by Anna Stone
“Oh Emma,” Lillian said. “I’m sorry.”
“She’s been doing well for years now. Well enough to go back to a normal life, at least. But I knew that my moving out would be hard on her. And when I got that phone call yesterday, I thought the worst.” Emma closed her eyes and leaned her head against the wall beside her. “She never went to the hospital by herself back then. I always had to talk her into it. So when I heard she was in the hospital, I thought that it was because she’d hurt herself, or…” Emma trailed off.
“No wonder you were so upset yesterday,” Lillian said. “I’m so sorry that you had to go through all that.”
“It’s okay. I know that my mom is fine. But I stop wondering if this is all my fault for leaving her.”
“Emma,” Lillian said firmly. “Your mom had a car accident. It had nothing to do with you.”
“I know. I just can’t help but feel responsible for her. I know that it doesn’t make sense.”
“It does make sense. You’ve got a big heart, that’s all.”
Blue nudged Emma’s hand with his nose. She had stopped petting him. She scratched him under the chin. “How are things back there?” Emma asked.
“They’re fine,” Lillian replied, a little too quickly.
“Is something the matter?” Emma asked.
“It’s nothing you need to worry about. You should be focusing on your family right now.”
“That reminds me, I need a few days off. My aunt is coming down to help in a couple of days, but I want to stay until then. Mom isn’t able to do much right now.”
“Take all the time you need,” Lillian said.
“Thanks, Lillian. I should go. The kids will be back soon.”
“No problem. Call me again if you need to.”
“I will. Bye, Lillian.” Emma hung up the phone.
Emma lingered at the bottom of the stairs, relishing the silence. The house would be full of noise and activity soon. Hopefully the kids wouldn’t be too rowdy. She stood up and went back upstairs. Emma peered through her mom’s door. She was reclining on the bed, a well-read book in her hand.
“Is that you, Emma?” her mom asked.
“Yep.” Emma opened the door fully. “I’m just checking up on you. How are you feeling?”
“I’m fine. Want to keep me company until the kids get home?”
“Sure.” Emma entered the room and sat down on the bed.
Her mom put down the book. “How’re you holding up?”
“Me?” Emma asked. “You’re the one who just had surgery.”
“Minor surgery. And you didn’t have to come all the way down here just for this. What about your job? Won’t that boss of yours be mad?”
Emma bit back a smile. “She doesn’t mind. How are you doing?”
“You asked me that already. Why are you so worried about me?”
“I’m not, I…” Emma felt all her emotions welling up again. “When they called me and told me you were in the hospital, I thought it was because…”
“Oh, honey.” Emma’s mom sat up on the bed. “I’ve told you that you don’t have to worry about that anymore. I’m much better now.” She paused. “Is that why you were so hesitant to move out all this time? Because you thought that leaving would make me depressed again?”
“Yes,” Emma admitted.
“Emma, I’m not going to lie to you. You’re my first child. Of course it’s been hard to adjust to you being gone. But I’m managing.” She placed her hand on Emma’s. “Do you know what would make me even sadder than you leaving?”
Emma shook her head.
“Knowing that I’m holding you back.”
“You haven’t been holding me back,” Emma said.
“I have. I’ve taken so much from you. This family has. You’ve given ten of the best years of your life to us.”
“That was my choice, Mom.”
“No, it wasn’t. You were seventeen. You were just a kid. You didn’t know what you were giving up.”
“I don’t regret it,” Emma said. “It was hard, but I was never unhappy. I wouldn’t have done anything differently if I could.”
“I believe you,” her mom said. “But now it’s time for you to stop worrying about us and start worrying about you. Stop trying to please everyone else. Be selfish. Do what makes you happy. If not for yourself, then for me. Can you do that?”
“Yes,” Emma said, a tear rolling down her cheek.
Emma’s mom pulled her into a hug. “It’s okay, hon.”
“I’m still staying here for a few days. At least until Aunt Leah gets here.”
“All right. But then I want you to go back to the city and back to your life.”
Emma sniffled. “I will.”
“So, tell me about your life in the city. Are you making friends? Met any cute boys?”
Emma hesitated. She wasn’t sure how her mom would react to the fact that she was having a secret fling with her female boss. Her mom was pretty open-minded, but considering she’d had her heart set on Emma marrying Marcus, she might not take the news of her daughter’s newly discovered sexuality well. But she was tired of keeping Lillian a secret. And Emma’s mom had just told her to do what made her happy.
And Lillian made her happier than anyone else ever had.
Before Emma could say anything, she heard the front door open, then the sounds of the twins running through the hall.
“Mom!” one of them shouted.
“Quiet, Jeremy,” Margo said sternly. “Mom’s resting.”
Emma’s mom chuckled. “She’s been bossing them around like that a lot lately. Reminds me of you.”
Emma smiled and got up from the bed. “She’s right, though. You’re supposed to be resting. I’ll get out of your hair.”
“All right, honey. Don’t forget what I said.”
“Don’t worry, Mom. I won’t.”
18
Lillian
Lillian left her apartment and got into the elevator, tapping her foot impatiently. Emma was coming back today. She had only been gone for a few days, but Lillian had gotten so used to seeing Emma every day at work. Without Emma there, her warm smile lighting up the room, the monochrome office seemed even more dull, the overworked employees even more lifeless.
Of course, Lillian would have to tell Emma about the incident with Thomas. She wasn’t looking forward to that conversation. But she was looking forward to telling Emma about her plan for them to spend some time together.
Lillian didn’t know what was wrong with her. The fact that Thomas had caught on to their relationship should have been a wakeup call for her to put an end to things. Yet here she was, orchestrating ways for them to be together.
Was it time to think of a more permanent solution? Lillian could find Emma another job so they could openly date. All she’d have to do was put in a few phone calls. But that would mean admitting that this was more than a fling. That would require a level of commitment that Lillian wasn’t sure she could make.
Lillian left the lobby and headed toward the office. She had barely taken a dozen steps before she stopped in her tracks. Parked across the road was a nondescript, dark gray sedan with tinted windows. Lillian wouldn’t have noticed it if it weren’t for the fact that lately, she had been seeing that very same car everywhere. Out the front of her apartment, by the office, even at a business meeting across town. It was like that man in the blue baseball cap all over again.
Was she being paranoid? There had to be hundreds of cars that looked like that in the city. Perhaps it belonged to someone who lived in her building. Still, Lillian took note of the license plate before continuing to work.
Soon she was buried in a mountain of paperwork and forgot all about it. When 8 a.m. rolled around, there was a knock on her office door.
“Emma,” Lillian said. “Shut the door.”
Emma closed the door and approached Lillian’s desk. “What’s the matter?”
“How’s your mom?” Lillian asked.
“She’s fine,” Emma replied. “What’s going on?”
“You might want to sit down.” Lillian gestured toward the chair in front of her desk. She desperately wanted to draw Emma into her arms and pull her in close. But she didn’t.
“Lillian. What’s wrong?”
“Relax, Emma. It’s nothing to worry about,” Lillian said. The desk seemed to loom between them. “But we need to be more careful from here on out.”
“Why?” Emma asked. “Did something happen?”
“Thomas is getting suspicious. He doesn’t have any evidence that there’s anything between us. But we’ve been much too careless about this.” Lillian folded her hands in front of her. “If we get caught, I could lose my job.”
“What? When you said there were rules, I thought you just meant—I don’t know—you’d get a slap on the wrist or something,” Emma said. “You’re a partner! You can’t be fired.”
“I can be fired for this,” Lillian said. “I’m sure you’ve already heard about Gordon Sr.?”
“Yes, Bridget told me.” A look of horror crossed Emma’s face. “But this isn’t sexual harassment.”
“No, it’s not. But after Gordon resigned, Avery and I drew up a binding code of conduct to make it easier for us to oust a partner if they were involved in anything ‘inappropriate.’ That includes having a relationship with an employee. It made sense at the time.”
“I had no idea. I don’t want you to lose your job. Does this mean…”
“All it means is that we need to be careful.” It occurred to Lillian that if she had told Emma that she could lose her job over this when it all started, Emma might have backed off. They probably never would have gotten together. It would have saved them both a hell of a lot of trouble. But they were in too deep now.
“Do you think he’ll tell anyone?” Emma asked.
“I don’t know. Either way, I can’t be pushed out without Avery agreeing to it, which is unlikely. Especially not without concrete evidence. Thomas doesn’t have any. And we’re not going to give him any.”
“What does this mean for us?”
“It means we need to set some ground rules. No messages, emails, phone calls, unless they’re to do with work. Nothing that leaves a trail.” It was overkill. But with the odd things that had been occurring around her, Lillian wasn’t taking any chances. “And we have to be strictly professional at work. No more games.”
Emma nodded. “Okay.”
“I’m trying to come up with a better solution. But for now? I’m going away on a business trip next week. To San Francisco.” Lillian leaned forward to rest her forearms on the desk. “And you’re coming with me.”
Emma’s face lit up. “Really?”
“Yes. You’re experienced enough now that it’ll be useful for me to have you with me. You can take notes in my meetings and help keep me organized. It wouldn’t look unusual from the outside. And the best part? We’ll be halfway across the country, where no one knows us, for two and a half days.” Lillian smiled. “I can even take you on a real date, so bring something nice to wear.”
“I would love that,” Emma said. “I’m so happy right now that I could kiss you.”
Lillian beckoned Emma with a finger. “Come here.” So much for keeping things professional.
Emma rounded the desk. Lillian pulled Emma down into her lap and kissed her, soft and slow.
Emma wrapped her arms around Lillian’s neck and let out a long sigh. “I missed you while I was away.”
“I missed you too,” Lillian said.
“Are you sure you didn’t just miss having someone to boss around?” Emma asked.
“That too. But we both know I can do that from a distance.”
Emma blushed, no doubt recalling that late-night phone call of theirs.
“Let’s get to work.” Lillian shook Emma off her lap. “And it’s best for you to call me Ms. White when other people are around. Lillian is too familiar.”
“Only when other people are around, Ms. White?” Emma teased.
“No games,” Lillian said. But she couldn’t resist swatting the back of Emma’s thigh when she got up.
After kissing Lillian on the cheek, Emma visibly suppressed her excitement, then left Lillian’s office. Lillian smiled to herself. If Emma was happy now, she would be even happier when she saw the hotel Lillian was taking her to. And the restaurant. Lillian was paying for it all out of her own pocket since the firm couldn’t afford it any longer. It would all be worth it.
Lillian sighed. What the hell was she doing? Taking Emma on a date? Spoiling her? Promising her the world when Lillian would never be able to give it to her?
Or perhaps she could. Perhaps this time, it would be different.
19
Emma
It was midmorning when Emma and Lillian arrived in San Francisco. To Emma’s dismay, the flight was too short for her to really take advantage of traveling business class. Soon they were on their way to the first meeting of the day.
Emma watched the city go by out the window. “You need to take me with you on business trips more often.”
“Just wait until you see the hotel,” Lillian said. “I booked two rooms. But I have no intention of letting you stay in yours.”
Emma smiled. “It’ll be nice to not have to sneak around for once.”
“Agreed. And we’re going out to dinner tonight. Did you bring something nice to wear like I told you?”
Emma nodded. That black dress that she had bought on her shopping trip with Bridget was inside her suitcase on its way to the hotel.
“Good. Although it’s unlikely that we’ll run into anyone we know, we still have to be careful.”
“So, no making out in the middle of the restaurant?” Emma asked.
“Unfortunately, no.” Lillian leaned over and whispered into her ear. “But we have the whole night for that.”
Heat rose under Emma’s skin. That was the part of the trip she was looking forward to the most.
Lillian sat back. “Until then, it’s all business. We have a packed schedule today.”
Emma listened as Lillian outlined their plans, most of which were meetings. Emma was looking forward to seeing Lillian in action. The cases Lillian dealt with were almost always resolved outside the courtroom. But from what she’d overheard of Lillian’s phone conversations, Emma knew that Lillian was just as commanding and relentless when it came to defending her clients outside the courtroom. And Emma found it sexy as hell.
The morning crawled by. To Emma’s dismay, most of the meetings were dull and tedious, but taking notes kept her busy. Listening to Lillian discuss the details of bank regulation with a bunch of generic-looking, middle-aged men in suits almost put her to sleep.
Late in the afternoon, they came to the last meeting of the day. Lillian flicked through her notes in the car on the way there. Emma had typed up those notes herself, so she still remembered what they contained.
The case in question involved a rapidly growing tech startup that was attempting to enforce a noncompete agreement on a former employee of theirs. Lillian was representing the former employee, a young woman named Kate Waters. Kate had quit her Silicon Valley job and moved to Chicago to start her own IT security company. She had hired Lillian to look after her small company’s legal needs. So, when this issue arose, Kate called on Lillian to represent her.
They arrived at their destination, a large law office that was almost identical to AG&W. It was on the top floor, and it had the exact same monochrome, modern design. There was even a pretty young receptionist with the same perfect smile as Bridget. As they entered the lobby, a young woman with short, dark hair waved nervously at Lillian from her seat in the corner.
“Kate,” Lillian said, shaking her hand. “This is Emma, my legal assistant.”
Kate shook Emma’s hand, “Nice to meet you.”
“How are you feeling about all of this?” Lillian asked.
“Good. I think.” Kate gave Lillian a tight
smile.
“Any second thoughts about settling? I’ve said it before, you have a strong case if you want to take the time to fight it.”
“No. I this has gone on long enough. I just want it to be over.”
“All right,” Lillian said. “This will be resolved by the end of the day, Kate. And they’re not going to take your company from you. I won’t let that happen.”
Kate smiled, much more convincingly this time. “Okay.”
It was strange to see Lillian like this with a client. Reassuring and gentle while still confident and firm. Lillian’s other clients wanted a cutthroat lawyer who could browbeat the opposition into submission. But Kate didn’t need that. She was an anxious young woman whose entire company was at stake. This was the Lillian that Kate needed. The Lillian that Emma had slowly come to know.
As Emma listened to Lillian go over the case with Kate, she heard a passion and conviction in Lillian’s voice that she rarely heard. Lillian seemed to care about this case more than most of the cases she worked on. The only other time she had seen Lillian like this was when she was working on that class-action suit.
After a few minutes, a woman came out and led them to a meeting room, where five men sat on one side of the table.
“If it isn’t Lillian White,” one of the men said with a smile. “It’s been a while.”
“Robert.” Lillian shook his hand firmly, her face an expressionless mask.
Emma knew the man from Lillian’s notes. Although Robert was older, his career mirrored Lillian’s, and they had something of a rivalry. They had been on opposing sides of cases for years until Robert had moved to San Francisco.