“Look, I agree to the grounding.” Not that they’d asked her opinion. “But banning Halloween seems harsh.” Tank had just said two minutes ago how important Halloween was to her.
“Punishments aren’t supposed to be easy. On kids...or parents. I don’t like this either, but she made her choice today.” His tone softened. “Look, you know life wasn’t easy on me as a kid, and I made choices in the past that weren’t always the best. Kaia has the good fortune of having three people in her life who can guide her, help her make the right decisions. We need to stay strong with her, now more than ever. This shit’s not going to get easier as she gets older,” Tank said, touching her shoulder. “And I’m sorry if I seemed to suggest that you might be having an influence on her.”
Montana nodded, accepting the apology, but the unsettling feeling in the pit of her gut told her that maybe Tank was right.
She wanted only the best for her daughter; therefore, maybe there did need to be some changes in their relationship.
From now on, mother first, friend second.
* * *
“HEY, DANGER, IF YOU chop any harder, you’re going to pierce the cutting board,” Eddie said, as he wheeled his chair into his kitchen and gently took the knife from Montana. He turned her to face him. “What’s going on?” She’d seemed on edge since she’d arrived an hour before with a bag of groceries to make the Grilled Chile-Cilantro Chicken he’d taught her to make. She hadn’t wanted to talk about it, but clearly she was upset.
She sighed. “It’s Kaia.”
“She okay?” Eddie knew that the little girl had been different since returning from camp, but Montana hadn’t said much about it in days.
“She skipped class yesterday,” she said.
“That’s not like her. Where did she go?”
“The mall.”
“With other kids?”
“By herself.”
“Okay, that’s a little concerning.”
Montana looked pensive. “Which part?”
“All of it, but the by herself thing is probably the thing I’d be most concerned about,” he said.
“Right, ’cause all kids cut class sometimes.” Montana shrugged, but he could see an internal battle going on in her brain, as though she was questioning her own take on the subject.
“I didn’t,” he said.
“Shocking,” she said, swiping a dish towel at him. “I guess I’m worried that maybe I’m not a great influence on her.”
“Bullshit. Did Tank say that?” Didn’t sound like something the man would say, but if Kaia was acting out, Tank might be looking for a reason or excuse to try to make sense of it or deal with it.
“Not in those exact words...and he did apologize after for implying it, but it’s been nagging me ever since that maybe he’s right. I’m not exactly the most disciplinary when it comes to Kaia. I let her get away with everything, really, and at first, I didn’t see anything wrong with her cutting class.”
She looked genuinely disappointed in herself, and Eddie took her hand and pulled her down onto his lap. “Hey, don’t beat yourself up over that. There are a ton of different parenting styles. Not one is better than the other, and Kaia is benefiting from having you in her life.” So was he, but that was a conversation for another time. “And it’s natural to question yourself. That’s a sign of a good parent,” he said, touching her cheek.
“I just don’t want to mess things up, you know? Cass and Tank were raising her just fine before I showed up, and I can’t deny the coincidental change in attitude.”
He kissed her forehead. “Things are different for her now. She’s adjusting and probably trying to pit the three of you against one another to get what she wants sometimes. See how far she can push you. But just keep setting boundaries, and she’ll be fine.”
“How do you know so much about parenting?”
“I don’t. But I know she has a mother who is sacrificing a lot to be here for her. A mother who would do anything for her and who loves her—and goes to bat for her even when she makes a mistake. Believe me, that will mean a lot to her even if, in the end, you still decide that Tank’s right in his punishment.”
Montana released a deep breath and cuddled into his chest. “How do you always know the right thing to say to make me feel better?” she asked, her gaze burning into his.
Because he cared about her more and more each day and he’d do anything to bring a smile back to her face. Because he respected the sacrifices she was making to be there for her daughter and he admired all the strength and determination in her. Because the fiery passion she ignited in him gave him clarity into who she truly was and he was falling in love with every part of her. But he’d promised himself he’d take it slow for both their sakes, so his expression gave way to a teasing grin as he held back the things he wanted to say to her and instead simply said, “I was just trying to save my very expensive cutting board.”
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
KAIA STRUGGLED UNDER the weight of the massive pumpkin as they waited for the elevator the following week. Montana balanced two smaller ones in her arms. “I hope you know how to do this,” she told Kaia.
Kaia looked at her in shock. “You’ve never carved a pumpkin before?”
“Never.” And she wouldn’t be now, except that it was the first thing in a long time that had gotten an excited reaction out of Kaia. Montana would even don a costume if it meant finally drawing the little girl out of the shell she’d retreated into since returning from camp. Unfortunately, any chance of using Halloween as a way to connect with Kaia had been lessened since she was grounded and would have to miss the festivities. But, they could still carve the pumpkins, Montana had reasoned at the grocery store.
“My parents didn’t really get into any traditions and holidays,” she explained. Even before her sister died, their family didn’t put a lot of emphasis on celebrating things the way other families did. Even Thanksgiving and Christmas weren’t a big deal. Her mother was an only child, raised by an unconventional mother—Montana’s skydiving, thrill-seeking grandmother—and her father was estranged from his family because they were Mormon, and with his younger, adventurous streak, he’d decided to leave the community at age eighteen. Growing up, it had been only the four of them together most of the time. Then the three of them after Dani died.
“But you went trick or treating, right?” Kaia asked. “Your parents didn’t stop you from doing that.”
Damn, this topic had taken a turn a lot quicker than she’d expected. She’d had a feeling the little girl would try to get her to change Tank’s mind about allowing her to go trick or treating, but Montana was adamant that she would stick to Tank’s rules, no matter how strict she thought them to be.
That was why Kaia had agreed to this whole pumpkin-carving idea. She was trying to bait her. Eddie was right—Kaia really was testing the waters.
For now, Montana would avoid getting pulled into the tougher conversation. Maybe if Kaia had fun that evening, she’d start to open up. All of their prodding and questioning and disciplining her recent crappy attitude and decision-making certainly wasn’t working. She’d try a new approach. “Nope. No trick or treating, either,” she said simply, pretending not to catch the little girl’s drift.
The elevator doors opened, and they got in.
“Dad’s being a jerk,” Kaia blurted out as the doors closed.
Montana of six months ago would have tried to make Kaia feel better by letting the insult of her father slide, but the Montana she was today was quickly learning not to be manipulated by her eleven-year-old. “Well, so are you. Maybe change your attitude and your dad’s will change, too,” she said as lightheartedly as possible.
Kaia’s jaw dropped. But then she gave what some might consider a small grin. “Fair enough.”
Montana did an internal happy dance at the tiny victory. She’d let Kaia know
that she and Tank were a team and she couldn’t run to her complaining about her dad. Problems they could discuss—absolutely. But she wasn’t here to validate any negativity Kaia had about Tank or Cassie. The only way they would survive the teen years was by setting boundaries now.
Wow, those dull parenting books Tank had supplied her with might actually be paying off.
Her cell phone chimed in her pocket, and she struggled to retrieve it, balancing a pumpkin between her hip and the elevator wall.
A text from Lance?
First one since he’d left to train with his team over a month ago. She read quickly:
Missing you a bit lately.
“Wow, that’s romantic,” Kaia said, reading the text behind her.
“Hey! Privacy,” she said, though Kaia’s words had perfectly summed up her thoughts. She tucked the phone away without replying. She hadn’t officially ended things with Lance, though the last time they were together in the hospital should have tipped him off that she was losing interest. And they hadn’t spoken by phone or text or Skype since he’d left, so she’d assumed the conversation to break things off was unnecessary.
“Are you still dating him?” Kaia asked.
“No. Not really. He’s away with his Olympic team, training for winter competitions, so we’ve just let things kinda die off.”
“Does he know that?” she asked pointedly.
“Okay, okay. I’ll be sure to inform him,” Montana said as the doors opened on her floor.
They climbed off the elevator and the smell of cinnamon and pumpkin reached them. Kaia turned to look at her. “Did you bake?”
Montana laughed.
And laughed some more as she unlocked her apartment door. “That would be Eddie,” she said, and just saying his name had her cheeks flushing slightly. The two of them had been practically inseparable that past week when Montana wasn’t at work or with Kaia, but she hadn’t told anyone about them yet. She wasn’t sure how to define what was happening between them, and part of her liked keeping things a secret for now. It made it even more fun and exciting.
But Kaia caught the flushed cheeks. “Oh, my God. Have you and Eddie finally...?”
“Finally what?” she asked. Had mind-blowing sex? Absolutely. Discussed when they would do it again? Not quite. Since the first time had been so impulsive and after an intense skydiving experience, they both seemed slightly unsure if they should keep doing it or move back a few paces to a more natural dating progression. Dinner at his place every night usually resulted in lots of making out and talking. And cuddling and more making out. That was as far as they’d gone since the first time, but Montana was definitely ready for more.
“Netflix and chilled,” Kaia said with a grin.
How the hell did she know what that meant? And no, they hadn’t watched anything on Netflix. But this wasn’t a conversation she was going to have with her daughter. “No, we did not,” she answered. It wasn’t a lie. “But we might have started to see one another...sort of.”
She opened the door and went inside, but Kaia wasn’t behind her. “Kaia?” She went back out into the hall just as Eddie opened his apartment door.
“Hi,” he said to Kaia, then a secret little smile was sent her way.
Damn, the flush turned into full-blown flames coursing through her. He looked hot in a pair of jeans and tight fitting T-shirt. His hair was messy, the way it was after each heavy make-out session after she’d run her hands through it.
“Hey, Eddie. Mom and I were wondering if you’d like to come over and carve pumpkins with us.”
They were? Montana’s heart raced. She and Eddie had just moved into new territory they hadn’t yet defined. Friends with benefits? They hadn’t really had a second date outside the apartment, if the first could even be labeled as a date. It was more like a kidnapping. She wasn’t sure how she felt about him hanging out with her and her daughter together, though the smell of pumpkin pie coming from his apartment suggested he might be better at this pumpkin-carving thing than she was, and it would definitely be fun...
“Right, Mom?” Kaia asked when she hadn’t said anything.
“Yeah. I mean, if you’re not busy, you’re welcome to join us.” Why was she feeling like a shy, tongue-tied schoolgirl all of a sudden? They’d jumped out of a plane together—naked.
Eddie, too, looked slightly hesitant.
Of course. He’d just had sex with her. That didn’t mean he was ready to jump into stepdad role. She wanted to reassure him that was the last thing this was but wasn’t sure how to say it, especially in front of Kaia, in a way that sounded casual and noncommittal but also not opposed. Because she wasn’t. Which was absolutely terrifying to her, so it would most definitely have him running for the hills. Her thoughts ricocheted, and she reined them back in. “You don’t have to,” she said.
“Well, I am skilled with a pumpkin-carving tool,” he said, moving away from the door to let them see the row of pumpkins he’d already carved in his own apartment. “Had a lot of time on my hands,” he said with a wink. “Just give me a sec to get the pies out, and I’ll be right over.”
“Great!” Kaia said, walking past Montana into her apartment. She set her pumpkin down on the living-room coffee table.
Montana closed the door. “What was that?” she asked.
“What? You didn’t want him to come over?” The teasing glint in her daughter’s eyes made her instantly feel better. There was the little girl she recognized—the little shit disturber. “Besides, didn’t you smell that pie? I’m hoping he’ll share.”
Montana laughed, setting down her pumpkins next to Kaia’s and unpacking the stencils and carving tools from the shopping bags.
She was hoping for more than just pie that evening.
* * *
TRYING TO FOCUS on carving a spider into the humongous pumpkin was a challenge when his gaze and attention kept drifting across the table toward Montana. She was butchering a traditional pumpkin face, but he doubted it was from being distracted by him. Probably more lack of skill with the carving tool. He couldn’t believe this was the first time she’d done this.
It also hadn’t escaped him that this was the first time she was celebrating seasonal activities with her daughter. And they’d invited him.
Correction: Kaia had invited him.
But Montana seemed to enjoy having him and his pie there. She was doing more eating than carving.
And despite the initial awkwardness over the invite, he was loving being there as well.
She’d mentioned that Kaia had been withdrawn and distant lately, but the little girl seemed to be having fun that evening. Grossed out by the gooey insides of the pumpkin, she shrieked and reached for a napkin. “So gross!”
“Hey, don’t throw it away. I’ll take it,” he said.
Montana looked at him. “For what? Do you use it in the pie?”
“No. I, uh...” He hesitated, unsure whether to tell her. He didn’t want the pressure of expectation if he still wasn’t ready to go back to work, but this was different—it was just community volunteering. “The station hosts a Haunted Trail event every year, and I said I’d help out. Hence the pumpkins in my apartment. We use them to mark each station along the trail.”
“That’s great,” Montana said casually, but he knew she was trying hard to hide her pleasure that he was taking steps to get back out there and return to the career he loved.
“So, why do you need the pumpkin guts?” Kaia asked, trying to get the mushy, slimy goo off her hands and into a bowl.
“For brains,” he said.
Her eyes widened. “That’s what it was all those years?”
Eddie laughed. “Yep.” He paused. “Hey, now that you know the inside scoop, maybe you’d like to volunteer this year? We need a ton of people to pull it off.” The troopers dragged family members and friends to participate e
very year, but Eddie knew his mother and sister wouldn’t do it. Neither of them were huge fans of Halloween, not appreciating the excuse for people to act crazier than usual. Police calls doubled on Halloween. But that’s why the station held the event—to give people something fun and in the spirit of the season but safe to do instead.
“Really?” Kaia said. “That would be so cool!” She stopped, then her expression turned to disappointment. “But unfortunately, I’m not sure I can.” She stared into her hollowed-out pumpkin. “I’m kinda grounded.”
Shit. He’d forgotten.
Montana cleared her throat. “Well, seeing as how you’d be doing a nice thing, volunteering with the police station...”
And clearly in a place where she couldn’t get into trouble.
“...I’ll talk to your dad about it and see if he will lift the punishment just for that,” Montana said.
Kaia beamed and wrapped her pumpkin-goo-covered hands around Montana’s neck. “Thank you!”
“No guarantees,” Montana warned. “I just said I’ll talk to him, but if he says no, the answer’s no.”
“Okay,” Kaia said, still squeezing her.
Over Kaia’s head, Montana’s gaze met Eddie’s, and the look of gratitude mixed with pure desire had his mouth going dry.
Thank you, she mouthed.
Eddie’s heart raced as he winked at her. As much as he liked her kid, he hoped Kaia wasn’t spending the night that evening.
* * *
HE GOT HIS WISH.
Tank arrived a little after nine to pick Kaia up, and when his gaze landed on Eddie, there was nothing but a knowing smirk on the other guy’s face. “Hey, man. How are you?” he asked. Eddie would definitely be hearing about this—from Tank and just about every dude in Wild River.
He didn’t care.
“I’m great,” he said. More than great, actually. That evening had been the first time since they’d had sex that he and Montana had hung out and had to keep things casual and PG because they had an audience. Oddly enough, the secret looks and casual touches they’d exchanged all evening had been more sexually charged than the full-on make-out sessions they’d been enjoying.
A Sweet Alaskan Fall Page 17