by Sara Cate
I know I said I wasn’t going to be an observer, but I find myself standing to the side, because watching him, the way he controls her and the way she submits to him is way more intoxicating than I expected. With a few simple commands, he has her naked on the bed, facing the headboard, kneeling as he grabs the rope. Unbinding it, he hands one strand to me.
“You said you didn’t want to watch.”
I nod, taking the nylon and moving to the opposite headboard.
“Lilac, you’ll be a good girl for Nash, won’t you?”
“Yes, sir,” she purrs, and my dick twitches.
He walks me through binding her wrist to the bedpost, and I do my best to hide the shake in my hands. What the fuck is wrong with me? Of course, Ellis catches it. He catches everything, and as he glances up from my hands, he gives me a coy smirk, and I shoot him a grimace Lilac doesn’t see.
Soon, she doesn’t see anything because he uses the black silk to blindfold her. Just the sight of her, naked and bound at our mercy is so fucking dirty and somehow goddamn beautiful. I can’t take my eyes away.
Ellis looks at the other items still on the bed, browsing through them like he’s shopping for a new suit. Finally, his hand lands on the paddle, and he picks it up, swinging it side to side like he’s warming up. His hand reaches out and strokes Lilac down her spine gently.
“We’re going to start with twelve. If you need a break, you know what to say.”
“Yes, sir,” she whispers, a quiver to her voice.
“What does she say?” I ask, and I almost feel bad breaking the scene a little, but Ellis only looks up at me with a delicate smile on his face.
“Lilac’s safe word is trust.”
Safe word. Of course, there’s a safe word, but something about him saying that sends a lightning bolt of excitement up my spine. This is really fucking happening.
“Count for me, Lilac.”
“Yes, sir,” she says, and I watch as she lets out a big exhale, her shoulders relaxing almost as if she doesn’t want to tense up as he takes his first swing. The immediate smack of the paddle against the bare skin of her ass makes me flinch, and my eyes dash over to him. Lilac lets out on a small gasp, and I watch her pale skin turn pink almost immediately.
“One,” she says with more composure and calmness than I’d expect. I mean, yeah, I get she signed up for this and literally asked for it, but fuck, that sounded like it hurt.
When he swings a second time, it’s lighter, but the smack still echoes through the room.
“Two,” she says with no real change to her voice.
By five, her counting sounds strangled, and her cries are louder, almost like she can’t take it anymore. There’s a part of me that wants her to use the safe word, tell him to stop. She’s clearly in pain and I can hear that it hurts like a bitch, but she doesn’t. Instead, she hangs from the bed posts and counts like he told her to.
It’s around nine when I realize my eyes are no longer on Lilac. They’re on him. With each swing, some soft and some hard, his determination captures me. Every single movement is intentional, controlled, and complicit. We both pulled off our shirts when we first came in the room, and my eyes get caught for a moment on the veins of his forearm with every swing and smack of the paddle. There’s a heaving to his chest, and an evil-looking delight in his eyes as he inflicts the pain.
I’m so caught up in what I’m seeing I hardly notice my dick is trying to bust out of these pants like it’s fucking Shawshank Redemption down there.
It’s not like I’m naive to this shit. I used a belt on Zara for fuck’s sake, but this is different. It’s so intentional, and watching him has my body reacting in ways I did not see coming.
When I hear her say “twelve” in a strangled sob, I realize Ellis is looking at me, or rather, he catches me looking at him. Then his gaze travels down to my crotch to see the very obvious erection in my pants. When our eyes meet again, it’s charged, a special glint in his eye.
“It’s your turn,” he announces as he strokes Lilac’s hair, his hand traveling all the way down to her bare ass which is now painted red. She’s breathing heavy, her posture sagging, but she doesn’t protest or say her safe word. “Lilac wants another round, don’t you, my little flower?”
“Yes, sir,” she whispers. He climbs up next to her, kissing her on the mouth, and I see her reaction in every little movement of her body. The way it tilts toward him like a magnet, so eager and desperate for his attention, and I get a twinge of something like jealousy in my stomach.
He climbs down and hands the paddle to me. “She’s ready for you.”
I don’t even know this girl. Sure, I’ve fucked plenty of girls I didn’t know, maybe even spanked a few, but this is different. Still, I take the paddle and look at Lilac. Mostly, I feel his eyes on me, his arms crossed over his bare chest, and I want to do this right.
Squeezing the leather wrapped handle, I take my first swing, back-handed and holding back, but not too much. Lilac lets out a beautiful cry as my spine erupts with some sensation I’ve never felt before. It skitters across the skin of my arms as I paddle her again. I’m only aware of two things while I take her from panting to all-out gasping for breath. One, Ellis is watching me. His eyes haven’t left me since he gave me the paddle, and I feel it. I feel his gaze on me, the way he’s watching, and how bad I want to please him. And how something about his posture and expression changes as I land the paddle on her upper thighs and bright red ass.
The other thing I’m aware of is I fucking love this.
All too soon, the twelve smacks are up. When it was Ellis’s turn at bat, I almost wanted him to stop, afraid he would really hurt her, but when it was my turn, I didn’t want it to end. The more she cried, the more excited I got. I mean, I don’t really want to hurt the girl; it’s not about that. It’s about giving her the punishment she wants.
I’m almost disappointed when he begins to untie her wrists, but he’s not done with her yet. As Lilac relaxes from the binding against the bedposts, there are tears streaming down her face, but she still doesn’t fight or argue. Not even when he fists her hair and practically drags her over to me.
She’s on the bed in front of me on all fours when he says, “He’s already so hard and ready for you, Lilac. Take out his dick and suck on it.”
“Yes, sir,” she says with a residual shake in her voice.
My lips part and I watch as she does what he tells her, and when her soft lips wrap around my cock, I let out a groan.
Then, I make a big mistake. I look up. With her on my cock, pleasure painted across my face and in my eyes, I stare at him. And he stares back.
We look at each other too long. Too fucking long. The only time he breaks the eye contact is when he goes to the drawer to get two condoms, removing his pants and slipping one on. Even when he slips into her from behind, he’s looking at me.
And yeah, it’s with my eyes on his face, those sharp cheekbones and abyss-like dark brown eyes, when I feel my balls tightening, ready to come.
“Lilac, stop,” he barks, and just like that she pulls her mouth off of me, leaving my body on edge, not quite over the precipice, but dangling there. “You’re such a good girl, but we don’t want him coming yet.” She bites her lip, no longer crying but now wearing a mischievous smile. Then her hands reach out and wrap around my balls, pulling down and forcing a moan from my lips.
I’m still panting when she releases me and he yanks her up, flush to his body. With his mouth next to her ear, he whispers in a husky voice, “How did his cock taste?”
And I swear if he didn’t want me to come, that was not the thing to say because my now my body is confused as fuck.
“It tasted good, sir,” she replies. “Do you want me to bring him over here so you can try it?”
I get tunnel vision, but I try to hide how fucked out of my brain I am right now, and it’s not because I’m scared of him sucking my dick. It’s how scared I am by how much I want him to. The thought of his
lips—
“I don’t think Nash is ready for that,” he replies, smiling at me as he kisses her cheek. Suddenly, I’m the odd man out again, and it makes me irritable and defensive. I don’t like when people speak for me or dismiss what I do or do not want. That’s the only reason I blurt out, “I’m ready for whatever you got. You want a taste, then come get a fucking taste.”
His fire-hot stare blazes into me as he taps her hips and barks, “On the floor, Lilac.” She crawls away from him, climbing down to the floor to kneel at my feet. Then, I watch him as he walks around the bed, meeting me toe-to-toe. Did I say too much? Maybe Ellis isn’t into sucking dick and I just fucking insulted him? Although that’s not what my gut is telling me here. My gut is telling me I just invited Ellis Prior to suck my cock and that is exactly what he’s about to do.
Without a word, he kneels on the floor next to Lilac, both of them staring up as he takes her by the hair again and presses her toward me. She swallows my length without hesitation.
After a few strokes, he pulls her off and puts his own mouth in her place with his soft lips and bright red tongue waiting at the edge of his mouth. It’s all I can focus on as it engulfs my body in warmth. A low, growling hum vibrates out of my chest as he takes me deep, deeper than she did, all the while keeping his eyes on me. Nothing about my body or brain wants to reject this, and I can chalk that up to us being freaky as fuck.
How can I refuse the fact that Ellis gives some legendary fucking head? I’m too busy focusing on that and not on the fact that a guy has my dick down his throat.
“I’m going to—” I say in a warning, my voice strangled and tight as I pull away, Ellis popping off, and I immediately wish I could have finished in his mouth.
“You were right, Lilac. It does taste good. Now get back on that bed.”
“Yes, sir,” she replies and does what he tells her to do. I’m too busy trying to get my head on right as Ellis stands and gives me a quick are you okay glance with his eyes at which I nod. Yes, of course I’m fine, too fucking fine. So, fucking fine, it’s scary.
A good hour later, the three of us collapse onto the bed with nothing left, completely spent. Lilac is lying on her stomach next to me, and finally, it feels like she’s out of character, free to just be herself. No more sir and submission shit.
“I like you,” she says sweetly. “He’s good,” she says to Ellis as he stands up and strokes her backside tenderly.
“I know he is,” he says, and it catches my attention. He knows I’m good? I’ll assume he means at sex, but it feels like there’s more there.
Just as he moves toward the bedroom door, she calls out for him. “Where are you going?”
“To get you some water and something to eat. You know the drill.”
She rolls her eyes and looks at me. “He likes to do things right. This is the part where he’s supposed to coddle me and pamper me, but I don’t need that. I mean, don’t get me wrong, sometimes I do, but tonight, you pampered me plenty. I don’t think I’ve ever come that many times in a row. Not in a long time at least.”
She’s so talkative now, almost like she’s a different person than the tense girl who I met on the couch.
“How often do you guys do this?” I ask.
“Me and Ellis? I don’t know…every couple of months or so. It’s just an outlet, no big commitment to it, know what I mean?”
“Sure,” I reply even though I don’t.
“Did you like it?” she asks, a bright smile on her face for a girl who probably won’t be able to sit without wincing for a week.
“Fuck yeah.”
“Did you like him sucking your cock?” she asks quietly. “I could tell that was your first time.”
My eyes go wide. “Uh…I mean, yeah. Of course, I liked it.”
“Ellis is amazing, and he likes you. I can tell.”
There’s a quickening in my chest, and I try to shove it down. Of course, Ellis likes me. We’re friends. Practically best friends at this point. We almost live together. We share girls regularly. I’ve told him everything. So yeah, of course he likes me.
When he comes back in, he tries to force feed Lilac some cheese, fruit, and bread which she obliges and does it to please him. The water takes less coaxing.
“Are you staying tonight?” he asks.
“Nah, I have to work tomorrow. Thanks for a good evening though. I needed that.” Suddenly, she’s jumping off the bed, dressing casually like she came over for pizza and a movie, and we didn’t just fuck her brains out.
“You boys have fun though,” she adds with a wink, and my cheeks flush hot.
“Let me walk you out,” he says, moving for his pants.
“No,” she barks at him before running up to kiss him on the cheek. “You two are too gorgeous lying together naked and I want to take this vision with me. I’ll be thinking about it later.” Then with a wink, she waves goodbye and rushes out the door.
For a long quiet moment, it’s just me and Ellis…naked together. There’s no girl here, and with everything we’ve done, I really shouldn’t be self-conscious about it, but I am.
“You should sleep in here tonight,” he says finally, getting out of bed to pick up the discarded clothes on the floor and tossing them into the hamper. “You earned it,” he adds with a chuckle.
“Okay.” It seems like the most natural thing to say. It’s not weird to sleep next to your best friend. It’s not weird that I want to sleep in here.
“I’m going to go shower real quick. You can go after me. Eat something.”
“Okay,” I reply again because I apparently can’t think a thought on my own anymore.
When he leaves the bedroom, I lie naked on his bed, my mind spinning. After a few minutes of running through the options, I settle on a couple of excuses as to why my brain can only seem to think about Ellis and his cock.
It’s just curiosity. I’ve never had sex with a man before, and after experiencing what his mouth felt like around my dick, it’s not wrong to want more.
After everything we’ve done together this year, it’s normal that my mind has connected Ellis to sex. So naturally the thought of his naked body turns me on now. What did I expect to happen?
As I get off the bed and move toward the bathroom to pee, I walk into the foggy haze and see his naked form on the other side of the frosted glass and realize this is about more than sex, isn’t it? I want to be Ellis’s first thought, his number one, his go-to. That’s what I’ve wanted this entire time, but being his best friend doesn’t seem to define what this is anymore.
“You okay?” he asks, probably noticing me standing there, staring at the mirror.
“Yeah. Just tired.”
The shower door opens. “Come on. It’s a big shower. I’m almost done. Wash up and then you can get some sleep.”
Shower with him. Am I going to pass that up? No. Just like I didn’t pass up the invitation to sleep with him. I’m out of my mind.
He was right. It is a big shower, but only by European standards, and our bodies aren’t all that far apart. I can’t take my eyes off of him as he tilts his head back, letting the water run the soap out of his hair and down his back.
“That was your first time having a man give you a blow job, wasn’t it?”
I glare up at him. “Yeah, of course.”
“I could tell by the look on your face.”
“I’m not gay.”
“Neither am I,” he replies, switching places with me so I’m directly under the spray.
“But…”
“I’m bisexual, Nash. I’ve been with men. Does that bother you?”
“No,” I answer quickly. I’m almost offended he has to ask me that, but I guess I can understand with how wigged out I am tonight. It was a lot to take in at once. The bondage, the blow job. I need a drink and a minute to process this.
“Good,” he replies, pouring shampoo into his hands, and I don’t quite know what’s happening until his hands are in my hair. He’s washing
my hair, and I’m letting him, like I’m a fucking child. But it feels good. His nearness, his attention. I’m soaking it in.
That’s the last we talk about the blow job, and I do climb into his bed after the shower. It doesn’t feel weird. Luckily, it’s a king with plenty of room for both of us, and once we both sink into the mattress, I hear his breathing slow to a sleeping cadence after only a few minutes.
Through the darkness, I can see his chest move and the silhouette of his face in the moonlight. I could never see a future without a woman in it, but these past six months have changed something in my head. Like I’m drowning in him, and I never want to come up for air.
15
As the helicopter touches down on the landing pad just outside Wilde headquarters, I let out a heavy exhale. It feels good to be off the island. Just to clear my head, ground myself in reality for a moment. Unfortunately, I couldn’t escape my company on this little trip. Ellis is sitting next to me, and Hanna is stewing silently in the back.
She asked to hitch a ride so she could handle some things, and Ellis offered to help her. He wanted to come to the meeting I have with the design team, but I assured him it’s just boring engineering stuff. Nothing to do with the acquisition, and he accepted that, deciding to accompany her instead.
The car takes them away while I head into the building to hopefully handle the issues we’re having with the dash design on the new model. I was content to leave it the way it was, but once Alistair Wilde made his little comment about the layout, I knew I would have to change it.
So that’s what we spend the next three hours doing. I end up skipping lunch trying to figure out how we can make room for the redesigned altimeter without rewiring the entire electrical panel. I hate the way it turns out, but at least he can’t say anything about it now.
After signing off on the blueprints, I grab another company car and head toward the city center.
I don’t really know what it is Hanna had to do in the city, and it’s not my business to ask. Neither of them are really talking to me after our little fight on Saturday, and it’s been two days. It’s not exactly the cold shoulder. More like they’re fine talking to each other, so they don’t need to talk to me.