by Adrian P
Chapter 4 / Part 2
It was daytime but the skies were dark, covered by volcanic ashes revolving across the planet. Residues fell on Kotabaru like dust rain, covering the city under the colour grey. Audi sat on a rubble amid Armed Forces convoy, blanketing himself with a plastic poncho. He kept silent, even as Troopers and Marines around yelled for planetary evacuation.
“Found you,” a woman spoke from behind.
Dina stood while holding a black umbrella, approaching the boy’s side as she kept her sight towards the cityscape.
“Why aren’t you with Petit Fantome?” she asked. “I thought you’re still going after Konstantin?”
The boy turned to Dina with dead eyes.
“You…alright?”
“What is all right anyway? It’s a relative term.”
Dina sighed. “Her Imperial Highness wants your presence.”
“Why?”
“She needs to discuss the current situation with you,” Dina replied. “With the planet in the brink of catastrophe, the Princess wanted to know your opinion, to borrow your wisdom.”
“Wisdom, huh?” Audi stood up. “I’m anything but wise, maid. You should ask someone else.”
He walked away.
“Hold on!” she put her umbrella down and caught the boy’s shoulder. “After what you’ve done for her all this time, why are you running away? At the very least, you should consider your duty and loyalty as a subject of The Crowned Confederacy. The Princess summons you, and you are obliged to—“
“Duty and loyalty? To The Crowned Confederacy?” he sneered. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”
“To hell with what you say, The Princess wants to talk to you,” Dina gritted her teeth. “If you won’t abide by her command, then I shall convince you through force.”
Audi sighed. “Fine, I’ll go. Satisfied?” he turned to Dina. “But make sure it’s a quick one, I want to get out of this damned planet.”
“The more I see people, the sicker my guts become.”
Princess Victoria stood in front of her desk, reading news article while issuing commands to the Military Sector. She ordered a global-scale rescue operations, but local geologists told her that they’re running out of time. The planet’s core has destabilised, and when the equilibrium snapped, the planet’s climate change will be irreversible.
The door behind her opened.
Audi walked towards her with baby steps and pale face, albeit his expression was neutral.
“I just finished coordinating planet-wide survey, and the situation is dire,” Victoria said. “As soon as I’m done, I want you to organise a way out for us. It’s too dangerous to remain here—“
The boy kept silent.
“Audi?” the princess asked. “Is…everything okay?”
“Don’t bother saving everyone,” the boy replied in monotone. “Let’s just get out of here.”
“What?”
“We don’t know when this world is going to collapse. The better we sod off, the better,” he replied. “So now, we should—“
“There are still hundreds of millions of people stranded across this planet,” Victoria replied. “They are my subjects. I will not abandon them, no matter what.”
“How are you going to fly millions out of this planet?”
Silence.
“Major cities have been destroyed. Kotabaru is the only settlement which population centre has not been hit—a precise calculation of Konstantin’s,” he said. “There is a limited number of spacecraft in this city, so it’s wise to leave as soon as possible before the population hoards them.”
“What will the people think of a princess who runs away from danger?” Victoria’s voice stiffened. “Do you think that makes a good rapport? In a time where I need the full support of many to fight against Crown Prince Christopher’s vision to run our civilisation like a business? Where profit and loss, efficiency and effectiveness determine the basis of policy judgment instead of humane concerns?”
Audi flinched.
“If I leave this planet ahead of the people, they will see me as a creature no different from my cousin—someone who live for my own benefit,” she continued. “I’ve dedicated the past three years to sustain Prince Horlix’s achievements, his reason of existence, to prevent this galaxy, our humanity, from descending into a brutal, natural selection jungle of survival.”
“Those works will be lost if you die.”
“Those works are as good as lost if I leave.”
The boy clenched his fists and glanced away.
“I thought you cared about the people, Audi,” Victoria frowned. “Has everything you’ve told me been a lie? How you’ve suffered. How you want nobody else to suffer like you do. Is it just a huge plain lie?” she paused. “Isn’t this why you wanted to support me?”
Audi closed his eyes. “I want to support you. I want to protect you so you can continue your fight…but…”
“But?”
“How are you so confident that we can change our world?”
Victoria paused.
“I’ve seen. Listened too much. How any effort to change the world are doomed from the start,” the boy shivered. “How anyone who even think of changing the smallest aspect of their life will feel the brunt force of status quo. How they will be side-lined by the world. How they will be hurt. How—“
“You can’t give up,” Victoria stepped forward. “Everything is dark in the beginning, but there’s always light at the end of a tunnel.”
“What if that light is a damned train heading towards us?” Audi frowned. “We cannot turn back time, but the way forward is a future where we’re all screwed.”
“That—“
The boy clenched his fists. “I came here to find a medicine to cure someone. Someone who have suffered from the way the world works. Someone who wanted to create a world where nobody has to suffer like she does,” he paused. “But people. Humans. We can’t change them. Once they believe in something, they—“
Victoria put her hand on his chest.
“The Three Laws of Social Change,” she said. “Ever heard of it?”
Audi listened.
“It’s a staple theory taught to every member of The Royal Family. Roughly analogous to Newton’s Three Laws of Motion.”
The boy listened.
“One: society has an inertia, a tendency to remain on its path. In other words, status quo will always prevail when no disturbance is present.”
“Disturbance…”
“Two,” she raised two fingers. “Moving society from status quo requires a disturbance. A force. And the size of this force will determine how big society will change, and how fast this change will occur.”
“What do you mean size of force?”
“The bigger the force, the more violent the disturbance is.”
Silence.
“Which brings me to the third law,” she raised the third finger. “For every action, there exist an opposite and equal reaction, that is, the more violent your force is, the bigger the resistance people would put up. The more deaths will occur. “
“That—“
“Hence you see the nuances, the complexity of changing the world,” Victoria clasped both hands in front of her. “Whether you seek to change a society or an individual, The Three Laws remain valid. How much change you want to bring. How fast we need it to be. How much sacrifice we’re willing to bear. How much pain we’re willing to inflict.”
Audi looked away.
“It is painful to be the only one who sees the wrong of our world. It hurts to see people remain deaf to the loud bell ringing next to our ear. I know. I’ve been there. I am currently there,” she continued. “But even if we’re among the few, we must keep fighting. We must embody the change we try to preach. We must, most of all, keep hoping. That it is possible for the world to become better.”
“Then let me ask you something, princess,” Audi marched forward.
“Will you marry me?”
The boy kept silent.
“That…I mean…” she panicked. “What am I supposed to say?”
“A yes or no.”
“I...that…” she fidgeted. “Maybe…yes—?”
“Why the fuck is that your answer?”
The princess paused.
“Are you blind?” the boy’s voice deepened. “Look at the difference in our status. You’re a royalty, and I’m a damned peasant. You have all the money in the world, but my account is drier than the desert of Planet Vurste,” he said. “Can’t you see the issue? There’s zero bloody benefit of marrying, no, even harbouring a feeling for me.”
“Benefit?” Victoria glared at Audi. “Is that what you think of me? Is that how you think I calculate whom and why I marry? Why I love someone?”
“Love?” the boy sneered. “What is love anyway?”
Victoria flinched.
“Is love not an illusion? A notion we conjure out of thin air, to veil our attraction to the benefit others may bestow upon us? Carnal. Financial. A lie we cast upon ourselves so that we appear more sophisticated, much less egoistic and shallow than we truly are?”
“Why would you say that?” Victoria stomped once. “Love is the basic foundation of humanity. Love is the reason we fight for others. Love is—“
“Don’t give me that nonsense,” Audi interrupted. “Survival is the basic foundation of humanity. Everything we do revolves around survival. Survival of self. Survival of species. Whatever crap love is supposed to be, its existence is justified only to support our survival instinct,” he said. “People marry not out of love, but out of survival instinct. An economic union. To ensure cooperation for survival in a harsh fucking world where everyone needs fucking money to live and survive!”
Victoria stepped forward.
“You cannot love someone who has no money. Without money one cannot buy food. One cannot own a house. One cannot groom oneself to a satisfying appearance. One cannot afford dates, an essential ritual of courtship and attraction,” the boy spoke faster. “The very idea of romance and love—“
The princess grabbed his collar and swung him to the sofa.
The boy fell back-first, landing on two pillows stacked on top of each other. While he reeled in confusion, Victoria took a step towards him. Another step. She leaned forward and placed one hand on his cheek.
“Do you want to know what love is?”
“What—“
The princess closed her eyes and kissed him.
She pulled off slowly, dragging the touch of their lips for as long as she could. Her heart beat three, five times faster than usual while her breath followed its rhythm.
“That is love,” Victoria’s spoke softly to a near whisper. “Of a princess who owns everything, towards a peasant who owns nothing. Of a girl with millions to speak of, towards a man with ears of a billion.”
She kissed him again.
“Call me a boring traditionalist, but that was my first and second,” she continued. “A royalty is expected to remain chaste and untouched until the hours of union, but I’m willing to throw the vow away. All to confess my love for a peasant. A peasant who owns nothing. Nothing but everything.”
“Everything?” the boy asked. “What do I have?”
“The heart of a billion which trillions do not possess,” Victoria replied. “A heart that experiences pain a billion times greater than those of commoners; the many, including the rich, who live only to benefit themselves.”
Silence.
“I do not love you in the image of myself. I do not love you in an ideal I conjure. I’ve had enough of that. Of people who love others simply because they reflect themselves. A true narcissist.”
Victoria leaned forward and embraced him.
“I want to build a world we dream of. I want to present it to you. That no matter how utopian our goals are, they are still worth reaching out. They shine upon us a path of progress. A road to move forward. It is this road I want to walk. Together. With you. The human I desire to join my life together with.”
“But what can I do?” Audi asked. “You need a titan to change the world. I am but a tiny speck of sand in a universe full of stars.”
“I don’t need a star shining bright, for they will only blind my path,” she replied. “Even if many wish to be queens and kings, I’d rather hold a hand that will keep me from flying too high away from the ground. Not a giant whose shoulder I could stand on, but a heart I’m proud to live and die by.”
The boy listened.
“Marriage will be opposed by many. I understand, that we live in a world defined by wealth and class, but nevertheless, I’m marking you.”
“Marking me?”
Victoria faced him straight while sitting on his lap. “This peasant is mine. No one shall have him. At the very end of our days, the ring I wear will be the ring he wears.”
She closed their faces’ distance, slightly brushing her lips against his. The princess draped her arms around his neck and pushed forward, kissing the boy longer, deeper than before. The boy’s hand started loose, but he returned her embrace. He clenched his arms tight around her and stood, carrying her to the bed. Leaning down, the boy gently placed her over a silky, purple bed cover. With heavy breath they kept silent for seconds, then Victoria pulled him down—leaning his left ear towards her lips.
“Please take care of me,” she whispered with heavy breath.
The boy placed an arm over his eyes. His heartbeat was still rapid, even while lying down with both legs and one arm spread wide. He sat up and grabbed his bandana on the tableside; it was tangled in mess. He scanned around for seconds, then looked below the bed. How did my clothes end up there?
The bathroom door opened.
Victoria walked out, spreading a gentle scent of lavender aroma throughout the room. She brushed her silky black bob-hair with her hand and tidied the strands and flow down. The princess turned to the boy.
“Clean yourself,” she said. “If Ayu and Dina smell my perfume on your body, they’ll kill you.”
Audi chuckled. “Are they dogs or something?”
“In battle, they’re far worse than the most rabid ones,” she replied. “Hurry, we need to find a way to evacuate the people of this city.”
“Understood, Your Imperial Highness,” the boy jumped off bed and walked towards the bathroom. As he passed by the princess, she glanced away with a flushing red face.
The boy grinned. “Really? Weren’t you—“
“Shoosh. Hurry and cleanse yourself,” she bit her lips. “I’m going to discuss our next course of action with Ayu and Dina.”
“When you’re ready, join up with us outside.”
The Bandana Boy pulled a hose from the bathroom wall and pointed its nozzle onto his bare skin. A warm steam burst out and covered his entirety. Dirt began peeling off, falling to the slanted floor surface into a ditch, flowing out through a sink. He closed his eyes as the warmth enveloped him.
I thought the princess was attached to me since I saved her from Petite Fantome. I didn’t know that…she harbours that kind of feeling all along.
The boy pressed the off button, and the steam ceased puffing.
I’m confused. Even more confused.
He stepped out of the bathroom and wore his clothes. Wrapped his scarf around the neck. Swirled his bandana around his forehead and tightened it. Put on his boots. His gloves. His utility belt.
For what reason do I love? With whom am I truly…in love? How do I know?
The boy skipped a beat.
If I…marry the princess. Will that make me love her? Even more? Will that diminish the potential of me harbouring said feeling upon others?
I don’t understand.
The more I know about love, the stranger it becomes.
How do I know if I’m in love?
How do I know if I don’t simply want to benefit fr
om their presence?
Do I have to stop thinking about it and just go with the flow?
Then what’s preventing me from loving others just to take advantage of them?
I can’t stop thinking.
But I don’t understand.
Please tell me.
What should I do?
Charley?
Chapter 4 / Part 3
The city’s traffic turned lively again as thousands of cars jammed the roads heading towards the spaceport. Christina, Rachele, and Charlotte walked on the pavement, carrying large suitcases with their combat equipment stashed within.
Charlotte stopped walking.
Troopers climbed into a fallen building and escorted a family out of the ruins. The mother and the son bled, while the father broke one leg. Hundreds of combined Police-Trooper rescue teams scoured into destroyed housings, apartments, and offices. Three-quarter of those they dragged out were dead.
“This is the least affected city in the entire planet,” Charlotte said. “Can you imagine what happened to the rest?”
Rachele turned to her. “Most buildings aren’t designed to withstand such a catastrophic quake, Charley,” she said. “Nothing can possibly prepare us for what Konstantin has done.”
“If only we have the power to stop him,” Charlotte clenched her fist. “But…but…”
“We might have a chance if we keep working together with the military,” Christina interrupted. “But you ruined it.”
“That—!”
“I don’t know what happened to you and The Bandana Boy, but your insistence in parting ways is jeopardising our effort to fight Konstantin,” Christina frowned. “Do you know what Konstantin is capable of doing? And if the Brotherhood actually intends to use his superweapon to destroy many more worlds, do you know how many lives, humans and non-humans, are in your hands?”
Charlotte bit her lips and shrivelled.
“I fought my entire life to save our galactic environment, Charley,” Christina marched towards her. “I gave up on eating meat after I discovered the brutality we imposed on animals. I gave up on most plant products after I discovered how much destruction the entire agriculture industry is causing worlds. I gave up on many accessories, from wood furniture to metal-based jewelleries, after I discovered the devastation timber and mining economy have inflicted upon us,” she paused. “Do you know how much I gave up? How much inconvenience I’m willing to live in, just to make the tiniest difference in our world?”