by Elks, Carrie
The truth was, she hadn’t wanted him to drive. As soon as he stepped out of the fire truck he’d looked completely washed out. And no wonder. From what she’d heard the other families talking about, almost four days of fighting the wildfire had required non-stop physicality.
She smiled as she remembered the expression on his face when he’d spotted her waiting for him. His eyes had lit up, and for a moment the weariness had melted away, replaced by an intense longing she knew had also been reflected on her own face. When they held each other tight it had felt right – so right – as though it didn’t matter what happened in the rest of the world. As long as they had each other nothing could hurt them.
Turning to look at Lucas again, she couldn’t help but smile at his sleeping form. He looked innocent in slumber, younger than she knew he was. His eyelids fluttered, his lips shivered as though he was trying to speak. She reached out to touch his close-cropped hair, feeling the dirt that coated it. But she didn’t care about that, not one bit, he was home and that was all that mattered.
“Lucas,” she whispered, though she hated to wake him. If she could’ve carried him upstairs she would have. But his two hundred plus pound frame was no match for her light one, so waking him up would have to do. If he could get himself up to her apartment, she could carry the load for him after that. She’d strip him down, and wash his tight t-shirt that clung to every muscle he had. It would be a shame to throw it away…
“Mmm?” He twisted in his seat, making cute smacking noises with his mouth. She bit down a smile and traced his lips, wondering if it would be wrong to kiss him while he was sleeping.
“Lucas?”
“What?” This time he bolted upright, looking around with a frown on his face. “What’s happened?”
She laid a gentle hand on his arm. “It’s okay. We’re home.” As he slowly acclimatized to the dim light of early evening, she got out of the driver’s seat and walked around the car to his side, opening the door and offering him her hand.
He took her palm in his, not relying on her at all as he got out of the car. “I can’t help but feel this is all the wrong way round,” he told her. “Shouldn’t I be the one opening the doors?” He closed his own door behind him and she hit the button on her key fob to lock it, as they walked over to her apartment.
“The way I see it, we can both open doors. You’ve taken care of me enough times. I’d like to return the favor.”
He gave her a questioning look, but said nothing. The elevator arrived and they stepped inside, Ember pressing her floor number quickly, as Lucas leaned against the rail that circled the interior. His eyes were fluttering again, and she had to bite down a smile. Who knew he could be so gorgeous when he was this tired?
The elevator pinged when they reached her floor. Ember took Lucas’ hand again, leading him down the corridor to her apartment, within moments they were inside.
“Let’s get you straight into the shower,” she suggested. “Then you can sleep. Everything else can wait until you’ve recovered from your exhaustion.”
“You’re being very kind to me,” he said, his voice low.
Was she? She didn’t feel like she was being kind. She was getting something out of this too. Being able to be close to him, to take care of him, made her feel warm inside.
“Not really,” she whispered. “It’s just a good excuse to see you naked.”
For the first time since she’d met him at the station, he laughed. As they made it to the bathroom he pulled his t-shirt off, revealing his hard, muscled chest. Like the rest of him, it was covered in dirt. Though she tried not to ogle him, it was impossible not to sneak a peek out of the corner of her eye as she turned on the shower and grabbed some toiletries for him from the bathroom cabinet.
When she pulled a towel down from the rack and turned to him, he was already naked, and it took every ounce of strength she had not to allow her gaze to roam all over him. She swallowed – hard – then put the towel down on the floor beside the shower. “I’ll leave you to it,” she told him, her voice thick. “And get your clothes put into the wash.”
He reached out for her, his fingers curling around hers. “Stay with me,” he said. “Please.” He took a step back, his eyes focused on hers as he pulled her toward the shower with him. “Shower with me.”
“Okay,” she whispered. “I’ll stay.
* * *
It had taken a few minutes for him to scrub the dirt from his skin. Ember had helped, her hands gentle as she’d washed away all the evidence of the past few days. He’d watched as the soot and the ashes had turned the water black, whirling on the shower floor in a clockwise circle before it disappeared down the plughole. Eventually the dark water turned lighter, before becoming clear. The combination of the warm water spraying down on him, and Ember’s gentle touch, made his skin tingle in the best of ways.
She was so close, her naked body only inches away from his. It was impossible not to be tantalized by her.
“Should we talk about this?” he asked her, the grit in his voice the only piece of dirt left. He wanted to touch her all over, the way she was touching him.
She shook her head. “Let’s talk in the morning,” she whispered, reaching out to trail her fingertip from his shoulder, down his chest to his stomach. “There’s no need for words tonight.”
It was exactly what he needed to hear. The very fact she was here in this shower, naked, told him that she wanted to be here as much as he did. And yeah, he had questions – about a thousand of them – but he wasn’t ready to ask them. He’d need to be awake enough to process the answers.
For now he wanted to use his mouth for something else. He wanted to feel, rather than think. He wanted to touch her, taste her, run his hands all over her soft, wet skin, and forget about everything outside this shower cubicle.
“Come here,” he said, reaching for her. She immediately stepped into his arms. Her body melted into his, her soft curves molding into his hard muscles. They were like yin and yang, different and yet somehow perfectly matched. He couldn’t get enough of the way she felt, the way she smelled. She filled every sense he had, leaving room for nothing else. And he loved it.
He dipped his head down and looked into her eyes. They were dark, dilated, and he could see himself reflected in their depths. “I’ve thought about nothing but you for the past four days,” he whispered, feathering his lips against hers. “Thought about touching you like this.”
She shivered as he ran his hands down her body, following the line of her waist and hips. “Are you sure you aren’t too exhausted?” she asked him.
“Not for you.”
He kissed her again, harder this time, feeling their lips clash together as his tongue slid against hers. Her nipples tightened against him, her body warm and pliant as he pulled her closer still. He lowered his head to kiss and nip at her throat, tasting the water that coated her.
It was impossible to get enough of her. He wasn’t sure he ever could. He wanted to be inside her, outside her, all around her. Wherever she was, he wanted to follow.
He ran his hand down the warm curve of her backside, then trailed his fingers down the back of her thigh. She let her head fall back, pushing her chest closer toward him. He lowered his head further still, brushing his lips against her clavicle, licking at the pool of water that had gathered at the bottom of her throat, before he kissed his way down to the swell of her breast.
Catching her hard nipple between his lips, he sucked and licked at it until she let out a soft sigh. Her hands cupped the back of his neck, encouraging him closer, her fingers massaging his scalp as he loved her with his mouth.
He was hard, so hard it hurt. And when she moved her hands down to wrap her fingers around him, he got harder still. He moved to her other breast, worshipping it the same way he’d worshipped the other, wanting to bring her the pleasure her hands were already giving him.
He moved his hand between her legs, feeling moisture there that had nothing to do with the sho
wer, pressing his fingers against her until she began to moan.
The water was pouring over them, hitting his head and her back, running down in thick rivulets to the basin. Ember slid her leg up his thigh, hooking around his waist, and he ran his hands around to her behind, helping her, lifting her, until their bodies were in complete alignment.
It was Ember who guided him to her, and Ember who arched her back until he could feel himself sliding inside. He had to grit his teeth as to not cry out at the pleasure of it, or the overwhelming happiness rushing through him as he began to move.
How had he ever thought he could face life alone? Being with Ember was everything. And as they made love, their skins wet and clean in her steamed-up shower – he knew he could never be apart from her again.
* * *
It was inevitable he’d wake up at some crazy hour of the night. His whole body was out of whack after the week he’d had, only getting rest when another crew had come to relieve them for a few hours. Lucas turned onto his back, then felt his stomach cramp up and gurgle – reminding him he hadn’t eaten for hours.
When it was clear it wasn’t going to shut up, he climbed out of bed, his muscles protesting at the sudden movement. Ember was still asleep, her dark hair fanned out on the pillow. He walked quietly across her bedroom so as not to wake her.
At some point in the night she’d washed and dried his clothes. They were in a folded-up pile on her bedroom chair. He felt his stomach clench again, this time not from hunger, but from the fact she was taking care of him. He hadn’t realized quite how much he’d like it.
Grabbing his undershorts, he pulled them on, then made his way into her kitchen, switching the light on to help in his search for food. As if it could sense the closeness of its prey, his stomach growled again, louder this time, and he had to turn around to check the bedroom door and make sure the noise hadn’t woken Ember up.
“Shut up,” he whispered at his abdomen. “I’m gonna feed you, okay?”
“Is there someone else out there, or are you talking to yourself?” Ember asked, her voice groggy as she walked out of her bedroom.
Okay, so he had woken her up. Lucas immediately felt bad. “I’m just looking for something to eat,” he whispered. “Go back to bed, I’ll join you in a minute.”
“Don’t be silly.” Ember walked into the kitchen and leaned against the counter. His eyes were immediately drawn to her long, bare legs. She’d put a t-shirt on before she’d come out of the bedroom, but that was all she was wearing.
His t-shirt, to be precise. His eyes scanned their way up her body, and a punch of pride hit him at the sight of her wearing his navy shirt with WCFD emblazoned in yellow across her chest. “That looks good on you,” he said, trying to keep his voice even. It was the understatement of the year.
She smiled, running her hands down the fabric. “It’s soft,” she said, her eyes crinkling up.
“And clean, thanks to you.” He looked down at his own body. “Thanks for washing my clothes.”
“I can make you a sandwich if you’re hungry,” she said, pushing herself off the counter. “Or cook you an omelet, and I have some ground beef in the freezer if you want something more substantial.”
“A sandwich will do. But I can make it.”
“I know you can, but I want to.” She gave him a small smile. “Tomorrow you’ll be back to making your own food, but for tonight, let me take care of you.”
There she was again, spoiling him. He could get used to this. He watched as she deftly buttered the bread and cut some cheese, layering it up with lettuce and tomato. She made enough for both of them, carrying two plates over to the table where she’d suggested Lucas sit down before he fell over.
“There you go,” she said, sliding one of the plates across the table to him. “It’s all yours.”
He picked up the sandwich and bit into it, swallowing the food almost as soon as it was in his mouth. He barely tasted it, he was that hungry. His stomach growled in welcome as the food hit the void.
“God, that’s good.”
“Glad to hear it,” Ember said, having only taken a bite in the time it took him to finish the whole thing. “Here, have my other half, you need it more than I do.” She pushed her plate toward him.
“You sure?” he asked her.
“Have at it. I can make you more if you want.”
By the time he’d finished her half of a sandwich, his stomach was finally silent. The griping had gone, replaced by a welcoming fullness. No doubt when morning finally arrived he’d be hungry again, but right now he was sated. Standing up, he took both their plates and walked over to the dishwasher, opening the door and putting them in the rack.
When he turned back, Ember was looking at him. He felt the impact of her gaze all over his skin. He swallowed, walking toward her, and reached for her hand.
“We should get back to bed,” he said. “You must be tired.”
She stood and let him lead her back to bed. “I think you’ll find that’s my line, I’m not the one who’s been fighting fires for days.” She still managed to yawn though, and he stifled a smile. He lifted the bedcovers up and motioned for her to climb in. Lying down behind her, he curled his body against hers, spooning her back with his front. Now that his hunger had abated, the exhaustion was back, adding weight to his eyelids until they fluttered closed.
Though his mind was still full of questions, they would have to wait until morning. Right now, they both needed to sleep.
29
The next time he woke he had a hunger that only a cooked breakfast would conquer. That’s how they ended up at the diner before six-thirty in the morning, watching as the waitress filled their mugs and scribbled down their orders.
“Do you have to go into the station this morning?” Ember asked, lifting the mug to her lips. He watched as the hot vapor rose up, obscuring her pretty lips.
“No.” He shook his head, then took a sip of his own coffee. It was bitter and black, the way he needed it. “Next shift doesn’t start until tomorrow morning. After that I’ll be back to normal. Twenty-four hours on, forty-eight off.” He gave her a small smile. “Not sure if I’m looking forward to that or not.”
“It’s what you’re used to,” Ember said, running her finger around the ring of her mug. “I’m sure your body will adapt.”
Yes, it would, it was his emotions he was worried about. “How about you?” he asked her. “Aren’t you supposed to be at work today?”
She nodded. “Yeah. I called Principal Sawyer and she’s got me covered until this afternoon.” She checked her watch. “That gives me just over six hours to wake myself up.”
“Two full Americans. One with poached egg, one with scrambled. Enjoy.” The waitress spoke in a monotone, not that he could blame her. It really was too early in the morning to be showing any enthusiasm. The waitress disappeared as quickly as she had arrived, leaving Ember and Lucas to breathe in the delicious aroma of bacon and eggs.
“Can I ask you a question?” Lucas asked as he picked up a piece of bacon. “That’s if you’re ready to talk about things.”
Ember smiled at him, and it filled him with joy. “I’ve been ready all night,” she told him.
Lucas licked his lips, tasting the salt of the bacon clinging to his skin. “Can you tell me what happened at the party?” he asked her, picking up his mug and swallowing some coffee. “One minute we were having a good time and the next I felt like I’d lost you. And though I’m glad we’re here together now, I don’t want you hanging around me because you have a misplaced sense of owing me something.”
She rolled her lip between her teeth – something he’d noticed she did every time she was deep in thought. The same way he ran his hand across the back of his neck – at least according to Griff, strange how they all had their tells. He wanted to know all of hers, to study her until he knew her inside out. He wasn’t sure he’d ever get enough of her.
“I’ve been thinking about Saturday night a lot,” she ad
mitted, looking at him through her thick eyelashes. “And I’m so sorry I lost it while you were with me. I’m so embarrassed.”
“Don’t apologize to me for that,” he said. “Didn’t you tell me last night that we can support each other at different times? Maybe Saturday night was my night.”
She gave him a wan smile. “Well I appreciate it, but I can’t help but wish that you didn’t have to see me like that. You must have thought I was crazy.”
“I was worried about you. I’d never seen you like that. You looked broken.”
“I wasn’t broken,” she said, her eyes catching his. “I was shocked, I think. Real shock. The kind that freezes you and means you can’t form a coherent thought.”
He nodded. “I know exactly what you mean. I’ve been there, too.”
“With the baby?”
“Yeah. The next time I went out to a call after the baby died I froze completely. That’s when Chief Simons told me to take some leave.”
She pulled her gaze away from his, looking almost ashamed. He wanted to reach out, tip her face up, and make her look at him again. He missed the warm depths of her eyes. “There was something I should have told you back then,” she said, her voice soft. “You confided in me and I should have confided in you, too.” Finally she looked at him, and he could see the clouds behind her stare. “It’s weird, because my shock was about a baby, too.” She took a deep breath, as if to steel herself. “Just before Will left, I realized I’d missed two periods. I took a pregnancy test and it was positive.”
“You were pregnant?” he asked her, his mouth dropping open. He hadn’t expected that at all.
“As it turned out I wasn’t. I was one of those one in a million who got a false positive. But for a little while I thought I was, and I told Will about it. Turns out he didn’t want to have a baby with me. In fact, he didn’t want to be with me at all. I was getting all excited about bringing a new life into the world, and he was silently working out how he could get out of being a dad.” She smiled sadly. “A week later I saw the doctor, he took another test, and that came up negative. There were no signs I’d ever been pregnant at all.” She ran a finger along her bottom lip, deep in her own thoughts.