by Lory Lilian
“I know,” answered Elizabeth, smiling back. “From what I have heard, it is a most wonderful place.”
“Oh, did my brother tell you of Pemberley?” Her innocent question made them lift their eyes at the same time; their gazes met, a deep redness spreading over both their faces.
“No, Georgiana; unfortunately, I did not find the opportunity to tell Miss Bennet much about Pemberley.”
“I…I had the pleasure of spending a few days in Mr. Bingley’s house when he resided at Netherfield, and during that time, I heard both Mr. Darcy and Miss Bingley talking of Pemberley. Miss Bingley was very generous in her praise and showed the deepest admiration for the beauties of Pemberley; I am sure she was not exaggerating.”
Elizabeth did not waste the opportunity to search Miss Darcy’s face with great attention when she mentioned Mr. Bingley and his home in Hertfordshire, trying to find a sign of emotion; she found none. However, when she mentioned Miss Bingley, Georgiana’s lips unconsciously lifted in a slight grin. Elizabeth’s smile grew more open, and she almost chuckled.
“Miss Bingley is very generous in her praise,” added Darcy somewhat neutrally, “though she has visited Pemberley on only three occasions. To my recollection, many of its beauties remain unknown to her.”
His statement increased Elizabeth’s amusement, as she was certain it was meant to clarify Miss Bingley’s pretensions of being intimate with the Darcys and their home. She rejoiced in the newly discovered pleasure of talking with him without quite talking, the others not fully understanding the hidden implications of their exchange.
Mrs. Gardiner then offered, “I did not have the pleasure of talking to Miss Bingley about Pemberley, but I can well testify that her praise could not have been exaggerated. Indeed, I do not think I have ever seen a place more happily situated and more beautiful than your home, Mr. Darcy.”
Mr. Darcy’s surprise was even greater than his sister’s was, and he turned to the lady without concealing his eager curiosity. “Mrs. Gardiner, thank you for your approval, but may I dare ask when you visited Pemberley? I do not remember having the pleasure of meeting you before.”
“Indeed we did not meet before, sir. I cannot say I actually visited Pemberley, but I did see it various times when I was younger. And I had the honour of meeting Lady Anne a few times—the most wonderful lady I have ever met.” At their wondrous looks, she smiled and added, “I grew up in Lambton, which is only five miles from Pemberley.”
With increasing surprise did Elizabeth witness Mr. Darcy’s face lighten by a smile more bright than she had ever seen; Miss Darcy could not refrain from asking hastily, “Oh, Mrs. Gardiner…did you really meet my mother?”
“Yes, I did, Miss Darcy. My father had a shop in Lambton, and my mother—who had been a governess before marrying—used to teach the children in Lambton School. Lady Anne was the most fervent supporter and generous patroness of the school; there was nothing needed for the children that she did not provide. She also purchased quite often from my father’s shop, so I had many opportunities to meet her.”
Miss Darcy abruptly left her brother’s side and moved closer to Mrs. Gardiner, listening with such rapt attention to every word that she barely breathed. This change of positions put Elizabeth near Darcy, and as she was listening attentively to her aunt’s words, her heart skipped a beat when her hand brushed against his as they walked. She shivered at their brief touch, barely able to follow what Mrs. Gardiner continued to relate.
“She was very kind, was she not?” asked Georgiana..
“Indeed she was,” agreed Mrs. Gardiner. “And very beautiful, too. I must say, Miss Darcy, you bear a striking resemblance to her.”
“Do I?” Her eyes opened widely in disbelief.
“Yes, most certainly. If I had not the pleasure of being introduced to you and had only seen you from afar, I could still tell with certainty that you were related to her.”
“Thank you, Mrs. Gardiner, but I know I am not at all as beautiful as she was—not hardly so.” The emotion seemed to leave Miss Darcy with little strength, and her last words were mere whispers.
“I must disagree with you in this respect. I am only speaking the truth.”
“I…I am very happy that I met you, Mrs. Gardiner,” was her only reply. Miss Darcy resumed her place on her brother’s arm, and this time she seemed to need his support. Elizabeth’s heart melted as she saw the girl fighting back tears. She dared to lift her eyes to Darcy, only to see the emotions changing his own countenance. She wanted to say something, but she dared not, nor could she find the proper words; even more, the siblings’ closeness and shared comfort proved to Elizabeth that they needed no stranger to help them with their grief.
“Well, Mrs. Gardiner,” spoke the colonel, in an unsuccessful attempt to hide his own emotion, “this meeting has proved to be a wonderful source of surprise for us. It was fortunate that Darcy noticed Miss Bennet as we were about to leave the park. If not for his attention, I would not have recognised her, and we would have missed the pleasure of this delightful meeting.”
“Thank you, sir,” replied Mrs. Gardiner. “The feeling is mutual, I assure you. We are very happy to have met you.”
This new revelation that Mr. Darcy was the one who saw her and acknowledged her presence to the others threw Elizabeth into a new torment. He could have left the park and avoided her; instead, he made the decision to approach her on his own and then introduced her to his sister. What might be the significance of all this?
She felt before she noticed his stare upon her but did not dare to meet his eyes at that moment. She vaguely heard her aunt, together with the colonel and Georgiana, talking about Lambton and Derbyshire. From time to time, his deep voice intervened to add a few words, and the sound startled her each time. Be it from the pleasure of talking about his home or her aunt’s easy and pleasant manners, never had Elizabeth seen Mr. Darcy so open in talking about a subject, and never had his voice sounded so gentle. Nothing in his attitude indicated any sort of disdain for his new acquaintance—one of those whose situation in life he considered so decidedly below his own.
Elizabeth was the only one to remain quiet and disconcerted; her emotions still overwhelmed her. Her eyes were drawn continuously toward Mr. Darcy, and she had to fight the impulse to stare at him. Several times his quick glances met her eyes and locked with them momentarily, colouring her cheeks crimson. Each time their eyes met, he smiled at her—a small, hidden smile—but it was a smile he extended to her nevertheless.
After almost half an hour, they finally reached the exit of the park, and the separation of the parties became inevitable. Elizabeth knew she would likely never see him again, and to her utter shock, she discovered she was already feeling the loss of his company.
She dared lift her eyes only to meet his dark ones staring intensely at her; this time, although cold shivers travelled wildly through her, she did not avert her gaze until hearing the colonel’s voice taking his leave of them.
“Miss Bennet, Mrs. Gardiner, it was a pleasure to meet with you today.” I hope you have your carriage close by; it is very hot—quite unpleasant I might say. If not, I would be glad to accompany you with my carriage.”
“Thank you, Colonel Fitzwilliam, our carriage is waiting.”
“I hope we did not delay you too much, Mrs. Gardiner.” Elizabeth turned to Mr. Darcy. Could she really detect a sort of regret in his voice?
“No indeed, Mr. Darcy. We were in no hurry at all. Mr. Gardiner will return home later this afternoon.”
“Then…if I may…” Miss Darcy stopped for a moment, looking at Mrs. Gardiner, then at her brother, and finally at Elizabeth. “Mrs. Gardiner, I was wondering…our home is nearby in Grosvenor Square. If you are not in a great hurry, would you like to join me for tea? I mean…if you have no other engagements. I would dearly like to resume our earlier conversation.”
She blushed as if suddenly realizing the impetuosity of her invitation. Her eyes turned to her brother as though sh
e were asking for his late agreement. Mrs. Gardiner, surprised and honoured by the invitation, did not formulate an immediate answer, as she was concerned that the master of the house might not be in complete agreement with his sister. She delayed her answer, trying to ascertain her niece’s opinion, but Elizabeth’s cheeks had lost their colour, and she had lowered her eyes.
“Miss Darcy, I thank you for your kind invitation, but we do not want to intrude on such short notice.”
“Oh, no. It is no intrusion at all—quite the contrary. Your company would be a delightful addition.”
Mr. Darcy stepped in. “Mrs. Gardiner, Miss Bennet, please forgive my sister’s insistence. I dare say she surprised me as well; it is not her habit to bestow such impromptu invitations, I assure you.” Darcy’s voice was lightly polite, but the subtle censure of his sister did not go unnoticed by anyone, making Georgiana blush even more. Yet he continued, leaving no room for misunderstanding regarding his opinion. “Indeed it would be a pleasure to have your company longer, but we understand if you have other appointments or, perhaps, feel too tired for a visit.”
Elizabeth felt Darcy’s gaze and dared to lift her eyes to his. She could easily understand his intervention mostly had been meant to ease her discomfort. While assuring her of his approval of his sister’s invitation, he also offered her the opportunity politely to refuse. What his true wish was she could not tell.
She was brought out of her preoccupation by Georgiana’s shy voice.
“Miss Bennet, Mrs. Gardiner, please forgive me. I now realise I have been improper in my insistence.” Her face displayed a deep distress that Elizabeth could not ignore or neglect.
“Miss Darcy, there is no need to apologise. As my aunt said, we are honoured by your invitation. We hesitated only because we were afraid to intrude on your or Mr. Darcy’s schedule. As for us, I believe we have no fixed engagement, have we Aunt?”
“No, indeed.”
“Very well, then; it is settled,” Mr. Darcy hurried to conclude. “We shall tell your coachman to follow us; he will be taken care of by my servants. Please allow me to show you to my house.”
He walked ahead of the group, arm-in-arm with his sister, while the colonel again offered his arms to the other two ladies.
From time to time, both Mr. and Miss Darcy turned their heads as to be certain the rest of the party were following them. Elizabeth could not hide her smile at this somewhat eager gesture, though many questions were still spinning in her head. A few hours earlier, she was certain she would never meet Mr. Darcy again and was quite content as she imagined he would not harbour kind feelings toward her should they meet. She had treated this man abominably in her refusal and misjudged him so grossly that she knew she deserved no kindness from him; yet, his opinion seemed different.
She did not even notice when they stopped in front of an impressive building, and Darcy showed them in.
“Miss Bennet, Mrs. Gardiner, welcome to our home.”
Georgiana entered first, followed by the other two ladies and the gentlemen. Then, just inside the grand hall, as the colonel accompanied Miss Darcy and Mrs. Gardiner, Elizabeth suddenly froze and was unable to go any further. She had no right to be there. She could feel it with every fibre of her body. “You are the last man…”
What am I doing in his house? She felt as though she would not be able to gather her courage to enter. Was it too late to retract her acceptance? Perhaps there was still time to feign tiredness and leave before exposing herself to even more censure. How could she accept his hospitality after everything she had said to him?
By this time, Georgiana and her aunt had entered the salon, and she could hear their voices together with that of the colonel. She startled when she felt Darcy’s presence near her. “Miss Bennet, are you unwell?”
“No sir, I am quite well.”
“Miss Bennet.” He lowered his head a little and unconsciously she lifted her face so their eyes met; she felt her cheeks burning as she waited for him to continue. “Thank you for being so kind to my sister. Indeed, she surprised me. She seemed so open and friendly with you, though she is usually very restrained with strangers. Apparently, it must be a family trait.”
He forced a smile, adding some playfulness to his tone, but her embarrassment increased as she remembered her previous accusations. “Oh…forgive me, I did not mean to—
Before she could answer, he took a step forward and frowned as he continued in earnest: “Miss Bennet, forgive me if I am presuming too much, but I can see you do not feel easy being here. While I can understand my sister’s desire to be in your and Mrs. Gardiner’s delightful company, I hope it did not create any additional distress for you. If you would rather leave, please tell me, and I will find a way to explain it to Georgiana. However, if my presence bothers you, I would gladly allow you to enjoy your visit and remove myself to the library as I have some business needing attention. One word from you and I will comply with your wish.”
His eyes became darker as he spoke, and she felt herself trembling from his nearness. She could not find the words to answer, as she did know what she wanted. Her face and neck flushed with embarrassment as she tried to swallow the sudden lump in her throat. Someone’s voice—or was it her own—whispered, “I should not be here.”
His voice lowered and softened to a caress, while the expression of his eyes changed in a way she had never seen before.
“Miss Bennet, if it is your desire not to be here and you are only here at my sister’s insistence, then allow me to remedy the situation at once.”
“Sir, it is not my desire, but my conviction that I should not be here; I do not deserve your generous hospitality.” She could no longer speak or bear the intensity of his gaze, and she was angry with him for forcing her to humiliate herself to such an extent.
“You do not deserve my hospitality? Miss Bennet, never has my hospitality been more happily or more deservedly bestowed upon a guest—of that, you may be certain.”
Her brows knit as she tried to understand fully the meaning of his words; his nearness did not help her in the slightest.
“Elizabeth, is anything wrong?” Mrs. Gardiner’s appearance in the doorway startled them both; she finally gathered her thoughts enough to assure her aunt that she was well and would join them in an instant. Mrs. Gardiner hesitated a moment and then returned to the salon with a last glance toward her niece. The two of them followed her, but before reaching the door, Elizabeth stopped and turned to him, finally offering her answer.
“Mr. Darcy…I thank you, sir—for your concern and for your kind invitation. I am sure we will enjoy Miss Darcy’s company very much during this visit, as well as the colonel’s and yours—that is, if you gentlemen have no other more important duties?”
Darcy’s surprise was as obvious as was his delight, and his countenance lightened in an instant; even more, a smile graced the corner of his lips. “The pleasure would be mine, Miss Bennet. Please allow me to show you in.”
Their late entrance drew three pairs of eyes toward them, but no comment was made. Elizabeth sat near Georgiana while Mrs. Gardiner and the colonel sat opposite; Darcy chose an armchair a little apart from the rest.
Tea and sweets were ordered, and as the time passed, Elizabeth felt her spirits rising again and her fears dissipating one by one until she could almost enjoy the visit. The room, as did the rest of the house she had seen, heightened Elizabeth’s admiration for the exquisite taste of the owner. Together with her aunt, she expressed her admiration and delight to Miss Darcy, but then she remembered the master’s presence and the words beautiful and charming died on her lips, fearing her praise would be misinterpreted as presumptuous.
At some point, the names of Mr. Bingley and his sister entered the conversation, and Elizabeth was told the whole family had been out of town for the last couple of months; however, they were expected to return in a fortnight. Again, she searched Miss Darcy’s face as she spoke about that gentleman, and her opinion remained the same in t
hat regard. No visible emotion affected the young lady when Mr. Bingley was discussed.
Colonel Fitzwilliam retired after less than half an hour, as he had a previous appointment, but not before asking for permission to call soon at Gracechurch Street.
After his cousin’s departure, Darcy participated even less in the conversation. Despite this, it was obvious that he encouraged any attempt at conversation between Elizabeth and his sister and approved their animated talk about music and theatre. The mention of their music room at Pemberley apparently brought new recollections to Miss Darcy as she addressed Mrs. Gardiner with a new plea.
“Mrs. Gardiner, I was wondering…If I am not asking too much, could you please tell me a few more things about my mother? I used to talk to my brother and even to my father about her, but it is so wonderful to hear the opinion of someone outside the family.”
“Gladly, Miss Darcy; I will tell you everything I remember.” For almost half an hour, Mrs. Gardiner continued to relate her memories. Several times Elizabeth turned her eyes to Mr. Darcy, and each time the picture he presented was more of a young boy fighting to look brave and conceal his sadness than of the proud, haughty, unpleasant man she had known. Moreover, the pretty face of Miss Darcy, wearing the love and longing for her mother, made Elizabeth’s heart melt with tenderness and ache in grief and remorse for her previous behaviour and complete lack of fairness in judging them.
She also remembered Mr. Wickham’s words about Miss Darcy’s pride and cold manners; how easily she had given him full credit in this. She never took the trouble before to consider that the young lady Wickham was speaking of was almost still a child and could not be so vicious in character at such a young age. Not once while listening to that gentleman’s stories did she consider how difficult it must have been for the Darcy siblings to deal with both parents passing and how intensely that loss affected not only their private deportment but their public interactions.