by Carsen Taite
* * *
Starr pushed open the door to Catherine’s building, a little surprised to find it unlocked. Of course, Catherine probably didn’t realize she no longer had a patrol unit watching out for her, but Starr planned to remedy that as soon as possible. First order of business, make amends for her careless way of breaking the news about Pratt’s release, and then assure Catherine she planned to do everything in her power to make sure he was brought to justice for the harm he’d inflicted on her, her mother, and Hannah Turner. There was no doubt in her mind that Pratt was responsible for Catherine’s mother’s murder, and both kidnappings—she didn’t give a damn what anyone had to say about memory loss or lack of evidence. Her gut was all she needed, and she trusted her instincts implicitly.
She was only a couple of steps from Catherine’s office when she heard the sound of voices. Thinking perhaps Catherine was on the phone, she debated her options. It wasn’t cool to eavesdrop, but she didn’t want to leave and miss this opportunity to catch Catherine alone. She was just starting to back away when she heard a man’s voice say, “It was divine intervention that lead me back to you.”
Pratt. He sounded as slick and smooth as he had last night when he’d politely refused to answer their questions. But he wasn’t in a holding cell now. He was here in Catherine’s office. Holy shit. Starr’s first instinct was to call Pearson, but he was miles away at police headquarters. She could go out to her car and get her gun, but what if he heard her or did something to Catherine while she was out of the building? She did a quick scan of the room, and settled on a large vase with a dried flower arrangement. She carefully extracted the flowers, hefted the vase on her shoulder, and tiptoed toward Catherine’s office, but before she reached the door she heard a loud cry followed by sounds of a scuffle. Being careful was no longer a priority, and Starr rushed toward the sounds, vase over her head, ready to be launched in Catherine’s defense.
But when she entered the room, it took her a moment to process the scene. Pratt was lying on the floor next to an overturned chair, bleeding from a large gash on his face, apparently unconscious. Catherine was a few feet away, bent down and reaching for a gun on the floor. She looked up and met Starr’s eyes.
Starr looked away for a second to make sure Pratt was still down before asking Catherine, “Are you okay?”
“Yes, but you should leave.”
Starr looked at the gun, at Pratt, and back at Catherine, and the pieces clicked into place. She saw Catherine reach for the gun again. “Wait.”
“Starr, this doesn’t concern you.”
“It does.” She injected calm she didn’t feel into her voice. She set the vase down and reached for her phone. “I’m going to call for help. Pearson will be right here, and he’ll arrest Pratt.”
Catherine looked at the gun and back at Starr. “They already did that. It didn’t take.”
“That’s my fault. I acted prematurely. If I’d been more thorough, followed the rules, we could’ve made the charges stick.”
“I need you to leave because you can’t be here for what I’m about to do.”
“You want to kill him. You think I don’t understand that urge, but you’re wrong.” Starr read surprise in Catherine’s eyes, and she seized on it to try to distract her. “I want to kill him too. It would be easier if people like Pratt didn’t exist at all. I have a great conviction rate, but the defendants who walked are the ones I remember the most. The ones that keep me up at night.” She risked taking a step closer to Catherine. “After what you’ve been through, I can only imagine how you would want to absolutely destroy him.”
“Then you must know that I have to do this, and you can’t stop me.”
Starr heard the hard edge in Catherine’s voice and hated the man who had put it there just like she hated everything Catherine had had to endure, and with that realization came the confidence she would do anything in her power to protect Catherine, to keep her safe. The intimacy they’d shared was only a taste of what they could have together, and she was hungry for more. She would not stand in Catherine’s way, but she had to fight for a chance at a future with her. She raised her hands in the air.
“I won’t stop you. If you want to kill him, I’ll stand here and watch you do it. I’ll tell Pearson you did it in self-defense. I’ll keep your secret until my dying day.” She took a breath to steady her voice. “But, Catherine, I know in my soul that killing him will wreck you. You’ve spent your entire career fighting to make sure justice is done, and while right now, in this moment, you may think that killing him is just, you know in your heart it isn’t. He deserves to be punished, and I will do everything in my power to see that he is, but if you take on the role of executioner, you will die inside because you are not a killer. You’re not like him. I couldn’t have fallen in love with you if you were.”
She stopped abruptly at the surprised expression on Catherine’s face. She’d surprised herself by the admission, but now that the words were out, she had no regrets. She had fallen in love with Catherine, with her fierce independence and strength, and she prayed she would get a chance to see her feelings through.
“Do you mean it?” Catherine asked.
“I absolutely do,” Starr said.
At that moment, Russell Pratt grunted and started to sit up. Starr saw Catherine flick a glance at the gun, and then back at her. She shook her head and delivered a swift kick to what she hoped was Pratt’s kidney. He groaned and curled up in a ball, while Starr ran over, grabbed the gun in one hand, and put her arm around Catherine. “Let’s call Pearson and get this piece of shit back behind bars.”
Chapter Twenty
Starr pulled the car alongside the curb and cut the engine. “Are you sure you’re up for this?”
Catherine looked up into her eyes, and Starr was touched by the strength she saw reflected there. It had been a month since Pratt’s rearrest, but Catherine had dealt with every aspect of the case like a heroine instead of a victim.
“I promise, I’m good,” Catherine said. “I want to do this.”
“Okay, but if you change your mind, we’re out of here.”
As they climbed the steps to Mayor Turner’s front door, Starr reflected on how much had changed since she was last here. The lack of urgency was the first thing that she noted. Russell Pratt had plead guilty and was awaiting sentencing, and Hannah Turner was safe at home, although Starr knew from experience in the child abuse unit that Hannah’s life would never be quite the same. This time the idea to visit had come from the mayor, and curiosity caused them both to comply with the request. Linda Turner opened the door before they could knock.
“Thank you for coming.” She reached out a hand to Catherine and welcomed them both in. “I know you’ve been through a lot.”
Catherine nodded, and Starr gently pressed her hand in the small of Catherine’s back as a show of support.
“I’m glad to see you under different circumstances,” Catherine said.
“Most definitely.” The mayor ushered them back to the den and invited them to sit. “Would either of you like some tea or coffee, or anything at all really?”
Starr cleared her throat. “I don’t want to appear rude, but I think we’re both very curious about why we’re here.”
“I’ve always admired your ability to cut to the chase.” Linda folded her hands in her lap. “I have two matters to discuss. The first one involves you directly, so I’ll start there. Starr, I would like to pledge my support to your campaign for district attorney.”
Starr flicked a glance at Catherine who raised her eyebrows. They’d had several discussions about their future, but in all of them Starr had insisted she was done with the political side of criminal justice. She’d settled on continuing her work as a career prosecutor, in the trenches, where she felt she could do the most good. Catherine told her she supported whatever she chose to do but had encouraged her not to abandon her dreams too quickly.
“I appreciate your offer, Madam Mayor, but I’ve
decided not to run.”
Linda brushed the air with her hand as if she could erase Starr’s words from existence. “Call me, Linda. Both of you. And as for you not running, well, that would be a travesty. If it wasn’t for you, Russell Pratt would be a free man. Murphy’s gotten too gun-shy, pardon the term, and that first assistant of his, Nelson, is cut from the same cloth. We need new blood. Someone creative who is willing to take risks, when it matters, to see that justice is done.”
Starr reflected that this was the first time in her career she was actually being praised for skirting the rules, but she wanted to make sure credit went where it was due. “The truth is, Catherine here is the reason Russell Pratt is in custody. She risked her life to take him down.”
“I’m aware, but since I doubt Ms. Landauer has any interest in running for public office, you’ll have to do.” Linda grinned. “Seriously, Starr, the party has already conducted polling, and you’re easily the front runner. I’m merely taking the side of a winner. It’s an easy decision.” She glanced purposefully at the two of them seated so close together. “And not to be a total political hack, but if Catherine is by your side during the election, it’s only going to boost your numbers.”
Starr shook her head. “There’s absolutely no way I would use the press about Catherine’s case to try to win an election.”
“You don’t have to. The press is already there. And for the record, I was referring to the fact that you make a stunning couple.”
Starr looked at Catherine who merely smiled and shook her head. Linda was right—they did make a stunning couple, but Starr didn’t believe that was the sole motivation for endorsement. “I’ve already made up my mind.” Starr turned to Catherine. “It’s the best thing for both of us. Right?”
Catherine inclined her head. “Are you asking for my honest answer?”
“Of course.”
“There was a time when I thought your methods were a bit, shall we say, questionable. That you’d do just about anything to win a case, even if you wound up trampling on a defendant’s rights.”
“And now?”
“And now, I think it’s possible that I was viewing you through a jaded lens, based on my own experience. What I know now is that you are incredibly passionate about getting justice for the victims you represent. You’re not perfect, but you care, and you care deeply. About people. Someone like Nelson only cares about clearing cases and winning stats. The citizens of Travis County deserve better than that.” Catherine reached over and grabbed her hand. “They deserve someone like you.”
Starr met Catherine’s eyes and, in that moment, she knew she’d do anything and everything Catherine wanted her to do. She opened her mouth to answer the mayor, when she heard a voice behind them.
“Mom, Sally said you wanted to see me.”
She turned to see Hannah Turner standing in the doorway. Unlike the photo they’d shown around when she was missing, this version of Hannah was somber, more somber than a young girl should be, a natural consequence of what she’d been through. Starr had had very little interaction with her since she’d turned up. Pam had worked with Hannah before her grand jury testimony, and although all Hannah had to offer was circumstance and an ID of Pratt’s voice, her testimony, along with Catherine’s had been sufficient enough to indict Pratt on some serious charges, including the murder of Catherine’s mother, that would keep him behind bars the rest of his life.
“Hi, Hannah,” Linda said, beckoning her to enter. “There’s a couple of people here I want you to meet.” She pointed to Starr. “This is Ms. Rio. She works for the DA’s office, and she helped look for you when you were missing.” She turned to Catherine. “And this is Ms. Landauer. She…” Her voice faltered, and she turned to Catherine. “I’m sorry, but I just realized how rude it is of me not to have checked with you about this first, but I was hoping maybe you and Hannah could talk about, well…”
Starr raised a hand to protest. If she’d known she was bringing Catherine here for an ambush, she never would’ve agreed, but Catherine answered before she could get her words out.
“I’d love to talk to you, Hannah. Any chance I could get you to show me your room?”
Starr watched as Hannah’s eyes brightened for a second and then dimmed again. “I guess.”
Catherine stood. “Excellent. Your mom and Ms. Rio have a lot to talk about. Show me the way.”
Starr watched her walk away, more in awe of Catherine than she’d thought possible.
“She’s amazing,” Linda said.
“She is.”
“She’ll make a great asset on the campaign trail.”
“I haven’t decided yet,” Starr said, but Catherine’s little speech from before echoed loud, and she knew she was leaning toward a run.
“You have some time still. I’m confident you’ll make the right decision.”
Starr stared at the doorway Catherine and Hannah had just passed through. She’d already made one very excellent decision and that was admitting she’d fallen in love with Catherine. Should she try her luck again?
* * *
Catherine followed Hannah into her room and pretended she was seeing it for the first time. Hannah pointed at the bed. “You can sit there if you want.”
“Thanks,” Catherine said, setting aside one of the pillows to make room.
“Mom says that the same man who took me took you when you were little.”
“That’s true. I was around the same age as you. Obviously, since I’m old now, it was a long time ago.” She offered a small grin, hoping a tinge of levity would score her some points.
Hannah returned the grin, but after a few seconds, it faded. “Why did he do it?”
Because he’s crazy? Because he could? Catherine could opine all day about the motivations of Russell Pratt, but at the end of the day, she was only left with more questions than answers. “I wish I knew. There are some people who think the rules don’t apply to them and they do things that don’t make sense to the rest of us. That guy? He’s one of those people.” She smoothed the quilt on the bed. “I’m sorry about what happened to you.”
“I’m sorry about what happened to you too.”
“Thanks. Like I said, it was a long time ago.”
“How long?”
“Over twenty years.”
Hannah kicked at the carpet with the toe of her sneaker. “Does it still bother you?”
“I wish I could say no, but it does sometimes. I go see someone to talk about it when it gets bad.”
“Like a shrink?”
Catherine hid her surprise at the frank question and answered in kind. “Yep. It helps.”
“Mom wants me to see one. Maybe I will.”
“I’m no shrink, but if you ever want to talk, I’m here for you.”
“Thanks. Mom wants me to tell her everything, but when I start to talk, she gets upset, and I know it sounds selfish, but then we wind up talking about her feelings…Was your mom like that?”
Catherine reached out a hand and Hannah clasped her fingers. Her aunt had been the same. And as for Hannah’s question about her mother, she decided telling Hannah that Pratt had killed her mother would defeat the purpose of telling her she got where Hannah was coming from. “Everyone was like that for a while. It’s hard to understand unless you’ve been through something like this yourself.” She looked Hannah straight in the eyes. “I mean it. You can call me anytime.”
Hannah nodded soberly. They talked for a few more minutes about how surreal it was to reenter normal life after what they’d both gone through. The conversation felt natural, and Catherine found it easy to share feelings with Hannah she’d rarely shared with anyone else. When they finally went back downstairs to where Starr and Linda Turner were waiting, Catherine’s heart ached for the painful memories this little girl would carry with her for the rest of her life. Her only comfort came from knowing that Hannah wasn’t alone because she had family and a community that cared about her and who had surrounded her w
ith love and protection.
Catherine’s mind strayed to Doris who’d fussed over her since Pratt’s arrest, Jack Pearson who stopped by the office on a weekly basis ostensibly just to check in, and her friends from law school, Lisa and Pam, who’d worked at the courthouse with her all these years without knowing her past, but now that they did, they’d banded together to make sure she knew she had friends she could confide in. For the first time in her life, Catherine knew she too had a family and community that cared about her, and the most important member of her circle was Starr, who’d saved her life by convincing her it wasn’t worth throwing away to seek revenge, who loved her unconditionally, and with whom Catherine couldn’t imagine living without. As she descended the last step, she took Starr’s hand, not caring about appearances or elections or conflicts of interest. She leaned close to Starr and whispered, “Are you ready to go, Ms. DA?”
Starr’s eyes darkened. “Yes, please.”
Once they were back in the car, Catherine asked Starr to take her to Jo’s.
“Are you craving coffee?” Starr asked as she placed the key in the ignition.
“I’m craving you, but I want to talk first, and I’m scared if we go right back to my place, there will be no talking.”
“Sounds ominous.” Starr didn’t start the car, instead turning in her seat to face Catherine. “Don’t you think we’ve had enough ominous lately?”
Catherine smiled at the wistful tone in Starr’s voice and found it hard to remember why she’d wasted any time thinking they had nothing in common. “You’re not at all what I expected you to be.”