“Can’t go all this way and lose the sonofabitch that’s got my back”
Kerry gave him a wry smile. They’d traveled far. The final destination was now feet away. He checked his gun.
WASHINGTON, DC – THE WHITE HOUSE
Sarah Sanders listened to the NBC reporter’s question and casually let her pinkie finger brush against the trap door button. She felt an electric thrill slide up her spine and nodded “no” to yet another question. One day she would press it, and make their nightmares come to life.
CHAPPAQUA, NEW YORK
Hillary and Michelle hugged. Theirs was a bond now forged in fire. They had watched each other’s backs, fought – and even killed for a great cause. They were forever connected.
“Oprah.”
“Oprah.”
Hillary walked towards her home as Michelle pulled off in her muscle car.
SOMEWHERE
The head of the cartel looked away. He had seen unmentionable brutality, but this was… beyond.
Ivanka screamed in primal rage as she let him have it.
Jared began to tell them everything.
“I knew you’d break,” she whispered as she spat onto the ground next to his bare feet.
CALIFORNIA – ARBY’S
Comey sighed, assessing the entire sordid saga Tiffany had laid out for him. He had kept notes as she spoke. Three single-spaced handwritten pages. The crimes were local, state, federal, international.
“Your brother is in trouble.”
“Don’t call him that. He’s just a boy I know.”
WASHINGTON, DC – RUBIO RESIDENCE
Rubio found himself staring at Kellyanne’s bicep.
He nervously laughed.
He could hear Romney in his head, coaching him through.
He wasn’t sure if he could go through with it. His stomach churned.
“More wine?”
“Get to the point, Marco. I’m a busy woman. I work for the president.”
“You have toyed with magicks beyond your comprehension,” McConnell hissed as his spirit form appeared across from Ryan’s on the ethereal plane.
“Boy howdy,” he replied, “I just wanted some darn tax cuts.”
“Foolish mortal.”
“Quite a pickle, Mitch.”
SOMEWHERE IN THE ARCTIC CIRCLE
Biden arched his back but was only able to separate a few inches from Kerry, whose back was tied to his.
“It’s like Rangoon all over again,” Biden yelled, blood on his gleaming white teeth.
He felt a vibration as Kerry chuckled. The black eye hadn’t killed his sense of humor.
MANHATTAN, NY – TRUMP TOWER
The toy had been designed to entertain cats. The end of it was a tail that flicked to-and-fro. Eric could not figure it out, and for the last two hours it had completely consumed his attention.
Cheney emerged from the shack, his fists encased in solid gold gloves. He looked at Biden and Kerry, unbowed, tied to each other.
He opened one end of his mouth and a cackle emerged, the sound of metal clanging from Cheney’s body accompanying it.
“You both think you’re so smart.”
RUSSIA – THE KREMLIN
Yuri walked in the direction of the throne room, taking his time.
He was in no rush.
Inside, Putin sat in the middle of his tantrum’s aftermath.
Paintings ripped. Furniture cut up.
He was beyond livid.
Yuri’s slick hand slipped off the door handle, delaying the inevitable.
CHAPPAQUA, NEW YORK/SOMEWHERE ELSE
Hillary opened the door.
Bill wasn’t there. It was unusual for him to be gone like this.
Obama looked at Bill.
Both men gripped their guns and looked down.
Sparks spewed from Cheney’s golden manacles.
WASHINGTON, DC – THE KUSHNER/TRUMP RESIDENCE
Ivanka seethed with rage. She had foolishly believed she had excised all feelings, but Jared’s betrayal had brought them back to life.
Daddy was vulnerable.
Oprah and Putin circled like vultures.
“I can play too,” she told the cartel.
SANCTUM MCCONNELL
Black gas belched from Ryan’s eyes, mouth and nose. McConnell considered simply abandoning him. He had trifled with the darkest magick.
One last try, as payment for backing tax cuts.
McConnell spoke in tongues.
The demons howled.
SOMEWHERE IN THE ARCTIC CIRCLE
Bill Clinton felt 20 years younger, his fists wet with blood, his heart pumping. Obama had done his thing, deftly jumping over bodies, neutralizing the enemy without batting an eye. Bill was more like a bull in a China shop than Obama’s graceful gazelle. But the job was done.
RUSSIA – THE KREMLIN
Putin was still angry. The incompetence was staggering. His operation was in retreat, and they hadn’t seen it coming.
His phone rang. Not the red one. The one next to it. A bright yellow light flashed.
He picked up.
“This is Oprah.”
SOMEWHERE IN THE ARCTIC CIRCLE
“Joe.”
“Barack.”
The old friends regarded each other as Obama loosened his restraints. In the corner, a shell-shocked Cheney moaned. His golden manacles shattered after Clinton’s deployment of the sonic weapon.
“I knew you’d show”
“I cut it close”
“You guys,” Kerry chuckled.
WASHINGTON, DC – THE RUBIO RESIDENCE
Rubio poured the vial.
Kellyanne was busy retelling how she had left a CNN host tongue-tied.
The liquid bubbled and hissed.
Rubio considered flip-flopping as he so often did, throwing out the concoction. “No, do it,” he steeled himself.
CLINTON RESIDENCE / THE ARCTIC CIRCLE
“Dear”
Hillary rolled her eyes at the sound of Bill’s voice.
“You’re out with Biden again”
“Yes —”
“Bill.”
“But Obama’s here too. Kerry also.”
She felt better hearing that. He and Biden were a train wreck together. Obama was on point, however.
WASHINGTON, DC – THE RUBIO RESIDENCE
Kellyanne downed her drink in one gulp. Rubio arched his eyebrow, anticipating… something.
She laughed.
“Oh, Marco. You and Mitt thought I’d drink your little tea and just collapse at your feet. We who serve the dark forces are immune to your earth poisons.”
SOMEWHERE IN THE ARCTIC CIRCLE
Cheney snarled as Kerry tied him down on the backseat of the helicopter.
“Behave!” Biden commanded, and rapped him on the nose with a newspaper.
He turned to Obama and embraced him. “Good workin’ with you again, chief.”
“Same.”
The Hague would have a new prisoner, soon.
RUSSIA – THE KREMLIN
The Kremlin was in darkness. Putin stared at his display. It was chaos. All his pieces were in disarray. He could still hear Oprah’s voice, echoing over the phone. That laugh. She had him over a barrel. It wasn’t over. But he was no longer on top.
WASHINGTON, DC – KUSHNER/TRUMP RESIDENCE
She kept Jared close to her. She could have punished him further, but she preferred to prolong his humiliation. Ivanka pressed a button, and the screen in the middle of the desk lit up with a map.
“This is how we get back in the game,” she began.
Jared stared at the ground.
LONDON, ENGLAND – JOHNSON RESIDENCE
Boris Johnson stepped out of the shower and dried his hair. He tried to recreate his signature “unkempt” look. The smoke grenade landed next to his feet. In seconds he was nose to nose with James Corden.
“The Queen wants a word, you Russian stooge.”
Johnson fell t
o his knees.
WASHINGTON, DC – MCCONNELL RESIDENCE, EARTH PLANE
Paul Ryan woke up with a scream. He felt like he had been screaming for days. McConnell pulled away the sopping wet palm fronds that covered his body and slithered next to Ryan.
“You live”
“I’ve seen the other side. How did you…”
“Rest, boy. We have work to do.”
MANHATTAN, NY – TRUMP TOWER
Eric Trump could not figure out how to get his straw into the box of apple juice and began to cry.
SOMEWHERE IN MIDDLE AMERICA
Comey nodded. This was a long strange, trip. He felt he was on the right side of history, but he thought about the costs and the damage that had been inflicted.
On his screen, Oprah nodded and cut off the transmission.
This was for the best, Comey thought. Wasn’t it?
WASHINGTON, D.C. – THE WHITE HOUSE
Tiffany had her arms crossed across her chest. Her father sat at his desk in the Oval Office, scowling.
“So great, Tiff.”
At least he remembered my name, she thought.
“This isn’t for you… Dad.” She spat out the last word.
“Tiffany, come on.”
“I didn’t like lying to Comey.”
WASHINGTON, D.C. – THE RUBIO RESIDENCE
A dark, black cloud enveloped Marco Rubio.
SOMEWHERE SOUTH OF THE BORDER
Donald Jr practiced his “tough guy” face in the bathroom mirror. He liked to use it with the cartel because they felt so brown, so tough. The money was in the account. He wanted to run. But this was about his father. They had to fight back.
CALIFORNIA – THE OPRAH ESTATE
Hillary had one knee down on the exquisite Italian tile. She rested on her old sword, it’s steel gleaming in the tasteful lighting, the smell of fall wafting through the breezeway. Outside, light rain drops fell against the thick glass windows.
“Rise,” said Oprah.
“We have a lot of work to do,” Oprah said. Hillary nodded. “This first strike reset the chess board. But the others - Putin, Trump - won’t sit still.”
“They never do,” Hillary answered.
“We have to be prepared.”
“We will be.”
WASHINGTON, DC – THE OBAMA RESIDENCE
Barack Obama smiled. Michelle smiled back.
“It’s quiet,” he noted.
“It’s never quiet, Barack. The whole game is back.”
“I know. I know. You should have just told me.”
“You boys can’t keep a secret.”
“True.”
- END EPISODE I –
POST-CREDIT SEQUENCE
Bill Clinton opened the door. Standing there were Kerry and Biden, big grins on their face. “God love ya, Bill, you look like shit.”
“Hello, dear.”
“Have you ever been to Siberia?”
“I’ll get a coat.”
Author’s note
If you enjoyed this story, or even if you didn’t, please follow me on Twitter @owillis (http://twitter.com/owillis) or visit my website, http://oliverwillis.com
Oliver Willis
The Deepest State Page 4