Crush: A YA Romance Collection

by Lavinia Leigh

  What, is she stalking him? “Why are you keeping such close tabs on him?” We walk back into the cafeteria just as the bell rings.

  “I have to find out who he’s dating. Obviously, it’s someone he doesn’t want anyone to know about.”

  Is that true? Is this about more than just not wanting Tori to find out about me? I force a laugh. “So what, you think he snuck out of lunch to meet a girl? Used an empty classroom to make out in?” It’s the closest I can come to telling her the truth, and part of my sick mind actually feels better about the poor excuse for a confession.

  “I guess it was a stupid idea. He probably just went to the bathroom.”

  I nod and turn toward my locker. “Yeah, probably.”

  “See you later.”

  “See ya.” I open my locker and grab my trig book. Today is the test on unit seven. I’m not really worried. Toby’s been a great tutor. I’m bound to pull off at least a B, and that should get Mr. Rollar off my back for a while.

  As I shut my locker and turn toward class, Toby nods and winks from his own locker. This is probably stupid, but I walk over to him. He looks around, most likely trying to find Tori.

  “She already went to class.”

  “What’s up?” He shuts his locker and leans against it.

  “She’s watching you like a hawk. She saw you leave the cafeteria. So make sure you mention a stomachache or something later.”

  “A stomachache?”

  “Yeah. At first she thought you left to meet your mystery girl. Then she decided you were just in the bathroom. I figured it was best to agree with the bathroom thing.”

  He laughs. “Got it. Hey, I have to run. See you tonight.”

  That’s it? I watch him walk away. What if Tori never opens up to the idea of Toby and me hanging out? What if we have to continue not to be friends unless we’re alone? Will this ever be enough? Sneaking around and not being able to even hold his hand in school? This isn’t at all how I pictured getting together with him.

  The late bell rings, and I run into trig. Mr. Rollar gives me the evil eye and points to the clock above the door. “You’re late, Miss Daniels.”

  “I’m sorry. Locker trouble.”

  “Perhaps next time, you shouldn’t detour at Mr. Michaels’s locker.” He gives me a knowing look, and I sink into my seat.

  Why did I go talk to Toby? It was so dumb of me. Mr. Rollar saw us and announced it to the class. I need to fix this before the rumors start. Especially since this may be the first time in Lansfield High history that the rumors are actually true.

  “Um, I had a question about unit seven. I had to ask him before the test.”

  Mr. Rollar nods. “Well, then I hope you got your answer because I have to mark you late.”

  I didn’t get any answers, but I nod and take out a pencil. Mr. Rollar passes out the test papers and I dive in. I can figure out most of the problems, but a few give me a hard time. I try picturing Toby tutoring me, but that’s no help. I can’t get past his gorgeous blue eyes and full lips.

  “Having trouble, Miss Daniels?” Mr. Rollar asks, stopping at my desk. He has this annoying habit of walking around the room while we take tests. For some reason he doesn’t get how distracting it is.

  “Um, I’m trying to remember how to solve this problem here. I know I can’t use the same formula as this one.” I point to the previous problem.

  “There are a few other problems like this one later in the test. Perhaps one of them will jog your memory.” He keeps walking. Considering the problems he’s referring to are the other ones I left blank, that’s no help at all.

  There’s a knock on the door, and Toby walks in. I keep my head down, pretending to focus on my paper, but my eyes lift to his. His mouth curves up slightly.

  “Mr. Michaels, what can I do for you?” Mr. Rollar asks.

  “I have a pass for Becca Daniels. She’s needed in the guidance office.” He hands a slip to Mr. Rollar.

  “Well, she’s in the middle of a test right now. I can send her when she’s finished.”

  I know the pass is fake. It has to be. I already had my guidance meeting this semester, and there’s no other reason why I’d be called down there. So, do I finish my test or go for a secret meeting with Toby?

  I raise my hand. “Mr. Rollar, I’m finished.”

  “Very well.” He motions me forward, and I gather my bag and test paper. He glances at the blank problems and shakes his head. “Disappointing, Miss Daniels.”

  “I’m sorry, sir. My mind sort of blanked on those problems.”

  “Perhaps you need more tutoring sessions.” Mr. Rollar looks at Toby.

  Toby keeps his expression blank. “If you think that’s what she needs, I can work it into my schedule.”

  “Thanks,” I say and take the slip from Mr. Rollar. I walk out of the classroom with Toby behind me. Neither of us says a word until we’re alone in the hallway. “What’s this about?”

  “I wanted to ask you something.”

  “And you couldn’t wait until later or text me during class?”

  He looks down the hallway in both directions. We’re all alone. He steps forward and pins me against the locker. “This is more fun, don’t you think? We could get caught at any second.”

  My heart pounds, which I’m sure he feels since his chest is pressed against mine. Damn, he makes me feel so out of control—in a good way. “Speaking of getting caught, Rollar saw me at your locker. I had to tell him I was checking on something I didn’t understand about unit seven.”

  “And then you go and miss a bunch of questions on the test? Not very convincing.”

  “I know.”

  He leans forward and brushes his lips against mine. The kiss is quick, but it sends my heart into a tizzy. This is reckless, stupid. But I don’t care. “Got to go.”

  “Wait. What did you want to ask me?”

  “Ever jump out of a plane?”

  “You mean skydiving?”

  He nods. “I’m going this weekend. You should come. It’s a total rush.” He leans toward me again, but this time he kisses my neck. Shivers run through me. “Kind of like sneaking around with you,” he whispers. He pauses long enough to smile at me before taking off down the hall.

  A rush. He’s right. I’ve never felt so alive.

  Chapter 12

  “What do you mean you have to double your tutoring time?” Tori drops her bag on the center island and opens the fridge.

  “I didn’t do so great on my trig test today. I totally blanked.”

  She hands me a bottle of water. “Maybe you need a better tutor. Toby’s smart, but he obviously isn’t a good teacher.”

  “No, he is. I just suck at math.”

  “So does this mean you’ll be spending all your time with him instead of hanging out with me?”

  “Yes, it does, little sis.” Toby walks into the kitchen, cell phone in hand.

  Tori glares at him. “I’m four minutes younger than you.”

  “Like I said, little sis.” He ruffles her hair, which gets him smacked in the chest four times.

  “There, one for every minute older than me.” She pats her hair back into place and grimaces at him.

  “Don’t be so mean. I have good news for you.”

  She crosses her arms. “I doubt that.”

  “Hear him out,” I say, playing mediator as usual.

  “Fine. What’s the good news?”

  “Well, apparently you’re not a total spaz because Ryder said he wants to hang out with you again.”

  Her arms fall to her sides, and her mouth hangs open.

  “Tori, are you okay?” I ask, looking back and forth between her and Toby.

  “Give her a minute, and you may want to cover your ears,” Toby says.

  “What? Why?”

  Before he can answer, Tori lets out a shriek. I cover my ears, but it’s too late. I won’t be surprised if I fail my next hearing test.

  “You better not be kidding me. I’ll kill
you if you are. Then I’ll hunt down your secret girlfriend and kill her, too.”

  “My secret girlfriend?” He narrows his eyes at her.

  Tori looks at me and shrugs. “Might as well get this out in the open.”

  Get what out in the open? Toby and I exchange worried looks.

  “I know you’re seeing someone. You came home with rainbow sprinkles on you. You hate them. And you’ve been all goofy and happy. It’s annoying, and it can only mean you’re hooking up with someone new. Someone better than Meredith—not that it’s hard to find someone better than her.”

  Toby laughs. “You think that just because I told Meredith I’m not into her, I must be hooking up with someone else?”

  “That’s what I said. Becca thinks so too.” She picks up her water bottle and points it at me.

  “Oh, you do?” Toby’s almost too good at lying. Even I’m convinced he thinks we’re full of shit.

  I shrug. “I don’t know.”

  “Well, for both of your information—not that it’s any of your business—the guy at the ice cream place screwed up my order. I was in a good mood, so I didn’t send it back. And what do you know? Rainbow sprinkles really are better than chocolate.”

  Tori puts her water down again. “And what about the goofy grin you’ve been wearing all the time?”

  “I finally got rid of Meredith. Why wouldn’t I be grinning?”

  “I know she’s a tool, but you never seemed to mind her attention before. Why now?” Tori might have a future as a detective, or maybe a lawyer. I’m just glad I’m not on the receiving end of her interrogation.

  “It got annoying after a while. I only told her I was into someone else to let her down gently. Meredith isn’t the type of girl who’d back off because I said I didn’t like her. She’d try to change my opinion of her instead. Why are you girls always thinking you can change the guys you like and make them into your ideal, anyway?”

  “Don’t turn this around on us,” Tori says.

  “Fine. Are you finished with your questioning? Becca and I need to study.”

  “What about Ryder? When does he want to hang out?”

  “Didn’t say. I’ll talk to him and get back to you.” He turns to me. “You coming?”

  Tori waves him away. “Fine. Go. Take my best friend, but remember she’s not your friend.”

  He walks away. “Heard you loud and clear.”

  She shakes her head. “Ugh, how do you put up with him? Seriously, request another tutor.”

  “But then I’d never get to see you.” I put my hand on her shoulder. “At least this way, I’m only two doors away and I can see you before and after.”

  “I guess you’re right. Go study.”

  I give her a smile and head upstairs. Maybe I’m getting better at lying. I’m not sure how I feel about that. I knock on Toby’s door and it opens immediately.

  “What took you so long?”

  I walk inside, and he locks the door behind me.

  “I’m not supposed to seem eager to study with you, remember?”

  “Right.” He inches closer, and his fingers reach for my belt loop and tug me closer. As much as I love kissing him, I can’t help but wonder if that’s all he’s in this for. Does he even want to be my boyfriend?

  “I guess we should start with the questions I couldn’t get on the trig test today.”

  “You want to study?” He steps back, cocking his head at me.

  “Um, if I don’t do better in trig, Mr. Rollar will assign me a new tutor, and then how would we see each other?”

  “Touché.” Why does he have to sound so adorable when he says that?

  I step closer to him so there are mere inches between us. “Teach me quickly, and we’ll have plenty of time left over.”

  “How about we exhaust ourselves and then study?”

  I laugh. “Because I have a feeling you don’t exhaust easily.” Oh crap. Did I really just say that? All we’ve done is kiss a few times. Why did I have to go there? I turn away, too embarrassed to look at him.

  He reaches for my hand. “Hey.”

  “What?” I don’t turn back to him.

  “I’m not going to pressure you, you know.”

  That’s good to hear. “I know.”

  “You’ve never…”

  “I so don’t want to have this conversation.” I let go of his hand, walk to the bed, and open my bag. “Can we please just work on trig?”

  “Sure.” For the first time ever, he grabs the desk chair and pulls it over to the bed. Great. Now I’ve made him totally uncomfortable thanks to my lameness.

  We spend an hour doing nothing but trig. I want to smack myself for so many reasons. First, the problems I missed on today’s test were so easy. I don’t know how I blanked on them. But more than that, I inadvertently admitted I’m a virgin to Toby, of all people, and he hasn’t even so much as touched my hand since. This night is officially ruined.

  After we finish studying, I take off. I tell Tori I’m beat, and I drive home. Mom and Dad saved me a plate of meatloaf and mashed potatoes, and even though I’m not hungry, I force it down and tell them about my day. Most of it, anyway.

  “Why do you think you struggled with your test?” Mom asked.

  “Yeah, I thought Toby’s been tutoring you every night.” Dad adjusts his glasses, his gaze never leaving me.

  “I think my nerves got the best of me. I knew this chapter inside out yesterday, and it all came back to me during my tutoring session this afternoon. I just have to find a way to make this stuff stick in my head long enough to take the exams.” I shrug a shoulder. “Toby and I doubled our tutoring time, so hopefully that will help.”

  Mom reaches across the table and squeezes my hand. “Just keep trying your best. I’m sure it will all make sense to you soon.”

  I hope so. Because between trig and Toby, my life is a mess.

  After dinner I go upstairs and climb into bed. I study for my make-up Spanish quiz on Thursday and then turn out the light. My cell rings just as I close my eyes. Toby.

  “Hello?”

  “Hey. Can you talk?”

  “Sure.” Even though I’m not in the same room with him, I’m still self-conscious after our almost conversation.

  “I just want to say I’m sorry.”

  “For what?” He’s not the one who went and made things awkward.

  “Look, you know I like you, right?”

  Does he still? “I guess.”

  “What do you mean you guess?”

  “I thought maybe after—”

  “Wow.” He’s silent for a moment. “I didn’t realize you thought of me like that. I thought you knew me better.”

  Great, now I’ve offended him too. I should go before I ruin this completely.

  “I’m not that guy. Yeah, I like kissing you, but this isn’t just about physical stuff.”

  I sit up, wanting to catch every word he says.

  “I know you, Becca. I know you better than I think you know yourself.”

  “What do you mean? That’s not even possible.”

  “Really? ’Cause I remember you buying a shirt that totally wasn’t you.”

  “I did that to get your attention. I thought you’d like me better if I dressed like—”

  “Meredith?” He sighs. “You really don’t know me as well as I’d hoped.”

  “I’m sorry, but Tori wasn’t wrong earlier. It did seem like you liked Meredith.” I know I wasn’t imagining it. Not if Tori saw it too.

  “Maybe I did for a little while. But girls who are always there, never giving you any breathing room, get old fast. I think that’s why I like sneaking around with you. I get a chance to miss you. I look forward to seeing you, even if it’s only for a minute, like when I pulled you out of trig.”

  He’s right. Maybe the reason so many couples at Lansfield High implode after two weeks is because they’re always together. They get tired of each other. “I get what you’re saying.”

  “Yo
u do? You’re not mad that I don’t want to be attached at the hip? Not even after we can come clean to Tori? If we can come clean?”

  “No, I’m not mad. I don’t want to be like every other couple in school.”

  “Good. Me neither. So, are we cool?”

  “Yeah. We’re cool.”

  He doesn’t say a word, but I know he’s smiling. “Now about skydiving this weekend.”

  “You’ve got to be kidding. You said you knew me.”

  “I do. That’s why I know you’re going to come with me.”

  I laugh. “You’re crazy. I’m not jumping out of a plane at thirty thousand feet.”

  “It’s only ten thousand feet, and yes, you are.”

  “Oh, well if it’s only ten thousand feet…”

  “Sarcasm, I like it—but you’re still going.”

  “Not even if you drag me there.”

  “I wouldn’t drag you. It’s too far.”

  He’s the only person who can get under my skin and still make me smile. “Not happening. I don’t care what you say.”

  “What if I get Ryder to go out with Tori? She’ll be busy with him, and since she’ll be breaking her own stupid rule about not dating each other’s friends, we could go public.”

  That might actually work. “You play dirty, you know that?”

  “Hey, it’s totally your call. Think it over.” He pauses. Am I supposed to think it over right this second? “Oh, and, Becca?”

  “Yeah?”

  “Sweet dreams.” He hangs up, and I know I’ll have nightmares of plummeting to my death from ten thousand feet, because he’s right. I am willing to jump out of a plane for him.

  Chapter 13

  The rest of the week goes by pretty quickly. I ace my make-up Spanish quiz and redeem myself in the eyes of Senora Gomez. I got a C minus on my trig test, which is better than the previous ones, but according to Mr. Rollar, I need to pull all Bs and As on the rest of my tests if I want to pass the class. I assure him that I’m keeping up with my double tutoring sessions and I’ll do better on the next test. He says I have one more chance before he calls home.

  The best part of the week is my new plan for fifth period. I have study hall with Mrs. Engleberg, and since she’s getting kind of old, she has a tendency to nod off. So, Toby and I meet behind the stage, which is empty that period. It’s definitely become the highlight of my day. Now that I know he’s in this for more than just making out, I’m happy to do just that every chance we get. I still haven’t agreed to go skydiving, but we both know I will. And it’s fun to make him beg.