by Godiva Glenn
“You were okay with this just a few days ago.”
Troy tugged a hand through his short blonde hair, brows lifted in a purely overwhelmed manner. “Or I just thought I was. How do I tell my mom this? That instead of the picture-perfect family, I’ll be one of two or three men in Chell’s life? That I won’t even know if I gave her a kid without a DNA test or comparing features? And I bet we can’t have a dog because she’s a bear, and is taking me to a planet with fucking dragons? I pride myself on taking things in stride and stepping up to challenges, but eventually, even I have to ask if it’s worth it. I want to be a decent guy and accept her and everything that comes with her, but I can’t pretend this is the future I expected or wanted.”
The rant came like an avalanche Gabe never expected. There was a lot to unpack in Troy’s fears, and some of those concerns now became Gabe’s as well. Gabe wanted children. Would it matter if they weren’t biologically his? And when did dragons come into the equation?
He stood and placed his hands on Troy’s shoulders, forcing him to look him in the eyes. The man looked entirely lost. Gabe pulled him into a hug and patted his back. The right words didn’t come to him. Gabe wasn’t the one who had great advice and inspirational quotes to get them through hard times. That was always Troy’s strength.
He rubbed a hand over Troy’s skull and yanked him close so that their foreheads touched. Staring into his turbulent blue eyes, Gabe saw someone unfamiliar. A side of his best friend that had remained dormant for so long, tapping into it had sent him spiraling.
“A perfect family is one that loves each other. For me, it was you and Sandra. You know my parents weren’t worth shit, but what you and I had, what we still have, that’s perfect to me,” Gabe said fiercely.
“I know,” Troy muttered. “But—”
“No buts. We have each other. No matter how this ends, we’re still going to be friends. Even if that means taking a portal or whatever back and forth. There’s going to be a way for it to work out.”
Troy grinned weakly, and some of the half-panic half-melancholy air around him lifted. Gabe released his hold on him and picked up the tray.
“I’m going to bring this to Chell, then we’re going to get drunk and watch a movie or play games, anything to put the serious shit on the back-burner, at least until tomorrow.”
Troy nodded. “Fine.”
Gabe left the room and carried the food to Chell’s door. He knocked and waited, hoping he wasn’t intruding on anything too intimate. Chell met him with a weary expression. She’d been wearing the same tank top and sweats since yesterday and her hair was a chaotic tumble of black curls.
Beyond her, Valdus appeared to be sleeping. The swelling on his face seemed to have reduced greatly, and Gabe saw no more bloody cuts. It relieved him to know that Valdus’s recovery was going well, especially given the hell that it was putting Chell through to see her former lover so battered.
He held out the sandwiches and chips. Chell took it with one hand, and with the other grabbed Gabe by the shirt and yanked him close.
She kissed him as if starved, and it took him by surprise, but it was the best surprise he’d had in a while. He had to refrain from molesting her, as it would be wasted if he made her drop the food, but it took every ounce of control. Her soft lips and sweet taste sent his head spinning and blood rushing directly to his now aching cock.
Pulling away slowly, she licked his bottom lip then her own. She met his shocked look with a heavy-lidded stare of lust. Another moment passed before she released the tight hold on his shirt. She patted away the wrinkles as she spoke.
“I still want you both,” she said. “I heard everything, and I promise. Once there is time, we will talk.”
His mouth opened to apologize for not realizing that she could hear them, but she placed a finger across his lips.
“And so you know, I did consider using you both as sex toys. But I am not so shallow as to have ever expected that to be enough. It just so happens you are both magnificent in bed.”
He didn’t answer, but the door shut in his face with the last thing he saw being Chell’s devious grin.
There were countless places to grab a drink in the city, but the men of 42 only regularly frequented one; the Green Man’s Pub, located just a few blocks from the station. It was a true hole in the wall. No sign outside, just a green door centered on a brick building surrounded by other brick buildings. It looked nondescript, though some would say derelict thanks to the blacked-out windows that you couldn’t peek into but could see out of when inside.
For many of the firefighters, it was a second home. Gabe and Troy didn’t have the same devotion to the place as the rest, but tonight was a good time visit. When Gabe had seen the text from Lee inviting him out, he’d taken it as a sign.
He and Troy needed to get out, and they could just as easily drink with the guys as they could alone at Chell’s rental.
“There they are!” Mitchell’s voice boomed through the dim room as Troy and Gabe walked through the doorway to the pub.
The crowd was small as usual. Lee was at the counter ordering a drink and Carter and Skip, two other guys from 42, were standing at a tall round-top with beers and pretzels. It was exactly the atmosphere Gabe needed, and he nudged Troy forward with a grin.
“Irish car bombs,” he said.
Troy groaned. “That’s how you want to start?”
“Damn right.”
Troy made his way to the counter and Gabe met up with Mitchell, who slapped his back so hard it almost made Gabe trip.
“Didn’t think you’d make it,” Mitchell said.
“Why not? Nothing better to do.”
The large man gave him a look. “Wasn’t sure if you’d show your face after pissing on the probie’s stuff.”
Gabe laughed and glanced around. “Is he here?”
“Nah. He doesn’t like joining us because Skip teases him and he can’t complain to an authority figure here.”
“That’s ridiculous,” Gabe muttered. Skip teased everyone. He was, hands-down, the most annoying bastard Gabe had ever met. “He talks shit about everything he notices. You tune him out.”
Mitchell gave an agreeing nod and they walked to the bar. The half-pints of Guinness were lined up with shot glasses in front of them. Troy had ordered enough for the full crew.
“Buying your way back into our hearts?” Lee joked. He chugged the rest of his lager and scooted down to the free drinks.
Skip rolled his eyes. “Only girls and fags do shots.”
Mitchell grabbed his set and moved to one side. “It’s not a shot, it’s a cocktail.”
“Says who?” Skip asked.
“Says the Lieutenant,” Gabe said lifting his shot and saluting Mitchell. “I trust it.”
Lee counted down and they all dropped their shots into the pint glasses and chugged. Gabe wiped his mouth on the back of his hand and downed Skip’s before signaling to the bartender and ordering a beer.
Troy slapped him on the back. “Don’t go crazy.”
Whatever. The shifter resort offered to chauffeur since they were staying with Chell. If he wasn’t driving, he was drinking.
“So tell me, what have you been doing with your time? Slowly drifting into madness?” Lee asked.
“Not quite.” Gabe took a swig of his beer. “Actually, I started seeing someone.”
“Really now, you? Figured Troy for the settling down type.”
Gabe leaned again the counter. “How is seeing someone the same as settling down?”
“You’re the bachelor. If you’re making time to see her, then you’re probably crazy about her. Bet you’ve already got a ring picked out.”
Lee was probably halfway right, but Gabe didn’t realize he was that predictable. Scanning the room, Gabe replied, “I wouldn’t plan for a trip down the aisle just yet.”
Troy, who’d listened in and watched quietly now turned to Lee. “But if he were thinking of settling down, any advice?”
Lee scoffed. “You want relationship advice?”
“Just curious,” Gabe said, glancing at Troy.
Lee’s shoulders lifted for a second. “You ain’t gonna like it, but you put her first.” His expression shifted from joking to serious. “It’s tempting to act like the job is your wife, and your wife is your mistress, but only fools make the mistake of following through on that.”
Gabe didn’t like the sound of that and didn’t entirely understand why. He wanted to be with Chell and saw that there was no way she could give up her role to her clan and stay on Earth. Yet the obvious answer felt like regret waiting to happen.
“By the way, probie got into your locker and burned your things,” Lee said under his breath.
“How the fuck did he do that?”
“Prybar. And he’s paying back the station for it. Destruction of property’s apparently a severe offense. Chief practically busted a nut when he presented probie with the bill.”
Gabe would gladly drink to that. There was nothing in his locker worth a second thought except… he lowered his beer. “All of my things?”
“Mitch grabbed some of it.”
Gabe left them behind and tracked down Mitchell, who had moved to the card table with Skip and two strangers.
“I heard you saved some of my stuff,” Gabe said nonchalantly.
Mitchell lifted his chin then gestured away from the table. He rose and he and Gabe stepped to the side.
“Been holding these just about every night, waiting for you to show.” He patted Gabe’s back and slipped two envelopes out of his jacket.
Gabe took them, folded them in half, and shoved them into his pocket. “Thanks, man.”
“Nearly got my own damn self suspended getting those out of probie’s hands,” Mitchell said.
Gabe nodded and looked around. No eyes on him, so he slipped out the side door. He didn’t enjoy smoking, but it gave him privacy and served as a distraction when needed, like right now.
He lit a cigarette and inhaled slowly while unfolding one of the letters. He read the words he’d written hastily one day when he wasn’t even sober. It didn’t make any sense. The ramblings of someone too stupid to say what he felt.
If he had died on the job and Troy got that letter, the shame would have followed Gabe into the great beyond. It wouldn’t have even mattered had Jason read it, because it said nothing worth repeating. He pulled out his lighter and brought it to the corner of the paper. He watched it catch flame then dropped it and watched it burn to shriveled black scraps.
The other letter was fine. He didn’t need to read it to remind himself of how much care he’d put into writing a message to his unofficial second mom.
The door he stood by opened and Troy peeked out. “Smoking?”
“Yeah. I’m done, though. I’m coming back in.” He kicked the remains of the paper until he was satisfied it wouldn’t somehow burn down the pub to spite him. “I’ll challenge you to darts.”
Chapter Seventeen
Troy
Troy pressed his palms into his eyes as he listened to music and tried to relax. Even though the sun was going down outside, he was still feeling the lingering effects of the hangover that had found him this morning.
Gabe swore exercise was the key and had gone running, but Troy didn’t buy into that school of thought. Nope. For him, the remedy was soft music, water, and praying for a time machine to go back and stop himself from having that sixth round of shots.
A door closed down the hall, and it had to be Chell’s since Mara was still gone and Gabe hadn’t yet returned. He sat up and yanked the earbuds out as he saw Chell enter the room. There was a dewy glow to her skin, and her hair was damp. She went to the window across the room and looked out. “For some reason, I thought I was imagining the time. It doesn’t feel this late to me.”
He scooted over and patted the couch beside him. She came and sat next to him, sinking into the soft furniture with an exhalation of relief.
“How’s he doing?” Troy asked.
“Much better. He’s able to walk. It helps if he spends some time in his bear form, it seems. Currently, he is splashing around in the shower.”
The image of a massive bear showering flickered into Troy’s mind. It was ridiculous, yet this was his reality now. He placed an arm around her shoulder and pulled her to relax against him. Even though he still internally reeled about his pending decision, it felt natural to keep her close.
“Gabe said you heard us yesterday.”
“I did.”
“And your thoughts?”
Her body shifted toward him and she propped her leg over his lap. “I have had too many thoughts. I can usually arrange matters in order of importance, but in this case…” she scrunched her nose and stared at his chest. “Everything seems to have priority.”
“Try.”
She walked her fingertips across his shirt, studying them. “After we brought Valdus here, after I washed him and placed him in my bed, I came out here and saw you and Gabe speaking to Mara. I didn’t expect that.”
“That she’d tell us everything?”
“No, that you remained. You found out who he was to me on the ride back. I thought that while I cleaned his wounds, you’d pack. I thought that when I was tucking him in and holding him, you’d leave. When I walked out of that room, I expected you’d be gone.”
Troy stiffened. “Is that what we should have done? Would that have made it easier on you?”
“No.” She pressed her hand flat against him as if she thought he’d try to leave now. “It’s just what I thought would happen. Because for so long, I thought that’s what Valdus had done. I thought that while I had planned for our future, he had planned a way out. And because I had asked you and Gabe for something, you would leave too.”
“But Valdus didn’t leave you. He was taken.”
She took in a deep breath and nodded as she exhaled. “But my mind was already trained to think otherwise, you see? If you prepare your life with certain truths at the center of your reasons, how do you simply change course when the truth was a lie?”
Oddly enough, he understood what she meant. He had his own inner conflicts running rampant. “Do you want to be with Valdus again?”
“I believe so.” She chuckled softly. “You would think it would be the easiest of my decisions. I don’t know if relationships are the sort of thing one just picks up on, after years of being dormant.”
“He’s probably still the person you had chosen back then. A little worse for wear.”
“It seems that way. And he is insistent that we mate. He doesn’t have my hesitance, though I have changed as much as he has.”
“How much of that hesitance is because of me and Gabe?”
She made a gentle, thoughtful noise and searched his face. “None, actually. For me, all of us make sense. I could never choose between you any more than I could carve my spirit into sections. If you would mate with me, you’d understand. It would connect us all, and you would see how we come together and make a whole.”
He wanted to believe her, but what she spoke of didn’t have a human equivalent. Not really. “Would we be married?”
“We could have whatever ceremony you wish. On Solara, mating is a celebration we hold in highest regard. I would be glad to incorporate your Earth rituals back home.”
“You celebrate mating? But isn’t it just… I just can’t imagine having a party and having sex.”
She grinned at him. “We aren’t ashamed of sex. Traditionally, we would mate—in private of course—then announce ourselves to the clan. There would be a feast, and then we would return to our privacy and do our best to ensure that our mating results in offspring.”
“I see.”
“I could not imagine bringing you to Solara until you have my marks, however. It would be better to mate before introducing you to my clan.”
“Why’s that? Why couldn’t we visit and see how it suits us?”
Her lips pursed f
or a moment. “For the same reason I did not wish to mate with you alone. There is a risk of being challenged.”
Troy didn’t like the sound of that. “A challenge as in a fight? With a shifter?”
“Exactly. If I had brought you alone, then I believe you would have been challenged, and I could not have saved you from it.”
“Not that I lack confidence in my defense skills, but I don’t think I could fight a bear. I would, for you, I guess… but…”
“It’s moot. With you and Gabe together, I doubt there would be a challenge. But just in case… and besides, if you held my mark, my clan would trust you. After all, Solara is still a secret to humans. You would be the first to witness it.”
He made a mental note to discuss the challenge concept and the possibility of it to Gabe. A fight to the death for Chell seemed almost normal given everything else, but best to be prepared. I always knew my dick would lead me to trouble. “Okay then explain marks.”
She mimicked clawing his chest. “It’s a mark. A scratch. While you are inside me, I will carefully claw you here. Or your arm. Or back. If you pick a spot beforehand, I will honor that choice. Otherwise… heat of the moment.”
“That sounds…” He wanted to say kinky. Hot. But also, “Painful.”
“You’ll barely feel it. I promise your blood won’t really be flowing to your arm.” To demonstrate her meaning, her hand slid down to cup him between the legs.
“You have to scratch all of us?”
She nodded.
“So, we all have to be inside you?”
“Yes.”
“At once?”
Her mouth opened slightly, and she seemed to ponder the question. “I don’t know if I can handle three cocks at once, but I could try if that what would make you happy.”
He blinked at her. “Make me happy?”
“You like a man’s cock pressed against yours, do you not? Valdus is as magnificent as you and Gabe. I think you would enjoy it.”