Zach had hovered when she started, but she made him go sit down. It didn’t keep him from glancing in her direction every few minutes.
He gave her a weak smile and crossed the room to her fridge. A second glow whispered through the darkness when he opened the door, illuminating his wrinkled shirt.
She studied the way his arms and back moved under the fabric, but looked away before the memories could resurface. Part of the delay in her work was because she kept replaying his words over and over in her head. She was starting to believe she felt the same way, and it terrified her. All the reasons she left a year ago rushed back in the jumble of fear. What if they didn’t work out? What if that destroyed this thing they’d built and then rebuilt?
And what if none of that happens, and it’s as amazing as I hope?
He crossed the room and set a can on the table. “How does it look?”
She tried to ignore the tingle when his hand brushed her arm and the twinge of disappointment when he stepped back. She took a long swallow of the cold coffee drink. “Same as last time you asked. And the time before. And always. It looks like two rich kids who don't understand the concept of restricted spending have blown through your advertising budget six months faster than they should have.”
“Yeah, that sounds about right.” He leaned over her, chest brushing her shoulder. “Those are the numbers?”
She nodded, glum spreading through her. She’d been through every option she could think of. Pre-orders wouldn’t help the way she projected originally, since they couldn’t afford their own distribution and retailers wouldn’t pay out until release day. They didn’t even have enough left for a basic cable ad. Well, maybe one, but not if they wanted to do anything else. “Look at it this way. If one of you mortgages your house, you should be able to pay for some pay-per-click ads and maybe a couple of gaming magazine spots.”
“Really?” His voice was teasing. “Scott's definitely since mine is home base.”
She giggled. “Nice.”
“I’ve missed your laugh.”
A pulse of want raced over her, and she pushed away from him, almost toppling her chair. She hoped the heat flooding her face didn’t show. The conflict inside gnawed at her exhaustion. “Don't.”
He frowned. “So I’m really the only one this is killing.”
Regret and longing filled her. “I... I’m sorry.”
He crossed his arms, expression hardening. “Just make the numbers work. That's what I'm supposed to say now, right?”
When he turned away, emptiness throbbed inside her. She licked her lips, mouth suddenly dry. “Wait.”
“What?” He didn't turn around.
The chair's metal casters screeched on the tile when she stood. She closed the distance between them but didn't dare touch him. “I didn't... I just— I'm sorry.”
He shrugged, muscle rippling under skin along his back. “We'll find the money somewhere.”
Her pain grew at the callous response. “Not about that.”
He whirled back to face her. “I can't do this. You push me away, you want me back, you lean closer, you pull away. I mean it when I say it’s devouring me.”
She swallowed and stepped forward. Resting a hand on his chest, she felt his heartbeat racing against her palm. He was as nervous as she was. “Do you want to know why I left?”
“You missed your cue. That was your line five hours ago.”
She didn’t look away. It ached to look him in the eye, but she had to let him know she was being sincere. “I was terrified of how intense this is. Something this hot and passionate burns out.” As the words spilled out, their truth sank deep. Why had she never realized that before? “We can’t afford to burn out. This is more than just how we feel about each other. You don’t want Kelly to happen again, and I don’t either. But even now, I feel empty without you.”
His gaze raked over her face. “Just because the fire shifts, doesn’t mean it has to fade or go out. Cord was a huge risk. We blew everything on it, and in the end, we almost lost it all. Rinslet, that’s like doubling down on zero at the roulette table after winning the first time. It’s worth the risk though. I’d never forgive myself if I walked away. Neither would Scott.”
He traced a thumb over her cheek, and cupped her neck. “I feel the same way about you and me. Except with us, I don’t see the same risk. Still, I’d never let myself live it down if I walked away from you without trying. It destroys me every time you leave, and that’s part of how I know it’s real.”
She didn’t want to hear that because she knew exactly what he meant. Acknowledging it meant admitting she didn’t feel complete without him. “Having you here now is incredible, even if we’re just working, but...”
He put a finger on her lips. “I’m running out of words to tell you how much I want you, but it’s more important to me you’re happy. I honestly think you and I can make it work, but only if you’re interested.”
“Maybe.” She was more than interested, but it couldn’t be as simple as he made it sound.
“You have to be at least a little more certain than that.” He wrapped his fingers around hers and tugged her toward the bedroom. “You’re not listening. I’ll show you what I mean, instead.”
She followed him, curious. “Show me...?”
He paused just inside the bedroom door. “You worked really hard tonight.” He moved behind her, hands on her arms, chest against her back. “And even if we don’t have an answer, we’ll find one.”
She smiled at the tender words. She adored this side of him no one ever got to see. “I can take a little more hard, if that’s what you’ve got in mind.”
He chuckled. “Don’t move.”
“Why?” Air rushed in around her as he let go.
She assumed he’d stepped away, she just couldn’t tell how far. A moment later, his hands rested on her shoulders. “Let me spoil you for the night.”
His request was pleading mixed with command, and she couldn’t refuse the combination. She nodded.
His thumbs kneaded into her neck, and she sighed. That felt incredible.
“You’re too tense.” He massaged deeper. “This might need some more serious attention.” His hands dropped to her hips. “May I?”
She wasn’t sure exactly what he was asking, but as long as it involved feeling more of him, she was game. “Yes.”
He stripped off her shirt and tossed it aside. The air conditioner cooled her skin, and her nipples hardened. His fingers glided along her spine, and he unhooked her bra, letting it fall away.
Anticipation raced through her, slick wetness pooling between her legs. He hooked his thumbs in the elastic of her bottoms and shoved the rest of her clothing to the floor, never touching her with more than his hands.
His whisper caressed the outer edge of her ear. “Lie on the bed on your stomach.”
“Okay.” She did as she was told. What was he up to? The cool cotton soothed but didn’t erase the heat flooding her bare skin.
A moment later, a new weight rested against the back of her legs, and his skin met the outside of her thighs. She turned her head enough to see him straddling her, wearing nothing but his boxers. Her pulse screamed in response.
He placed a hand at the base of her neck. “No peeking. Get comfortable.”
She wanted to ask why but also wanted to be surprised. She folded her arms and rested her chin on them. “Done.”
“There’s a part of me that’s jealous about the bottle of lavender massage oil in the bathroom.” A soft pop filled the room. A lid being opened for the first time? “But it’s tempered by the fact you’ve never used it.”
“It was a white elephant gift.”
“Lucky me.” The faint scent of lavender drifted through the air. Seconds later, his hands found her shoulders.
The touch was enough to drive her wild, but when he began to massage, grip sliding easily with the help of the oil, her tension faded away. She moaned softly each time he hit a tight muscle.
<
br /> “You need to learn to unwind.”
“Whatever you say.” She had zero desire to argue.
He worked his way along her neck and shoulders, rubbing and forcing away the knots, spending several minutes in each spot before moving to the next. Relaxation forced aside her pent up stress...concerns...fears...everything.
He reached her lower back, and she gasped at the bunched up muscles he dug his thumbs into.
“Too much?” His attentions slowed.
“No.” She shook her head. “Perfect. Don’t stop.”
“I like the way you say that.” He worked deeper into the tissue, working the area until it was hot.
His hands slid over her ass, and she let out a soft giggle at the light touch. When he reached her thighs, she sighed. He paid as much attention there, and then to her calves and feet, as he had everywhere else.
Her entire body was tingling when he finally broke away, and her eyelids were threatening to droop shut.
He crawled up the bed next to her and lay on his back. She shifted her position, so she could rest her head on his shoulder and her hand on his chest.
“You’re not coming back to Salt Lake, are you?” He rested his hand on her hip.
She’d missed this closeness so much, and it ached to give him an honest answer. “I’m still under contract here, and your numbers...”
He sighed. “I know. They don’t add up.”
Maybe it was a good thing they didn’t fuck. It was already going to hurt to say goodbye in the morning. “If I could see any way...”
“Yeah. Me too.”
A heavy silence fell between them.
Rae traced lines over Zach's bare chest, listening to the soft beat of his heart. She needed to burn this moment in her mind forever. She didn’t know when she was going to get a chance to relive it. She looked around her bedroom as much as she could without moving. The flower prints on the walls. The comforter and sheets in a color scheme that matched the taupe paint. Or was it beige? It made her a little sad she’d never decorated the room to reflect her personality.
“What are you thinking about?”
His soft question startled her, but there was no reason to hide anymore. “How much I’m going to miss you.”
He pulled her closer. “If I thought even for a minute it wouldn’t make you completely miserable, I’d ask you to quit and just come stay with me. I could take care of us both.” A deep tremor ran through his voice.
Her chest ached. They both knew neither of them would be happy like that. “If you’re good—like really, really good—even if, for some strange reason, the response at E3 is only lukewarm, you can stay solvent until you start turning a profit. That means a hiring freeze and minimal pay raises.”
“You say the sexiest things in bed.”
“I can’t help it. I don’t want to watch you leave again, and I can’t think of a way to change it.”
“Technically, I didn’t leave last time, so I can’t leave again.”
She shook her head without lifting it. “I still wish there was another way.”
“Me too. Are you coming back to Salt Lake after your contract is up?”
She bit the inside of her cheek. “I don’t know.” She’d considered it, but shot the idea down as false home so many times, she learned to ignore it before it even became a fully-formed thought.
“You won’t cut me off though, right?” There was a trace of hesitation in his question she didn’t think she’d ever heard before. “We’ll still do this long distance?”
She nodded against his skin. “You couldn’t stop me.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
Nervous energy thrummed through Zach. He tapped his foot against the concrete and checked his watch again.
Chloe hopped onto a nearby stool, feet swinging back and forth. “That doesn't make the time go any faster, you know.”
“I know.” As much as he was grateful to have her assistance, he couldn’t help wishing Rae were there instead. And he had no idea how Chloe was so calm.
Scott sat on a second stool behind the tall table they'd set their demo stations up on. He stretched and popped his neck. His shirt matched Chloe's. White, obnoxious logo stretched across the front, but about three sizes bigger. “You know it's too late to worry, right? I mean, either it goes well now or it doesn't. Besides, it's not like anyone's going to be this far back in the room when the doors open.”
“You're not helping.” Zach couldn’t keep his expression stern long enough for it to make an impact. His clothing matched theirs. He couldn't believe they had talked him into the casual outfits. It was an industry affair. He should be in a suit and tie. He should be mingling. He should be headlining the large Cord/DM booth positioned directly in front of the entrance to the exhibitors’ hall instead of hidden in a corner like a nobody.
That was a bad road to go down. He was over that need. But part of him still remembered the attention they'd drawn two years before. The memory brought back another, more bitter one—Kelly turning down his marriage proposal in front of thousands during their game launch. On second thought, he was definitely better off tucked out of sight with his friends.
Chloe moved from one demo station to the next, loading up the game on each. “We'll be fine. Amazing even. You have a good team.”
Scott cleared his throat. “And they’re so modest, too.”
She glanced over her shoulder but didn't stop working. “I learned it from the best.”
Scott laughed. “Flattery still doesn’t lead to raises.”
She looked at Zach. “That’s not what you told me.”
Zach shook his head, the banter pushing aside some of his tension. “Bullshit, it’s not.”
“Psst.” A stage whisper interrupted.
The three of them turned in unison.
Jordan stood at the edge of the booth, DM button-down tucked into beige slacks. “Hey, guys.”
“Hey, traitor.” Chloe winked at him. She stepped forward and straightened his collar. “You look like a proper corporate tool.”
Jordan rolled his eyes and grabbed his crotch. “I've got your corporate tool right here. What you have is amazing, right?”
Scott tossed him a shrink-wrapped demo disc. “Like you haven't seen it already. Had to get some old-school hack to build the engine.”
Jordan snagged the square out of the air. He studied the package, smirking. “I'm sure you did fine. You even rocked the artwork. And the logo.” His gaze fell to Chloe's chest. “Definitely rocked the logo.”
She snapped her fingers in front of his face. “Are you allowed to be over here?”
Jordan smirked and took a step forward. He whispered something in her ear.
Chloe snorted with laughter. “Still looking forward to it.”
He nodded. “You didn't tell, right?”
“Of course not.”
He handed her the demo disc. “I've got a copy on my laptop. I probably shouldn't let them see me with it.”
Zach sighed, not surprised. Even when Jordan hadn't had friends on the inside, back before Cord hired him, he hadn't had a problem getting his hands on pre-release demos of their games. Zach waited until Jordan was gone. “What are you two up to?”
Chloe didn't look at him, hands shoved in her pockets. “I'm not allowed to tell. Don't worry; it's not bad.”
“Not reassuring.” Scott's comment echoed Zach's sentiments. “It's ten, by the way. Doors are opening.”
The earlier nervousness returned, pulsing through Zach's veins and sitting heavy in his stomach. He pasted a smile on and paced to the edge of the booth, watching the media and attendees spill into the exhibit hall.
And they waited. The minutes became hours. The occasional person came by and grabbed a demo disc off the stack, but didn't make eye contact with any of them.
Chloe sighed and leaned back against a nearby table, hands in her pockets. “How much longer till the courtesy suites open?”
Zach rolled his eyes. “One: no cou
rtesy suites. Rae will kill me if I let you get drunk. And two: it's barely noon.”
Chloe scrunched up her face. “Great. Now I have a babysitter.”
Maybe mentioning Rae had been a bad idea. A whisper of longing floated through him. It didn’t feel right with her not there. Even if he didn’t miss her so much, she’d earned it as much as any of them.
“Excuse me.” A smooth tenor interrupted the light-hearted exchange. “I’m looking for a Scott McAllister or a Zach Johnston?”
Zach started to correct the older gentleman out of habit—except he’d pronounced Zach’s last name right. Nice change. He extended his hand. “I’m Zach.” And nodded to his left. “This is Scott.”
“Gentlemen.” The new arrival was about the same build as Zach and wore a tailored suit—silk probably—complete with cuff links and topped off with a leather briefcase. He shook everyone’s hands. “Grant Lent. I’ve heard a lot about you.”
Zach’s smile froze. That never meant good things. And why did that name sound familiar? “I’d like to say the same.”
Grant gave a deep chuckle. “Do the two of you have a moment?”
“Sure. Step into our private office.” Sarcasm traced Scott’s reply, and he nodded to the empty space behind the wall of their booth.
If the tone bothered Grant, it didn’t show. His wide smile never wavered. “I won’t take you away for long.” The three of them crossed the short distance to out of sight. “I hear you have fantastic things on the horizon.”
Zach bit back the question on the tip of his tongue.
Scott didn’t. “Who told you that?”
Zach wanted to be bothered by the blunt approach, but at least it might mean an answer.
Grant shook his head. “The word is out, here and there. Thing is, I like what I’ve seen, and I’m impressed you’ve done so much with so little.” He pulled a card from his shirt pocket and handed it to Zach. “And I want in on the ground floor.”
No way. That’s why Zach knew the name. Grant owned one of the largest private investment groups in the country. He pocketed the card. He didn’t want to say this, but continuing the conversation would be a mistake.
His Long Shot (Love Games) Page 17