Orphan Train Disaster
Page 6
“Thank you, Lily. Not just for the cake, but for listening.”
“I am always here. You come and see me anytime you want. Bring Conrad, too. In fact, why don’t you both come on Sunday? Gustav and Alice are coming to tea and bringing a Miss Baker. She works at the orphanage where Alice used to live. Alice speaks of her like a guardian angel. I’m curious to meet her.”
“We’d love to come, thank you, Lily.”
Maria took the cake, cookies and other things Lily had wrapped up. Lily whistled for a cab, surprising Maria. She’d never have believed a lady like Lily could make that sound, but it worked as a cab arrived promptly.
Maria hesitated, she didn’t have the money for the fare, but Lily had thought of that already. As she made her way home, Maria counted her blessings. She didn’t know what she would do if she lost Mama or anyone else in her family. They might not be perfect, but they supported each other in their own way. She’d make an extra effort with Rosa from now on.
Chapter 17
Frieda held Leonie’s mother’s hand while Dr. Richard Green examined her. Frieda suspected Johanna’s liver was failing. Despite Johanna’s color, her shriveled up body, and her yellow pupils, Frieda hoped Dr. Green would find a different cause. Her hopes died as he delivered his diagnosis.
“Mrs. Chiver… Johanna… there is no easy way to say this. I…”
“I’m dying,” Johanna whispered.
“Yes, ma’am. I’m so sorry. If there was anything we could do, we would, but in cases like these, the best we can do is keep you comfortable. The pain must be unbearable.”
Despite the agonized expression in her eyes, Johanna put on a brave face, “I get by.”
Frieda turned her head so Johanna wouldn’t see her tears.
“Is there anyone we can get for you? A family member?” Dr. Green asked.
Frieda took over. “I’ll speak to Leonie, Johanna’s eldest daughter. There is nobody else.” Frieda didn’t want anyone asking for Johanna’s husband.
“I’ll go get you some morphine for the pain, Johanna. Try to rest a little.”
Frieda thanked Richard before taking a seat beside Johanna’s bed. When he left, Johanna reached for Frieda’s hand.
“What will happen to my young ones? Leonie, she tries, but she’s too young to look after the little ones. She’s at work all day.” Johanna’s voice was fainter than before.
“Do you have any family? A sister or a close friend?”
Johanna closed her eyes, Frieda assumed she had drifted off to sleep. She waited, holding the woman’s hand, praying her suffering would be over soon. Richard returned to administer the morphine injection.
“Why didn’t she come to see us before now?” he asked.
“It’s my fault. I should have visited.”
Johanna moved her head slightly and then opened her eyes. She spoke in short sentences, trying to get the words out but struggling.
“Not your fault. You were kind to us. Dr. Patrick, too. Mine. I had too much pride. Didn’t want people to know I couldn’t cope.” Johanna struggled to sit up. Richard and Frieda supported her as a nurse gave her more pillows.
“There’s nobody, Frieda. Any family I had, gave me up for dead a long time ago. They didn’t agree with me marrying Jacob Chiver. Said he was a no good, lily livered son of a rattlesnake. They was right too. But I was in love, thought I knew best.”
“Do you know where he’s at?” Richard asked.
Johanna shook her head, violently. “No, and I don’t want to. He’s never to get his hands on my children, especially the children. He wouldn’t treat them right. Beat them when they were little. He tried treating Leonie like… like a wife.”
Frieda exchanged a look of horror with Richard. Was it the morphine talking? Sometimes people hallucinated.
Johanna spoke faster than before, as if desperate to get the words out.
“That’s why I got rid of him. I knows people feel sorry for me, said he left me. I ran him out of town. Told him I’d get him one night when he was asleep if he ever set foot in my house again. I sharpened a kitchen knife. I wasn’t going to kill him. I told him what I’d do. He’d never be able to hurt another girl again. You should have seen his face. Worked, too. I never saw him after that. I don’t know whether he’s alive or dead. I don’t care neither.” Johanna fell back on the pillow.
“Rest now. Let the morphine work its magic. I’ll look after your children, Johanna, I promise. You know Lily and Kathleen from Carmel’s Mission? They’ll help me.” Frieda brushed the hair back from Johanna’s forehead, massaging the woman’s temples. “That’s it. Relax and sleep. We will talk more tomorrow.”
Frieda sat by the bed as Johanna slept, still holding her hand. She cried silently for this poor woman and her children back at the Sanctuary. Why hadn’t she done more? She knew Leonie was struggling during the strike. She should have kept visiting; she should’ve helped more.
She sensed someone watching and looked up to find Patrick standing a little away from the bed, as if he was afraid to intrude.
“Frieda, Dad said you were here. You should be at home, resting.”
“I can’t go home. I failed her,” Frieda looked at Johanna.
“You didn’t fail anybody, Frieda. you can’t cure everyone. We’re doctors, not God.”
“Don’t you think I know that! But I should have checked up on the family. So should you! Why didn’t you go back to visit them? You knew she was sick. You could have helped --” Frieda stopped, horrified by what she had said. Attacking Patrick would help no one.
“Frieda, I went back. Mrs. Chiver didn’t want me to visit anymore. She said she was feeling better, and my time was best used looking after those that needed me. I had my final exams, and it was hard to find time to study and… Don’t you know how bad I feel?”
She did, and she could see her own emotions reflected in his eyes. Guilt, anger, and regret.
“I didn’t mean what I said. I know you did your best. I just…. I feel so angry. Why do good people die and horrible people live long healthy lives?”
“That’s not a question I can answer.” Patrick examined Johanna, noting her breathing and pulse rate on her chart.
“How long?” Frieda whispered.
“A day or so. You should bring the children in to say goodbye. But wait until the morning. Dad gave her a large dose of morphine so she will sleep for hours. She needs the rest.”
Frieda stood and kissed Johanna on the forehead.
“I will be back soon. Don’t let go, Johanna, until I come back with your children, you hear?” Frieda’s voice shook.
Patrick stood back to let her pass. “She’ll be in a deep sleep for a while after the morphine. Let her daughters sleep tonight.”
“Patrick…”
“You go, I’ll stay with her.” He didn’t look at her. She wanted to reach out and touch him, to apologize for her words, her anger. But he was so distant and cold.
With a last look at Johanna, she left.
Chapter 18
When Frieda got back to the Sanctuary, it was after three in the morning. Everyone was asleep, Patrick was right. It was pointless waking Leonie and her siblings now. She would see them first thing in the morning.
She lay on her bed, but sleep wouldn’t come. Every time she closed her eyes she saw Patrick’s wounded expression, the hurt in his eyes. She couldn’t believe she’d attacked him like that. He didn’t deserve her censure or her judgement. He was a wonderful, committed doctor.
She must have fallen asleep as gentle knocking on her bedroom door woke her. Lily poked her head around the open door.
“Frieda, I’m sorry to wake you, but Leonie and the twins are wondering how their mother is. Leonie will have to leave for work shortly.”
“Lily, what are you doing here so early?”
“I slept in one of the empty beds.” She came into the bedroom, softly closing the door behind her. “So how is she?”
“Bad. She will die soo
n. Richard gave her morphine. Patrick is with her, but he said to let the children sleep.”
“The poor woman and those children. What will they do? Will you be able to track down the father?”
“No, definitely not.” Frieda told Lily the story Johanna had told them last night.
Lily wasn’t shocked, she’d heard similar tales far too often.
“They will have to stay here for the moment. Based on what Maria said, their apartment is barely habitable. I wish I had space for Leonie to work here. If the factory was built…” Lily fell silent.
“I know, Lily.”
“Do you want me to be with you when you break the news?” Lily spoke gently, her eyes full of concern.
Tears sprang into Frieda’s eyes at Lily’s thoughtfulness. “Please. I know I should face them alone, but I feel so guilty. I should have checked up on Mrs. Chiver before now.”
“Frieda, would checking on her have stopped her getting whatever is killing her?”
Frieda shook her head. “I don’t think so.”
“Then you can stop talking like that. We can only do so much. Wash your face, and I will bring the children downstairs. We will get them breakfast before we go to the hospital. I guess someone should tell Leonie’s work.”
“Maria will do that. She is bound to guess when Leonie doesn’t turn up. I can’t see the boss giving Leonie time off though.” Frieda got out of bed. “The Triangle bosses are not known for their charity.”
Lily sighed. “Let’s pretend they are and deal with the consequences later. Better to ask for forgiveness than to ask for permission, right?”
Frieda flashed Lily a smile, trying to ease the concern written all over the other woman. Then she turned to wash her face. Lily took the hint and left.
With a glance in the mirror, Frieda left soon after. She was about to break the children’s hearts.
Carrie and Morris reacted as expected, crying for their mother, but the older twins worried Frieda more. They just stared at her. Leonie didn’t shed a tear, just looked more downcast than she usually did.
“I knew she was worse than she let on. What will happen now?” Leonie asked.
“Don’t worry about that for now.” Lily said. “You will stay here for now. Have breakfast, and then we will all go to the hospital. Your mother wants to see you. After, we will go back to your apartment, pack up your things, and bring them here.”
“We lose our home and Mother, Leonie?”
“It wasn’t ours, Sam. You don’t want to be there when that man comes back, do you?” Leonie spoke harshly, her despair getting the better of her.
Sam shook his head, his eyes on Leonie. She didn’t say another word. Frieda wanted to shield the youngsters, but couldn’t blame Leonie. Overnight she had become a parent and sole earner of this little family.
Frieda took Morris by the hand. “Why don’t we see what we can rustle up for breakfast. Do you like porridge?”
Morris screwed up his face. “I don’t know. What is it?”
“It’s a bowl of warm oats. I love it. Try it and see for yourself. It will keep you warm inside.”
“Can we bring ma some?” Morris said, his eyes lit up with hope.
“Yes, Morris. She might like that.” Frieda didn’t know how she kept her voice steady. She wanted to scream and rant about how unfair life was, but that wouldn’t help anyone.
Breakfast passed quickly with Cook spoiling the children. She packed a small basket for Morris to take to the hospital.
Frieda whispered, “Cook, I don’t think Johanna will eat anything.”
“I know that, Frieda, but it will do that child good to think he’s helping. Poor little thing. He looks no older than a toddler.”
“He and Carrie are almost four. Their older twin brothers are eight, and Leonie is fifteen, or thereabouts,” Frieda whispered for fear the children would hear her.
Cook made the sign of the cross before giving her eyes a quick wipe with the corner of her apron. Then she started washing some pots. She’d scrape the metal off the bottom at the rate she was scrubbing.
Lily came in to tell them the cab was waiting outside. Morris and Carrie moved to Leonie’s side, but she seemed unaware of her younger siblings' need for reassurance. Lily helped Morris into the cab before handing him the basket of food, “Can you carry that, Morris, or is it too heavy?”
“No, I can hold it.”
“Carrie, you climb into that seat beside Morris and then I’ll sit beside you. Sam and Alfred can sit in the back. Frieda can sit beside Leonie. All set, off we go.”
Frieda could tell Lily was forcing her voice to sound cheerful. No doubt she was dreading the hospital visit too.
As they neared the hospital, Frieda’s stomach turned over. Would Patrick be there? Would he still be angry or would he accept her apology? Morris put his hand into Frieda’s and asked, “Does Mother look scary?”
Cursing herself for thinking about Patrick and not these poor children, she put her arm around Morris. “No sweetheart, she looks the same as yesterday. Maybe a little more tired. She is on very strong medicine to help keep her comfortable.”
Morris paused as if to consider what Frieda had said before asking, “Will she know us?”
Frieda wasn’t sure of the answer, so she avoided the question. She hoped Johanna hadn’t lost consciousness for the sake of the children, although for their mother, it would bring relief.
Chapter 19
Patrick was at Johanna’s bedside. He greeted Lily with a kiss on the cheek, and then shook hands with Leonie. He barely looked at Frieda.
“Johanna, your children are here,” he said softly, brushing Johanna’s hand to wake her. He addressed the youngsters, “Your mom is tired, but she’s been asking for you.”
“Mama, wake up. Please. I want to go home,” Carrie cried, pushing her way past Frieda and climbing up on the bed. She sat on the edge, stroking her mother’s hair. “We have a picnic for you. Cook is very nice and she gave me cookies.”
Carrie pulled at her mother before glaring at Patrick.
“What have you done to Mama? Why isn’t she listening to me?”
“Carrie, be quiet. Mother will be cross if you make a spectacle of yourself,” Leonie admonished her sister.
Johanna’s eyes opened and lit up when she saw her daughters. “My children, give me a kiss.” Carrie kissed her, not moving out of the way for the others until Frieda intervened.
“Sit here, Carrie, on the seat. You can hold your mother’s hand.”
Carrie sat down and held onto her mother in a vice-like grip. Johanna grimaced but when Frieda tried to loosen the child’s hold, Johanna whispered, “No. Let her hold me.”
Frieda bit her lip, trying to remain brave. She listened as Johanna told each of her children how much she loved them, and how they would have to stick together in the future. Johanna picked something individual to say to each child. “Carrie, your drawings will hang in art galleries. My darling Leonie, grown up before your time. Your designs will dress smart ladies all over New York. I’m so proud of you.” Johanna’s voice slurred slightly as she battled tiredness and pain to speak. She held Morris’s hand as she told him how she loved the way he made her laugh. Then to the older twins she said, “Sam, you must keep practicing your writing. They will make your stories into books one day. Alfred, dear, solemn boy, you will be a scientist or a doctor. Someone special to help people like me. You all make me so proud.”
Johanna closed her eyes again, but just as Frieda was about to usher the children outside, Johanna spoke again.
“Now be good and go wait in the hall with Dr. Frieda. I need to speak to Miss Lily for a moment.”
The younger twins protested, but at a look from their mother, they left. Frieda shepherded them outside, leaving Patrick and Lily behind. Patrick came out to call them back inside a few minutes later.
“Children your mother wants to see you.”
Frieda wrapped her arms around her stomach as she watched th
e children hug and kiss their mother goodbye. Lily came to stand at her side, her arm around Frieda’s shoulders, her eyes just as glassy. Then Johanna called for Frieda and Patrick.
“Thank you both for all you did for me.”
Frieda couldn’t reply. Patrick said huskily, “I wish all my patients were like you, Johanna.”
Johanna smiled. Her eyes went back to her children, huddled around her. Carrie on one side, Morris on the other, with Leonie supporting Morris from behind. The older twins stood behind Carrie.
“Leonie, look after my babies. I love you.”
For a few seconds, they stared at their mother.
“Is she dead?” Leonie whispered, still looking at her mother.
Patrick responded, “No, she’s sleeping for now. You can stay with her. I’ll make sure nobody disturbs you.” His gaze met hers for a second before he left the room.
Lily indicated for Frieda to take a seat beside her, but Frieda needed to go to Patrick. He looked like he wanted to cry.
“I’ll be back in a few minutes.”
She left the room wondering if it had been Patrick who arranged for a private room. She found him on the roof of the hospital; it was where they went when they had a harrowing crisis.
“Patrick.”
“Not now, Frieda. I haven’t slept in hours. I don’t want to say something I shouldn’t.”
Taken aback by his tone, she kicked herself for hurting him.
“Patrick, I want you to listen to me. What I said yesterday, I didn’t mean it. I was hurt, angry, confused, tired, and all the above. You did what you could, more than that for Johanna. I’m sorry.”
Silence.
“Patrick, I…”
“She’s dying. I didn’t save her. You were right in what you said. Other things distracted me. I can see that now. I will do better. From now on, I will focus solely on my work. Next time, maybe the patient won’t die because of my neglect.”