“No.”
“Then keep that thing away from me.”
Lizzy sighed and put the stethoscope back in her medical bag. “I don’t suppose you’ll let me take your pulse, either.”
“You think I don’t know why you’ve been clutching my wrist every few minutes since you walked in the door?” Harlan grumbled. “If you haven’t found the pulse by now, I must be dead.”
Lizzy resigned herself to getting a complete picture of her father’s medical condition from his doctor and not firsthand. She leaned over his bed and hugged him, relieved by the strength with which he hugged her back.
“What’re you checking for now?” he grumbled as he released her.
“That was a daughterly hug, nothing more,” she reassured him.
He regarded her warily. “You sure about that?”
“Absolutely.”
“Okay, then. Sit down here and tell me what you’ve been up to. Don’t leave out any of the juicy stuff, either. Have you found yourself a man yet?”
She should have known it wouldn’t take long to get to the subject nearest and dearest to his heart. “Daddy, not every woman needs a man in her life,” she explained for the thousandth time, even though she knew she was wasting her breath.
“Don’t give me that feminist hogwash. How’re you going to give me any grandbabies if you don’t find a man?”
“Maybe I’ll just have them on my own,” she taunted because she knew it would irritate him. Clearly, he was well enough to argue. He was probably well enough to be out of bed, too. His wife Janet had hinted that he was playing invalid just to entice his baby to stay around a little longer. If his doctor confirmed that, Lizzy was going to drag him out of bed by force and put him on a regimen of exercise that would have him pleading for mercy.
She shot him a deliberately innocent look and added, “I think I’d make a terrific single mom, don’t you?”
“Over my dead body!” he shouted.
“You keep losing your cool like that, and you will be dead,” she informed him mildly.
His gaze narrowed. “You said that on purpose, didn’t you?”
Lizzy grinned. “Yep.”
“Daggone it, girl. You know my heart’s weak.”
“I don’t know that,” she reminded him plaintively. “You won’t let me check it.”
He scowled at her, then said casually, “Cody saw Hank Robbins the other day.”
“Really?” Getting that word out without betraying any emotion was harder than tangling with her daddy over the state of his health.
“He said Hank was asking about you.”
Lizzy’s heart did a little tap dance of its own. “Oh? How is he?”
“Getting along right good,” Harlan said. He shot her a sly look. “Cody says he’s thinking of getting married and settling down.”
This time her heart plummeted straight to her toes. “Married?”
“You sound surprised. Ranch life’s a whole lot easier if there’s a woman you love by your side. Besides, he’s not getting any younger. I’m sure he wants kids.”
“I suppose,” she said as her heart thudded dully. “Who’s he marrying?”
“I didn’t say he had anyone special in mind, just that he was thinking of it.”
Lizzy stared at her father’s innocent expression and chuckled. She should have known he was up to something. “You did that on purpose, didn’t you?”
He grinned. “Yep. Worked, too.” His expression sobered. “Why don’t you just break down and see the man, Lizzy my girl? You know you want to. You were always crazy about him. For a few years there, you were thick as thieves. It made me hope that you’d settle down right next door. I never did figure out what happened between the two of you.”
“Nothing happened.” Which, of course, was the whole point. She stood up and leaned down to kiss her father’s weathered cheek. “Stop manipulating, Daddy. I’d already planned to see Hank while I’m here.”
His expression brightened. “Whooee! It’s about time you showed some sense.”
“Daddy! Don’t make too much of this.”
“Okay, okay. You going to see him today?”
“I don’t know when I’m going to see him.”
“Don’t waste too much time. Spring break’s short.” He regarded her wistfully. “Or were you thinking of sticking around?”
“Daddy,” she pleaded.
“Okay, okay,” he said again. “I’m an old man. I’m allowed to indulge in a little wishful thinking.”
“Don’t pull that old-man garbage with me. You’re going to outlive all of us. You’re too ornery not to.”
“Sooner or later, age catches up with all of us.” He caught her hand in his and clung to it. “Don’t let life pass you by, Lizzy. I know you love medicine, but I know something else, too. You’ve always had a soft spot in your heart for that man up the road. Don’t pretend you don’t, not with me. I’m just saying whatever you do, don’t wake up one day with regrets.”
“I told you I was going to see him, didn’t I?”
“No need to get defensive, darling girl. I can’t help doing a little prodding. It’s my nature.”
Lizzy sighed. “It surely is.” She leaned down and planted a kiss on his forehead. “Now, get some rest and leave Hank Robbins to me.”
Harlan Adams grinned, the color in his cheeks getting better every second. “Something tells me the poor man doesn’t stand a chance.”
“Maybe you’re overestimating my charm. Hank didn’t have a bit of trouble saying goodbye when I went off to Austin to college or down to Miami for med school.”
“Maybe he was just wise enough to let you go after what you wanted. That’s not the kind of thing you should blame a man for. In fact, maybe you ought to take a good hard look at what it cost him to let you leave.”
Lizzy touched a finger to his lips to silence him. “You’re overselling, Daddy. I already know what a paragon of virtue Hank Robbins is. I fell for the man when I was sixteen years old and he bought the old Simmons place. Nothing’s changed in the eight years since.”
“Then what are you waiting for, girl? Go find him and tell him straight-out what you want.”
“I suppose you know what that is, too,” she said, wishing she had so few doubts. Loving Hank had been complex enough years ago. Now, with medical school convincing her that she’d chosen exactly the right career for herself, loving him had gotten a whole lot more complicated.
“You want a husband and babies,” her father said without hesitation.
“If only it were that simple,” Lizzy murmured.
“What was that?”
“You left out medicine, Daddy. I want to be a doctor, too.”
“So? You won’t be the first doctor to get married and have babies.”
“You seem to forget that I have to finish medical school, an internship and my residency. Do you think Hank’s going to wait all that time? You’ve already said he’s in a hurry to have a family.”
“Darlin’ girl, that’s what compromise is all about.”
Lizzy hooted at that. “What do you know about compromise?”
“Hey, your mama and I don’t agree on every little thing. We work things out.”
“I’ll remind you of that the next time you’re trying to bully her into letting you have your way.” She squeezed his hand again. “Now get some sleep. I’ll be back to see you later.”
“After you’ve seen Hank, right?”
Lizzy rolled her eyes and left the room without answering. She found her mother lurking in the hallway.
“How much did you hear?” Lizzy asked.
“Enough to know that he’s trying to marry you off before you go back to school,” her mother said with a rueful smile. “Thank you for not arguing with him too ferociously.”
“What would be the point? He knows I want to see Hank. He’s just trying to make sure I do it on his timetable. There’s nothing new about that.”
“No, that’s your father, all right. When he gets an idea into his head, he can’t wait to set it into motion.”
“That’s how he got you to marry him, isn’t it?” Lizzy reminded her. “He wheedled and cajoled and finally wore you down.”
Janet Runningbear Adams chuckled. “It wasn’t a case of wearing me down,” she insisted. “I fell in love with him too quick for that to be necessary. I just held out to keep him on his toes.”
“That’s not the way Jenny tells it,” Lizzy said. “She says the two of them had to conspire to get you to walk down the aisle.”
Janet winked. “And I’ve always let them think that. It gives me a good bit of leverage around here. Now come on into the living room and tell me all about school and Miami. Did you know I went there a couple of times when I was married the first time and living in New York? Jenny’s father liked to go there on vacation, but from all I’ve read, it’s changed a lot over the years. In those days, there were still old people rocking on the porches of those hotels in South Beach. Now, if the pictures I see are to be believed, the place has been overrun with sexy models in bathing suits and in-line skates.”
Lizzy grinned. “That’s not so far off, but can we talk about it at supper? I’d like to go for a ride. It’s been way too long since I’ve been on a horse.”
“Of course it can wait. Are you going to see Hank?”
“You, too?”
“Sorry.” Her mother studied her intently. “Well, are you?”
Lizzy shrugged. “I’m not sure. I suppose I’ll make up my mind while I’m riding.”
“Well, in case you decide that the answer’s yes, Cody tells me Hank is working in his south pasture today. You know, the one that conveniently butts up against ours. I believe he’s replacing a fence that Cody swears was just fine the last time he checked it.”
“I’ll remember that.”
“Be back by suppertime,” her mother reminded her. “The whole family’s coming for dinner to welcome you home.”
“I’ll be back,” Lizzy promised.
“Bring Hank, if you like.”
“If I see him.”
“Oh, something tells me you’ll see him,” her mother said. “Can I just add one piece of advice to whatever your daddy’s been telling you?”
Lizzy paused in the doorway. “What?”
“This isn’t a game, Mary Elizabeth. While you’ve been gone, the rest of us have been left to watch Hank. The man’s been miserable without you, but he’s gotten by. Unless you’re really sure about what you want, don’t start something up with him.”
Lizzy looked her mother squarely in the eye. “I was never the one who was unsure, Mom. Hank didn’t just let me go. He practically pushed me out the door. You all seem so all-fired sure that he wants me, but he’s never once given me any evidence of that. How come nobody seems worried that I’m the one who’s going to wind up hurt?”
“Because you’ve always been able to pick yourself up and dust yourself off, just the way the song says. And maybe because you’re the one who’s going to walk away in a couple of weeks.” She gave Lizzy a penetrating look. “Aren’t you?”
“Yes,” Lizzy said quietly. No matter how things turned out when she saw Hank Robbins again, she was going to be on that flight back to Miami. She sighed heavily. “Maybe I won’t go for that ride this afternoon, after all. I think I’ll go on up to my room and unpack. I’ve got some thinking to do.”
“The answers aren’t in your room,” her mother argued. “Something tells me they’re out in Hank’s south pasture.”
Lizzy grinned at her beautiful mother. Janet Runningbear Adams’s Native American ancestry had grown more pronounced as the years lined her face. Her straight black hair was streaked with gray now, but her eyes sparkled with intelligence and wisdom.
“Now who’s trying to manipulate me?” Lizzy teased. “You’ve been with Daddy way too long.” Her expression sobered. “He really is going to be all right, isn’t he?”
Her mother met her gaze evenly. “If he takes it easy and stops sneaking into the kitchen for ice cream when I’m not looking. I’m thinking of having the refrigerator padlocked.”
“It won’t do a bit of good. He’ll just find somebody in the family who’ll sneak things in for him.”
“You’re probably right. I caught Harlan Patrick taking cigars up to him the other day. He swore he’d just forgotten to take them out of his pocket, but Cody’s boy never could lie worth a darn. You should have heard your daddy when he found out I’d confiscated the things.”
“When did Daddy start smoking cigars?”
“When he found out he shouldn’t. He puffs on one every now and again just because he knows it makes me furious.”
Lizzy chuckled. “He does know how to rile you, doesn’t he?”
“Oh my, yes.”
“Mom, I’m sorry I wasn’t here when he got sick and that I couldn’t get back right away.”
“Oh, sweetie, don’t feel bad about that. You have a right to live your life. And neither of us wanted you to take time off from your studies when we knew everything was going to turn out fine. Of course, your father and I both wish you were closer to home and that we could see you more often, but we’re proud of you. Taking on medical school is a big deal. We know you’re going to be a fine doctor.”
Lizzy thought of the grades she’d gotten on her last exams. “I wish I had your confidence.”
Her mother regarded her with concern. “Troubles with your classes?”
“Nothing to worry about,” Lizzy reassured her. “I’ll get a grip on things once I get back.”
“I’m sure you will. Now, go. If you’re not going for a ride, get some rest before supper. You’ll need it to fend off all the nosy questions. Your brothers and Jenny may complain about Harlan’s meddling ways, but they’ve inherited the tendency.”
Lizzy retreated to her room, which remained exactly as she had left it, with the ruffled curtains and rodeo posters, an admittedly incongruous mix that pretty much summed up her personality.
Instead of unpacking, though, she went straight to the window seat and settled back against the mound of pillows, staring out across the rugged terrain, imagining Hank out there somewhere, his skin bronzed by the sun and glistening with sweat.
Tomorrow, she thought. Tomorrow she would face him and find out if anything at all had changed between them. With luck she wouldn’t be able to stand the sight of him. She sighed at the improbability of that. With better luck, he would sweep her into his arms and tell her he couldn’t live without her. Now that, probable or not, was something worth waiting for.
2
A man could only mend the same fence so many times without looking like a darned fool, Hank thought as the sun beat down on his bare back. Cody Adams had passed by twice the day before just to get in a few taunts about the obviousness of his activity and to keep him updated on Lizzy’s whereabouts.
Even if Cody hadn’t told him, though, Hank was pretty sure he would have known the precise instant Lizzy was back at White Pines. He could feel her presence. The air seemed to crackle with the electricity of it. And that old familiar ache in the region of his heart started up again.
“Just come to dinner at White Pines tonight,” Cody had suggested. “You know you’d be welcome. The whole family will be there.”
“I know that,” Hank said.
He liked the whole Adams clan, from Harlan on down. They’d always made him feel like one of them. The littlest rascals in the family were so used to his presence, they had even taken to calling him Uncle Hank. He’d liked the feeling of belonging and he’d enjoyed spending many an evening with them since buying his ranch, but this was different. This time Lizzy wou
ld be there, and he didn’t know what kind of welcome to predict from her, not when they’d parted on such uneasy terms.
“Another time,” he said, covering his regret.
“She won’t be here forever,” Cody had reminded him. “And we have a bet.”
“It’s her first day home. There will be time for me to make good on that ridiculous bet.”
Call it masculine pride or sheer muleheadedness, but what he didn’t say was that he wanted Lizzy to come to him, that he wanted to know that she’d missed him at least enough to finally seek him out.
Oh, he knew as sure as shooting that she’d been avoiding him all these years. He’d seen the flush of embarrassment in her cheeks after she’d kissed him on the eve of her departure for college. He’d also seen the quick rise of anger and pride when he hadn’t tried to stop her from leaving. She’d been so sure he would, so confident that that kiss would make a difference. He’d seen that, too.
Little did she know what letting her go had cost him. That unexpected kiss had turned him inside out. No woman had ever made him want so much. And no woman had ever been so far out of reach. The distance was far greater than the miles between Los Piños and Austin or even the miles between home and Miami. They were separated by their dreams.
His were simple. He wanted a wife and children and a small ranching operation that he could take pride in having built from the ground up. The Triple Bar was his. There was no history or conditions tied to it, the way there would have been if he’d stayed at his daddy’s place. In that, he was a whole lot like Luke Adams, the oldest of Harlan’s sons.
Lizzy’s hopes and ambitions were more complex and all-encompassing. Harlan Adams had laid the world at the feet of his baby daughter, and she had embraced it all. Hank wasn’t sure she could ever be happy with a life as quiet and self-contained as the one he could offer.
He knew—he had always known—that he wanted more from her than a brief, passionate fling. And for that, she had to come to him in her own time, on her own terms. He’d long ago accepted the fact that she might never come at all.
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