface until my lungs burn for air, and when I do, I make quick work of washing my hair and body. When he does wake up, he deserves for me to at least look like I’ve tried.
“Camila,” my mom’s panicked shout fills the room, and I jump from the bath. Something about her tone has me moving and flicking a towel around me as fast as I can. “We need to go, Nicky just called. He’s waking up.”
Fuck, fuck, fuck. I’m not there. I told them not to make me leave. I knew it was wrong.
My legs tremble as I try to pull on a pair of leggings. My skin’s still damp and I end up crashing to the ground in a heap in my haste to get back to the hospital.
“Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m coming. Get the car started.”
Thankfully I manage to pull the rest of my clothes on slightly more efficiently, and, with sopping wet hair that’s dripping down my back and soaking my hoodie, I run to the car.
My heart threatens to pound out of my
chest and my nails dig into the leather beneath me. My legs bounce with my need to make my dad go faster, but there’s no point in me demanding him to do so. He’s the world’s most cautious driver, even in these kinds of situations. According to my mom, he even drove like Miss Daisy when she was in labor with me, a story that I’ve always found amusing until this very moment.
I’m out of the car before he’s even brought it to a stop. I hear them shouting behind me, but I don’t stop. My only focus is getting up to his room as fast as I can.
I stumble up the stairs, my legs moving faster than my body can cope with, and by the time I crash through into the ward, my muscles are burning with exertion. There’s a reason I don’t make an effort to do sports, and this is why.
The nurses look up from their station as the door crashes back against the wall, but they all stay put when they see it’s me. I’ve become part of the furniture the past two days, so they all know who I am at this point.
I race down the corridor, almost overshooting the door when I get to it. Swinging around the door frame, I come to an abrupt stop at the end of Mason’s bed.
But he’s not looking at me. His eyes are still shut.
“What happened? Mom said he woke up.” I can barely get the words out between my heaving breaths.
“He was. He moved, he squeezed my hand, he moaned. I thought it was it, it was more than we’ve got from him so far, but then he just fell back to sleep.”
“Fuck,” I bark, the realization that our wait is going to continue for longer slamming into me. I fall down into the chair at the opposite side of Mason’s bed to Nicky and take his hand in mine. “Come on, baby. Wake up for me, please,” I beg, more tears slipping down onto my cheeks. I’d have thought I’d have run out by now, but it doesn’t seem to be the case.
“I’m just going to grab a coffee,” Nicky says, dropping a kiss to Mason’s head and leaving me alone with him.
“It’s time to wake up, Mase.” I rub my thumb over his rough jaw, being careful of his cuts and bruises.
PAINE: ROSEWOOD HIGH #2 Page 27