by S. N. Garza
I remember when Gabriel said that to me. And I don’t think that’s entirely true. I don’t think love makes a man weak. Having love should make him feel like a king. The rest of the way, I’m silent. Thinking about Gabriel. Marcus. My mother. And what about my father?
I lift my head to see a winding, two-way road, mostly in darkness, with climbing high hills and edges that look just a bit daunting. More road surrounded by arborvitae trees providing privacy beyond. When he turns into a driveway, there’s a monstrous gate blocking the way and once he punches in a code, he’s driving past a beautiful garden and a water fountain that’s kind of remarkable. A Greek marble statue of a naked person on their stomach lay surrounded by a bath of water. Fountains with shimmery lights make it look ethereal and beautiful.
He makes his way around the turnabout driveway and says, “I’ll open your door, Willow. Stay.”
He’s so much like Gabriel. Or maybe vice-versa. I follow him inside and see the beautiful sculptures and paintings. These paintings have a dark theme to them, but they’re also filled with great emotion and pain. They feel familiar.
“Did my mother paint these?”
He stops yards in front of me and says, “Yes. She created many for me and the ones I didn’t want—which if I’m honest, I’d have kept them all if she’d have let me, I wanted to buy them all—but she was always so stubborn. So, I commissioned the rest and sold them for her. I made sure she wanted for nothing.”
“Wasn’t that my father’s job?”
Marcus stiffened, grew tense in the shoulders and refused to say anything else.
“Marcus, did you hate my mother for leaving?”
“A part of me wanted to.” He turns to me, so forlorn and sad. “But I was able to be around her.”
“What do you mean?”
“I never stopped seeing her.”
I know he sees the confusion in my face, and he sighs, beckons me to continue following. And I see painting after painting. Beautiful works of art I just know are my mother’s work. His home is like an English estate. Magnificent and grand. We get into his study and he closes the door behind him.
“There once was a time Annabelle and I were inseparable.”
“Annabelle? My mother’s name is Susan.” I show him the ring and he gives me this all-knowing smirk. He raises up his hand and its identical to mine.
“Annabelle Susan George. We were born minutes apart actually. A few minutes older than me and she never let me forget it. I gave her that as a promise ring when we were seventeen and we—well, when we were seventeen.”
“You what?”
“When I said we shared everything, I meant… everything.”
At first, I didn’t understand. And he’s looking everywhere but at me and it comes to me. Shared… everything. Oooh, that’s uh… awkward.
“Yeah, that’s nice.”
He laughs, walks to me and takes my hand, rubs his thumb over the ring and puts his hand next to mine, and I see the similarities in each ring except his is more masculine.
“Yes, it was.”
The smile on his face was tender and wistful. There’s a boyish light in his gaze when he thinks about her and while that makes me happy, it also sets a fire in my veins that he didn’t give that tenderness, that love to his own wife and son. But before I can open my mouth and say anything, he continues.
“She had an incredible gift. One I know she passed down to you, yet you stopped once you got with the boy.”
“I’m sorry, what? How?”
“I told you, Willow. I watched out over you even though I wasn’t there every day. When you got with him, your priorities shifted.”
The fact that the statement was true, makes me feel naive and even a little dumb, but I don’t regret it. “I don’t regret getting with him, Marcus. Peter was a great guy.”
“Until that summer he went off and came back and expected you to put out.” There’s a bit of rough anger in his tone that surprises me and also the fact he knows anything about my relationship with Peter in the first place makes me feel uncomfortable.
“That’s kind of creepy, you know?”
“I told you—
“Yes, you watched out for me. But my Uncle Luke did a really good job at raising me, Marcus. He’s the best dad a girl can have.”
He snickers, irritation clouding his face. “You have no idea. God, Willow, you’re such a smart girl, yet still so naive.”
“Naive in some ways, but the fact remains I wouldn’t change having grown up the way I did. And we’re not debating this. Uncle Luke has been amazing, in every way possible. So, I’d stop while you’re ahead in that regard.”
“Yeah, let’s move on, shall we? Luke Mason is the least of my concerns. And neither is that little shit, Peter Lancôme.”
“What about my mother? Why did she leave here? Are her parents still here? Are they alive? Why haven’t I met them? Where are they? Why didn’t Uncle Luke tell me?”
“Your mother is the love of my life. I always believed, as she did—at least in one point in time—that we were soulmates. She met your father when she was seventeen. She had painted for the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo and won that year. The canvas out in the main room above the stairs is that painting. She’s brilliant. No, she didn’t know her father. He left when she was just a baby, and her mother died when Annabelle was ten. They had always lived with Annabelle’s grandfather, Everett George. He… is still alive. He knows about you, but when Annabelle left with Jack Mason, he disowned her. Luke Mason never told you because I told him not to.”
Shock and a shot of rage rushes through me. “How dare you make that decision for me? For Uncle Luke?”
“Willow, you don’t understand. In your mother’s will, it stated you be allowed to live in Brisbon and be raised by your Uncle Luke. And I promise you, he didn’t want the responsibility of raising a little girl. He had his life. You would have known your great-grandfather, been around him and learned that your legacy goes very far back in Grifton Falls. I could have taken you back here, raised you as my own, as I initially wanted. You and Gabriel would have grown up siblings—but your mother, God love her, made me promise when you were born, if anything happened to them, you’d be raised in Brisbon. She also made me promise that you’re given every opportunity available to you.”
“That opportunity being Grifton Falls University?”
“Yes. And I don’t feel shame or regret. I knew I was bringing gold to GFU. I never expected Gabriel to fall for you. At first, I didn’t want him anywhere near you. I didn’t want him getting his hopes up, putting you on a pedestal, only to have you leave Grifton Falls to find bigger and better things.”
“I don’t plan on leaving Grifton Falls. For one, I have a scholarship—wait a minute. How did I get the scholarships? If my great-grandfather lives here, doesn’t that make me a legacy?”
“You are a legacy and—and you got those scholarships because you earned them. You’re wonderfully smart and you're incredibly talented.”
I turn away, letting everything sink in. I have family. Uncle Luke knew and never told me. I think back to before graduation when I received my acceptance letter from GFU and the double scholarships I received. I remember Gabriel telling me two scholarships were unheard of. That’s when it hits me.
I turn to Marcus, who’s leaning against his desk, eyebrows raised.
“I didn’t really get those scholarships, did I?”
Twenty-three
Willow
When he stays silent, I get my answer. “How could? How is it even possible? Is he paying? Who’s paying for my tuition? That’s sixty grand a year! Oh, God. I don’t feel so good.”
Oh, sweet baby Jesus. I feel faint.
“Fuck!” I hear him in the background and then I’m being lifted and set down in a chair. “Breathe, Willow. It’s okay.”
“Everything’s not okay! Who’s paying for my college?”
“I am.”
That takes me back and
I’m dumbfounded. In complete and utter shock. “Impossible. That’s… don’t you pay for Gabriel’s?”
“A portion. After he came to work for the company, he demanded he pay for half of it. Especially after he got that house of his. He never needed me.” There’s a small bitterness there that I don’t understand. If he wanted Gabriel to need him, why didn’t he act like a better father to him? Of course, Gabriel isn’t going to ask him for anything after he’s done nothing but be indifferent to him all his life, but still… a part of me wants them to connect.
“Marcus, he needs you. You’re his father. No matter what you or he says, that’s never going to change. And I have a student card, issued by the school that gets reloaded every month, how—
“Also, me. You’re given an allowance.” He says this without even batting an eyelash.
I’ll give him credit; he doesn’t even look contrite or disturbed by the fact he’s paying for everything. “Marcus, you have to stop. I’m not even earning my scholarship. Either one. How am I even here?”
“I told you. I promised your mother I’d make sure you had every opportunity. You weren’t really applying to many colleges outside of Houston. And yeah, I’ll admit, I’m selfish enough that I wanted you close for a change. I couldn’t be there for you like I wanted to be all these years. I wanted you here. You meeting Gabriel is… I couldn’t believe he went after you. Not surprising but… I don’t want him hurt either. When your mother left… she never told me why. Never said a word. Just packed up and left like I meant nothing to her.”
“Then how did you get in touch with her?”
“Six months after she left, she came back, Jack Mason in tow. I spotted them outside of a gas station and confronted her. She had been crying. Everett disowned her, told her if she left, she’s never to come back. God knows why when she’s his only family. He’s never said a word either. Simply refused to speak of her.”
“Can you take me to see him?”
“Babygirl, I—
“I’ll find it on my own if you don’t.”
He runs his hand through unruly salt and pepper hair, giving me this dark look. “God, you’re so—so much like her, yet you’re two worlds apart. I loved her more than anything. We did everything together. Shared everything. I never thought she’d leave me. We had our whole future mapped out. When she left, she left a bigger hole than I could have ever imagined. I told Everett you existed, but he didn’t really want anything to do with you. But when I told him you were here; he’s been easing into it. I didn’t want to spring you on him.”
“He knows about me. Call him.”
“Willow—
“Do it now.”
I know I sound bitchy, but I want to meet him. I want to know why he disowned my mother for leaving. That’s so messed up. What did she ever do to deserve that? Marcus glares at me, not liking to be told what to do. Oh well. I’ll just find it on my own if he doesn’t. He’s got to live somewhere around here.
Shaking his head, he pulls out his phone and does whatever he does before pressing it to his ear.
“Everett, Marcus. Are you available? Well, there’s someone who wants to meet you. Yeah. She hates being called Annie. I know she is. Willow looks a lot like him, except for the eyes. Yeah. Okay. We’ll be there shortly. Right.” He hangs up and pockets his phone. “Alright. Let’s go.”
He starts walking towards me and when he gets next to me, I grab his arm, causing him to turn. This overwhelming emotion comes over me and I shove my arms around his waist and hug him tight. “Thank you.”
He doesn’t return my embrace. At first. When I’m pulling away, he wraps his arms around my back and pulls me in. “You were everything to your mom, Willow. And she was my everything, so you naturally became that for me too. I loved your mother. I know it’s hard to accept when I have a family of my own. I was a shit father to Gabriel, but he turned out good. He got you, didn’t he? Never thought he’d get serious about anyone. And what happened? He gets serious with you. Don’t hurt my son, Willow. Grifton Falls is a small place to get stuck in.”
“Is that what she was, Marcus? Stuck?”
“I don’t know, babygirl. I just know she left a king-size hole in my chest that hasn’t been filled. And I miss her, more than I can bear sometimes. And I know you think with a wife and child of my own, that’s cruel, but it’s how I feel. You’re here now and my son has fallen head over heels in love with you. You’re only eighteen. How do you know what you want?”
He’s right about one part. I am young. I don’t know what I’ll want in four years, five, ten… No one can know because everything changes. What I do know, is that I love Gabriel more I could ever have hoped for and I don’t believe this is just a college romance. I want to be with him. For however long we get the time together.
I let him go and step away, and yeah, I feel tears burn in my eyes, but I know I won’t be moved in my regard for Gabriel. And even though I kind of had a rough start here, I love Grifton Falls. It’s such beautiful country out here. The hills and woods. And even though it’s a college town where there are tons of things to do, it’s still a quiet, small town where everyone knows almost everyone. I love it here. It reminds me of Brisbon, which is a football town. The whole town would go to the Friday night football game and then bonfires afterward to celebrate a win or to get over a loss. The social on Saturdays. Here in Grifton Falls, it’s all about rugby and football. The school has such an excellent athletic program. It’s a top ten university. Top five academically. And here I am. But it’s all because of him. Not of my own doing.
“Marcus, I love him. And what if he ends up leaving me?”
“He won’t. I never stopped loving your mother, Willow. I see how he looks at you. The longing. The need. I don’t want him to go through what I did.”
“He won’t.”
“Can you promise me that?”
Can I? I don’t want anyone but Gabriel. What I feel for him runs deeper than the earth. “Yes. I promise. And yes, I’m eighteen. I might make mistakes, but so has he. He’s made a few already, but I’ve forgiven him. He’s learning, too. How do you know he won’t hurt me? He’s only twenty-three.”
“He knows. Alright. Come on, then. It’s getting late, and Everett George is usually always on a time schedule.” He cups my shoulders and leans in and presses a fatherly kiss to my forehead.
I follow him back out when a woman walks in through the door. When she sees Marcus, I see her eyes light up but the moment they saw me, they died. Just like that, blankness.
“Marcus.”
“Laurel, this is—
“I know who she is. She looks so much like Susan.” Then she walks past Marcus who reaches out and takes her bicep, jerking her close and I look down, this shameful sensation running through my veins.
“Never look at her like that. Do you understand me? You have no reason to be jealous, Laurel.”
“Get your hand off me, Marcus. It’s not like you ever wanted—never mind. It doesn’t matter. I only came home to pack. I think it’s time I finally moved on.”
Oh, my God. I should not be hearing this.
But it’s Marcus’s reaction that stuns both of us, I think. He jerks back as if he’s been burned. His face pales just the slightest, and I know… somewhere, deep down, he feels more than he’s saying. Even when he says he loves my mother… something holds him back. I don’t’ know how I know. Maybe because Gabriel never gave up. He came after me. I don’t think Marcus would have let my mother leave if he didn’t want her to. He wouldn’t have just… moved on.
Which he did. He’s with Gabriel’s mom. Never left her.
I see his jaw tighten along with his hand on her bicep. “Move on? From what? Me?”
From the way she looked at him when she came in, there’s still emotion there. She still wants him. But then she saw me, and it was like she just shut down.
“I think so. It’s not like there’s any love lost between us, right?”
“You’d l
eave me? Just like that? After twenty-three years of doing whatever the hell you want?”
That blankness is suddenly gone with a fit of rage. She snatches her arm out of his grip and I can’t help but look up and see her eyes glistening, but she’s able to hold it in. “Doing whatever the hell I want? Ha. Anything was better than being in the shadow of a woman who’s not even here. Being second in everything. Maybe it’s time I—
Then what happens next both shocks the hell out of her and me as his hand quickly reaches around the back of her neck, his fingers go into her hair and with a little pull, her head tilts back. “I don’t think so, Laurel.”
She gasps, and I see her eyes dilate. Oh, yeah. I so need to get out of here. Thankfully, Marcus says just that. “Willow, meet me out in my car. This won’t take long.”
“Don’t do anything stupid, Marcus,” I say just in case he even thinks about raising a hand to her. I don’t think he would, but there’s a volatile look in both of their eyes that make me question whether I should really leave them alone.
“Willow, go.”
I look to see if Laurel Saint is okay, but her eyes are trained on Marcus. I slink away and wait for him by his car. That was pretty intense. Whatever the hell is going on between them, it’s not over. He looked possessive as hell. The moment she said she was thinking about leaving? That had been a mistake. He can say he loves my mother all he wants, but the look he gave her, is the same look Gabriel gives me. Constantly. Maybe what they need to do, is just get out of Grifton Falls, together and go someplace they can be alone. Makes me wonder what Gabriel would think. He seems to think they hate each other. No way would Marcus look at her like that if there wasn’t some emotion. Maybe he thinks it’s just his possessive nature that’s guiding him, but I don’t think he’d act so volatile towards her when she said she plans on leaving him. I wrap Gabriel’s letterman tighter around me and when I finally see Marcus slamming the door behind him, he cracks his neck and there’s this dark, brooding look in his gaze which has me standing straighter.